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The Landlord.
Monday, September 3, 2012
new girl stranger i met on the internet new girl stranger i met on the internet

After waking up every day at an unholy hour, driving upwards of 2 hours each way, putting 550 miles on my car, and paying $46 in toll fees to commute back and forth between my sister’s place in the OC and my job in Manhattan Beach, I’ve finally moved into my new place in Redondo Beach! I couldn’t be happier that I’m only 2 streets away from my work now.

When I found this steal on Craigslist and submitted my rental application, the landlord who lives upstairs mentioned that he loves Filipino food and has never met a Filipino he didn’t like. I mean… if he only leased the bottom floor of his townhouse to me because he thinks I know how to cook Filipino food, then he’s in for 3 months of disappointment!

GPOY.
Thursday, August 30, 2012

himym robin crying under desk

Everything happened so fast with the move that I didn’t have time to think about it. I’m so much happier at my new job, but I miss my friends. I miss my family. I miss my dog. Le’sigh.

Two, Please!
Monday, August 27, 2012

office

If heaven is a 6×8 glass-enclosed cubicle, then this is it.

I’m Out!
Friday, August 24, 2012

fuck you you're cool half baked

This post has been sitting in my drafts for the past year or two (or five), and today I finally get to publish this shiznittle bam snip snap sack!

‘Sup.
Friday, August 17, 2012

the one with monica's thunder joey acting young sup

12:48 PM me: ugh i’m sooo over this fifty shades ppt
they keep making changes!
12:49 PM Jesse: sup with the wack ppt presentation sup
me: lolol

Chatting with you is the only thing I’m going to miss about work! It puts a smile on my face when you send me nick@nite texts and pictures of your 22″ hot dog, so try not to forget about me after I blow this popsicle stand!

New Position.
Sunday, August 12, 2012

will and grace and vince and nadine - Last night, I accepted a new position. Then, after my date left, I got a call about a new job. - Karen Walker

I’m officially the new Web Designer for Skechers! LA, here I come… Yikes!

Dirty.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012

annual carwash

I guess it’s time for my annual car wash.

Cleanse.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012

happy endings penny hartz cleanse suicide happy endings penny hartz cleanse suicide
happy endings penny hartz cleanse suicide

I was roped into participating in an office juice cleanse. I wasn’t sure what to expect, and it kind of feels like the first day of school. Minus the fact that you get to eat solid foods that day. I’m pretty sure we’re all going to hate each other by EOD.

Some days I’d rather be homeless.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012

i like this job only marginally more than i like being homeless - someecard

I went outside to grab something from my car when some creeper who works a few warehouses down tried to hit on me. He said that he has seen me around and has been meaning to introduce himself, all while staring at my chest! I hadn’t had any coffee yet, and I was not in the mood to be ogled. I told him I needed to get back to work, and he told my chest to come visit him anytime. Ugh. I truly wonder if he felt that went well.

I’m going to file this encounter under ‘reasons I need a new job,’ along with having to buy dental groupons because my work doesn’t provide basic dental insurance.

Cookie Dough Brownies.
Friday, April 27, 2012

cookie dough brownies

I baked these cookie dough brownies for my boss’ baby shower at work today. I don’t plan on eating any of them, but I’m sure I gained 3 pounds just thinking about it.

Also, I’m skipping the gym tonight. This has nothing and everything to do with brownies, but I mostly just wanted to get that off my chest.

Unacceptable.
Friday, April 13, 2012

someecard publicly unacceptable work

…although it’s questionable how publicly acceptable I look when I’m not at home!

Apparently, while I’m at work gchatting with my friends (which is frequently—unless my boss is reading this, in which case it’s occasionally and only on nights and weekends), they’re at home wearing mascara while I’m out in public without a stitch of makeup on.

God forbid I run into the love of my life at Starbucks while wearing my yoga pants that, if we’re being honest, have never been worn to yoga.

Titanic.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012

thaitanic

2:28 PM Jenni: we need someone to reenact the titanic pose for our facebook contest but no one wants to!
  why dont you and jesse do it? 🙂
2:30 PM me: absolutely not
Regret.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012

phils bbq office lunch

I instantly regret wearing jeans instead of leggings to work today. How can I stuff my face with Phil’s BBQ when my clothes are so binding?

Wake up, slut.
Monday, March 26, 2012

happy endings - wake up slut

Is it 5 o’clock yet?

Friday.
Friday, March 23, 2012

zebra running man animated gif

3:14 PM Jesse: this friday is lasting foreverrrr
3:15 PM me: i’m just gonna watch this zebra doing the running man for the rest of the day

Oh, sweet jesus… there’s a video.

The Big Spill.
Monday, March 19, 2012

water broke

4:42 PM me: what happened by the water cooler?
  it looks like somebody’s water broke over there
4:43 PM Jesse: c’mon man!!!

Sometimes I feel bad for Jesse because he’s one of the only dudes in the office… but then I remember that he gets to work with me, and I don’t feel bad for him anymore! Ha 😉

Coworkers.
Thursday, March 8, 2012

let's go shit on coworkers in a more informal setting - someecard

Or… Belle, Jesse and me at happy hour last night.

4:06 PM Jesse: i wonder what they were saying about her
  me: idk dude, prob talking madddd shit
4:07 PM Jesse: obvi nothing as clever or funny as what we say
  me: well, obvi!
Wild.
Saturday, February 4, 2012

macbook pro and domo sushi

Another Saturday night in working on my design portfolio and eating enough takeout from Domo Sushi to feed a small village.

My Saturday nights have been pretty wild lately.

Moving forward.
Sunday, January 29, 2012

it's not who you are that holds you back. it's who you think you're not

Lucky.
Monday, January 23, 2012

chinese new year red envelope

I picked the luckiest red envelope at work today! In other news, I’ve forgiven the white elephant gods for my booby prize.

Oh, cruel world.
Thursday, December 22, 2011

anthropologie birthday discount

Not only did I receive a reminder from Anthropologie that I’m turning thirty next month, but I also got stuck with a “family” frame (for the husband and kids I don’t have) at the white elephant gift exchange at my office today.

If only I had picked the booze that Jesse brought so I could drown my sorrows.

3:18 PM Jesse: so im going to the home depot parking lot in 15 minutes to buy nye tickets from dude off craigslist
  me: i hope you have your gat strapped
3:21 PM Jesse: if im not back in 30 minutes, call the police cuz ive likely been stabbed and robbed
  me: can i have your white elephant gift if you don’t come back?
3:22 PM Jesse: of course
All the livelong day.
Thursday, December 22, 2011

sony earbuds christmas gift

I’m pretty sure this is Jesse’s way of saying that he no longer appreciates hearing me blast Young the Giant in my shitty earbuds all the livelong day.

Merry Christmas to us both!

Rampage.
Friday, December 9, 2011

workplace rampage somee card

My co-worker Jesse just sent me this right now. Apparently, he couldn’t help but notice that my soul died a little more than usual at work today.

Parched.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011

dead plant

I think it’s safe to assume that no one watered my plant while I was out of the office.

(It probably didn’t help that I never watered it while I was here, either.)

Teach.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011

angela viens fb post

Not only do I teach my interns how to polish a turd in photoshop, but I also encourage them to forego their grad school scholarships and follow their dreams.

Somewhere, right now, Angela’s grandma is giving me the stink eye.

Feelings.
Thursday, November 3, 2011

bridesmaids - are you fucking kidding me?

I find that my feelings toward work this week are best expressed through animated gifs. In addition, I really picked the most inopportune time to lay off the booze.

Worst. Day. Ever.
Monday, October 31, 2011

philip rivers - worst day ever - chargers chiefs

No lunch break at work, an hour of unpaid overtime, and a Chargers loss. Is my pet’s head gonna fall off next???

You said it, Rivers…

Happy birthday, Jesse!
Tuesday, October 25, 2011

post it prank

Happy birthday to my BFF at work! I didn’t come in an hour early to post-it bomb just anyone’s desk 😉 My appreciation for you runs deeper than your secret love for Hootie and the Blowfish. And I think we both know just how deep that is. Ha!

Chat.
Friday, October 14, 2011

gchats

There’s an indirect correlation between the amount of work I get done and the number of gchats I have going at any given time. Today is Friday so… you do the math.

Something more.
Thursday, October 13, 2011

there must be something more

Survey says.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011

aiga survey of design salaries

4:51 PM Christian: AIGA Survey of Design Salaries
4:52 PM me: i have this bookmarked at home
  i look at it every time i need a good cry
4:53 PM Christian: lol
Double Dipped.
Saturday, October 8, 2011

i'm double dipped in three shades of fuck - weeds

This was me after the recent layoffs at work these past few weeks.

Jesse said it was so quiet in the office yesterday that you could hear a mouse fart. My boss let go of half of our marketing team (including the two interns I wasted six months of my life training), and I’ve been given all of their marketing responsibilities. If I have to google how to do one more fucking Excel formula, I might have to cut a bitch. And since no one else is left, it might have to be Jesse. Or that farting mouse.

Heat wave.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011

odometer

2:09 PM Jesse: what the hell is this weather
  me: someone turned the a/c off again!
2:10 PM Jesse: heads will roll
  me: that shit should always be on
  Jesse: seriously
  beezies can always put on a jacket
2:11 PM we can’t strip down
  not w/o being paid anyways

Shit is about to get real up in here. I’m either going to cut a bitch or take my pants off.

Untouched & Unused.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011

jesse jt's

Yesterday, I brought my lunch and gym clothes to work.

My untouched ground turkey is still sitting in the fridge because Mary and I had 25¢ wings at JT’s instead, and my unused gym clothes are still neatly folded in the trunk of my car because Christian wanted to go to happy hour.

My work’s proximity to the bar is clearly foiling my plans to eat better and work out.

Match.
Monday, July 18, 2011

Match.com coupon

Should I consider it a warning sign that my manager sent me this coupon? I still haven’t decided whether I’m offended or secretly grateful! Ha. In her defense, she met her boyfriend on Match.com.

As much as I hate having to charm my way into free drinks at bars, I just can’t bring myself to meet a guy in a place where 15% off coupons are accepted.

Extended Happy Hour.
Saturday, July 9, 2011

i'm glad you're not dead in a ditch somewhere

craziness and amazingness

I went to work yesterday morning, had happy hour (and a $200 tab according to my bank account!) at JT’s with my coworkers afterward, never made it home or to The Casbah as planned with Jessie last night, and woke up this morning in my coworker’s apartment.

Contrary to the last time I went out with all my work friends (AKA my manager’s drunken birthday disaster of 2008), I’m pretty sure we’ll all still be speaking to each other on Monday! Ha.

Chanandler Bong.
Thursday, July 7, 2011

paul walker running scared

9:06 AM Jesse: that rape van has been parked outside for like two weeks
  me: is there someone inside who needs our help?
  like in running scared… wait you’ve seen that right
9:07 AM Jesse: mmm i dont remember that part
  me: were you distracted by paul walker’s piercing blue eyes?
  i’m sure that was it
  Jesse: you know i must have been
  speaking of which
9:08 AM i rewatched casino royale and quantum of solace with daniel craig
  dude his eyes are like the color of windex
  me: omg there’s this movie i want to see
  with the transponder and clive owen
9:09 AM Jesse: you mean the transporter? jason statham?
  me: wait wait wait
  are you talking about daniel craig’s eyes right now lolol
  you know i was gonna say transporter, and then i was like no, it’s transponder… is that even a word

Yes, I got Jason Statham confused with Chandler Bing. And yes, this pretty much sums up what the rest of my day at work looked like.

Sleep Monster.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011

This is me every day at work around 4pm.

Heavy dose.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011

man the fuck up someecards

4:08 PM Jesse: is it gay that i’m listening to unchained melody?
4:09 PM me: i’m not gonna lie… it’s a little bit gay
My favorite intern.
Friday, July 1, 2011

keige tom wallpaper

Meet KG, a marketing intern at work and my new desktop background (courtesy of my intern, Angela).

I told him that my shitty office chair made my back hurt, and he said, “Sit up straight. Like my mom used to tell me, ‘Tits to the wind!'”

He’s quickly replacing Christian as my favorite intern (sorry, Ang! Ha!).

Sweet aroma.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
10:31 AM Jesse: you smell cigs?
  me: not over here
  just my own sweet aroma
10:32 AM Jesse: close your legs
Forgiven.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
10:41 AM Jesse: you look mad skinny
  i really noticed when you came over to help out angela
  i thought it was someone else!
10:42 AM me: thanks, man 🙂 coming from someone who sees me 40 hours a week, it’s nice that you noticed!
10:43 AM Jesse: for sure! lookin good 🙂

In related news, Jesse is officially forgiven for writing this love note on my car:

dirty car windshield

Overdue.
Friday, March 18, 2011

aloha pink lei

I haven’t had a vacation in… what year is it now?

My Hawaii trip with the girls was before Chel got married, before Pammie bought a condo in the OC, before Shi was the maid of honor in three different weddings, and before I sold my soul to the company I work for. I only have ten months left till my dirty thirty, and I’d like to live a little before I start extreme couponing for Olay Regenerist. Just kidding. I’m Asian—I fully intend to look like I’m twenty-something well into my forties.

With two new graphic design interns starting this month, I think I might be able to take an actual vacation this summer. And maybe I’ll even be bikini-ready by then! Okay, maybe just tankini-ready… let’s not write checks my body can’t cash.

Hipster Alert.
Friday, March 4, 2011

hipster nerd black rimmed glasses

Jesse: hipster alert
Me: what’s she wearing?
Jesse: all black. rivers cuomo glasses.
Me: wait, are you talking about me or the girl who’s here for the interview???

Chez Nous.
Thursday, March 3, 2011

chez nous spicy chicken melt

I love when my preggo co-worker’s husband brings her Chez Nous, because that means I get Chez Nous, too! Their spicy chicken melt fixes things in the universe. Throw in some garlic parm fries, and we have a meal I’d ask to marry me.

Exposed.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011

modern family cam free wheelin'

This was me realizing that my blouse was unbuttoned and my boobs were exposed after I interviewed this tall drink of water who applied for our graphic design internship today.

Lemonade Stand.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011

comic sans lemonade stand

I’m looking for a graphic design intern to assist me with overflow work. If you’re well-versed in Photoshop/HTML, don’t mind working with a bunch of female twenty-somethings, and kick ass in Taboo, please respond to our Craigslist ad here.

Needless to say, the guy who sent me his cover letter in Comic Sans will not be getting a call back from me.

Reminder.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011

valentine's day hearts

Arlene’s 7-year-old daughter, Gisella, made me a Valentine’s Day card at school because she knew I didn’t have a Valentine this year. Thanks for the reminder, kid! Haha. I love that little munchkin. I would pin her card up in my cube at work, but it’d be overshadowed by Belle’s gaggle of heart-shaped balloons!

27 Inches.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011

I got my sexy new monitor at work today:

new monitor

Jesse: all the girls were gushing when belle & jen got their flowers & balloons & shit
Me: oh for fuck’s sake… good thing i was off on monday
Jesse: it was pretty barftastic… not that we’re bitter or anything
Me: pfffft. who needs a man when i have 27″ right here in my face?

Paper. Snow. A Ghost!
Saturday, February 12, 2011

friends - the one where the stripper cries - joey on pyramid - paper snow a ghost

When I came into work on Friday, they told all the employees we were going to have a mandatory meeting at noon. Jesse and I went crazy trying to figure out what sparked this unexpected meeting—Were they laying people off? Did they find out that Jesse drank that unclaimed Red Bull in the fridge? Are my yoga pants too casual for Casual Friday???

Four hours later, I found out that my stomach fell out of my butt for nothing. They surprised us with a 30-minute break from work to play Taboo: Marketing vs. Customer Service!

Krystal: It’s something you might eat for breakfast
Me: Pancakes. French toast. Eggs. A biscuit!
Krystal: It’s fluffier.
Me: What’s fluffier than a biscuit???

We won (even though I couldn’t think of anything fluffier than a biscuit), so the customer service department has to make us coffee every day next week!

My annual review was amazeballs, my boss ordered me a 27″ cinema display to show her appreciation, and our marketing team smoked customer service in Taboo. Work was def good to me this week.

Morning.
Friday, September 17, 2010

all the coffee in colombia won't make me a morning person

Our office hours are changing, and I’m expected to be bright eyed and bushy tailed an hour earlier than usual starting Monday. FML.

(photo via *December Sun)

Lucy, you know I don’t speak Mexican.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010

brownies with peanut butter frosting

I’m not sure how I got swindled into baking brownie bites with peanut butter frosting for the Cinco de Mayo potluck at my work when a) I don’t even eat anything at the potlucks because I Lean Cuisine it during the week and b) what the hell do brownies with peanut butter frosting have to do with Cinco de Mayo? Someone scribbled “Marion’s brownies” on the sign-up sheet underneath the guacamole and tortilla chips. Freak ass freaks. You bring something good once, and people just won’t let you forget about it.

Risky operation.
Thursday, February 11, 2010

Jesse: almost there…
mayanrocks: you all wired out?
Jesse: wired out?
mayanrocks: are you done watching your dvd set of the wire?
Jesse: ohhhh. im on the 3rd epsiode of the last season. i got mass effect and havent touched the dvds in the past three days lol
mayanrocks: you usually get me. i don’t even know who you are right now.
Jesse: i know seriously…im like delirious right now. i haven’t had any coffee today.
mayanrocks: you almost done with the game?
Jesse: it’s like a 30-40 hr game and im only like 11 hours in so far.
mayanrocks: !
Jesse: thats nothing, the last game i got back in november, dragon age… thats like a 40 hr game at its shortest and ive logged in 100 hrs between my two characters. lol jesus im such a nerd.
mayanrocks: so… you gonna get metal legs pretty soon?
Jesse: i’m thinking about it… it’s a risky operation, but it’ll be worth it.

Working with people who get my pop culture references is the only thing that helps me keep my sanity—especially on days like this when I have to finish four newsletters and three homepage banners in one week because this Monday is a holiday, and deadlines don’t care about your scheduled days off (even if they’re unpaid).

Cheesy.
Thursday, January 28, 2010

babybel pyramid

Jesse: You’re such a dork
mayanrocks: says the guy with the cheese wax pyramid on his desk!
Jesse: Hey, that’s artistry you philistine!
Jesse: I need to buy more yellow Babybels to accent the sides
mayanrocks:
Jesse: God, I’m such a dork

Aloha.
Sunday, January 27, 2008

aloha

I miss Hawaii. The food. The beaches. The weather. The lomi lomi massages. The BOYS. Sure, I can eat kalua pig and spam musubi at any one of the L&L joints in San Diego. And sure, I can pick up entire loaves of taro bread at any of the Asian supermarkets in San Diego. And sure, I can go to any beach I want in San Diego. And fine, the weather is pretty much the same in San Diego most of the year. But do we have Hawaiian boys over here? Maybe. But it’s not the same. The more I travel out of San Diego, the more I’m convinced I’ve exhausted my stay here. They closed my favorite dive bar earlier this month, and if that’s not a sign that I should get out of here, I don’t know what is. Hawaii is so laid back. I consider San Diego pretty laid back. At least more laid back than LA or NYC. But Hawaii is ridiculously laid back. Like telling us to meet in front of the hotel at nine in the morning to be driven to the moped rental store and us showing up ten minutes early and waiting twenty five minutes for someone to arrive kind of laid back. And I like to consider myself a laid back, no worries kind of girl. Even when we were transferring boats to go from jet skiing to parasailing, we were hurrying to take our life jackets off and cross over and the HOT! parasailing instructor said, “There’s no rush, darlin’… This is Hawaii.” That was probably the exact moment I decided I wanted to marry that man stay there forever. Yet here I am… blogging from the Valley. Hawaii was just so amazing. I plan to revisit again and again in this lifetime. My vacation couldn’t have been any more perfect. I miss the girls already. I miss trying to sleep through their symphony of snoring (okay, maybe they miss trying to sleep through my snoring). I miss waking up to Shi singing “Morning’s here.” I miss Chel sticking her fish eye camera in my face. I can’t wait till our next trip together. Until then, it’s back to the real world! Boo whore.

The real world ain’t so bad, though… Since I’ve been back, I’ve received an unexpected promotion at my second job where I’ve been a graphic design intern for the past couple of months. All of a sudden, I found myself putting my two weeks in at AAA. I’m sad to be leaving, but I just can’t pass this promotion up! Starting next month, I’ll have nights and weekends off. I won’t know what to do with myself. I suppose I could go to the gym and lose all that weight I planned to lose BEFORE going to Hawaii. And all that weight I gained while I was IN Hawaii. Or I could just have more time to blog about how much I want to lose weight while snacking on these chocolate covered macadamia nuts I brought home from Hawaii…

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