Some of y’all ain’t never had to make your own ringtones on a Nokia flip phone, and it shows 😆

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been getting email notifs from KinkyTemptation. Did someone sign me up as a joke? I would never use my government name (marionc) as a handle on such an unserious site, and everyone hitting up my account has been female (your girl is strictly dickly 🍆).

This all started the same day I received my Flintts Mints 🤔

(via @laceyblair_lbm)

I am her. She is me. We are us.

• ‘You can just move all that’ is something you’ve heard me say if you’ve ever been in my car – Also, if you’re gonna make me drive, you get what you get ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
• I once got a ticket in DTLA for having expired vehicle registration tags on the first day they expired (July 1st!). My bad, eagle eye! I didn’t even get pulled over for any reason other than expired tags.
• Even though I work from home, my phone is almost always dead 😅

A Padres player would never 🙄

Pammie and her husband left for a shotgun trip to Vegas at the ass crack of dawn this morning to watch the MNF Chargers/Raiders game at Allegiant tomorrow. They wanted to get there in time to watch the football games on TV today, plus they left even earlier to chill in the Chase Sapphire Reserve lounge at the airport before their flight.

I slept till a more decent hour, then headed back to LA. There was absolutely no traffic – I usually drive down to SD mid-afternoon (after I’ve gotten my life together) and it always takes me 3+ hours. I barely made it twice through my Deftones playlist before I was already home! 🤘🏼

Ellie Banke – Dive (Ellie’s version)

Oh, maybe I came on too strong
Maybe I waited too long
Maybe I played my cards wrong
Oh, just a little bit wrong
Oh, baby, I apologize for it

I can’t fvcking stand Ed Sheeran, but I love covers of his songs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(via @bbgreatmoments)

Jess sometimes gets tickets behind home plate from her husband’s contractor. She invited me to a game last season and our tickets came with access to the Home Plate Club, private access to watch the Padres take batting practice in their off-field batting cage, and complimentary food and drinks. She told me not to eat a hot dog while we were in our seats bc they were behind home plate and we might be on TV LOL, so I scarfed down that wiener in record time off camera in the club lounge 😆

Mumford & Sons – I Will Wait

I will wait, I will wait for you

Twenty One Pilots – Ride

Oh, I’m fallin’
So I’m takin’ my time on my ride

Cage the Elephant – Come A Little Closer

Heart breaks, the heavy world’s upon your shoulders
Will we burn on or just smolder?

Lord Huron – The Night We Met

I had all and then most of you
Some and now none of you
Take me back to the night we met

The Fray – Over My Head (Cable Car)

And suddenly
I’ve become a part of your past
I’m becomin’ the part that don’t last
I’m losing you, and it’s effortless

Dashboard Confessional – Vindicated

Vindicated, I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right, I swear I’m right
Swear I knew it all along

My wallet: But you’re seeing Mumford and Lord Huron at the Wild Horses festival in December?
Me: I’ve actually already seen most of these bands live before. Don’t you know your girl’s a repeat offender? 😜

☑️ Flights booked
☑️ VIP tickets purchased

VIP tickets were nearly $1K, but it’s worth it to have a dedicated seated viewing platform, air-conditioned restrooms, and a private bar. Besides, I have hella Southwest points, so my flights were free, and I’m probably gonna sell my Sunday wristband – Blink 182’s a hometown band, but I don’t think they sound v good live 😅 so I’ll get some of that money back.

(via @the.wellness.therapist)

(via @kingjeanty1989)

(via @grahamghammer)

(via @zaynrodondi)

(via @americans4peace)

The shooter was, as per usual, one of you guys – American, white, republican, and born and raised in Utah.

Just relieved the police have ‘white’-dentified the suspect

I think it’s worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment to protect our other God-given rights.

How’d that work out for you? 🙄

How ironic that this racist white guy was fatally shot by another white guy in one of the whitest states in America. ‘Just saying.’

I was eating breakfast at a diner in Joshua Tree this morning, and this loud ass old white guy from Texas was on his phone talking about being a Trump supporter and complaining about ‘idiot millennials’ having their phones glued to their hands at all times.

#1 Sir, you’re the only one in this diner full of younger people who is on their phone – and you’re def not a millennial, but probably an idiot! And #2 Can I fucking enjoy my chicken fried steak in peace?!

Young the Giant, we out here ✌🏼 (@ Pappy & Harriet’s)

The Pioneertown Motel is walking distance to where the concert was at Pappy & Harriet’s, so we could hear them doing sound check from our room.

POV: You’re standing behind two of the tallest guys on earth (they were at least a foot taller than me, so 6’7+), and they’re super gay and in love, so they’re all over each other throughout the entire show 🤪

My stems are sore today bc the show was standing room only for 3 hours. Am I getting too old for this shit? (Don’t answer that).

(via @happypotato)

They only had single rooms left, so we had to share a queen bed. I apologized to Mary in advance and told her I sleep like the purple potato 😅 I am who I am ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

We were listening to her playlist on the drive home, and right before this song came on, she was like, ‘Try not to cry.’ I was like, ‘Cry??? Why, is it Bon Iver?’

You silently cry at the end of yoga during savasana one time (partly bc you’re exhausted, but mostly bc they’re playing Bon Iver), and people never let you forget it!

Home for the night 🌵 (@ Pioneertown Motel)

We ate at a diner that Anthony Bourdain once visited 💔 (@ JT Country Kitchen)

I had the country fried steak, which I haven’t had in years since I doordashed it from a Cracker Barrel ghost kitchen and it gave me heartburn 😅 I haven’t had any heartburn or frequent headaches since the stroke – it seems to have cured a lot of my ailments, but 0/10 would not recommend having a stroke 😆

I strive to be this level of unbothered.

Last day of radiation for the bestie! 💐🔔

What I typically snack on when I’m driving to SD from LA: Hot Fries and bottled iced coffee from the gas station

What Pammie packs me when I go back to LA: Bottled water and homemade trail mix that she weighs out based on single serving size (freeze-dried pineapples, freeze-dried mangos, roasted unsalted almonds and dark chocolate covered acai berries)

One time, we were going back to her house from my parents’ house, and we stopped at the gas station. I was like, ‘Do we need snacks?’ and she was like, ‘We are 10 minutes away from my house. This ain’t a road trip!’ 😅

It took me nearly 3 hours to drive down to SD on a Saturday afternoon. This entitled asshole in a white Audi kept weaving in and out of traffic. His back bumper was missing, probably bc he drives like a fucking idiot. Then, when I was in the fast lane, this group of moms in a minivan who looked like they were on their way to Disneyland (out of state plates and all wearing visors) tried to cross the double-solid lines from the HOV lane into my lane, and I had to swerve into the next lane to avoid crashing into them. Luckily, no one was in the lane next to me, but the driver gave me a dirty look like it was my fault she didn’t know how to fucking drive!

Driving in LA has def made me a better, more aggressive driver, but I can’t wait to not do this commute anymore…

Them: How come you never share what’s going on in your personal life?

Their faces when I give them a breadcrumb of what’s going on:

I thought you said this was a safe space! 😅

Creatine in my iced coffee and corned beef hash for breakfast ☀️

Toured this apartment in downtown SD last night and it surpassed all my expectations:

• A ton of tenants already had Halloween decorations out – I’ve found my people 🖤
• Secure garage with gate
• Secure elevator that you need a code to use like at a hotel
• 24-hour fitness center
• Rooftop terrace
• Pool
• Dog-friendly
• Didn’t see any children 😆
• Limited homeless population – I was worried there would be a ton of homeless people in the area being downtown, but the property seemed relatively safe and secure
• Across the street from Quartyard (where I’ve seen concerts), but the apartment I’m looking at is on the other side of the building, so I won’t have to deal with the noise
• The apartment I’m looking at faces this construction site – I found out through some light googling that they’re building East Village Green – a community park
• ASA Bakery (Japanese pastries!) is in the same building
• The property is only 5 blocks from Petco Park (although the Padres’ postseason hopes are dwindling). I did see a bunch of people in Savannah Bananas gear, as they were in town this weekend for Banana Ball at Petco 🍌⚾
• The property is also walking distance to Callie, this great resto that Jessie frequents and her husband is in a fantasy football league with the staff 😆 We always get VIP treatment there, and Jess was able to get us a table without reservations even though they were booked for the night.

Mediterranean Feast + much needed drinks with the girls. We try to get together at least once a month, but it’s been a few months despite our daily group chats. Lots of updates all around that were better to discuss in person, not a group chat where screenshots and receipts could be collected 😅 Can’t wait to be back in SD for more nights like this…

I’ve only lived in 3 apartments on my own in this life, and I have a habit of signing the lease for the first apartment I look at. My sister and her husband think I should look around at other neighborhoods before settling on this property, but I’m already in love.

The bestie moved out of El Cajon (and SD) while I was in LA, so there’s no other reason for me to look in East County. My parents are still in Spring Valley and my sister (plus my ex and old friends) live in Chula Vista, so I don’t really wanna be too close LOL. I always said I’d live in North Park if I ever moved back to SD. I liked that it was central, walkable, and dogs are welcome almost anywhere. But I used to see this fuckboi in North Park who lived on Arizona street, and also ended a few situationships there, so I have less than fond memories of that area. My dad actually used to live in North Park before he met my mom, but that was when it was really ghetto he says 😅 Now it’s gentrified, full of coffee shops, breweries and hipsters.

Living downtown never appealed to me before, but I like having nice things now 😆

I drive by this Herbalife building off the 405 all the time, and I never knew this food hall was in the same lot (@ The Enclave)

Nori and I had chili dogs from Irv’s Burgers, then I got a drink from Boba Break Tea House. I’ll def be back to try the rest of the fare, perhaps on ‘Weiner Wednesdays’ at Trademark Brewing 😜

Intense staring contest going down on Manhattan Beach Boulevard right now 👀

I bought these mints off Instagram, partly because I’m the ultimate consumer, but mostly because I get severe cottonmouth whenever I take gummies (I only take them when I go to a concert or get anxious – so all the time 😅).

But I just saw this TikTok reel promoting the same product for something else entirely – ‘sloppy toppy’ 😳

*googles wtf is sloppy toppy*

(not me thinking it was some bullshit gen-z slang like ‘rawdog’ which used to mean something sexual in my day LOL, but now is totally innocent)

…guess I’ll just keep them in my box of shame, along with my other toys 😅

BRB, live-streaming Young the Giant performing their debut album in its entirety from The Troubadour in West Hollywood on Volume ✌🏼

TBT to the first of many YTG concerts in 2011. You make everyone go to one YTG show on someone else’s birthday and no one ever lets you forget it! 😅

…and I used to live in Paradise Hills 😅

When I was little, my mom and her sisters – who were in their 20s at the time – got into a fight with these girls who wouldn’t let my grandma use the water fountain at the park. My uncle took me and the rest of the kids home while my mom and her sisters stood on business LOL. I remember my aunt pulled out their braids and took their watches. I was maybe 6-years-old, but it’s a core memory for me, guys 😆

Don’t mess with the Cuevas ladies… They’re even crazier in their 60s 😂

Scheduled a tour for an apartment in downtown SD this weekend, but also ran into my new next door neighbor today – a tall white guy with two 6yo gray frenchies who are sisters (he got them right before covid, so they’re stage-5 clingers). The first thing I usually notice on a guy is if he’s wearing a wedding ring or not, but I was too busy loving on his sweet dogs in the elevator to notice. Besides, I don’t shit where I sleep (anymore 😅).

One: don’t pick up the phone
You know he’s only callin’ ’cause he’s drunk and alone
Two: don’t let him in
You’ll have to kick him out again
Three: don’t be his friend
You know you’re gonna wake up in his bed in the morning
And if you’re under him, you ain’t gettin’ over him
I got new rules, I count ’em

(via @localspookydude)

As I was eating my Hodad’s burger, I saw this burly ass dude sipping on a red fruity yard slush from Frozen Friar like he was at a bachelorette party in Vegas, while his wife was chugging a beer. There are two types of drinkers in the world and these two married each other 😆

Hoobastank, we out here 🤘🏼 (@ Viejas)

I recreated this shirt from an old Hoobastank shirt I got 20+ years ago.

Dan (the guitarist) gave us the setlist after the show, Chris (the drummer) gave us one of his drumsticks, several people complimented us on our shirts and asked where we got them bc they were only selling Everclear merch, one took a picture of me, and Doug (the lead singer) pointed out my shirt on the mic! My eyes are up here, Doug Robb 👀 Also, I’m staying in room 1208 at the Willow’s side of the hotel tonight 😜

I posted my shirt and my pic of the setlist to my IG stories, and @hoobastank, @hoobadougroub, and @danielestrin liked and reposted my story 🫠 I can die now. Please invite them to my funeral and have them perform Inside of You ✌🏼

🫠🫠🫠

There is a hell, and it’s the 405 in Long Beach in the summer 🥵

(via @jessicastocker_)

Oh, so we just all have the same type now? 😆

I don’t need Yahoo Answers to tell me I’m not pregnant – I just crave pickles and ice cream like I’m eating for two 😆

(via @javadoodles)

I don’t identify with much of a Capricorn’s traits – I’m idealistic, flighty and irresponsible. But I like to blame things on astronomical phenomenons like mercury retrograde and moon phases – pretty much anything but my own poor life choices 😅

They unexpectedly gave us an extra day off tomorrow for Labor Day, so I’ve been working tirelessly this week to get all my shit done a day early because due dates don’t care about your 4-day weekend 😅 I haven’t left my apartment in 3 days 😵‍💫 I hear this thud on my balcony and was like, ‘Shit, how windy is it outside?’ I got an email last night about a ‘life-threatening wind storm‘ hitting LA, and thought it was that. I look outside and saw this squirrel knocked over the Birdbuddy that not a single bird has visited in the past month, and now he’s feasting on the fruit and seed mix all to himself. TBH, I’d rather feed the squirrels than the birds, I’ve just never seen them this high before (I live on the top floor).

Here’s a video of a squirrel eating nuts in my parents’ backyard. Yes, we feed wild animals, and yes, I got them that tiny picnic table from Etsy.

Update: I just looked out there and there’s two squirrels now. He told his friends 😆

(via @mariomirante_)

BRB, adding ‘doordash and smash’ to my list of hobbies under my Tinder bio.

He’s not wrong – this title had me salivating when I saw it on the album’s track list, and when I finally heard it, it did not disappoint. I have always loved Deftones’ softer shit (even Chino’s side band, †††, is more my usual speed). Sextape, Beauty School, and Minerva are among my favorites, and all on my Deftones playlist, along with a bunch of other songs that could lull adulterous CEOs into an unsuspecting sway 😏

Jessie and Abe are Padres season ticket holders, so we were able to get presale to the festival! Can’t wait to cry downtown with these b’s 😭

Pammie was able to get us front row tickets! The next best thing to being in a suite 😆

Mumford & Sons – Ghosts That We Knew

Hold me still
Bury my heart next to yours

Lord Huron – Long Lost

Lay me in the tall grown grass in a shallow grave
Let it have me

(via @kaelidance)

You got a dark side, guess you’re not the only one
What if we both tried fighting what we’re running from?
We can’t fix it if we never face it
What if we find a way to escape it?

Do I just have a thing for animated demons? 😅

Or just all demons?

While we’re on the subject of embarrassing revelations about myself, I was raving about how much I love banana pudding at the Padres game, and my sister was like, ‘Didn’t you used to love the banana cream pie from Coco’s, too?’ I was like, ‘Ya! One time (before the stroke, obviously) I doordashed an entire banana cream pie from Coco’s. As I was eating a slice, I thought to myself, ‘Is this rock bottom?’ 😅

Anyway, I’m already regretting posting this. Might delete later, probably.

I stayed an extra day at my sister’s, as evident by the Harry Potter bowl, flaxseed in my cereal, and creatine in my iced coffee. I apparently need more protein in my life? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(via @marianavicente)

I hate how much I love this man.

My grandma loved butterflies. Ever since she passed in 2020, we’d always say it was her visiting whenever we’d see a butterfly. At her funeral, I sent a silent prayer up above, ‘Please don’t haunt me.’ 😅 LOL few things scare me more than ghosts, and she hasn’t visited me in my dreams since…

Anyway, when we heard about this Butterfly Release Memorial Celebration at Liberty Station, we thought it’d be a nice way to honor her. It was cathartic – releasing butterflies, remembering the loved ones we’ve lost, and letting go of all the things not meant for me 🥺

Petco Park, I am in you. LFGSD ⚾💛🤎

I have been to several Padres vs. Dodgers games (both in SD and LA, both during the regular season and the postseason), and the Padres have never won against the Dodgers in my presence until last night! It was incredible. Thanks to Pammie for buying us tickets in the Agave Club 😘

Jessie and Abe were there with Baby Isaac, and Jess was wearing a City Connect shirt. I was like, ‘How’d you know they were gonna wear their City Connect uniforms tonight?’ And she was like, ‘Because it’s Friday!’ I was today years old when I found out that the Padres always wear their City Connect uniforms at home games on Fridays 😅 If I would’ve known that, I might’ve cricutted a brighter shirt for today.

I saw people watching the game from their balconies in the surrounding buildings and thought, ‘What a cool view.’ Pammie was like, ‘If I bought one of these condos downtown for you to rent, would you move back to SD?’ Um, 100%! I was looking at prices of rentals overlooking Petco and the median was $4,000/month 😵‍💫 I could afford to live there if I didn’t do any extracurriculars 😅 It was like when I was living in my apartment in La Mesa, but was so poor, all I did was work at my graphic design job during the day, go to art school at night, do my homework at the library because they had free air conditioning, and eat honeydew with a spoon with Shi on hot days. Life was so much simpler back then, but I’m financially stable now 😅 People who make less money than I do have nicer cars, own homes… It all depends on what you want to spend your money on. And I would rather pay for VIP access at a concert or first class on an airplane than own a nice car. I was looking at more affordable rentals (still downtown, but not overlooking Petco), and they were in the low $2,000s/month. That, I would be okay paying. It’s comparable to the rental prices in LA, look much nicer than the apartment I live in now, have in-unit washers/dryers (some asshole hit my parked car at the laundromat last month), and I’d save money in gas not driving back and forth from LA to SD all the time.

My boss recently told our web team (who’s been WFH since the pandemic), that she was talking to our VP about the new buildings our department is moving into soon (the print team has been working in our current office for the past few years. They started building the new offices during the pandemic and people started moving in this month), and his boss (the CEO’s son), doesn’t plan on having the web team come in. I’ve always felt like he thought the web department wasn’t important (we get the revenue reports, and a single one of our emails generated $5 million in revenue last year, so I beg to differ), so I’m not surprised he doesn’t care if we’re in-office or not. Besides, my boss and I are the only ones who live near the office in the South Bay, because we were here before the pandemic. Everyone else is scattered throughout LA (or have moved out of state), and I know they wouldn’t be down to commute. She said it’s not official yet, but something to think about…

I find the office environment very toxic (not all offices, just this department in particular), and I was dreading being in-office again soon. I even made a portfolio in case it was too much and I decided to leave. I’ve lived in LA for 13 years now (I moved here to work at this same company), and it’s never felt like home. Sure, it has good restos, and artists always have shows in LA, but Mexican food in SD will always be superior to Mexican food in LA (fight me), and I’ve gone to more shows in SD this year (it’s always easier than going to the same show in LA), plus most of my friends and family are in SD. If I have the opportunity to still work for an LA company (and make LA money!), but move back home to SD, I should take it, right?

Deftones – i think about you all the time

All of my life
You’ve been the same
All of our days
And we’ll never change

Private Music dropped today 🐍🖤

(via @whitneyhansonpoetry)

‘Cause sooner or later
This is bound to stop
Come on, let’s savor
What we’re falling for

These shows were rescheduled from January because of the wildfires. I love Young the Giant (understatement of the year), I love when bands perform albums in their entirety, I love the Troubadour, but I hate schlepping to West Hollywood on a Friday night. And when I was looking at ticket prices in January, it was $700 to go to both shows 😵‍💫 This way, I can save several hundred dollars, and cry sing as loud as I want in the privacy of my own home. Besides, I’m seeing them live in Pioneertown next month ✌🏼

I’m the only one who doesn’t dye my hair in my family. My parents have been box dyeing their grays for years now, and so has my sister who is only 13 months older than me. She usually gets balayage done at the salon and touches up her roots herself. Sometimes my sister dyes my mom’s hair and my mom dyes my dad’s hair. I’m not allowed to dye anyone’s hair – You accidentally mix the developer with the conditioner instead of the color gel once, and people never let you forget it 😅 They would always say how lucky I am that I don’t get grays. I don’t blow dry or straighten my hair, either, I’ve got that stick straight Asian hair that doesn’t hold a curl.

Anyway, when I was brushing my hair the other day, I noticed one hair in my part shining in the light. It was a fucking white hair! I asked Pammie to tweeze it, and she was like, ‘Which one???’

Which one?! I beg your finest pardon?! You guys, I apparently have multiple gray hairs… Am I old? (Don’t answer that).

I love me some salt and pepper on a man, but this is not a cute look for me 👵🏻

Legit almost squeezed some tamarindo in my eye this morning.

In my defense, I had just woken up and wasn’t wearing my glasses. Also, the tamarindo bottle and eye drops bottle are v similar in color. Whenever I’m working, IDK how many times I’ve opened Spotify when I meant to open Excel (both green icons) or opened iMovie instead of Teams (both purple icons).

Is there a term for people who confuse similar colors? I’m not color blind. At least I don’t think I am 😅 I’ll just keep my Mexican candy in bed with me to avoid confusion 😆

Def not getting bangs and most def not getting banged 😅

Also, I have regretted getting bangs every time I’ve done it. EVERY 👏🏼 DAMN 👏🏼 TIME 👏🏼

(via @rachelelizabethx0)

(via @abe.gatling)

It’s on sight! 🫡

Tickets don’t go on sale until next week, but I’m def going to this 🥹

– Room booked at the Hilton Bayfront ✔️

– Prepared to spend the end of the year crying downtown (what else is new?) ✔️

Mumford & Sons – White Blank Page

You desired my attention
But denied my affections

Lord Huron – The Night We Met

I had all and then most of you
Some and now none of you
Take me back to the night we met

Jessie’s husband is probably the closest I’ll come to having an actual husband (we have the same birthday, we both hate yellow mustard, and we joke that we’re gonna marry each other after Jessie’s untimely death LOL).

I had a routine mammo done a few months ago, and they said I had to come back for more imaging because one of my breasts looked different compared to last year’s mammo. I rescheduled my appointment twice and finally got in today. Three of my dear friends got diagnosed with breast cancer in the past five years (two are in remission and one just finished chemo), so I was already a little anxious going in.

The lady did my mammo, and told me to wait a bit. She was going to have the radiologist assess my results and see if I need further imaging and/or an ultrasound. I’m waiting by myself in the mammo room for half an hour, fiddling with the ties on my exam gown, thinking the worst as the minutes ticked by. The lady comes back super apologetic for the wait, but everything was fine and I was cleared to leave.

I drove home feeliing lighter than when the day had started, and took my favorite route through PCH 🌴✨

When I got back to my apartment, I ran into my neighbor, Donna, in the elevator. She’s this older lady who has lived in this building longer than I have. I haven’t seen her since before I had the stroke, and I didn’t think she still lived here, but she lives on another floor. She always knows the chisme, and got me up to speed on all the tenants that have moved out and are moving in. She said a new girl was moving into the studio next to mine, but she hasn’t moved in yet. She said, ‘girl’, but Donna’s like 100-years-old, so IDK what she considers young LOL. I asked what happened to the lady who used to live there, and she was like, ‘Oh the deaf lady? She just moved out.’ I was relieved she didn’t die in there, but I felt like an asshole because I never knew she was deaf, and I’ve said, ‘Hi’ to her before to no avail, thinking she was rude 😅

Update: Someone else I love coincidentally also had a mammo follow up today and wasn’t cleared like I was 😔 Hoping for a more positive outcome after her biopsy 🙏🏼

Baby, look into my eyes
You’re taking all my light
You’ll always love her, right?

Love this Cigarettes After Sex song, and love this cover from the other person’s POV even more 💔

(via @west_coast_foos)

Update: Jessie has season tickets and was seeing if they could upgrade to the Agave Club, since that’s where Pammie got us tickets for Friday’s game in SD against the Dodgers. People are selling their Agave Club tickets for $500+ each on resale sites, and she was telling Pammie she should sell them for profit. The Padres have lost the last three games I attended (all to the Dodgers), so I told her if she wants to sell them, I’d be okay with that. Maybe save that money for the postseason…

Last game of the series today 🙏🏼

(via @davi.47.83)

My sister and I both got our hair cut one time, and we each got a different stylist, but were seated next to each other. My stylist was talking to me the entire time, and Pammie and her stylist barely exchanged two words. By the end of the cut, my stylist had invited me to her house for Christmas (it was around the holidays). IDK if it’s because my sister has RBF LOL or because I just look friendly, but strangers always talk to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Another time, I remember taking a long drive with an ex, and by the end of the car ride, I realized I was the only one doing the talking, and I was like, ‘How come you’re not saying anything?’ and he was like, ‘Well, I couldn’t get a word in.’ 😳 My bad for being engaging!

You’ll drive in my car
Just tell me we are going somewhere

Since the stroke, I try not to speak as much. The stroke altered my speech, so it’s delayed and most people have a hard time understanding me. Even when someone is talking, and I have a great anecdote to add that totally relates, I usually refrain from saying it because most people don’t have the patience to hear me try to get it out (including me).

I gave my dad a Birdbuddy last Christmas, and birds would visit it daily. He took it down when my parents went on vacation, and he hasn’t put it back up yet, so I borrowed it and put it on my balcony. It’s been out there for 3 weeks now, and not one bird has visited me 😭 And there’s a thick line of trees in front of my building, too, so I know there’s birds out there.

Anyway, I’m just trying to navigate this post-stroke world, where people and birds aren’t attracted to my energy anymore 😅

Update: NM, I’m good with no birds ✌🏼

Pammie and her husband always complain about the birds waking them up at an unholy hour, too – it’s not the dulcet tones of birds chirping, either, it’s something more akin to this Tyler the Creator bullshit 😆

(via @stargurl771)

Boxed brownies kind of weekend.

I may or may not have cried into the batter, and have been eating my tears.

In an unrelated note, I started my period today.

(via @itsgivingmario)

Who needs Dodger Stadium when you can doordash Buffalo Wild Wings, make homemade garlic fries, get beer at the corner liquor store, and watch the game on your home theater projector???

It’s common knowledge that food tastes better when served in a coffin-shaped tray ⚰️🖤

Yes, the beer is Fistful of Gummies (by Second Chance Beer Company in SD), and yes, your girl loves a fruity sour. Someone once asked me for gum, and I only had the candy-flavored variety—Sour Patch Kids Gum and Starburst Gum. He was like, ‘Are you an adult???’ LOL get off me…

Update: The Padres lost 😩

When you’re trying to have a serious conversation, but your friends are moms 😅

Before she texted that the message was meant for her son, I was thinking, ‘Uhhh, IDK, is this a trick question?’ 😆

You can say ‘I love you’ in Helvetica, and you can say it with Helvetica Extra Light if you want to be really fancy, or you can say it with the Extra Bold if it’s really intense and passionate.

I watched this typography docu, Helvetica, in art school, and it has stuck with me after all these years.

Coincidentally, Jessie DM’d me this reel today and was like, ‘Is this you’ 🤣

(via @universe.decodee)

💯 this is me, and I would totally do the same – screenshot the logo, open it in Photoshop, zoom in and drag the guides to see if the letters are properly aligned.

You guys, IDK why I’m single when there are clearly other like-minded lunatics out there like me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The devil in your eyes
Won’t deny the lies you’ve sold
I’m holding on too tight, while you let go
This is casual

Obsessed.

Sombr has a few upcoming sold out shows in LA, but the cheapest I can find a ticket for is $300+ on StubHub. I usually buy my concert tickets in pairs, even if I don’t know who I’m going with yet, but I don’t think I’ll find anyone who would pay that much to see this guy. This is also why I go to John Mayer concerts by myself 😆

My favorite sandwich spot (All’Antico Vinaio) and bakery (Levain) in NYC are now both on Abbott Kinney Boulevard. We were walking behind this woman wearing a flowy dress, and some dude passes by and tells the woman, ‘OMG, you look like a goddess!’ He walks past me and Mary, and it was *complete silence* LOL. I looked down at my outfit (Moo Deng shirt, leggings and Vans), and asked her, ‘Do I not look like a goddess in this?’ 😅

My car was parked on the street, and I saw someone smiling and taking a picture of my bumper sticker, and the cashier at Jeni’s Splendid Ice Creams told me she loved my Moo Deng shirt, so I got my validation in the end 😆

I’ve only been to two of these stadiums (SD + LA), but can confirm, Petco Park is awesome ⚾💛🤎

Dodger Stadium is nothing to write home about – It’s in DTLA, and it sucks driving there no matter what time or day the game is. It doesn’t highlight local restos like Petco does – I usually just get a doyer dog, beer, garlic fries, Dole Whip… LOL standard baseball stadium fare. You would think LA would renovate the stadium since the Dodgers have made it to half the World Series in the past decade, and they built the Rams/Chargers and Clippers new stadiums, but Dodger Stadium feels dated (like Jack Murphy Stadium vibes if you were around SD in the 1900s 😆). And it’s ranked 10/30… What do 11-30 look like? 😅

Update: #1 MLB stadium in the league and now #1 in our division! LFGSD ⚾💛🤎

(via @terriblepadresmemes)

(via @cbcgem)

Pammie: [talking about work] And PWC suggested our monthly meeting could be in person just because they want to work out of our office at the beach once a month, but I could tell everyone who WFH wasn’t down with that. So I was like, ‘Maybe it could just be on an ad hoc basis’…
Me: What’s that mean? Ad hoc?
Pammie: Like, ‘sporadic’…
Me: Say less.

When I say, ‘explain it to me in terms I’ll understand’, this is what I mean 😆

My head was throbbing last night 🐸🔪

I used to get headaches all the time before the stroke (I’d take Excedrin Migraine on the daily), but I can count on one hand how many headaches I’ve gotten after the stroke (once when I got Covid, and another time when I moved back to LA and weirdly got my period twice that month). I had a migraine last night around 8p, took some Excedrin, and slept with an ice pack. I forgot Excedrin has caffeine in it, so I laid in bed wide awake till like 2 in the morning winning imaginary arguments in my head. According to my health app, my period is starting soon LOL, so hopefully that’s the culprit. If it’s something more serious, welp, it was nice knowing (most of) ya 😅

(via @carlabezanson)

…or me when my work bestie told me she has to go to the Ai4 Conference in Vegas this week 🥵 I’ll just be working out of my air conditioned apartment in my chonies, thank yew…

She is also going to Arizona this weekend 🔥

When it’s hot as balls outside (80° is hot to this socal girlie), you run the A/C and make some cold Greek Israeli Couscous Salad. Jessie used to make this for me all the time after I had my stroke 🥹

Greek Israeli Couscous Salad
Adapted from bowl of delicious

Ingredients:

• 16 oz. Israeli (Pearl) Couscous
• 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
• 1 teaspoon kosher salt
• 1 package (12 oz.) feta cheese, crumbled
• 1 can (3.8 oz.) sliced black olives
• 1 package (10 oz.) red grape tomatoes, sliced in halves
• 1 can (15.5 oz.) garbanzo beans
• 1 can (14 oz.) quartered artichoke hearts
• 1 large cucumber, sliced and quartered
• 1 cup diced red onion
• 1 cup Primal Kitchen Dressing & Marinade, Greek
• 4 tablespoons toasted pine nuts

Instructions:

1. In a medium pot, mix 16 oz. Israeli (Pearl) Couscous and 2 tablespoons of extra-virgin olive oil. Toast over medium heat, stirring frequently, until some of the pieces of couscous get brown in color. Add 3 cups water and 1 teaspoon kosher salt. Bring to a boil, cover, turn heat down to low, and simmer for 10 minutes, or until all the water has been absorbed (stir every so often to prevent sticking).
2. When the couscous is done, put it in a colander and run cold water over it until pearls are cool. Put it in the fridge as you prep the other ingredients.
3. Add all remaining ingredients to a large bowl and add the couscous. Gently mix it so everything is coated in the Greek dressing, and keep it chilled in the fridge until ready to eat.

My sister’s in a fantasy football league with our old friends from when we were kids, and their draft is today. It’s horrifying funny they haven’t changed since high school 😅

(via @bonnie5913)

The Party City that closed down unexpectedly earlier this year across from my sister’s house has been vacant since, but now is a Spirit Halloween store 🎃

(via @c.d.blair)

How early is too early to put up Halloween decorations? I want to propel a skeleton from my balcony, but my apartment faces the main street. The apartment next door to me is still vacant, and I don’t want to scare away any potential tenants. Or maybe I’ll just attract a really cool one 😈

I already have this door hanger up year round.

And wear this shirt year round.

And this one.

Update: Just added this shirt to the collection yesterday. Boys, try not to fall in love with me ⚰️🖤

(via @karlamardesign)

My sister’s husband DM’d me this reel today, and I’ve never felt more seen 🔪

(via @devoutlychristan)

I ain’t trying to have it all 😆

When I say I’m busy, this is what I mean 🧩🥃✌🏼

Update: This is how far I got before I started questioning my puzzle-solving abilities… Hopefully, I’ll be done by the time I’m on social security 👵🏻

We had a department puzzle competition at work once, and I thought we were doing so well. My intimate relationship with candy surprisingly did not give my team a leg up on the competition even though the puzzle was candy bar-themed, and we placed 9th out of 10th place 😅 Each person on the winning team won $500 each, while I just got a sore lower back from bending over for 2 hours and a consolation bag of cat farts.

Were you lying all the time?
Was it just a game to you?
But I’m in so deep
You know I’m such a fool for you
You got me wrapped around your finger
Do you have to let it linger?

This song is haunting me. First, it played on the last episode of The Summer I Turned Pretty (even though this song came out long before these kids were even born). Then, I heard it on the radio on Resurrection Sunday. Then, I heard it used on an IG reel.

This is probably my favorite Cranberries song 💔 followed closely by Zombie 🧟. And When You’re Gone. And Dreams. Damn, Dolores! You are missed…

Welp, I guess I have to work on those Snoop banners today after all 😅

(via @connor.connor.connor)

May this kind of love find me 😂

It’s Addams with two D’s – like ‘padded room’

🖤

(via @danielamora1)

My sister doesn’t usually drink (she has plenty of other vices LOL). She’s one of those Asians who turns bright red after a sip of Martini and Rossi. She does enjoy an espresso martini every once in a while (even though she normally doesn’t like coffee or vodka, but apparently mixed together is her sweet spot).

All that to say, she went to a party last weekend where she brought a bottle of Blanton’s Bourbon Whiskey, because it was the birthday girl’s favorite. Pammie tried it and said it was so smooth. I love a good cocktail, and I always tell Pammie, ‘You can’t even taste the alcohol’ and she can always taste it. Problem is, I like the taste of alcohol 😆

One NYE in my 20s, I drank so much Jack Daniel’s, I was throwing up well into the next year. I’ve been turned off by straight up whiskey since (though I don’t mind it in sangria), but I’m willing to partake in some Blanton’s if my sister likes it.

Let’s have a toast for the douchebags
Let’s have a toast for the assholes
Let’s have a toast for the scumbags
Every one of them that I know
Let’s have a toast for the jerk-offs
That’ll never take work off
Baby, I got a plan
Run away fast as you can

(via @major_keysss)

Y’all ain’t never went through no hard shit before, and it shows 😆

My boss always puts me in charge when she’s out of office because I’m the most senior web designer after her. Her name is Gaye, so I’ll be Gaye until noon 😆

Look at this fucking keto turmeric fried egg with baked kale gratin 👀

When I first had my stroke, I stayed at my sister’s house. I ended up staying there for a year and a half as I relearned how to speak, how to walk without falling down, how to take a shower by myself, how to cut my own nails, how to drive… I would sleep most of the day and was scared to eat like I used to before the stroke (grab snacks at the fucking gas station, doordash takeout for breakfast, lunch, and dinner), so I would meal prep healthy shit and Jessie and Christine were saviors, making and sending me healthy meals (I discovered a love for Israeli couscous and a hatred for overnight oats). Pammie and her husband still ate junk food, but they would always wait till I went to bed and would never eat it in front of me so I wouldn’t feel bad.

Now the roles are reversed, and Pammie has been on a gluten-free, dairy-free and soy-free diet for months now bc of her thyroid. She’s been doing so well and has dropped hella weight. She also exercises daily. She’s starting a keto diet this week, so I said I would join her. Been feeling blah lately, so maybe this is just what I need. I read that a routine can help you feel in control of your life, so instead of fixating on things I can’t control, I can focus on this. Now I’m not going completely keto, I still have plans to have dinner and dessert in Venice later this week… A girl has to make some concessions, after all.

Let’s get some fuckin’ french toast. And beer braised short rib hash. And lobster claws. And crab legs. (@ Tom Ham’s Lighthouse)

Pammie is starting a keto diet tomorrow, so I said I would join her. I like to carboload before starting any new fad diet that restricts my carb intake 😅

I’ve lived in SoCal all my life, and I often forget how beautiful it is here…

We ran into this girl outside as we were leaving who was talking about how she lives in Denver, and they have softball-sized hail. She got a weather alert before she went to work, so she just uber’d there to avoid dealing with the the hail storm while her coworkers’ cars were pelted beyond repair.

Another time, I remember my ex was working on a car, and there was an ice scraper tool in the backseat and I had no idea what it was. Apparently, it snows in East County ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My friends (who used to live in SD) were visiting from the east coast last month, and I had my A/C on. It was only 75° outside, and they were freezing. They were saying it’s been hot as fuck in North Carolina, above 90° with 70%+ humidity. I was like, ‘What’s the humidity here?’ She looks at her weather app, and is like, ‘Fucking ZERO.’ 😅

(via @lissylemonade)

Pammie and her husband are at a birthday party for my ex’s ex-girlfriend (she married my sister’s husband’s childhood friend). My sister asked me if it bothered me that she was friends with my ex’s ex, and she said she wouldn’t hang out with her if it does, but it really doesn’t bother me at all. She’s a nice girl who just happened to date my high school boyfriend before he dated me and that was over 20 years ago. My ex actually married my cousin’s friend from high school, and my sister is in a fantasy football league with his wife and old mutual friends of my ex of which I’m also unbothered.

I still made some comfort jambalaya and ate it alone on my sister’s rooftop ruminating over all my life choices 😅

(via @doctorwaffle86)

We’re all just searching for someone whose weirdness matches ours 🐔🍌🫠

My work has a line of kids’ shoes with air tags in them. This would’ve been useful when I was a toddler and my mom lost me at the swap meet. I mean, she eventually found me playing by myself in one of those plastic kiddie pools 😆

I was eating lunch with Nori and the resto had one of those kids’ play places. All the kids had taken off their shoes and were running around barefoot. My first thought was, ‘Gross. How often do they clean those play places?’ My second thought was, ‘Those air tags can’t track them if they get kidnapped with their shoes off’.

I believe that air tags serve a purpose (I have one on my keys, and I think they work well for people with Alzheimer’s who tend to wander off, or inside dogs’ collars), but if you’re gonna put one on your kid, maybe put it on something they won’t take off (like a watch or necklace), or just have them swallow it like Brian’s kids 😂

Morning view (@ Hilton San Diego Bayfront)

This is my go-to resto for breakfast if I’m in DTSD at the ass crack of dawn (@ Morning Glory)

Maren Morris 🤠💔 (@ The Rady Shell at Jacobs Park)

Maren Morris – Girl

Girl, won’t you stop your cryin’?
I know that you’re tryin’
Everything’s gonna be okay
Baby girl, don’t you hang your head low
Don’t you lose your halo
Everyone’s gonna be okay
Baby girl

Maren Morris – cut!

I’m such a pro, put a hell of a show on
As soon as I close that door shut

I’m screaming, “Cut!”
I need a moment to just let my tears fall where they want
Honestly, “Fuck!”
I’ve held it in long enough, I gave it all that I got

Maren Morris – this is how a woman leaves ✌🏼

This is where it’s gonna end
Not gonna try to be your friend
All I want is you to get
Out of my heart, out of my head
This is how a woman leaves
Even though it’s killing me
I’ll make it look so easy
That even I believe me
Go ahead and look me in the eye
Go ahead pretend that you’re surprised

Woke up sad. First, I was awakened at an unholy hour bc I could hear my sister on an early morning zoom call. Then, I was catching up on texts and Jessie sent us this video of my favorite sad scene from My Best Friend’s Wedding (a sequel is in the works). Then, I received a message that I left my sunglasses in my Uber drive home last night, so now I have to pay extra and coordinate with him to get them back. 2/10 morning.

Update: My sister had a zoom event for her AAPI group at work, and they made boba drinks. The meeting was led by white girls in NYC who kept calling it ‘bubble tea’, but this passionfruit butterfly pea fruit tea turned out great and she gave me it to drink (yes, she made it in a Harry Potter glass, and yes, today’s his birthday). Morning has been upgraded to 5/10.

I get my nails done every month by my girl Cindy at Chloe Nails. Nothing fancy, just black gel on my short nails so my man hands don’t look so manly 😆 I usually get my brows waxed, too, while I’m there. Cindy was like, ‘Got any plans the rest of the day?’ I was like, ‘Just a party in Murrieta for my cousin’s daughter’s graduation.’ She looked at what I was wearing (my Original Berf shirt, leggings and Vans) and was like, ‘Are you gonna go home first and get dressed up?’

CYNTHIA!

Then, when she was waxing my brows, she audibly gasped and was like, ‘Whoa! That’s a lot of hair.’ I was too busy to see her last month, so my nails and brows were a bit unruly. While Cindy was doing my nails, I looked over and saw this cute puppy listening to Cindy roast my ass 😆

My next door neighbor moved out. She was so quiet, I don’t think she even had a TV. I wouldn’t hear her for weeks at a time, and I’d think she was dead if she didn’t have regular Chewy deliveries at her door (she had a cat who was also quiet as fuck). When I was leaving today, I saw her door open and her apartment empty. I hope she just moved out and didn’t die in there 😅

I’ve lived in this building for 13 years, so I’ve seen a lot of people come and go. My neighbor on the other side of me has lived here longer than me (what’s good, Gloria? 😆 she’s also v quiet). My neighbor across the hall is my building manager (his name is Michael Douglas LOL no relation to the actor), and he and his wife have a golden retriever and are pretty quiet.

When they were removing the popcorn from my ceiling and remodeling my bathroom, I stayed in a vacant apartment on another floor on the other side of the building and it was so loud—people would take calls in the hallway, tenants would fuck with their windows open, someone would play an actual piano… I work from home, so I hear everything. Most of the people who have lived in the apartment next door have been quiet… except this one dude who also worked from home so he was there all day, and mounted his TV to our shared wall, and it was so loud, I could hear what he was watching. He was blasting it at 2am on a weeknight and I couldn’t take it anymore, so I rang his doorbell at 2am, woke up his dogs, and woke him up apparently, because he was sleeping with his loud ass TV on!

Hopefully, whoever moves in next door is more mindful of their neighbors (me LOL). It’s a studio identical to mine, if anyone’s looking for a rental in the South Bay and has $2,350 to spare each month 😅 I’m a great neighbor—I don’t own a TV (just a projector with a soundbar that’s far away from any shared walls), I don’t have a piano or any instruments, and I don’t fuck with my windows open (my windows don’t open 😜).

Eating my feelings 🍽️

Nori and I went to Go Go Curry inside Tokyo Central for lunch, then hit up the Japanese market afterwards to stock up on snacks (Hi-Chews, shrimp chips, and they had the sandwiches I’d eat multiple times daily from the 7-11 when I was in Japan, so I got one to try tomorrow).

Mary asked me if I wanted Bread Head for dinner, so we hit up downtown Manhattan Beach for sandwiches and ice cream at Salt & Straw. I almost killed her by offering her a bite of my Chicken Salad sando (she’s allergic to apples), but not before running into Matthew Stafford (the LA Rams’ QB) and his family. There are always athlete sightings in MB, but I never recognize athletes (although if it was Jimmy Garoppolo, I would’ve recognized his fine ass). Instead, when we were walking to the resto from the car, I was like, ‘Who is this tall ass white dude blocking the sidewalk?’ 🤣

When I first moved to LA, my friends from SD visited and we ate in downtown MB. Marshall Faulk (an ex-NFL player) and his bevy of blondes were seated at a communal table with us. I had no idea who he was, of course, but an old friend who was there with us had been a fan of his since he played for San Diego State. Marshall Faulk was such an asshole to him when he tried to talk to him, though! Hey man, only me and my friends are allowed to be assholes to our friend! Ha.

I was at Costco once holding a bag of torta bread, and this huge white guy was like, ‘Where did you find that?’ He was definitely an athlete, but I didn’t recognize him. I told him where I got the bread and he had toilet paper in his cart, so I was like, ‘Do you know where the toilet paper is?’ 😳 (Yes, I replay this embarrassing moment in my mind often).

(via @_natalieperkins_)

First, Theo from The Cosby Show dies, then Ozzy Osbourne, now Hulk Hogan?!

I hate it here ✌🏼

Update: Chuck Mangione also died (no relation to Luigi Mangione 😅)

All that I know is I don’t know
How to be something you miss

Chel asked me if I watched The Summer I Turned Pretty, and I hadn’t. She knows I’m a sucker for a good soundtrack, and she sent me a clip with a nostalgic song that sent her back to a time before the life she has now. It made me want to watch the series, and I’ve been crying for the last few days 😅 There are a lot of songs from my youth on the soundtrack that came out before these kids were even born, but there’s also entirely too many Taylor Swift songs (I googled why because it was a ridiculous amount). It’s an otherwise heartbreaking coming-of-age story about falling in love for the first time and the grief that comes with it.

Clipse?! Is it 2002?! 😜

The last time I saw Incubus was at this same venue nearly two decades ago (@ North Island Credit Union Amphitheatre when it was formerly known as Coors Amphitheatre, and has since been called Cricket Wireless Amphitheatre, Sleep Train Amphitheatre, and Mattress Firm Amphitheatre).

The difference between then and now is I’ve got money to buy front row VIP tickets now, their bass player has changed twice, and Brandon Boyd’s voice isn’t as strong as it used to be (he still fine, though!) 😜

I didn’t realize it was the last show on their tour. I recently saw that they canceled their show in LA, but it wasn’t until October, and it was at Intuit Dome (the new Clippers stadium) which I’ve heard lots of venue complaints about. I was just checking my email Saturday afternoon (hours before the show), and I saw an email from stubhub sent that morning that the SD show was canceled!

I couldn’t find any info online, Incubus posted nothing about the cancellation on their instagram, Ticketmaster was still selling tickets to the show, and I tried calling the venue, but it was all automated.

I finally found someone asking about it on Reddit:

Then, I got this email from Stubhub around 6pm telling me to enjoy the show!

They didn’t even send an email in between retracting the first email or saying it was sent in error. My sister lives like 15 minutes away from the venue, so we would’ve done a drive by to make sure if we didn’t get confirmation, but some people traveled from out of town for this show! Fucking Stubhub. My animosity towards them goes back more than a decade over a Beyoncé concert at Staples Center (I will never call it ‘Crypto.com Arena’).

You wrap around me and you give me life
And that’s why night after night I’ll be fuckin’ you right

My dear friend and her husband (who’s in town from the east coast to watch a BTS member’s concert and attend the World of Dance Summit) are staying at my apartment this weekend which brought up some questions:

1. Do I like BTS now??? 😳
2. Are they gonna fuck on my bed while I’m in SD for the Incubus show? 😅

Like the cashier at the Hustler adult store downtown once told someone I know (who was shopping for a vibrator and still living with her parents at the time), ‘DISCRETION IS KEY’ 😅

If they would’ve just acted normal, they wouldn’t have been outed. The company they work for is based in NYC, and the concert was in Boston. They’re not famous, so I don’t think anyone would’ve recognized them.

This was all my coworkers could talk about (and Silvia’s birthday LOL):

My pops called me yesterday because his HP Smart app on his computer wasn’t opening and he had to scan some documents. This was how our convo went:

Me: IDK how to help you with that.
Dad: But you installed it.
Me: When? Like 10 years ago???

I just walked him through taking pictures of the documents on his phone, then attaching the photos on an email from his phone. His navy friend told him that the VA will pay for you to take college classes plus pay you $2500 a month on top of that for 4 years and give you a laptop. He’s retired, so he wants to fill his time and make some extra cash money, too. So he’s submitting paperwork for that.

I was like, ‘You could not pay me to go back to school!’ You guys, I was the only one of my friends who didn’t graduate high school in white (an honor student I was not), I took a single AP class my senior year (statistics) and failed the AP test miserably, I took classes at every single community college in SD before transferring to SDSU where I only went for a year before I left to go to The Art Institute (which has since closed down), and I didn’t finish, but I left with $80K in student loan debt 😅 (which I’ve since paid off, because you don’t need a degree to be a successful graphic designer).

Anyway, if anyone knows how to fix the HP Smart app on an old PC, please help my dad because this B-sian ain’t the one 😆

(via @incredibleasfck)

BRB crying.

In unrelated news, I started my period today.

(via @jonncult)

Gigi Perez – Sailor Song

And then, she came up to my knees
Begging, ‘Baby, would you please?
Do the things you said you’d do to me, to me?’
Oh, won’t you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor?
When you get a taste, can you tell me what’s my flavor?
I don’t believe in God, but I believe that you’re my savior
I know that you’ve been worried, but you’re dripping in my favor
And when we’re getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong
I sleep so I can see you ’cause I hate to wait so long

I heard this song on KROQ and shazam’d it. I saw that I had already shazam’d this same song earlier this week! When I got home, I googled the song and was surprised it was sung by a woman. She sounds very masculine and the song is about a woman, but it turns out she’s a lesbian 😆 It’s like when I first heard The Mars Volta, and thought they were women!

The Mars Volta – The Widow

Freeze without an answer
Free from all the shame
Then I’ll hide
‘Cause I’ll never, never sleep alone

They opened for Deftones at their show earlier this year in LA, but I was in Japan. The last time I saw The Mars Volta live was nearly two decades ago at SDSU, and I have yet to see Deftones live 😢

(via @sandiegomag)

Home for the weekend ✌🏼 (@ Gaylord Pacific Resort & Convention Center)

One thing about me, I’m a vodka seltzer girlie whenever I’m in the pool. If I’m the only adult, I make sure the kiddos all know how to swim before auntie gets her seltzer on 😜

I went to the resort with my bathing suit already on (and my bathing suit has a built-in bra), so I forgot to pack my regular bra. I showed up at breakfast the next morning in my bathing suit with a sheer cover up over it and my sunglasses on to block the haters 😎 I expected to see some other people wearing their bathing suits (people come to this hotel for the pools), but I was literally the only one and severely underdressed 😅

My sister’s ex was there with his family, and I ran into his wife and kid when I went to the pool without my sister when she was back at the hotel room getting her rash guard. When I posted my story to IG about being there, an ex of mine DM’d me that he was there 2 weeks ago. Moral of the story: don’t go to the Gaylord Pacific in San Diego unless you want to run into your ex 😅

They have water slides, but I have an irrational fear of getting stuck in one and having to be cut out like Homer Simpson 😆

It’s v expensive to stay here ($500+ a night 😵‍💫), but it’s a Marriott hotel, so I’m down if anyone with Bonvoy points wants me to come float around the lazy river with them 😎

(via @manonmathews)

You don’t know wealth until you’ve milked a pecan.

Erewhon just opened a location up the street from me in Manhattan Beach. You guys, there’s a Trader Joe’s across the street from my apartment (plus two more within a 3-mile radius) and two Whole Foods within the same distance (the beach cities love their organic food). All that to say, I have options. So I won’t be hitting up Erewhon anytime soon for Hailey Bieber’s $20 Strawberry Glaze Skin Smoothie or new salt (enough of that old shit) 🤣

Avocado toast on homemade sourdough bread. Am I LA yet???

(via @lewky___)

The dating pool has pee in it 🫠

If I had a nickel for every time someone asked me what color my nipples were, I’d have two nickels 😅 At least I can rub those two nickels together and wish for a decent guy…

Full moon + Moo Deng’s 1st birthday + Deftones released their first single in 5 years today… What a time to be alive ✨

Yeah Yeah Yeahs (@ The Orpheum Theatre)

Wait, they don’t love you like I love you

When LA’s oldest resto is closing its doors for good after 117 years, you go for one last french dip (@ Cole’s French Dip)

This is what I picture my sister doing when she’s home alone 😆

In reality, she’s wearing her light therapy mask, watching Harry Potter, in bed by 9pm, and surpassing me in Royal Kingdom 👑

Good things come to those who bake ✨

POV: When you work from your sister’s rooftop* 🙌🏼

Pammie’s husband is in Vegas and her work trip got canceled, so I stayed at her house in San Diego a few extra days. I’m going back to LA tomorrow night, though, because I have a concert at The Orpheum on Wednesday.

*Yes, you can see Donovan State Prison from her rooftop, and yes, the Menendez brothers are incarcerated there. So is Suge Knight 😅

As a rule, I don’t eat baby animals (lamb, veal or suckling anything)—just adult animals who have lived a full life LOL. I also don’t eat pork anymore after playing with the mini pigs at mipig cafe in Japan. According to Google, cornish game hens are slaughtered at 4-5 weeks of age, so they’re off limits for me. My mom loves cornish game hens, though, so I air-fried her some following this easy recipe.

Actual footage of me rubbing their raw tiny bodies with spices:

Beer, buddies, and beer buddies (@ Pizza Port)

Homemade sourdough bread is my love language 💕

(Yes, BBQ is also my love language. And so are gift bags. Your girl is hella lingual.)

You guys, I think I’ve perfected the art of making sourdough bread. My first bread tasted good, but didn’t rise as much as it should’ve. I googled and found out that feeding my starter whole wheat flour instead of bread flour might remedy that, and it totally worked! I got so much height in these new loaves, they look like the bread bowls we used to eat clam chowder out of at Boudin!

Since Christine is the one who suggested I start making sourdough, I gave her a loaf, along with her favorite garlic dip from Del Mar Fair, and some Milky tablets because this girl eats dairy like she’s not lactose intolerant as fuck 😅

I usually start my 4th of July morning by watching Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. Last year, Joey Chestnut, who’s won every year since I started watching this contest over a decade ago (except The Great Upset of 2015 when he lost to Matt Stonie), was disqualified from competing because he had a sponsorship with Impossible Foods, and Nathan’s considered it a conflict of interest. Apparently, he’s signed a deal with Nathan’s since then, and was able to compete this year. I didn’t know he was competing, so I skipped the live competition in the morning. Luckily, ESPN showed reruns throughout the day 😆 Anyway, Joey Chestnut reclaimed the Mustard Belt, of course! I went to Nathan’s at Coney Island the last time I was in NYC, but I would love to watch the hot dog eating contest in person one day 🌭✨

My sister’s rooftop has a perfect view of the fireworks from the Olympic Training Center. Apologies for the Katy Perry song—I had to cover up the audio of my mom’s sister singing God Bless America LOL (IDK which is worse, TBH).

(via @buzzfeed)

(via Netflix Is A Joke)

If the President of the United States dies, resigns, or is removed from office, the Vice President automatically becomes President. If the Vice President is also unable to serve, the Speaker of the House then becomes President. After the Speaker, the President Pro Tempore of the Senate and then the heads of the cabinet departments in order of their agencies’ creation would follow in the line of succession.

Here’s the breakdown of the current presidential line of succession (along with links to unsavory articles about 99% of them):

1. Vice President: JD Vance 🤢 (I don’t have the bandwidth to list everything I despise about this man, just google his ass)
2. Speaker of the House of Representatives: Mike Johnson 🤢 (said California Governor Newsom should be ‘tarred and feathered’ for his opposition of Trump sending the National Guard and Marines to LA during the ICE protests)
3. President Pro Tempore of the Senate: Chuck Grassley 🤢 (he’s in his fucking 90s!)
4. Secretary of State: Marco Rubio 🤢
5. Secretary of the Treasury: Scott Bessent 🤢 (gay and married and had children through a surrogate, yet has not said one word about Trump’s anti-gay and anti-women’s reproductive rights agenda)
6. Secretary of Defense: Pete Hegseth 🤢
7. Attorney General: Pam Bondi 🤢
8. Secretary of the Interior: Doug Burgum 🤢 (he wants to drill oil on protected lands and doesn’t consider climate change an ‘existential threat’)
9. Secretary of Agriculture: Brooke Rollins 🤢
10. Secretary of Commerce: Howard Lutnick 🤢 (said the ridiculously high tariffs on foreign countries won’t matter ‘if you build in America and produce your product in America’ and his flabbers were gasted when congresswoman Madeleine Dean said, ‘We cannot build bananas in America’)
11. Secretary of Labor: Lori Chavez-DeRemer (A pro-union republican? Isn’t that an oxymoron?)
12. Secretary of Health and Human Services: Robert F. Kennedy 🤢 (an anti-vaxxer in charge of America’s health!)
13. Secretary of Housing and Urban Development: Scott Turner (I searched everywhere for a negative article about this man, but his only fault is that he used to play in the NFL for the San Diego Chargers 😆)
14. Secretary of Transportation: Sean Duffy 🤢 (a frat boy from MTV’s The Real World: Boston. True story!)
15. Secretary of Energy: Chris Wright 🤢 (doesn’t believe in renewable energy, and continues to push the use of coal, oil and gas)
16. Secretary of Education: Linda Mcmahon 🤢 (wants to privatize public schools)
17. Secretary of Veterans Affairs: Doug Collins 🤢 (plans to cut 80,000 jobs at the Department of Veteran’s Affairs. My dad and uncles are veterans, and it already takes forever for their claims to go through. How is cutting 80k jobs from the VA workforce gonna help that???)
18. Secretary of Homeland Security: Kristi Noem 🤢 (I can’t fucking stand this woman and her ICE commercials. If the 17 people before her die, and she’s appointed president, we’re cooked)

God help America 🇺🇸

Where’s the lie??? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Follow @timurgabriel for more beauty tips 😆

Bread Head and beach day 🏖️

What is even happening??? 🤯

(via @louislevanti)

This dip did not ‘slap my ass’ LOL.

I was so excited when Nori sent me this video, that we went to Trader Joe’s during lunch so I could pick up this dip (along with a bunch of other shit).

I found the dip a little bland. I’ve also had Trader Joe’s Buffalo Chicken Dip before and was underwhelmed. Everyone and their mama who went feral over this dip has obviously never had the garlic dip at Chicken Dijon. It’s Last Meal worthy. I’m not a food snob (Nori and I have the 3-for-me special at Chili’s once a week!), but I know good food, and this Trader Joe’s dip ain’t it.

The bestie took me to Cracker Barrel once, and her husband loves the french toast there and had me try some of his. It tasted like the basic ass french toast I could make at home!

The best french toast I ever had was at this french resto in LA, République. They add an automatic 4% service charge to your bill to cover their employees’ health benefits, which I’m usually so against (I think I’m paying enough for this overpriced albeit delicious kouign-amann), but the food is so good.

Anyway, save your money on this Trader Joe’s dip 😆 Or better yet, come visit me and I’ll take you to Chicken Dijon for their much superior garlic dip.

I read somewhere that the #1 movie on your 10th birthday is how your 2025 is gonna go. Welp, it looks like I’ll be skipping the gyno this year 😅

I have a tiny ass kitchen. I’m taller than my fridge, I have a single-bowl sink, my stove/oven’s electric and only 24″ wide, and there’s barely any counter space. I just bought two more dutch ovens to bake sourdough in, and I have no where to store them.

My sister bought the biggest model home in her community, so she has a gourmet kitchen with all Kitchen-Aid appliances, two full size ovens, a convection microwave, a wine fridge, a dishwasher, a double-bowl sink, a huge quartz island counter, a Kangen Water System… You could fit 9 of my kitchens in her kitchen 😅 I do all my baking at her house, and I keep a lot of my appliances there, too—my Vitamix, slow cooker, Japanese knife set, dutch oven (plus the two I just bought), charcuterie boards, cookie sheets…

I’ve lived in this studio for over a decade, and it might be time to move into a place with a bigger kitchen. Maybe even a place with a bedroom 😜 My friends from the east coast are visiting LA in a couple weeks, and they asked to stay at my apartment while they’re here. I don’t mind, of course, but they’ve been to my apartment before so they know it’s gonna be tight. Plus, they’re a couple and I only have one bed. I was like, ‘Someone’s gonna have to sleep on the couch. What side of the bed does your husband sleep on?’ 😜

On Sundays, we bake sourdough! He is risen 🙌🏼

When I first moved to LA, I worked with this guy from SF who made his own sourdough. He would bring a homemade sandwich to work every day for lunch, and as the days passed, his sandwich would get smaller and smaller as he got towards the end of the loaf 😂 We only worked together a few months before his dad passed away and he moved back to his hometown to help out his mom, but I still think about him and his little sandwiches whenever I have sourdough 🥹

Update: You guys, it turned out sooo good. We already ate half the loaf! My sister’s husband said he’s gonna slang it at the farmer’s market and Chel said she’ll sell her earl grey calamansi juice (that she makes from the calamansi tree in her backyard) and we can go halfsies on a booth 😆

I was weary because I haven’t had much luck with yeasted doughs in the past—the first (and last!) time I made babka, I was in tears because I started so late in the evening and didn’t know the dough had to rise multiple times. I finished at like 3 in the morning and was so tired. Now, whenever I’m super tired, I say I’m ‘babka tired’, and my sister knows I’m not fucking around. I also tried to make homemade cinnamon rolls from scratch once, and it just didn’t rise like it was supposed to. Now I just use the pop tube cinnamon rolls and do the TikTok hack for it to taste homemade 🤪

Anyway, this is the first of many homemade sourdough loaves to come!

I have two sourdough starters that I feed daily – regular and gluten-free (for my seester). To differentiate between the two (the regular starter is fed with whole wheat flour while the gluten-free one is fed with brown rice flour), I’ve added pictures of the Property Brothers to the lids of the jars (since that’s who the starters are named after). Jonathan is regular and Drew is gluten-free, obvi 😆

Fun fact: I just googled, and Drew actually follows a gluten-free diet!

Few things make me happier than seeing a dog in a car while stuck in traffic…

Except seeing two dogs in one car 🥰✌🏼

May this kind of magic find me ♥️

I was at my old friend Kelley’s apartment in the mid-2000s, and we were perusing Craigslist’s Missed Connections ads LOL and stumbled upon a post that was about her! She would roller skate around her complex with her dog, and someone described a girl who looked like Punky Brewster LOL (she totally had Soleil Moon Frye vibes) rollerskating with a dog around Mission Valley 😅

I used to watch her dog when she’d go out of town, and he was the goodest boi. That had to have been nearly 20 years ago, and my parents still talk about him to this day 🥹

I used to have this picure of him printed out on photo paper and pinned up in my office cube like he was my dog 😆

I would take Rocky to her apartment for play dates, and I found him in one of Kelley’s pictures of Q 😭 Q always froze in place whenever you’d try to put clothes on him 😆

This hat was Q’s, but Kelley gave it to Rocky because he didn’t mind wearing clothes 😆

IDK if this is true or if I’m even headed to heaven LOL, but it’s a nice thought. I would love to see these sweet boys again 🥹

(via @terzmyio)

(via @mickthomascomedy)

I had on the true crime channel in the background while I worked, and there was a docu of a lady that had been murdered. I didn’t blink an eye when they said that she had been fatally stabbed 80 times, but I audibly gasped when they said her dog was also stabbed once but survived 😅

Update: It was sad to hear that a gunman (posing as law enforcement!) fatally shot Democratic leader and Minnesota House Speaker Melissa Hortman and her husband in their home, but I just saw he also wounded their beloved Golden Retriever, Gilbert, so bad that the dog had to be put down because of his injuries 😭 Minnesota doesn’t have the death penalty, but exceptions are made for federal cases. This asshole deserves nothing less than death by firing squad 🖕🏼