» 2024 » January
Holiday Weight.
Wednesday, January 31, 2024
friends - joey ross - holiday weight   friends - joey ross - holiday weight

I had a doctor’s appointment this morning, and I’ve gained a few since I last saw my PCP in person almost a year ago. Granted, I last saw her a couple months after the strokes when I had dropped a ton of weight because I was scared to eat a carb, plus it’s after the holidays now! I’m still skinnier than I was before the strokes, but she didn’t see me till after I lost all that weight. I planned on eating my way through Phoenix and Nashville in the next couple months, but she scheduled another appointment in the beginning of May to check on my progress. She said I should be doing at least 150 minutes of exercise a week. I’m like, “But that’s 150 more than I normally do.” 😅

Tuesday, January 30, 2024

jt free show

Welp, it’s officially EOD in NYC, and I didn’t win tickets to Justin Timberlake’s free show. I guess I’ll be an adult and go to my doctor’s appointment and work tomorrow 😅 I think because we had to put our zip in when we entered, they didn’t think a girl from the west coast would go to a show in NYC at a moment’s notice, but they doubt my commitment to Sparkle Motion Justin Timberlake.

Monte Cristo.
Tuesday, January 30, 2024

monte cristo

I was craving a Monte Cristo and couldn’t find a good one to doordash, so I made it myself 😋

Sunday, January 28, 2024


…or my pops being extra and changing into this outfit after the Niners won tonight’s game LOL. I was only rooting for Detroit because I wanted to see a real lion on the field at the Superbowl.

BRB crying 😭

Sunday, January 28, 2024

tina fey money dance gif

I had a fraud alert this morning (some asshole tried to buy $200 worth of stuff with my credit card at so they canceled my card and issued me a new one. I was trying to pre-pay for my prescriptions at CVS, so I had to use another credit card, which I never use. I still had to activate it, so I went to do that on Chase and so I logged in and was like, “Why is there so much money in this account?” I looked at my transactions, and I guess I got a raise and bonus on Friday 😅 I wasn’t expecting anything since I was on medical leave for half of last year.

Sunday, January 28, 2024

providence check in

Waiting until the eleventh hour to check in to my doc appointment in case I win tickets to Justin Timberlake’s free show in NYC that day and have to cancel it 😅

titus praying gif

Berry 1st Birthday.
Saturday, January 27, 2024

jayla and janae's berry 1st birthday

Double trouble (@ Montevalle Recreation Center)

Today was the twins’ first birthday party, so we came butt early to help my cousin and her daughter (the twins’ mom) set up. I doordashed some Better Buzz Coffee to wake our asses up.


The other coolest set of twins at the party.

jayla and janae's berry 1st birthday

I’m a cat, duh ✌🏼

jayla and janae's berry 1st birthday

As we were waiting in line to get our faces painted, Chel was like, “Are you wearing perfume? What smells so good?” While I was wearing my Pure Seduction Victoria’s Secret Body Mist LOL, I was like, “I think you’re smelling the churros, dude.” 🤣 We were steps away from the delicious churro cart our cousin hired for the party. Also, I’m pretty sure Chel and I were the oldest people in the face painter line (JK, my sister got the Deathly Hallows Harry Potter symbol painted on her arm—she’s 13 months older than me 😆).

jayla and janae's berry 1st birthday

jayla and janae's berry 1st birthday

This party was so on brand, my little graphic designer heart was bursting at every little detail 🍓

Saturday, January 27, 2024

So if I get jealous, I can’t help it
I want every bit of you, I guess I’m selfish
It’s bad for my mental, but I can’t fight it, when
You’re out lookin’ like you do, but you can’t hide it, no

Currently on rotation ❤️

Friday, January 26, 2024

My sister and her husband were on some “dinner playlist” music channel on TV, and her husband was like, “Why does this sound like a song Mayan would like?” and my sister looked up and it was Lord Huron. She was like, “Yep. She loves this band.” What can I say, I’m partial to sad indie music ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

One time, we were at a Lord Huron show, and my sister was like, “I can’t find this band on Instagram” (she was trying to tag them in her story), and I look over at her phone and she had typed, “Lady Huron” LOL. I was like, “You know it’s ‘Lord Huron’ right?” 🤣

Friday, January 26, 2024

the plaza reed diffuser

When we stayed at The Plaza in NYC, I kept commenting on how good it smelled. I found out they sell their signature scent online, and I had to get it. Now it smells like The Plaza up in this bitch.

Friday, January 26, 2024

I’ll just be here for the rest of the day.

bear watching tv gif

Nori messaged me earlier and was like, “Still busy?” I’ve been super busy at work this week, because I’m still catching up from being on vacation and being out sick from my tummy ache last week. I was like, “Yeah, don’t they know I’m trying to win JT tickets over here?!” 😅

Friday, January 26, 2024


He said, “baby, ” that’s what he called me, “I love you”Every single word you say makes me feel some type of wayIt’s the thought of you that slightly scares meBut it takes my breath away, forget what I was gonna sayThe day that I met you, I started dreamingNow I write ’em down if I remember in the morning time

I just want a daddy who sends me songs that make him think of me 😆 I told Jessie to tell Nixon (who’s in middle school), it doesn’t get easier in your 40s 😅

Thursday, January 25, 2024

pill organizer

I got this new pill organizer because adulting.

I also just entered the lottery to win tickets for Justin Timberlake’s free show in NYC next week, even though I have a doctor’s appointment in LA that day, so I’m not adulting too hard 😅

Wolf Moon.
Thursday, January 25, 2024

wolves howling at moon

First full moon of 2024 ✨

Charge those crystals and harness that energy under that Wolf Moon, y’all!

Wednesday, January 24, 2024

innings festival 2024

I was fine getting general admission tickets, but Pammie insisted we treat ourselves to VIP passes. YOLO ✊🏼 Is it February yet???

Wednesday, January 24, 2024


My friend tested positive for Covid, and she thinks she got it from a meeting she had to attend at UCSD in person last week. My sister had to go into the office today for a meeting with executives that are flying in from all over the country! Her boss has a cold and is knowingly going in sick for that meeting and also a team building event at an escape room LOL. Like, what’s more important than your health??? Certainly not your job! Luckily, my boss is a germophobe, and I haven’t had to go in the office since 2020.

I’ve somehow managed to dodge Covid for 4 years, even though I’ve been exposed a couple times. Should I add that to my Tinder bio? “Never gotten Covid. Never seen a Star Wars movie.” Just kidding (I’m not on Tinder).

Anytime I say I’ve never had Covid, my sister (who got Covid on vacation in Hawaii despite masking up and sanitizing everything all the time) likes to remind me that I had two strokes last year. Touché, bitch. Tou-fucking-ché 😅

M & R.
Monday, January 22, 2024

knick knacks

My parents have these shelves of knick knacks that they keep the phone chargers on, and as we were checking up on their house while they’re away on their cruise (not sure what we were checking for as they have an alarm system and cameras), I was staring at these little cups on the shelves. “B” & “S” for my parents, Ben & Shirley, “P” & “D” for my sister, Pammie and her husband, Dennis, and “M” & “R”… The “M” was for Marion, but what the hell was the “R” for? My sister saw me looking at them and was like, “R for Rocky!” Oh, duh. Of course my mom would get one for our beloved dog who died five years ago LOL.

Monday, January 22, 2024

rice cooker


My sister has a fancy ass rice cooker, and Christine sent us home yesterday with some homemade sinigang that was perfect for this rainy day.

I’ve never made rice in this cooker before, and I was like, “How do you know when it’s done?” She was like, “It plays a little song.” I was like, “I’ve been in my bedroom for the past half hour. IDK if it played the song yet.” I open it and it’s still a little wet on the bottom. I wasn’t sure if it wasn’t done yet, or if I put too much water (my rice always ends up notoriously mushy, which is why I hardly ever make it). But then I closed the lid, and it said “3 MINUTES TILL COMPLETION,” and I’ve been laughing for a million years because I’m a child.

Sunday, January 21, 2024

crab hut chamango

Chamangos and chisme (@ Crab Hut)

The girls were supposed to come over today, and I was going to smoke my first brisket, but I’m still scared to eat BBQ, so we just hit up good ol’ Crab Hut. I used to go here so much, they had my picture on the wall. I was the Duchess of Crab Hut on Yelp and the Mayor of Crab Hut on Foursquare LOL. Not much has changed about this place, but they now tack on an automatic 18% service fee no matter how small your party is. I hate when restaurants do that. I’m already a good tipper, but I don’t like to be forced to tip. Also, I’m not gonna add an additional tip if I’m already paying an extra 18%. Does my waiter even get this service fee or does it line the owner’s pockets??? I also hate it when restaurants charge an automatic “health surcharge” on top of your bill to pay for their employees’ healthcare. I’ve only seen it done in LA. Like, I love you, République, but I’m pretty sure I’m already overpaying for this kouign amann without your additional 3% health surcharge. Don’t even get me started on alimony (I don’t believe spousal support should exist if you’re no longer spouses. All of my girlfriends who are married make more than their husbands. All of them. Separate from child support, they shouldn’t have to pay them a single dime if they ever get divorced. Ok that’s the end of my rant 😅).

Southern Hospitality.
Sunday, January 21, 2024

Flights booked ✔️

It’s my first time going to Nashville, so of course I made a pinterest board of all the places I want to go there. Anything I missed???

Kevin Garrett moved to Nashville a few months ago, so I’m hoping he’s playing somewhere in town that weekend. I love going to live shows in other cities.

Friday, January 19, 2024

We were talking about how Ice Cube is exposing Jay-Z and saying he’s worse than Diddy, and how no one is safe. Seriously, nothing better come out about Young the Giant 🤣

Collector’s Item.
Friday, January 19, 2024

shattered iphone

I got a new phone today, because I shattered my screen last week when I was talking shit about Kylie Jenner 😅 I could’ve just replaced my screen like the last time I shattered it, but they’re on the iPhone 15 now and mine was a 10. I was due for a new phone LOL. Plus this new one has 1 TB of space, while my old one had 256 GB and the additional cloud space I pay extra monthly for has been full for 2 years 😅

S/O to the guy who helped me at Apple Otay Ranch and told me he liked my shirt. I was wearing my Original Berf shirt, and I love when people get the reference. I was like, “Thanks, it’s a collector’s item,” and he laughed and laughed and I left the store with a new phone and the biggest smile on my face.

Maybe more people will get the reference now that The Bear has swept the Emmy’s, Golden Globes and Critics’ Choice Awards.

Side Chick.
Friday, January 19, 2024


Friday, January 19, 2024

steel cut oats

My sister’s husband was like, “What you making for breakfast?” and I was like, “Steel cut oats with bananas.” He was like, “That’s some middle-aged shit.”

I sprinkled some cinnamon on top because it’s naturally anti-inflammatory for some added sweetness.

This is 42, y’all.

Another Lifetime.
Thursday, January 18, 2024
waitress the musical - goodbye gif
waitress the musical - goodbye gif
waitress the musical - goodbye gif
waitress the musical - goodbye gif

BRB crying.

Dark Days.
Thursday, January 18, 2024


Petite Céréale.
Thursday, January 18, 2024

croissant cereal in staub bowl

I’ve been on a juice cleanse for the past few days in preparation for my bloodwork this morning, so I celebrated eating solid foods again with this $50 cereal we picked up in Brooklyn last weekend.

Come What May.
Thursday, January 18, 2024

Forbidden love is like my favorite trope, and if you’ve never seen Moulin Rouge!, Christian (a writer) and Satine (the star of the Moulin Rouge) are secretly in love, but they need the duke to invest in the club to keep it afloat, and the duke wants Satine, so she pretends to be in love with him. Christian gets jealous and writes this song for Satine to sing in the show so whenever they sing it, it means they still love each other, and my heart bursts every time I hear it ♥️ Also, Ewan Mcgregor has the voice of a goddamn angel, and I’m still salty that he was robbed of an oscar nom in 2002. That is all.

Wednesday, January 17, 2024

crystal altar

tarot planner

I used to never believe in all this woo woo bullshit, but now look at my tarot-planning, crystal-charging, sound-bathing, chakra-aligning ass 😅 I blame LA. And the universe.

Wednesday, January 17, 2024

pressed juicery cleanse

Doing a little preemptive juice cleanse before my doctor’s appointment. The holidays and my special relationship with BBQ does not bode well for my upcoming blood tests this week 😅 (Yes, I know your A1C levels go back 3 months. Just let me).

Empire State of Mind.
Tuesday, January 16, 2024

I usually like to let my birthday pass without much fanfare (one year, Shi was like, “Am I just supposed to sit across from you at dinner and not acknowledge it’s your birthday?!”). I spent my last birthday in the hospital, so I decided to celebrate this trip around the sun.

A lot of iconic NYC eateries have since opened in LA (Roberta’s, Levain Bakery, Halal Guys, Langer’s Deli, Shake Shack, and Magnolia Bakery among others), but there’s still lots of places to try over here!

let's watch horror movies shirt

I have TSA pre-check because of my global entry enrollment, but my boots set off the metal detectors, so I had to take off my shoes and run them through the x-ray. I was wearing my Let’s Watch Horror Movies shirt, and I was like, “Are you sure it wasn’t the chainsaw on my shirt that set it off?” but no one was amused by my joke 😅

We took the red eye to NYC and got there at five in the morning. We flew JetBlue Mint so we could comfortably get some shut-eye on our overnight flight.

Actual footage of us in first class:

wonka premium economy gif

Sidenote: IDK why it bothers me so much that Timotheé Chalamet is dating Kylie Jenner. That’s a straight up lie, I know exactly why it bothers me. I’ve loved everything I’ve ever seen Timotheé Chalamet in, and I can’t stand the Kardashians/Jenners. Plus, I was so annoyed at the Golden Globes, Kieran Culkin (who won best actor in a drama series for Succession) didn’t even have seats with his wife, while Kylie was sitting front and center at Timotheé’s table. Like who even are you? I’m such a hater 😅

While I was laying flat, I heard something fall and didn’t think anything of it till we were deboarding the plane, when I was looking for my phone and couldn’t find it. I had already put the seat back up and my phone was stuck between the seat and the mechanism that makes the seat fold into a bed. Needless to say, my screen was shattered when I was able to get it out 😅 That’s what I get for talking shit about Kylie Jenner LOL.

night cap

We ordered some night caps before snoozing on the plane. I got their signature cocktail (Mint Condition), while Pammie got a chamomile tea and a virgin bloody mary LOL. I’ve never had a bloody mary with no vodka before!

plaza hotel nyc

Home for the weekend (The Plaza)

Partly because we got 40,000 Southwest points for booking this hotel, but mostly because Macauley Culkin stayed here in Home Alone 2.

Me: How much for the Kevin McCallister suite?
Internet: Nearly five grand a night.
Me: I’ll just book the cheapest room they have available, thank yew.

This is like the first time I went to NYC twenty years ago and went to Supreme to get something for Julz, and was like, “How much for this Nike necklace?” (it was just a dunk on a silver ball chain) and the guy was like, “two fifty,” and I was like, “$2.50? I’ll take two!” and the guy was like, “two hundred fifty,” and I was like, “Oh, I’ll take none then.” 😅

grimace crocs

I brought my Grimace Crocs I got for Christmas in case this hotel was too fancy 😅


Bagels for breakfast (@ Ess-A-Bagel)

We went here last time we were in NYC, and the bagels were sooo good. I also grabbed a bagel and iced coffee at Skyline Deli and Grill in Brooklyn, and it was just as good! New York really knows their shit when it comes to bagels.

tarot cards

“You brought your tarot cards, but you didn’t bring any winter clothes???”

I run hot, so I packed pretty light. I just brought 4 pairs of warm leggings, socks, a nice tank top blouse for Moulin Rouge, 3 days of t-shirts, a pair of boots, my winter coat with the faux-fur lined hood, a beanie and some gloves. It’s a good thing I packed light, because Pammie had to put some of her Harry Potter haul in my luggage going home.


This s’mores hot chocolate was everything the internet promised it would be (@ Glace)

We got there before all the kids got out of school, so there wasn’t much of a line yet. While we were waiting for a taxi, this kid walking by asks her dad, “Daddy, what are all these people waiting for?” and he was like, “They’re just a bunch of TikTokers waiting for hot chocolate.” 😂

all'antico nyc

La Summer (@ All’Antico Vinaio)

We invited our cousin from LA because she mentioned wanting to go to NY the last time she visited. This was the one place she wanted to go to, and they had a location right by our hotel. They had a pop-up at Mozza2Go in LA last year,  but sold out before she could get any. I’ve eaten at one of Nancy Silverton’s other restaurants, Pizzeria Mozza, and anything good enough for her is good enough for me! This italian sandwich shop def didn’t disappoint.

the rink at rockefeller center

Toe pick ⛸️ (@ The Rink at Rockefeller Center)

The last couple times I’ve been in New York was during the summer and this rink closes in April. I’ve always wanted to go ice skating here! I was so scared to go ice skating because my balance has been off since the strokes. Apparently, your iPhone measures your walking steadiness now, and I recently got this notification that I’m a fall risk 😅 I held on to the wall the entire time, but I’m glad I went!

Grand Central Terminal

luke's lobster

We hit up Grand Central Terminal, because there’s a food hall inside of it. I had a lobster roll and a mule from Luke’s Lobster. The lobster tastes so much more fresh when they don’t have to fly it to the west coast!

I wasn’t planning on going to Magnolia since I’ve been to the one in LA, but they had a location inside the food hall, so I had to get some banana pudding.

moulin rouge musical

moulin rouge musical

Spectacular, spectacular (@ Al Hirschfield Theatre)

Moulin Rouge is one of my favorite movies, and the Broadway musical was amazing! It easily tops Waitress as my favorite musical ever. When we were getting snacks before the show, we asked the guy at concessions if they had any real food because we hadn’t eaten yet, and he was like, “Sorry, we don’t. The hibachi’s getting installed tomorrow.” LOL.

harry potter ny

If you need me, I’ll be at the Butterbeer Bar (@ Harry Potter NY)

Pammie was in heaven and spent hours at the Harry Potter store, while my cousin (who’s never seen a Harry Potter movie) and I drank butterbeer and ate butterbeer soft serve.

katz's deli

My favorite place to fake an orgasm (@ Katz’s Deli)

katz's deli

We had to go here after recently watching When Harry Met Sally in the theater. The pastrami sandwich was def orgasm-inducing, and so was the guy who helped us (S/O to Julian!) 😜

nyc starbucks roastery

My sister fell in love with espresso martinis at the Starbucks Reserve Roastery we went to in Chicago (even though she doesn’t usually like coffee or vodka!), so when we found out there was a roastery in NYC, we had to go here (@ Starbucks Reserve Roastery)

nyc desserts

We couldn’t go to NY without getting a quintessential black and white cookie and cheesecake from Junior’s.

starbucks roastery nyc

When my sister’s husband found out we were going to NYC, he showed me this video where they try the world’s most expensive cereal from this bakery in Brooklyn.

They only make a limited amount of boxes and they sell out every morning, so we went there at an unholy hour and were the first people in line. I once stood in line in LA for 2 hours for Howlin’ Rays Hot Chicken the morning after I got absolutely trashed at a music festival, so this was nothing compared to that 😅 We got a box each, so it was worth it. I also got a raspberry almond croissant here that was *chef’s kiss*.


Coney Island closes the boardwalk and rides during the winter, but Nathan’s is still open! I had the best hot dog ever (although I was bummed I took that packet of relish out of my purse from the last time I ate a Costco hot dog LOL). I’ll def have to come back here during the summer to watch the hot dog eating contest live (I watch it on TV with bated breath every 4th of July).

hometown bar-b-que

Checked another one off my BBQ Bucket List (@ Hometown Bar-B-Que)

When planning my trip, I looked up BBQ in NYC and went to add this place in Brooklyn to my BBQ Bucket List and saw it was already on there!

nyc snow

It started snowing while we were there. BBQ and snow??? It doesn’t get more magical than that.

When I got off the plane when we arrived, I felt hot and nauseous so I sat down. I ended up having to run to the bathroom and blowing chunks all over the first stall. I’m sorry to the pissed cleaner that had to clean it all up 😅 Last night when I was in bed around midnight, I felt hot and nauseous again. The heat was cranked up in our hotel room because it was so cold outside, so I was sleeping in my underwear. I ran to the bathroom with no pants on and threw up all the BBQ I ate earlier. The only common denominator when I threw up Friday morning and Sunday night was that I had BBQ both days. Can I not eat BBQ anymore??? I was gonna smoke my first brisket next weekend for when the girls come over for my birthday, but now I’m scared to eat BBQ. Usually, if I get sick after eating something, I never eat it again (this is why I don’t eat strawberry ice cream or chicken fried steak LOL), but it’s BBQ! I can’t give that up…

aura photographs

We couldn’t go to NYC without getting updated photos of our auras taken in Chinatown.

I once went to a festival in LA where they were charging triple the price to photograph your aura. Another vendor at the same festival gave me a paper boba straw when I ordered a drink! Fucking LA 😅 I used to keep a box of plastic straws in the trunk of my car for when Nori and I would go to Starbucks on our lunch break because plastic is banned in Manhattan Beach. I can’t with the paper straws! (Calm down, I recycle. Get off me).

artichoke basille's pizza

Last meal in NYC (@ Artichoke Basille’s Pizza)

I would eat pizza every day if I could, and my favorite style is New York (I love a thin crust, none of that Chicago deep-dish bullshit). I love that there’s pizzerias on every corner and they all taste good!

jetblue mint

The last time we flew home from NYC, Pammie watched Harry Potter, while I watched Homicide for the Holidays. This time, she watched another Harry Potter movie while I watched true crime on the ID channel. We haven’t changed.

christmas tree

I saw so many Christmas trees dumped on the side of the street. The holidays and my birthday are officially over, and they were spectacular ❤️

Friday, January 12, 2024


Shi comin’ in hot with the tea! I love chisme on any given day, but especially on my birthday 😆

Here Today.
Wednesday, January 10, 2024

sparklers in pudding

It’s officially been a year since I checked into the hospital after the incident 😅 Life took a 180 after the pandemic, and another 180 after having the strokes, so I’ve done a complete 360 and am back to where I started 😆 So grateful to still be here today and celebrate with this chocolate vanilla swirl pudding snack (yes, I instacarted this jello, and yes, it’s sugar-free).

Sidenote: Adan Canto, who played Arman Morales on The Cleaning Lady, passed away yesterday after a private battle with cancer 💔 I don’t usually get choked up about celebrities dying (unless it’s Paul Walker, Robin Williams, Chris Cornell, Chester Bennington, Anthony Bourdain, Kobe… ok, maybe I do). I can’t believe he’s gone. He was my age. Life is short. Give your loved ones a big hug today…

Winter Is Coming.
Tuesday, January 9, 2024

sd to ny

Me checking the weather before my trip:

cold game of thrones gif

Smoke All Day.
Saturday, January 6, 2024

smoked. wings

Smoked wings, anyone???

I smoked them and then air-fried them so they were extra crispy. It smells like BBQ up in this bitch. This is what I imagine heaven smells like. I’ll request BBQ for my last meal in case I’m not headed there 😅

Wizards at Work.
Friday, January 5, 2024

door hanger

Pammie works out of her bedroom, so she got this Harry Potter door hanger so her husband doesn’t ask her if she wants to smoke while she’s on a zoom call, and I don’t bust in with no pants on to look out her window and see if my favorite dog, Lucille, is sunbathing on the balcony next door 😅

Thursday, January 4, 2024


My parents are on their way to a cruise and upgraded their flight there to premium economy. Didn’t know it came with champagne! My sister helped them book their flights, so not sure if this is like the time she got me a plane ticket to meet her in Chicago, and the flight attendant came by with a cheese plate and I was like, “I didn’t order that,” and she was like, “Pamela pre-ordered it.” And I was like, “Oh, okay!” While I was eating my wedge of brie, the flight attendant came by again with a bottle of champagne and was like, “She ordered this, too!” My aisle mates were so jealous. It was a morning flight, but I still drank the whole bottle of champagne and slept the rest of the plane ride from LAX to O’Hare 😅

I’ve only ever flown first class on my sister’s dime. She’s bougie and likes to travel in style. If I’m booking it, I’m like uhhh how many Southwest points do I have? 😅 When Shi found out we were going to New York for my birthday, she was like, “How much are flights right now?” and I was like, “Uhh IDK, Pammie bought them.” And she looks over at my sister, and Pammie was like, “We’re flying first class, so…” and Shi was like, “Oh, my bad!” And this was right after my sister explained that all her Harry Potter ornaments were spotless because Leticia the housekeeper dusted them LOL. In her defense, she hosted Christmas, so that’s why she had Leticia clean the house. She was referred to her by two of our other friends who also use Leticia to clean their houses. Coincidentally, we also get waxed by the same person. If you don’t share a housekeeper and a Brazilian waxer, are you even friends??? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thursday, January 4, 2024

world's smallest gifts

Everyone knows I love miniature things, so for Christmas my dad’s sister sent me The World’s Smallest Battleship, Jenga and Lava Lamp. I’m also clumsy as fuck, so I dropped them all on my way to my room. Pammie was like, “Did you pick everything up? You don’t want to accidentally step on a tiny battleship!” And guess what I stepped on barefoot today??? I was like, “WHAT THE FUCK!” and I looked down and there it was… the world’s smallest battleship.

i hope you step on a lego

Oh, it’s personal.

Lovin On Me.
Thursday, January 4, 2024

I’m vanilla, baby
I’ll choke you, but I ain’t no killer, baby

Wednesday, January 3, 2024

fantasy football ring

File under: Shit I get asked to do because I know Photoshop.

Obviously a dude had the championship ring made since it says, “The Motherfucking king of fantasy football,” even though the ring was made after two girls joined the league (my sister and my ex’s wife—not me, I don’t know anything about football), and Pammie won last year!

Gucci Gang.
Wednesday, January 3, 2024

gucci bag

I’m not really into designer purses, but I’ve been eyeballing this minimalist Gucci bag for years now, so I just bit the bullet and bought it. Should I also get the matching wallet or is my Ikea coin purse okay? 😆

Tuesday, January 2, 2024

work email

I’m back from vacay and my boss took an extra week off. I’m the most senior designer after the web director (my 11-year work anniversary is tomorrow!), so I’ve been telling everyone I’m Gaye this week 😆

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