{"id":95,"date":"2005-01-18T08:05:03","date_gmt":"2005-01-18T15:05:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/wordpress\/?p=95"},"modified":"2005-01-18T08:05:03","modified_gmt":"2005-01-18T15:05:03","slug":"i-have-no-driving-skills","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/?p=95","title":{"rendered":"I have no driving skills!"},"content":{"rendered":"

So I got into an accident today. My first accident EVER (with another car at least). I’m surprised I didn’t get into one sooner with my horrible driving skills. I was driving around the lot at UTC looking for a parking space. I see this family walk to their car near the top of the aisle, so I post it on the side waiting for them to move out of their parking spot. I pick some lint off my pants, change the song on my ipod, drum my fingers on the steering wheel… all the while thinking WTF is this biatch doing??? I’m gonna be flippin’ late for work! <\/em>I was sitting there FOREVER. There was this parked van blocking my view of the car I expected to pull out, so I moved up to see if they punk’d me and just went to their car to drop their things off and weren’t really leaving. But sure enough, as soon as I move forward and throw up my arms to give them the universal sign for “what the f*ck?” I see their reverse lights go on. So I back up no more than one foot and then BAM. I hit a Mercedes F*CKING Benz! I was off to the side of the aisle so that cars could still pass through the aisle while I waited an eternity for the parked car to pull out, so I scuffed the front right corner of the Mercedes with the back left corner of my car. I got out of the car thinking UNF*CKINGBELIEVABLE<\/em> and I see my white paint on her car, but no dents… There was this huge black scratch on it and when she saw the look on my face she said that the scratch was already there. I started touching the paint scuffs with my fingers and the paint started rubbing off. She said “I could probably get it buffed out” but who knows what she’s gonna do. She drives a freakin Mercedes<\/em> and wrote my insurance information down on a Pottery Barn<\/em> card. Why couldn’t I have hit some janky ass car whose driver had no license and insurance? Haha. Damn you, UTC! *shakes fist* To make me even more upset, the lady who took a jillion years to back out her car so I could take her spot had the audacity to get out of her car and rudely tell me to MOVE MY CAR so she could get her car out. UGH! I was so frustrated, so the tears started flowing when I finally parked my car. I walked to my store crying on the phone to Edgar when I passed my boss. She stopped to make sure I was okay to work. She probably thought someone died or something LOL. Who the hell gets worked up over a freakin fender bender? Mayan does! My deductible is $500 dude. I have enough money problems as is. Of course<\/em> my WONDERFUL weekend would be offset by this. Oh, well. It could’ve been worse, right? I seem to be saying that a lot lately.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So I got into an accident today. My first accident EVER (with another car at least). I’m surprised I didn’t get into one sooner with my horrible driving skills. I was driving around the lot at UTC looking for a parking space. I see this family walk to their car near the top of the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-95","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/95","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=95"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/95\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=95"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=95"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mayanrocks.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=95"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}