» Negatory.
Posted on June 8th, 2022 in coronavirus, crumbl

negative covid home test

I went to my bestie’s kid’s graduation over the weekend, and more than half her family tested positive for covid afterwards. Luckily, all I got from the festivities was a fierce sunburn on my chest, minus a diagonal strip of white skin where my purse strap used to be.

I know over a dozen people who have gotten covid this past month alone. I’ve somehow managed to dodge it for 2+ years now, so don’t come over unless you’re dropping off some aloe vera. Or cookies from that new Crumbl shop that just opened down the street.


  1. Jed was all like...

    I’m one of the last ones of my friends that hasn’t gotten it either. Also, I don’t know how I found myself here.

    June 10th, 2022 | #

  2. mayan was all like...

    holy shit. i think the last time i mentioned you on this thing was when you responded to my craigslist ad in 2010 lolol. glad to see you’re still alive and covid-free!

    June 15th, 2022 | #

  3. trebor was all like...

    holy shit i fvkken love crumbl! there are like two here within five miles of me

    June 20th, 2022 | #

  4. mayan was all like...

    you should totally come get some the next time you’re in town… and then we can get crumbl afterwards. ha. srsly tho, their cookies give me life.

    June 21st, 2022 | #

  5. revenge of trebor was all like...

    well, you sure know how to make a boy blush. on an unrelated note, my favorite part of the cinematic masterpiece ‘face/off’ is when nic cage (well, i think it’s his face on john travolta’s body) looks deadpan into the camera and says ‘i could eat a cookie for hours…’

    June 22nd, 2022 | #

  6. mayan was all like...

    holy shit. i just choked on my honey bun crumbl cookie.

    June 23rd, 2022 | #

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