mayanrocks.com » food and drink
Affordable.
Monday, December 4, 2023

I will never be too poor for concert tickets or Crumbl cookies šŸ˜†

I once got pulled over for expired tags in LA the first day they expired, yet I’ve seen so many cars driving around SD with tags that expired years ago ĀÆ\_(惄)_/ĀÆ

Zuppa Toscana.
Sunday, December 3, 2023

zuppa toscana

Homemade Zuppa Toscana on this cold ass day. The last time I had Olive Garden was my last lunch with Nori before she took me to the hospital šŸ˜… Our waiter held the parm grater over my dish and asked if I wanted a fifth cheese on my four cheese ziti and I’m still laughing about it šŸ˜‚

People think I’m a food snob and too good for chains, but I love me some Olive Garden!

Selena + Chef.
Thursday, November 30, 2023

selena gomez gravy boat gif

selena gomez gravy boat gif

She was, in fact, that girl. Stars—they’re just like us!

I used to watch Selena Gomez on Wizards of Waverly Place on the Disney Channel, and now I’m watching her cook with Chef Alex Guarneschelli on the Food Network. How fast they grow up 🄹

I usually have Food Network on in the background while I’m working, and I’ve never heard so many people mispronounce espresso (ex-pres-so), mascarpone (mars-car-pown), chipotle (chee-poll-tay) and jalapeƱo (ha-la-pee-no). I don’t expect a Green Bay fan white dude in the midwest to be able to roll their R’s and say birria, but how about you learn how to pronounce it first if you’re gonna make it on national television? I was plugging away at my catalog, and I was like, “If this guy says ‘beer-ya’ one more time…” 🤪

dwight screaming gif

Feast Mode.
Thursday, November 23, 2023

It’s leg day, y’all! šŸ—

I had to get this tiny cornucopia, partly because it’s Thanksgiving, but mostly because it reminded me of The Hunger Games.

My mom’s deep fryer decided to stop working after we already dry rubbed four cornish game hens, so my uncle just deep fried them on the stove in a big ass pot of peanut oil. They turned out great! They were so small, they looked like baby birds, but I was assured these weren’t babies LOL. One time, I was watching an episode of Chopped, and one of the secret basket ingredients was a suckling goat and I burst into tears and changed the channel when I saw it. As a rule, I don’t eat any baby animals. Only fully grown animals that have had a good life šŸ˜†

Update 11/24/2023: Pammie told me that cornish game hens are slaughtered when they reach 4 WEEKS of age, so I won’t be eating them anymore šŸ˜…

king crab legs

King crab legs were on sale for $199 for 10 pounds at Costco! I’ve seen it upwards of $400, so this was a steal. Plus, we were near the Costco Business Center, so we went to that one and there were no lines on a Saturday!

Pumpkin pie hack: I bought a big ass pumpkin pie from Costco, used a biscuit cutter to cut out individual servings, and topped them with whipped cream and a sprinkle of pumpkin pie spice. Adorable!

The Costco Business Center doesn’t have a bakery (or food court), so we went to the Grossmont Costco and it was CRAZY. There is a hell, and it’s the Costco in La Mesa the weekend before Thanksgiving.

banana bread

My banana bread fixes things in the universe.

mahjong

If your family doesn’t gamble at holiday parties, are you even Asian???

Rainy Day Shit.
Wednesday, November 15, 2023

rain gif

chicken sotanghon

Novo Amor and homemade chicken sotanghon on this rainy Wednesday šŸŒ§ļø

Lettuce Wraps.
Sunday, November 12, 2023

lettuce wraps

My mom loves the lettuce wraps at P.F. Chang’s and wants me to make them for Thanksgiving LOL. We hardly ever have traditional Thanksgiving food. I think we’re deep frying some cornish game hens this year because no one ever eats the turkey. I also accidentally bought 5 bags of turkey bone broth instead of chicken when I was doing a cleanse once, and the smell of turkey elicits my gag reflex now.

Since I’ve never made the lettuce wraps before, I found this copycat recipe and did a trial run, so I wouldn’t embarrass myself in front of all my relatives šŸ˜… I omitted the ginger (because I hate ginger) and the sriracha (because not all of my relatives have my spice tolerance).They also serve them with iceberg at the restaurant, but I got butter lettuce instead because it was less watery and messy.

Remember that episode of Punky Brewster where the girls all wanted Butter Lettuce Babies? I think Cabbage Patch Kids was copyrighted LOL. If you don’t know who Punky Brewster is, then you are too young and I am too old. Anyway, the lettuce wraps turned out great and I’ll def be making them for Thanksgiving!

PTO.
Saturday, November 11, 2023

nori snack box

My work bestie is taking PTO, so I sent her a care package with her favorite popcorn from Chicago, these cookies from NYC that she showed me on instagram, and some homemade furikake chex mix to snack on, plus a USB full of illegally downloaded movies so she can fully enjoy her well-deserved staycation.

Free Sausage.
Thursday, November 9, 2023

instacart

I instacarted 1 pack of sausage and the guy accidentally bought me 5 packs! I think he got confused because I also ordered 5 Lean Cuisines LOL. This is like the time I ordered 2 boxes of protein bars and Amazon accidentally delivered 2 cases (12 boxes!). I’m still trying to get through those protein bars 8 months later, but I’ll probably go through this free sausage pretty quickly šŸ˜†

65.
Tuesday, November 7, 2023

mom 65th birthday

It’s my mama’s 65th birthday, and all she wanted was a new iPad to watch her K-dramas and some lettuce wraps (@ P.F. Chang’s)

Bliss.
Monday, November 6, 2023

cranberry bliss bar

I love living so close to the Lansangs because sometimes I wake up to Christine dropping off some Cranberry Bliss! ‘Tis the season, y’all!

Taco Tuesday.
Tuesday, October 31, 2023

taco tuesday

Taco Tuesday, but make it spooky šŸ’€

How I Halloween.
Tuesday, October 31, 2023

spooky sangria

As I was pouring the bottle of wine into the Skull Drink Dispenser last night, Pammie was like, ā€œAre we having a party tomorrow?ā€ and I was like, ā€œNo, this is just for us.ā€ šŸ’šŸ»ā€ā™€ļø

Spooky Sangria:

  • 2 – 250 ml bottles merlot
  • 12 oz Fireball Whiskey
  • 16 oz orange juice
  • 16 oz pomegranate syrup
  • 1 – 20 oz can pineapple tidbits
  • 2 sliced limes
  • 2 sliced oranges
  • Cinnamon sticks (for garnish)

boo bark

chocolate cake skulls

Happy Halloween, y’all! Same time next year???

Meals for One.
Thursday, October 26, 2023

smart ones

I’m really looking forward to not having to cook later and microwaving this frozen dinner. What has become of my life??? I got it in the Meals for One section at Target šŸ˜…

Boo Bucket.
Tuesday, October 24, 2023

mcdonald's boo bucket

Partly because I wanted a Boo Bucket to put the candy in for the delivery guys, but mostly because I wanted Mcdonald’s. How cute is this tiny fry box?!

The Boo Bucket is smaller than I remember, but I was a lot smaller in the 80s, too 🤣

front door

Come and get it šŸŽƒšŸ«šŸ¬

Paint & Sip & Slurp.
Sunday, October 22, 2023

chel birthday

chel birthday

All Chel wanted for her birthday was to paint some pumpkins, sip some cocktails and slurp some ramen (and a sexy chef to make us dinner, but I couldn’t provide that).

chel birthday

I refilled the punch-a-bunch for Darien and the twins who also coincidentally love Halloween, BBQ and being naked.

I accidentally dropped my still-wet pumpkin towards the end of the night, so not only did I ruin Chel’s warm palette vibe, I also ruined her patio table and area rug underneath it with neon green paint! She says she was getting rid of the table and rug anyway šŸ˜…

My cup is so full. Love these girls ā™„ļø

Buzzed.
Thursday, October 19, 2023

life's better buzzed

My sister had to go into the office, so she brought me back a Best Drink EverĀ® (@ Better Buzz)

Pumpkin Spice Snack Mix.
Wednesday, October 18, 2023

pumpkin spice chex mix

I made some pumpkin spice snack mix for Chel’s birthday party this weekend, and my sister’s husband says it tastes better than my furikake chex mix! He’ll be selling it at the Otay Ranch Farmers’ Market on Tuesdays šŸ˜‚

Pumpkin Spice Snack Mix (adapted from Princess Pinky Girl)

Ingredients:

  • 1 – 12 oz box Honey Nut Chex cereal
  • 1 – 12.5 oz box Cinnamon Chex cereal
  • 2 – 6 oz bags Caramel Bugles
  • 1 – 7.44 oz bag Campfire S’mores M&Ms
  • 1 – 9.9 oz bag Reese’s Pieces
  • 1 – 20 oz bag Brach’s Autumn Mix Candy
  • 1 – 16 oz bag Pretzels
  • 2 tbsp Pumpkin Pie Spice
  • 1 tsp Vanilla Extract
  • ½ cup Brown Sugar
  • ½ cup Butter

Directions:

  1. Preheat oven to 275°.
  2. In a large foil steamer pan, mix the cereal, pretzels and Bugles.
  3. Melt butter in a glass measuring cup, and stir together melted butter with brown sugar, pumpkin pie spice, and vanilla. Pour over the dry mix. Stir to coat.
  4. Bake at 275° for 45 minutes, stirring every 15 minutes.
  5. Cool and then add the candy pieces.
  6. Store in an airtight container.
Pop Pie & Chisme.
Saturday, October 14, 2023

pop pie

I love when my sister gets her hair done, partly because her hairdresser always has new chisme, but mostly because her salon is near University Heights and she brings me home something from Pop Pie.

Friday the 13th.
Friday, October 13, 2023

friday the 13th

What better day to carve pumpkins than Friday the 13th? šŸŽƒ

beetlejuice pumpkin

I’m the ghost with the most, babe šŸ–¤

What, you don’t like Beetlejuice??? It’s OK, the flame will keep me warm at night. JK there’s a fake candle in there. You almost burn down your apartment once (OK, twice) and people don’t let you forget it. Alicia gave me a Dole Whip Candle from Disneyland and I was like, “I’m not allowed to have an open flame.” šŸ˜…

Thanks to Jessie for helping me carve my pumpkin. AKA she carved most of it while I ate s’mores and watched šŸ˜‚ It was her first time carving a pumpkin, and she loved it! She was like, “Did I just learn a new trade???”

friday the 13th

Jessie fell to the ground laughing after Christine asked if we were carving Albert Einstein 🤣 It was like when we were watching America Says and the board was ā€œFamous Mustachesā€ and one of the answers was Groucho Marx and Pammie was like, ā€œWho the hell is Groucho Marx? Richard Marxā€˜s brother???ā€ LMAO she was serious! I was eating and spit my food everywhere!

friday the 13th

My Halloween snack game is to die for šŸ’€

friday the 13th

My favorite Spicy Vodka Pasta from Jon and Vinny’s, but make it spooky šŸ¦‡šŸŽƒ

friday the 13th

I’ll pretty much find any excuse to make a charbooterie board.

Meat:

  • Salame di Parma
  • Spicy Sopressa

Cheese:

  • Sharp Cheddar (cut with a pumpkin cookie cutter)
  • Roquefort
  • Brie
  • Cranberry ChĆØvre
  • Creamy Toscano Cheese Soaked in Syrah

Fruit:

  • Blackberries
  • Oranges
  • Cornichons
  • Blueberries
  • Dried Apricots
  • Raspberries
  • Pomegranate Seeds

Extras:

Decoration:

friday the 13th

friday the 13th

And make a punch-a-bunch for the kids.

friday the 13th

And make s’mores.

friday the 13th

And witch finger pretzel rods.

friday the 13th

And use my plastic vampire teeth.

friday the 13th

And my skull pan.

Love, love, love Halloween and these girls so much šŸ–¤

Air Fryer Shrimp Tacos.
Monday, October 9, 2023

air fried shrimp tacos

If I can’t cook it in an air fryer, I don’t want it.

Fogo.
Sunday, October 8, 2023

Happy 70th birthday to my pops! (@ Fogo de Chão)

I’ve never been to a Brazilian steakhouse before, but it was everything The Mindy Project promised it would be 🤣

Nails.
Saturday, October 7, 2023

witch nails

Pammie: What are you doing?
Me: Painting these blanched almonds for my witch fingers. What does it look like I’m doing???

Raggedy Ho.
Thursday, October 5, 2023

I used to go to the Popeye’s near my apartment, and I didn’t think I went there too frequently (maybe once or twice a month), but I’d always order the same thing—a popcorn shrimp combo. One day, I was standing in line minding my own business, and the dude who always helps me sees me standing there and shouts over the people ahead of me, “Popcorn shrimp combo???” Embarrassing! 😳 Like, first of all, lower your voice, and second of all, yes, of course I’d like a popcorn shrimp combo 🤣

I was getting my hair cut in Manhattan Beach, and the new receptionist and I were trying to figure out where we knew each other from, and she was like, “I used to work at Popeye’s! Is that where I’ve seen you???” I guess I went there more frequently than I thought šŸ˜…

Another time, I ordered Thai from a nearby restaurant and went to pick it up at the wrong place. They were like, “Are you sure you ordered from here???” and I checked my online order again, and I was, in fact, at the wrong restaurant. I haven’t been back there since. I already can’t go to this other Thai restaurant near my apartment, because the last time I ate there, they tried to kill me šŸ˜… My pad thai was extra spicy (I asked for 5/10 heat and it was more like a gazillion/10). I had to keep asking for more water during my meal and the waiters seemed to enjoy my pain.

This is why I pay extra to doordash and do contactless delivery… partly so I can suffer in the comfort of my own home, but mostly because I don’t have to put a bra on to get my food šŸ˜…

Good thing there’s hella Starbucks nearby because now I have to try this apple croissant.

Air Fried.
Wednesday, October 4, 2023

I saw this video and bought some oven-baked cheese, air fried it and ate it with marinara sauce. It was like eating pizza without the dough! I almost grabbed some black olives and turkey pep.

What else can I air fry???

Sweet Potato Avocado Toast.
Wednesday, October 4, 2023

sweet potato toast

I picked up some Roots Farm Fresh Sweet Potato Toast to go low-carb, because I had Taco Bell three times this week šŸ˜… I was devastated when they took my beloved shredded chicken burrito off their menu, and they now have shredded chicken rolled tacos! And brought back nacho fries. So I had to get both three days in a row, obviously.

Update 10/7/2023: My sister made the mistake of asking me what I wanted for lunch, and I was like, “TACO BELL!” When we went through the drive-thru, the guy told us the shredded chicken rolled tacos were limited edition only and they no longer have them *cries in Spanish*

Air Fried Chicken Wings.
Tuesday, October 3, 2023

I was gifted an air fryer by someone who replaced theirs with one of those 3-in-1 kitchen appliances that’s a microwave, air fryer and convection oven in one. I air fried these chicken wings for lunch and they were sooo good and crispy. Who needs Buffalo Wild Wings??? Or as Jay calls them, BBW 🤣

Wonder.
Monday, September 25, 2023

Shi and I used to hang out all the time at my old apartment in SD and eat so bad. She’s seen me eat a whole pizza by myself (in my defense, it was thin crust! LOL), and I’ve seen her eat an entire pound cake in one sitting (multiple times!). We were also in our 20s, and our metabolism was much faster back then šŸ˜… We used to make these sinful cheesecake-stuffed strawberries, and I kept seeing these Wonder Monday ads on all my socials for low-carb, low-sugar cheesecakes, so I ordered some, whipped up a few in my stand mixer, piped them into fresh strawberries and dipped them in heart-healthy dark chocolate! They tasted like heaven.

Cheese & Crackers.
Sunday, September 24, 2023

brƻlƩed brie

Partly because I ate my weight in pizza yesterday, but mostly because I saw this brĆ»lĆ©ed brie on instagram, I made this low-carb platter with apples and Ella’s Flats.

Eating the seed crackers alone felt like I was eating straight up bird food, but the brĆ»lĆ©ed brie and apples were *chef’s kiss*

BOP.
Saturday, September 23, 2023

chat

justin homage pizza

Justin Gaspar from Hommage Bakehouse (who won Hulu’s Baker’s Dozen) made pizzas during the party and they were so good. He liked my Boo Berry Krispie Treats and his wife was the first person ever to compliment me on my Original Berf shirt, too, so they’re good people šŸ˜†

gender reveal

We came for the pizza, but stayed for the gender reveal!

sonogram

It has been a hard IVF journey for my dear friend after battling breast cancer, and Jessie surprised all of us by telling us that the surrogacy’s pregnancy took and baby boy Cuevas is coming March 2024!

We are simply overjoyed 🄹

Be More Pacific.
Saturday, September 23, 2023

I love Filipino Kare Kare, and this restaurant makes it with BRISKET. I have to try it! BRB, looking up flights to Houston.

Boo Berry.
Friday, September 22, 2023

booberry krispie treats

Contrary to popular belief, I call Jessie “BB” because she’s loved Boo Berry cereal since we were kids. She and Abe have a legit pizza oven in their backyard and are having a long overdue pizza party tomorrow, so I made these Boo Berry Krispie Treats to bring.

Ramen.
Tuesday, September 19, 2023

immi ramen

Before the incident, my sister’s husband said I used to eat like I was high all the time. Pop Tarts, Lunchables, Takis, Cup-O-Noodles… Pretty much anything you can doordash after 10pm or buy at the gas station LOL. I used to eat dinner really late and fast food is the only option available at that time. Plus I just genuinely liked processed food and had access to free soda and vending machines at work. I haven’t gone into the office in over three years, I don’t drink soda anymore, and I eat dinner at 6pm now šŸ‘µšŸ¼

I found these plant-based ramen noodles that don’t exceed my sodium intake for the day. Apolo Ohno is an investor, if that helps sway you at all. I added some chili garlic crisp, green onions, tofu, crushed red pepper and an egg to jazz it up.

I don’t even know who I am anymore eating plant-based food, having dinner before the sun goes down, and saying shit like, “jazz it up” ĀÆ\_(惄)_/ĀÆ

My friend asked if I was going vegan with all this plant-based bullshit, but I’m just trying to find healthier alternatives and cut back on the salt. I could never give up BBQ. Gotta risk it for the brisket!

Flamin’ Hot.
Sunday, September 17, 2023

flaming hot keto puffs

I love Flamin’ Hot anything. I used to eat a bag of hot fries from the gas station every time I’d drive from LA to SD. I tried these Flaming Hot Keto Puffs and they were a good alternative! Def reminded me of a time in my life I now refer to as BS (before stroke) šŸ˜… I miss eating whatever I want!

the sweetest thing anal leakage chips gif gif   the sweetest thing anal leakage chips gif gif
the sweetest thing anal leakage chips gif gif   the sweetest thing anal leakage chips gif gif

Every time I eat “healthy” chips, I think of this scene from The Sweetest Thing 🤣

Magnolia Bakery x Ess-a-Bagel.
Wednesday, September 13, 2023

banana pudding cream cheese bagel

I usually have half a Dave’s Killer Bread Cinnamon Raisin Remix Bagel in the morning with my sugar-free cold brew and unsweetened almond milk (boring!). That’s how my sister’s husband knows I’m awake—he can smell my bagel toasting (sometimes at 8:30, sometimes at 9:30… but if my boss is reading this, always before my shift starts at 9am).

Two of my favorite things combined: banana pudding from Magnolia Bakery (I’ve had it in LA, but they’re famous in NYC) and Ess-a-Bagel (we tried it on our last trip to NYC and loved it). When I saw that two iconic NYC eateries had a collabo, I knew I had to get it, and ordering from Goldbelly was cheaper than flying to New York šŸ˜…

I’ve never eaten a plain bagel before (they’re just dyed yellow), but anything slathered with banana pudding schmear and nilla wafers will taste good! It was perfect šŸ‘ŒšŸ¼ (I ate plant-based spam yesterday. I think I can afford some carbs and sugar.)

If you think it’s too sweet and dessert-y to be a bagel, you’re wrong and IDK how we’re friends ĀÆ\_(惄)_/ĀÆ

miss congeniality bagel schmear gif   miss congeniality bagel schmear gif
miss congeniality bagel schmear gif   miss congeniality bagel schmear gif

Also, I can’t say “schmear” without thinking of this scene from Miss Congeniality 🤣

Spamsilog.
Tuesday, September 12, 2023

spamsilog

I haven’t had spamsilog (spam with rice and eggs for you non-Filipinos) since before the incident. It’s too processed, has too much fat, too much sodium and too many calories. I saw this video of this plant-based spam, so I had to try it. I ate it with rice (I’m eating plant-based spam, you want me to give up carbs, too?) an egg (to increase my good cholestorol levels) and a side of Datu Puti vinegar (because I’m Filipino as fuck).

I don’t usually like vegan food that’s pretending to be meat (I’d rather just eat vegetables), but I do have the occasional Impossible burger when my friend is observing Lent. But this was a great alternative for people who love spam!

Wrap.
Monday, September 11, 2023

salad wrap

I followed this recipe, except I omitted the kale (I don’t like raw kale) and sesame seeds (who the fuck has sesame seeds in their pantry??? It made me think of this video even though I totally have molasses LOL), added some crumbled turkey bacon, croutons, red onion, toasted quinoa and grape tomatoes, and used store-bought blue cheese dressing because it’s what I had on hand (and ain’t nobody got time to make their own dressing!). Okay so I didn’t really follow her recipe, just prepare any salad like you normally would and wrap it in a tortilla. I used to order a salad wrap at the cafe at work when I’d go in, and this reminded me so much of it. Sooo good!

TikTok Feta Fried Egg Taco.
Friday, September 8, 2023

feta fried egg taco

I made the TikTok Feta Fried Egg Taco for lunch and it was sooo good. Before you come at me, I used a Carb Balance Tortilla šŸ™„

Lolita’s.
Monday, September 4, 2023

lolita's

Lunch with my favorite Mexicans (@ Lolita’s)

I haven’t seen Alicia since before the incident, but she sent me flowers in the hospital and checks in regularly šŸ’•

She finally used the Disney gift card I gave her for her 40th birthday and stayed at the Grand Californian! She brought me back a Dole Whip Candle. Smells so good. Love me some dole whip. And I love that all the gifts she brings me are food-related LOL I have a Mickey Mouse soft pretzel magnet from her on my fridge in LA from that one time I was supposed to meet her at California Adventure, but got into an accident on the way there and totaled my car šŸ˜… I kept all my important documents stuck to the fridge under that magnet, even my car registration renewal that I forgot about and got pulled over in DTLA the first day it expired šŸ˜…

Jessie was like, “They drove down from Murrietta, and you guys just went to Lolita’s?” (I go to Lolita’s maybe once a week LOL). She wanted Hans & Harry’s afterward, so that’s why we picked Lolita’s in Bonita. You can’t go to SD without getting good Mexican food and having a fruit strudel from Hans & Harry’s!

Spicy.
Thursday, August 31, 2023

jon and vinny's spicy fusilli

Nori was telling me how much she loved Bakar’s Hell N Back song, and I told her I first heard it in an NFL Shop commercial and used it in my IG story when I made Jon and Vinny’s Spicy Fusilli alla Vodka pasta when we were stuck at home during covid.

I haven’t had pasta since the day before the incident when Nori and I had lunch at Olive Garden! We both haven’t eaten there since. It’s like how we avoid eating at Ocean Diner, because every time we would go there for lunch, someone would get fired at work LOL.

Since I had some bloodwork done this morning, I thought today would be a good day to make that pasta again. I had to instacart some vodka because they don’t drink around here, and you can’t make vodka sauce without any vodka. I only needed two tablespoons, so now I have a handle of vodka to celebrate with when I get my bloodwork results back.

I forgot to get tomato paste, so I had to instacart a second order. Since my sister’s elevator is still broken, I took the stairs all the way down to the bottom when I got the delivery notification and was like where the fuck is my order??? I went back upstairs and chatted with the idiot driver who delivered it to the wrong house and put it in their garage! Then, while I was on my laptop chatting with instacart’s customer service to get a refund, I forgot about my garlic bread in the oven and burned it. I was so frazzled. I use instacart so I don’t have to inconvenience anyone, and my sister ended up having to drive me to the grocery store for tomato paste and more garlic bread. Maybe I’ll drink that vodka now LOL I’m all riled up!

I finally made dinner and Pammie and her husband loved it. It was just as good as I remember. I guess it was worth all that trouble šŸ˜…

Update 9/1: I got my bloodwork results back, and my A1C went up 1/10 of a point and my white blood cell count is elevated which my doctor said she’ll talk to me about during our appointment next week. I think I’ll drink that vodka now šŸ˜“

French.
Tuesday, August 29, 2023

Yvonne?! That’s a french ass name!

I’ve had Food Network on in the background as I’ve been working, and I always thought “star anise” was pronounced “star a-nees,” but I’ve heard both Chef Zakarian and Chef Symon call it “star a-nis” today, and I was like, “Why are they saying it like ‘anus’?” LOL. But I googled it and it is pronounced like anus 🤣

We used to sell these sabatier steak knives when I worked at Red Envelope, and I called them “saba-teer” for months until a customer pronounced it “suh-ba-tee-ay,” and I was like, “These knives are french?! How come no one told me???”

🤣🤣🤣

Cronut.
Monday, August 28, 2023

cronut

I went to Vegas partly because I needed a change of scenery, but mostly because I had to try August’s cronut flavor of the month (@ Dominique Ansel Las Vegas)

Parking at Caesars was $25, so this donut cost over $30, but it was worth it šŸ˜‹

Salad.
Wednesday, August 16, 2023

cobb salad

Nori and I used to frequent Mendocino Farms for lunch, but parking was always a nightmare at The Point, and we haven’t gone back since there was a romaine shortage and they substituted shredded lettuce in our Modern Caesar 2.0 salads. We’re petty like that šŸ˜‚

What I miss most about Mendo is the Superfood Krunchies they top all their salads with. I recently found these Cereausly Crispies on Amazon (ain’t nobody got time to toast their own quinoa!), so I had to get some and make myself a salad.

I accidentally forgot to update my address on instacart, and all my salad accoutrements got delivered to my parents’ house. They’re on a European cruise right now, so my sister had to drive my ass to their house to pick up my perishables. That’s what I get for trying to be healthy šŸ˜…

Mom’s Recipe.
Saturday, August 5, 2023

crumbl

They had my most favorite cookie flavor and the first Crumbl cookie I ever tried (Mom’s Recipe), so I had to.

Tacos and Cock.
Tuesday, August 1, 2023

tacos and cock

Do they serve both of these things??? Asking for a friend.

What-A-Burger.
Monday, July 31, 2023

what-a-burger

We went to Texas for a wedding once and decided to try What-A-Burger. We were all almost done with our food, and Shi hadn’t gotten hers yet and all she ordered was cheese fries! When they finally brought out her order, it was a box of fries with a slice of cheese still in the wrapper on the side šŸ¤¦šŸ»ā€ā™€ļø

My boyfriend at the time got a speeding ticket driving back to SD (we were in our twenties and too poor to fly), Chel and her then-boyfriend got into a fight while we were there, and the couple who got married are now divorced. The whole trip was terrible LOL.

I also have to agree with crzylop77. You get better burgers from AM/PM 🤣 I’d choose In-N-Out over What-A-Burger every time, but as far as burger chains go, I like Shake Shack the best.

Happee Birthdae, Harry.
Monday, July 31, 2023

happee birthdae harry potter cake

Partly because it’s Harry Potter’s birthday, but mostly because I wanted some chocolate cake šŸ˜†

National Chicken Wing Day.
Saturday, July 29, 2023

wings

If you thought I was gonna have wings on National Chicken Wing Day, you weren’t wrong (@ Buffalo Wild Wings)

DTF.
Thursday, July 20, 2023

xlb dinner

Who needs Din Tai Fung reservations???

I ordered these dumplings from MƬLƠ (if you advertise on instagram using a celebrity endorser and offer free shipping if I spend a certain amount, I can be easily swayed to buy anything).

I also made some cucumber salad, garlic green beans and sesame noodles (Pammie’s favorite) in case our dinner wasn’t Asian enough.

Stain.
Wednesday, July 19, 2023

mattress stain

mattress

I was working on my bed (also where I ate my breakfast and lunch today LOL) and I thought I kicked my pill box from my side table, but I was like, “Why do my legs feel wet?” and I turned around and straight up gasped. I kicked my protein shake (which I pour over ice and drink out of a Starbucks cup with a straw so it feels like I’m having an iced coffee from there) and it spilled all over my white sheets and seeped into the mattress.

Luckily, I already had this stain remover from the last time I spilled at Pammie’s house, and it lifted it right out šŸ˜… IDK what to tell you, I love tummy time and I’m a clumsy ass bitch ĀÆ\_(惄)_/ĀÆ

Grimace.
Friday, July 14, 2023

mcdonald's

I’ve been looking forward to having Grimace’s birthday meal all week, but the Mcdonald’s nearby stopped selling it already (I had a to do some bloodwork today, so of course I got a cheeseburger and fries afterward).

Cronuts.
Saturday, July 8, 2023

dominique ansel blueberry jam graham cracker cronut

I once went to Dominique Ansel Bakery in NYC, walked right in and some guy was like, ā€œMa’am, there’s a lineā€ and I looked and there was a whole ass line outside the bakery 🤣 I guess I wasn’t the only one who wanted a cronut 20 years ago! When I saw there was a Dominique Ansel inside Caesars Palace, I had to brave the 105° weather and go.

Their July cronut is blueberry jam with graham cracker ganache and it was sooo good! The best cronut I’ve had before this was at Kettle Glazed in Hollywood, but this one knocked it out of the park. I mean, Dominique Ansel invented the cronut

Airport Fries.
Thursday, July 6, 2023

the counter

me: Are the fries at The Counter skinny or big?
Dennis: They’re skinny like you.
me: Skinny fries are my favorite! Okay I’m not gonna go to dinner with you guys when we get to Vegas. It’ll be after 9pm and I’ll be sleeping LOL. I’m just gonna grab something at the airport.
Dennis: I lied before. The Counter’s fries are big. Now you have to eat dinner with us!
me: Joke’s on you. I like ALL fries!

I love a good french fry, and Eater came out with The Top 10 French Fries in LA. I’ve been to 3/10 of those places (Majordomo, RĆ©publique, and Father’s Office). Anyone want to eat some french fries with me???

Independence Day.
Wednesday, July 5, 2023

strawberry pretzel salad

I’ve always wanted to make this Strawberry Pretzel Salad (“a favorite dessert at many white trash gatherings” according to this website). It’s now a favorite dessert at Asian gatherings, and I’ll def be making it again!

smores cookie bars

These S’mores Cookie Bars lets you have s’mores (my favorite) without the campfire.

fruit

I cut up some fresh fruit to confuse my body.

fireworks

Pammie’s rooftop is my favorite place to watch fireworks. She has a perfect view of the Olympic Training Center.

Hot Dog Summer.
Tuesday, July 4, 2023

nathan's hot dog eating contest

…or how I start every 4th of July.

Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest was delayed for 2 hours because of the NYC rain, but I eventually got to watch Joey Chestnut win his 16th mustard belt 🌭

Levain.
Thursday, June 22, 2023

levain los angeles

My favorite bakery from NYC opens this weekend in LA (@ Levain)

Now I don’t have to pack my foodsaver to bring home fresh cookies the next time I go to New York 🤣 Their chocolate chip walnut cookie will change your life!

Banana Nut Bread.
Tuesday, June 20, 2023

banana bread

My mom asked me to make her banana nut bread with her ripe bananas, and since my sister’s husband has been asking me to make banana bread for months, I made him a loaf, too.

I used to make mini loaves and bring them to work. Here’s some actual footage of the time I caught my old coworker, Justin, in his office going to town on this mini loaf that was supposed to be for him and his wife LOL:

laura sandwich gif

Don’t let The Great Banana Bread Disaster of 2009 fool you. I make a mean ass banana bread.

Best Ever Banana Nut Bread with Streusel Topping Recipe (banana bread recipe adapted from The Baking ChocolaTess and streusel recipe from Yummy Addiction):

Banana Nut Bread Ingredients:

  • ½ cup butter, softened
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 2 eggs beaten
  • 1 ½ cups flour
  • 1 tsp. baking soda
  • ½ tsp. salt
  • 1 cup mashed bananas (about 3)
  • ½ cup sour cream
  • 1 tsp. vanilla
  • ½ cup chopped walnuts

Streusel Ingredients:

  • 3 tbsp. flour
  • ¼ cup brown sugar
  • ¼ tsp. cinnamon
  • 2 tbsp. unsalted butter, slightly softened and cut into pieces
  • ¼ cup chopped walnuts

Instructions:

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Grease a 9-inch loaf pan. Cut a piece of parchment paper and put it on the bottom of the pan (for easy removal).
  3. In a large bowl, cream the butter with sugar until light and fluffy.
  4. Add in the eggs and mix well.
  5. Whisk together the flour, baking soda, and salt, then add into the butter mixture and combine together.
  6. Add the sour cream, bananas, and vanilla and stir well to incorporate, but don’t overmix.
  7. Stir in chopped walnuts.
  8. Pour into prepared pan.
  9. Add the flour, brown sugar, and cinnamon in a medium bowl and mix until combined. Cut in the butter using your fingers or a pastry blender, until it resembles coarse crumbs. Stir in chopped walnuts. Sprinkle the streusel topping evenly over the batter.
  10. Bake for 50-60 minutes.
  11. Cool for 10 minutes and then turn the loaf out onto a rack. Remove the parchment paper and wrap the loaf in saran wrap to keep it moist once it’s room temperature.
In-Yun.
Monday, June 19, 2023

korean snack box

I didn’t know that liking your husband would hurt this much.

We watched a Korean movie (@ AMC La Jolla), and I got us some Korean snacks to eat while we cried. They even referenced one of my favorite movies, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. If you’ve never seen it, these two people erase each other from their memories after a painful breakup, and they still end up finding each other again. You can’t fight fate…

Jessie was off today for Juneteenth, so she invited us into her Korean world LOL. IDK guys, the Padres are opening next season against the Dodgers in South Korea, and she might go there solo and not come back ĀÆ\_(惄)_/ĀÆ

Happy Father’s Day.
Sunday, June 18, 2023

seneca

seneca

dole whip

All my dad wanted for Father’s Day was a beer on a rooftop (@ Seneca)

The dole whip at the food and craft market below was a bonus. Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there!

BBQ Boom.
Saturday, June 17, 2023

20 Essential BBQ Restaurants in LA, Spring 2023

I’ve been to 3/20 places on Eater’s 20 Essential BBQ Restaurants in LA, Spring 2023 list (Bludso’s, Slab & Maple Block Meat Company). Anyone want to try the other 17 with me??? I also have a BBQ bucket list if you feel like traveling.

Pete’s Seafood and Sandwich.
Friday, June 16, 2023

lobster roll

Craving a lobster roll ever since Yelp sent me their 2023 Top Lobster Roll Spots in Every State list. This place in North Park did not disappoint (@ Pete’s Seafood and Sandwich)

Booty Shorts and Burritos.
Thursday, June 15, 2023

dtf

We paid our respects at Jocelyn’s mom’s viewing tonight. No one wore booty shorts (@ Glen Abbey)

Hopefully the seƱorita bread we brought made up for us not voting for her for homecoming queen 20-something years ago. It felt like high school all over again (I’m still hanging out with the same girls and I had a carne asada burrito for dinner LOL).

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