» 2003 » October
Big apples, windy cities, and Dolly Parton.
Friday, October 31, 2003

By this time tomorrow, I’ll be in Sin City. Do I sound too much like a tourist? Is that like calling New York the Big Apple? Or Chicago the Windy City? Or the San Onofre Nuclear Power Plant the Dolly Parton Monument? This is the worst time for me to be vacationing because a) I’m SICK and b) I’m in the middle of a menstrual nightmare. It was Sharon’s first day back at work today and I was slightly peeved that they moved her desk far, far away from me. Purposely? Perhaps. It just sucks that NO ONE sits around my cubicle, leaving me to talk to myself like a crazy person (One time, I was in Ed’s bed and he went downstairs and I was thinking to myself, but talking out loud, and this went on for like… five minutes… then I look over at the doorway and Ed’s sitting at the top of the stairs just staring at me and trying to contain his laughter… I felt so retarded!). Just when I thought my day couldn’t get any worse, I got my paycheck at the end of my shift and it was half the size it was supposed to be. Red Envelope somehow forgot to pay me for two of the four days I worked last week. I was really counting on this paycheck to fund my Vegas trip this weekend, too. I was on the phone with Ed and I was just so upset and he was just trying to make me feel better. I don’t like people paying for me. I don’t know. I’m just not used to it. It’s not a pride thing. It just makes me uncomfortable, even if it is my own boyfriend. While I’m on the phone with him, my sister drops a BOMB on me via text messaging: “I’m not going to Vegas.” I get off the phone with Ed and call her ass in Fullerton and she knows that I’m already upset from this f*cked up day that I’ve had, but she has two midterms on Monday and I know how much of a school nerd she is… so I let it go… She calls me half an hour later and tells me that she’s GOING to Vegas now, because she knows that I’ve had a shitty day and this would make me happy. Indeed. She’s the BEST! I unsuccessfully looked for a costume after work (since everyone going to Vegas seems to have a costume all of a sudden!), then went home and was surprised with a visit from Jay and Leah. They wanted me to go out with them for some drinks, but I was just pooped from work and being sick and driving around all day. I’ll take a raincheck, guys! We definitely need to hang out more, Leah… Shell called me afterwards and we talked for like an hour about the insanity that is her MOTHER. I wish I had better words to comfort you, but my mom is normal so I can’t really relate. Haha. This will probably be my last entry before I go to Vegas. I’ll be gone till November! HEHE. I hope all you kids have a safe Halloween 🙂

Case of the blahs.
Thursday, October 30, 2003

I’m at work. It’s freaking RAINING (about five days too late). Usually, I LOVE the rain. I love wearing warm clothes and snuggling up with Edgar (Just kidding. We don’t do that shit. LOL)… but I don’t love driving in the rain (I’m a bad enough driver on dry roads)… and I don’t love being sick while it’s raining. I took a phone order from some guy name Jose from Orange, CA and he said I had the “cutest voice ever!” Probably because I’m sick and I sound like a nasal 4-year-old today. I would’ve stayed home from work, but I need the money. I turned my cell phone off, because I don’t really feel like talking to anyone. I just have a case of the blahs. Shoot me an e-mail or send me a note on my chatterbox if you need to. I’ll be on the computer at work the whole day.

Everything happens for a reason?
Thursday, October 30, 2003

I just checked my work E-mail and found a nice little surprise in my mailbox:

From: Carlos Ramon
Sent: Wednesday, October 29, 2003 2:35 PM
To: Red-San Diego
Subject: Thank you, Marion!!!

Marion took a phone order yesterday from a customer that was so impressed with her that she asked to speak to a supervisor to let us know just how wonderful a job Marion was doing. She said, “She’s fabulous…she was really wonderful, really helpful, really smart, easy to talk to….” Wow!!! Great job, Marion! We all really appreciate it!

YAYE ME. It feels nice to be appreciated (especially after my horrid day at work last week). Anyway, school in SD is cancelled for the rest of the week (which doesn’t really apply to me since I only have classes Monday/Wednesday). Four days have passed and the fires are STILL burning. Unbelievable. You know how the fire started in the first place? Some idiot-hunter-guy was lost, so he made a smoke signal so he could be saved. Someone should’ve told this idiot-hunter-guy that there’s a high enough risk of brushfires during SANTA ANA weather without him starting a brushfire of his own (for those of you non-southern-Californians, Santa Ana weather consists of really strong, really warm, really dry winds). By saving himself, he killed over a dozen people, burned down over 1,500 homes, and closed down schools for an entire week. I remember a few years back when a fire broke out in Alpine because some moron threw their cigarette out of their car window and trapped the East County residents in their homes because the only freeway out of there was on fire. I didn’t think it could get any worse than that. Today, Arlene told us that her close friend’s body was found yesterday burned so badly that the only way they could identify the body was through his dental records. What kind of f*cked up shit is that? Who gets punished for these deaths? These lost homes? I can tell you who ISN’T getting punished! The idiot-hunter-guy! It’s just like that old grandpa who mowed down all those people at a farmer’s market in Santa Monica with his car. He killed 8 people (including a baby) and no charges were pressed against him because he was old. These past few days, all I kept thinking about was how much nature favored disorder, come to find out today that all of these horrible things happened because some guy got lost in the woods. I’ve always been a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, but recent events are diminishing any faith I have left in that belief. I may not be the most religious girl in America, but my prayers go out to all those affected… Today, I spent the entire day with Bedhead Ed. We picked up Arlene and Zell from the airport (welcome home!!!), spent some time at their house, (window) shopped for snowboarding gear, and had dinner at Pat & Oscar’s (thanks, poopoo). We got into a microscopic fight before I left his house, but it all seems so trivial now that I’m watching the news and people are crying in front of what used to be their homes.

Snow day.
Wednesday, October 29, 2003

San Diego’s still up in flames, so I have no class tomorrow AGAIN. Geez. I feel weird going about my business like everything’s fine. People lost their houses. They lost their cars. They lost everything they owned. They lost their loved ones. I haven’t lost anything but the luxury of breathing clean air. Luckily, nothing has happened to anyone I know yet… I’m glad I’m going out of town this weekend. The ash outside is killing me. In elementary school, I always envied the kids in other cities that had “snow days” and got to stay home from school. Snow days were unheard of in SD. Now we’re going on our third snow day this week, but it’s snowing ashes instead of pretty snowflakes. Gah! Right now I’m at work and I’m cursing myself for wearing a skirt today. I’m freezing! It was DAMN hot yesterday and I was wearing a long-sleeved shirt. I’m all backwards. My critical thinking skills are deteriorating. Blame it on not having to attend school for a week. An hour and a half till I’m off work… I just want to snuggle up on the couch and watch my WB shows 🙂

Brushfire fairytales.
Monday, October 27, 2003

I had a DAMN good weekend, but I feel bad talking about how much fun I had, because there’s brushfires raging all over San Diego. The air smells like campfire, the skies are brown and the streets of SD look like one big ashtray. I was supposed to go to Desiree’s baby shower today, but she lives in Scripps Ranch and they had to evacuate their homes there. Over 200 houses have burned down and the fires just keep spreading… They closed all but a few freeways. Barely anyone has work or school tomorrow, because either their work burned down or the freeways will still be closed or their houses burned down… The closest fire to me is maybe 20 minutes away, so Spring Valley hasn’t been forced to evacuate their homes. It’s a scary thought. What would I take with me? My 7-year-old cousin, Aimee, had to evacuate her home and the first thing she grabbed was her hamster. I would probably take my photos and letters… they can’t be replaced. Everything else is either replaceable or unimportant. I hope that everyone’s houses are okay… Yesterday, we celebrated Chris’ 22nd birthday. I had SOOO much fun. It’s always fun to kick it with people you knew from back in the day. We all went to Rock Bottom for some dinner and dancing. Chris and my sister were SO f*cked up. Chris is a funny drunk. My sister lets loose when she drinks the Grey Goose! Haha. I’m glad Sheenie came along, because no one gets down on the dance floor like she does! We all chilled at Yardhouse afterwards before heading home. I was DD because I would much rather have everyone have a good time drunk than me. I can have fun without the alcohol (but it’s so much FUNNER *with* the alcohol! Ha). At least I’ll remember what I did the next day (unlike Chris who was driving home from PB and ended up waking up in front of someone’s house in El Cajon!). A good time was had by all. We’re gonna have MORE good times when we go to Vegas this weekend for Halloween! It’s also PAYDAY on Friday. I can’t wait… Last Friday, I had a pretty HORRIBLE day at work… I don’t want to think about it, so I’ll just move on… My sister came down from Fullerton, so we watched “School of Rock” with Ed. It was funny. I like pretty much any movie with kids in it (except “Children of the Corn”). Throw Jack Black in there and you’ve got a winner. On Thursday, I watched Liza on “ER” (she’s the Filipina nurse who kept saying, “Yes, doctor” and “Diniguan” in the ugliest fobulous accent haha. She doesn’t even have an accent in real life which makes it even funnier!). I remember back in the day I was watching “My So-Called Life” and I saw her in one of the bathroom scenes! I was SO into Claire Danes at the time, and I couldn’t believe she got to work with her. Then I saw Liza on an episode of “Gilmore Girls” and I was SHOCKED. “Gilmore Girls” is my *favorite* TV show. If she gets to be on “Will & Grace,” I WILL DIE! Haha. I really look up to her for making it this far. Who knew she’d go from singing at family parties to acting on prime time TV?

Friday, October 24, 2003

Right now I’m on my break at work. With more and more seasonals coming in, I hope I don’t have to share my cubicle with someone. I’m super anal about being organized at my desk. I only use clear thumbtacks. All the papers posted on my walls are perfectly aligned at 90 degree angles. I have my mini photos hanging on my wall and a few framed photos on my desk and my Linkin Park pencil holder cube filled with my own pens and highlighters… In the beginning of this year, I came to work one day and was mortified. Multi-colored thumbtacks held up wrinkled papers aligned at different angles. Scrawled out notes on sticky post-its covered my monitor. Some of my pens were missing. My catalog was missing (and I know it wasn’t my sister again, because she wasn’t working here anymore! Haha… Last year, I came to work and my catalog with my name sharpied on the cover was missing from my desk. I was talking to my sister during my break and I was like, “Yeah, some bitch took my catalog!” and she was all, “Uhhh, it was ME!” LOL). Fortunately, my deskmate was moved to a different cubicle because our schedules overlapped… I finally saw Sharon and Kit today! I haven’t seen them since I left last June. Sharon and I were talking and James was like… “Oh, no… The two of you are together again!” We used to sit in adjoining cubicles near James’ desk and he would hear all of our loud ass conversations. I’ve missed her crazy ass over the summer. It feels good to be back.

Unique smells and urine mints.
Wednesday, October 22, 2003

Today was my first day back at work. I didn’t fall asleep last night until three in the morning, and I had to wake up at six to get ready. I felt like I was in high school again, because it’s been that long since I’ve had to wake up at 6:00 a.m. and shower. I hate the 8 o’clock shift, because I have to leave an hour early due to a.m. traffic. SUCKIES. Oh well. It’s only for refresher training anyways. My availability will be from 9:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m. so I don’t have to get up too early or get out too late. It feels like I never left Red Envelope. I still remember how to do everything. Some things have changed around a little (some supervisors quit… some people got promoted to supervisors… some desks were moved around)… but all in all it still feels the same. It even SMELLS the same. Isn’t it weird how places have their own unique smell? Like friends’ houses… or TARGET. Every target smells the same. I always wondered if they had some kind of Target air freshener so my house could smell like Target, too… After work, I had lunch with Ed at L&L’s (YUM), then I went home and had a hard time staying awake. I fell asleep around 3 o’clock, didn’t wake up till about an hour ago, and now I have a massive headache. Chel, Sheenie, Joey and Shell… Sorry I missed your calls. I was taking an extended nap! I don’t want to bother you guys so late, so give me a call tomorrow if you need to. I have classes all day and work in between, so you’re gonna have to catch me. HMM. Just leave a message and I’ll get back to you somehow… (Never mind, Chel, I just got off the phone with you! Hang in there… “Everything is okay in the end. If it’s not okay, then it’s not the end.”) I just heard that they did a study on bowls of breathmints that restaurants provide, and people who use the restroom and don’t wash their hands after urinating stick their filthy germ-infested fingers into the bowl and take breathmints. Traces of urine were found on the mints, so you’re basically sucking on URINE mints… and it’s not YOUR urine, either. Your pee, someone else’s pee… It’s gross no matter what. I’m like the GERMaphobic QUEEN so you won’t see me taking any after dinner mints at restaurants anymore. BLEH. Wash your hands, you filthy mcnasties!

Pass the Courvoisier… over to someone else.
Wednesday, October 22, 2003

Last night we celebrated Raechel’s 22nd birthday. She was stressing out because she was worried that no one was having a good time, but she stopped worrying after the girls bought her a round of drinks haha. We ate dinner at her house in PQ first (Pat & Oscar’s! No one touched the salad, though. We didn’t want to DIE). We played pin the tail on the donkey for a lovely CASH PRIZE. In the end, it was between me and Daniel, so we had to do rock, paper, scissors for it. Haha. I lost of course (I’m not athletic). Oh well, he deserved it since he came all the way down from the LBC. We had some pre-fade action at Chel’s house with Chambord Sours and Courvoisier shots. I half expected Busta Rhymes to show up. Courvoisier is NASTY. I’ll stick to b*tch drinks, THANKSSSS. We hit up PB Bar & Grill afterwards. I only had one drink there. For some reason, I wasn’t up for partying last night. I just wanted to chill. The girls had a LOT to drink and they hit up the dance floor, but I stayed with Ed on the patio. He was tired from work and his allergies were acting up because everyone around us was smoking. He’s always tired because he works too much, and he always has allergies because if it isn’t his pops smoking at home, it’s someone else smoking wherever else we’re at. Poor kid. When we left PB, it was almost closing time and Chel’s boyfriend, Antho, was passed out in the patio… “Beer before liquor makes you sick quicker.” You said it, Antho. Haha. My sister and I stayed up till 4:30 in the morning watching the season one DVD of Will & Grace. That shit is HILARIOUS. My sister woke me up butt-early in the morning. She talked to the girls and found out that Roxy hooked up with some guy (already? HEHE)… and there was some DRAMA after we left… Chel, don’t stress okay 🙂 Do what makes you happy. On Friday, we all went to TGI Fridays for Bobet’s 23rd birthday. Ed and I went to Meehchelle’s house afterwards and watched BOONDOCK SAINTS, my new favorite movie. I had a pretty chill weekend. Right now I’m at Ed’s house and he’s sleeping. This scenario seems all too familiar… SOMEONE’S a workaholic. I start working again on Tuesday, so I won’t be updating this site as often… Who am I kidding? I’m on the internet at work so you KNOW I’m gonna be on this shit everyday!

Back to the coal mines.
Friday, October 17, 2003

Last night I had a craving for chocolate parfait nips haha. Normally, I’d go to Albertson’s to pick some up, but I wanted to avoid the 50+ grocery strikers picketing in front of the supermarket near my house. Just driving through the crowd was hard. I was at a stop sign in the parking lot and one of the strikers (some teenager) stood in front of my car holding his sign and started FREAKING my car for a good minute. I was like.. UHH. HI. PLEASE STOP DANCING WITH MY CAR SO I CAN GET SOME GODDAMN NIPS! Haha. I went to Rite Aid instead. If he was doing this to my CAR, who knew what this kid would try to do to me if I got OUT of the car haha. I haven’t been to the grocery store since the strike started… Hey! I’m EMPLOYED again. I didn’t work all summer since I’m not allowed to gross that much money (so I can get tuition assistance). I haven’t worked since JUNE. Geez… I don’t think I remember how to work. Customers? What are those? Ha. Of course I’ll remember that shit. I’ve been there for like two years. I get to work with Sharon again! YAYE! I miss that crazy girl. Too bad Kit got another job working for Chinaberry (you know you wanna work at Red Envelope with me again!). I’m gonna be so busy working and going to school full-time. I like being busy, though. I hate having too much time on my hands. I became SUPER lazy over the summer… Today, I just did my laundry and vegged at home. Tomorrow Ed is going to install the new deck he bought me! No more wack ass deck and CD changer that only works when it feels like it. Haha. This is what Ed told me when he gave me that ghetto CD changer: “Hey, this was TOP OF THE LINE… ten years ago!” LOL. The new deck doesn’t have a CD changer, but at least I won’t have to worry about not putting a CD in the #1 slot because the #1 button on the deck doesn’t work… or not putting a CD in the #5 slot because if it plays, it’ll get stuck… and not being able to see what track number is playing since the backlight stopped working… and so on and so forth haha. Thanks, buttface. 😉

The old stink eye.
Tuesday, October 14, 2003

I got a B f*ckin MINUS on my graphic design project. WTF. Mine was voted one of the TOP 3 designs in the class and I got a B f*ckin minus. I worked so damn hard on that stupid logo, too. My teacher told me that I have a “fantastic designing style” but she didn’t like how I didn’t incorporate the beach “vibe” as she had suggested (since it’s a burger joint at the BEACH). She didn’t like how I barely changed the logo from the original design I drafted. It’s not my fault that it doesn’t take me 50 billion tries to make a damn good logo! When our logos got critiqued, my classmate Josette said that she wouldn’t change a thing on my logo. Nobody gave me any negative criticism, and I was happy with the way it looked. My teacher says that I can do better. WTF. I know she’s saying that I’m not working up to my full potential. Some people had some really crappy logos, and just because they submitted x amount of different layouts, they got A’s on their projects. That’s bullshit! They all got suggestions from other classmates on how they could improve their logo, but they didn’t tell me to change anything on mine. What else could I have incorporated into that logo? PLEASE INFORM ME, MRS. GRAPHIC DESIGN EXPERT! There was no set amount of layouts we were supposed to turn in, so I think I was unfairly docked a shitload of points! After I got my packet back and saw my grade, I was in a pretty crummy mood. I gave my teacher the old stink eye throughout the remainder of the class, but I doubt she noticed. She was too preoccupied plotting to fail me.

Shitular and smelly kids.
Monday, October 13, 2003

My sleeping pattern resembles that of a graveyard shift employee… except I don’t work the graveyard shift. I don’t work PERIOD. I can’t sleep at a decent hour, because I wake up so late in the afternoon. The only time I wake up before noon is when I’m FORCED to (i.e. on Mondays and Wednesdays because I have school). Otherwise, I sleep no earlier than three in the morning, and I wake up around one, two, or three in the afternoon. At first I thought it was insomnia… but insomnia is characterized as an inability to sleep. I don’t have trouble sleeping. Once I fall asleep, I stay asleep for like ten hours. It’s falling asleep that I have a problem with… and it’s because I wake up hella late… and I wake up hella late because I sleep hella late… it’s a vicious cycle. I wake up around 7:30 on school days. Sheena told me that I should set my alarm to wake up at 7:30 (JED time!) every morning (no matter what time I end up falling asleep), so I’ll get used to getting up early on a regular basis. I told her she’s smoking crack if she thinks I’m gonna wake up that early when I don’t have to… but I suppose it’ll help me go back to a semi-normal sleeping pattern so I’ll try it… but if you see up that early on a non-school day and I’m one cranky b*tch, then you know who to blame 🙂 Anyway, let me tell you about my weekend. As all of you Sh*tular (a.k.a Cingular) customers are aware of, Sh*tular’s service was down the entire second half of Saturday. WACK. We couldn’t receive/make outgoing calls or send/receive text messages. I needed to contact Michelle and Edgar, because we were supposed to go to the Tsunami Bomb show that night. Unfortunately, we ALL have Sh*tular so we couldn’t get a hold of each other. Ed was at work and I didn’t know Michelle’s new house number since she moved down south. It was less than half an hour till the show was supposed to start and Michelle had all of our tickets and Ed wasn’t home yet. Luckily, I was still at home when Michelle called and we finally arranged to meet up and take one car. You don’t realize how much you depend on your cell phone until your provider decides to screw you in the butt and take away your night and weekend minutes. EAT MY BUTT, CINGULAR. I want to switch services. I’ve had this service provider for too damn long… since my Allstate days! Damn… At least three years now. Please help me decide which company to switch to by participating in my random poll at the bottom of this page. Thanks! Anyway, the Tsunami Bomb show was the shizneeto BAM. I want to *be* Agent M. They didn’t perform two of my faves (“Lemonade” and “Mushy Love Song”), but they ROCKED nonetheless. During their FIRST song, some kid chucked his FULL bottled water onto the stage and hit Agent M in the head! She took it like a champ, though. Geez. Rude ass motherf*ckers. If I were Tsunami Bomb, I’d stop after the song and say, “I hope you kids enjoyed the show because it’s OVER, punks!” This dope band called Strike Anywhere opened for them. If you like Rage Against the Machine, you should definitely check them out. It was my first show at Soma and I’m not too fond of that venue. I’d much rather see a show at Canes. Soma is like a warehouse. There’s no ventilation. The sound quality ranges from alright to poor… especially with the loud punk bands. I lost the hearing in my right ear the whole night. It’s really, really, really LOUD, but you can barely make out what the people are singing or saying, especially if you don’t know the lyrics to their song. It was just a deafening experience. Back to the no ventilation, there were SMELLY kids there. I just tried to make it through the show without passing out from the pubescent fumes. This teenage couple in front of me proceeded to swap spit during most of the show. If it wasn’t the deodorant-free kids that were making me nauseous, it was that couple. I’ll admit, I had my fair share of public make out sessions when I was sixteen, but five years later, that shit only happens behind closed doors. At Soma, there was this HUGE mosh pit… HUGE. I’ve never seen one so big before at any venue I’ve been to. At one point this crowd next to us was shoving us to the side and Ed was getting PISSED. LOL. This guy in particular wouldn’t quit bumping into us, so Ed grabbed him by the neck and we remained untouched for the rest of the show haha. The next show I’m going to is the Saves the Day / Taking Back Sunday show at SOMA again… not happy about the venue, but VERY happy about the bands. It should be mellow yellow, so I doubt we’ll have mosh pit or sound problems. Damn, THREE shows in ONE month? Bedhead Ed is really aiming to please 🙂 Today, he bought me Panda Express and Jamba Juice, so I went to his house instead of vegging at home like I had originally planned. Vu, Tuan, Jay and Beejaye were kickin it there and Sheenie came by later so I could straighten her hair. We just chilled till around midnight, then I headed home. It’s now five in the morning… looks like I won’t be sleeping till after school.

Tribute bands and alleged sex scenes.
Saturday, October 11, 2003

Navy Exchange. Jamba Juice. Homework. Hot pockets. Nap. These are the things my Friday consisted of. This cashier at Grossmont’s Jamba Juice whose name tag read “AsHLeY G” looked EXACTLY like Lizzie McGuire’s best friend with the bangs and everything. I would have taken a picture of her so I could show you guys, but I didn’t want her to think I was a LOSER for knowing what Lizzie McGuire’s best friend looks like. Haha. I noticed her when I first walked in, but Ed pointed it out because he’s apparently an avid fan of Hilary Duff. Ed went to TJ with his Audio Excellence boyfriends (I live less than half an hour away from TJ, and I’ve never been there, nor have I ever had the desire to go there… no matter how appealing they made it look on The O.C.). Sheen went to a BAR (I knew it! Haha). Jay and Beejaye watched a movie. My sister didn’t come down to SD this weekend. It was a lazy day. I just went online and talked to Meehchelle about the Tsunami Bomb show we’re going to tomorrow (f*ck yeah!). She wants to be up front at the show, but I’m a little weary about that. I got THRASHED at the Hoobastank concert when I was up front. I don’t think the Tsunami Bomb fans are quite as rowdy, but we’ll see. I don’t want to get dry humped again. Meehchelle cracks me up! We were talking about how Cursor (or Happy Hour as they once were called) is a “tribute” band, if you will. I heard that they have a show coming up at Soma. I remember watching them perform back in the day at SAMAHAN! Hahaha. All I remembered was that they covered Third Eye Blind songs. Doot-doot-doot. Doot-doo-doot-doo. We were talking about how WE could be in a “tribute” band if we wanted to. I’m so down to go to a karaoke bar and sing in front of strangers. I need some liquid courage, though! Haha. Buy me some Chambord and I’ll be good to go! I’m excited about CHEL’S birthday bash next weekend. I miss those girls. It’s always nice to be around the people you grew up with… Hmm what did I do yesterday? Sheen and I drove around the coast for a while just “following the moon.” That’s what we do when we don’t know where to go, but we don’t want to go home. We ate at CONCHING’S because we were both craving some good old Filipino food. We went back to her house and baked some chocolate chip cookies. I’ve never baked anything from scratch before and now I know why. It’s so much easier to buy the pre-packaged pre-cut frozen Pillsbury cookies than measure ingredients and BLEND things together haha. I got batter all over me and Sheen kept making fun of my ass. We were missing eggs so we had to go to AM/PM and buy some. Sheen made me drive back to her house in her car (to my horror!). Even though I know how to drive a stick-shift (thanks to Gerald), I’m DEATHLY afraid of driving a stick-shift. I can’t relax. I panic. I have an anxiety attack. I’m afraid I’ll crash their car. Or kill someone because I forgot how to stop the car. I barely pause at stop signs, because I’m scared the car will stall on me and the people behind me will honk at me and point at me and laugh at me and I’ll cry and I won’t be able to see the road because my glasses will be fogged up. We got back to her house in one piece, though. I may have burned her clutch a little. Ha. We watched the special edition Lion King movie that Jigga Jay gave her for her birthday and searched for the overrated “SEX” scene where adult Simba plops down on a cliff and the leaves and dust particles float into the air and supposedly spell out “SEX.” “Supposedly” is right. We paused that shit and could barely make out the ALLEGED word. Sheen thought her DVD was broken, because the games were f*cking up on her when she tried to play them the other day, but I played them and they worked. I think Sheen’s head is broken. LOL. That always seems to happen… Something keeps f*cking up on you, and when you tell other people or try to get it fixed, it works all of a sudden. Maybe inanimate objects have a mind of their own.

Drunken phone calls and irrational, psychotic moments.
Thursday, October 9, 2003

Yesterday we celebrated Sheenie’s 21st birthday! Finally. I’ve been waiting almost a year for this girl to turn 21 haha. Sheena, Ed, Jay, Gerald, Shell, Jose, Sandy, Brad, Jeni, Sheen’s mom and I ate at T.G.I. Fridays, and then we headed over to P.B. Bar & Grill. I’ve only been there on Thursdays, so there was definitely a different crowd there (like 99.9% white people… ain’t no thang! Sheen’s half Irish. Haha). Shell, Jay, Ed and I got there earlier than the rest of them, so we decided to hit up the dance floor, and Jay busted some moves I’ve never seen before HAHA. There was this Greekish/Chaldean/Mexican-looking guy who was dancing all craaaazy by himself on the top level. At first, people were cheering him on… then people just started making fun of him. It was sad, really. I felt sorry for him. He was in his mid-to-late thirties, went to a club by himself, got ridiculed by youngsters and probably went home to his empty apartment and stray cats. I introduced Shell to the wonders of the CHAMBORD SOUR and I had a few myself. I would have had one or two or SIX more, but all I had left over from dinner was $10. BOO. Ed’s always telling me to slow down. I can’t help but chug those drinks when they taste like Kool Aid (and I ♥ Kool Aid!). Damn, you have to be a baller to get faded on b*tch drinks when they’re $6 each, and you need at least five to f*ck you up. That’s why we should have some pre-fade action BEFORE going clubbin! There’s nothing wrong with drinking at home. Haha. I finally found Sheen after half an hour and she had two Coronas in her hand. This girl drinks beer and belches louder than any guy I know. Like Ed said, “All hell will break loose now that she’s 21.” I won’t have to call her to see where she’s at, because I’ll already know that she’s getting wasted at some bar. I don’t have the money for that kind of lifestyle, but I’ll be your designated driver if you need me, girl! You’re probably a better driver drunk than I am sober, though. HEHE. Anyone will tell you that! Someone PLEASE take her cell phone away so she doesn’t make anymore drunken phone calls to me at two in the morning! Ha.

Anyway, we left PB around midnight and I was disturbed by something someone told me… pretty upset actually. I’ve given it time to digest, so I’m over it now. I don’t feel like I’m doing anything wrong. I don’t use this site as an agent for shit talking. I censor myself A LOT on here. There are many times that I’m hella bothered by certain issues, but I won’t talk about them on here, because I know that a lot of the people who I know personally read this. I know some things that I post will piss off my friends, so some things are better left unsaid. Sometimes I write things clearly out of anger and frustration, and I hope people don’t let these irrational, psychotic moments define me as a person… (especially when I’m talking about relationship issues. Geez. Everyone has drama with their significant other). This is the place where I vent. This is the place where I get it all out so I’m not crying from the frustration of it all. This is MY release. Sometimes the fine line between venting and airing my dirty laundry becomes indistinct. That may bother some people, so I’ll be a little bit more selective about what I post on here, because who knows who’s really reading this shit?

I love Edgar (and Costco).
Tuesday, October 7, 2003

Another Monday. Another loooong day at school. I had a pretty kick back weekend after Roxy’s birthday shindig on Friday. On Saturday, I just stayed home with my family, did my sister’s laundry since she always helps me out and caught up on some homework. My sister and I went to Grossmont for some refreshments that night. I was about to cry, because Jamba Juice’s seasonal Pineappalooza was no longer in season! They replaced it with some Bluetopia shit. I asked the girl if she could still make it, and she did. Cool beans. I almost shed a tear. We went to Ed’s house afterwards to eat dinner since Shell and Joey brought the puppies down. Ed was only there for a little bit since he was helping his Audio Excellence boyfriends prepare the cars at Kenny’s house for the (wacktabulous) show on Sunday. My sister and I just vegged out on Sunday. I finally got the energy to take a shower around 5 o’clock. I decided to stop by the show for a little bit, then go home and go out to dinner with my family for my dad’s birthday. By the time I got to the show, they weren’t selling tickets anymore, and Ed couldn’t get me in because they didn’t have wristbands. I was furious. If there’s anything I hate, it’s wasting gas. I drove all the way down south just to turn around and drive home. Wack. Ed and I got into this HUGE argument on the phone, because I was mad that he didn’t call me to tell me that I couldn’t get in for free, because if I knew that, I *never* would have gone. I’m not gonna pay to see Ed’s car. Kenny’s car. The twins’ car. I see those cars everyday for free. Then he was getting mad because I was getting mad. He wasn’t sure if I was coming since it was getting late already, so he didn’t call. It was just STUPID. My sister called me on my way home and calmed me down a bit. Then I talked to Ed again after that and we were cool again. Ha. It was dumb. Sorry I’ve been so moody, POOPOO. I can never stay mad at Ed. He’s my weakness. I don’t know what it is about him. He’s my special Ed. I love him almost as much as I love sandwiches. ALMOST. This morning between classes, Ed and I went to drop off a baking pan at his grandma’s house and no one was there to receive it. Then we went Costco to pick up some film and it had already been picked up by his parents. What’s going on? We ate some COSTCO pizza (yeah, baby!) and then I went back to school and he went to work. Now I’m home waiting for my next class with absolutely nothing to do… except burn Jay’s CDs… work on The SpecialGuest site… and eat my chicken noodle soup that’s been sitting in the microwave since I got home from school… two hours ago.

Chambord Sours, Foxy Roxy and Drunken Pam
Saturday, October 4, 2003

I wish I had a camera last night! We went out for Roxy’s birthday and I had SO much fun! I went to The Strip Club downtown for dinner with Shi, Rox, Chel, Antho, Kristine, Edward, Glenn and their friends Eileen and Ginger. That place is f*ckin COOL. It’s a steakhouse where you cook your own steak on the grills that they have set up around the restaurant. Too yummy. Afterwards, we hit up Martini Ranch to get our fade on and shake our butts. I only had one drink, because I had to drive since my sister was getting f*cked up all night on Chambord Sours haha. That drink is DAMN GOOD (thanks, Shi!). Ed met us up at Martini since he went to Buca di Beppo for Q’s dinner (happy birthday, Gerald!). It was definitely a different crowd, since I’ve really only been clubbin in PB. They were playing hip hop when we got there, but soon they went to ooooold school rap and then TECHNO and I *hate* techno music (as you can see in my hate list). Antho showed us his moves and I couldn’t stop laughing. We chilled outside and just caught up with each other’s lives. Chel, Rox, Shi, and my sister are my GIRLS, dude. It’s been a while since we’ve all hung out and it felt like no time had passed since we had last seen each other. Shi and Chel are CRAZY! Ed was like, “Whooooaa, take it down a notch!” Haha. Now he sees where I get my loudness from… and you call *me* “mega?” You obviously haven’t met the Tejidor girls haha. They’re crazy without the alcohol. I’m skerd to see them drunk off their asses! Roxy decided to go to the Rox afterwards, but the rest of us were partied out. We all went our separate ways, and my sister, Ed and I decided to hit up D&B’s for Q’s after-dinner thing. It was almost closing time once we got there, so we just chilled at the bar for a little bit. I met DRUNK ASS GRACE for the first time haha. She’s cool beans. My sister, Beejaye and I went to Jay’s house afterwards and we just talked about STUPID GIRLS (don’t worry about *HER* Beejaye!) and watched the food channel HEHE. A good time was had by all. I love hanging out with old friends 🙂 Oh, I forgot to write about Thursday. We just went to Olive Garden near the Sports Arena for Joey’s birthday. Our waitress, Rose, was the shit. ROSE, YOU ROCK!!! (as if she’ll ever read this, but I’ll still give her props).

Rooney rocks my socks!
Wednesday, October 1, 2003

Last night I went to the ROONEY show at Canes with Bedhead Ed and had an awesome time! I’ve wanted to see them live for a while now. I missed them at both Lollapalooza and X-Fest. We went in through the 21+ entrance and there was barely anyone there since it was a 16+ show. I started to freak out because ROONEY was sitting in a booth eating dinner. Edgar and I hung out for a while to see if I could work up the nerve to go talk to them, but I was scared and I didn’t want to bother them while they were eating. We sat on the top level where the stairs are so we would have a better view and could take good pictures. We’ve seen shows at Canes before, so we learned that upstairs is the best place to be. Downstairs, your view might be obstructed by some freakishly tall person or some beezie sitting on the ledge in front of you with her chones peeking out of her Forever 21 jeans (remember HER, Rowell? Haha). Palo Alto performed first. The lead singer had an *amazing* voice. He kinda sounded like Bono. The Sounds were next and they had SO much energy. They’re a female-fronted European new wave punk band. ROONEY came on last and they were FUCKING AWESOME! Robert Carmine has tons of energy, too. Their sound is old school like the Beatles and that’s why I like them so much. I can’t wait to see Tsunami Bomb next at Soma 🙂

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