I Amazon Primed this full-sized skeleton with plans to propel it from my new apartment’s balcony, but I had it delivered to my sister’s house bc I was down there for my dad’s birthday.
I picked the busiest month to move cities – With so many birthdays to celebrate, I’ve been driving back and forth to SD. It’s also MLB playoff season, but the Padres snipped that in the butt real quick LOL
(I can never say ‘nipped it in the bud’ correctly after seeing this LOL)
Anyway, I’ve been busy packing up my apartment that I’ve lived in for 13 years, trying to sell my furniture on FB Marketplace and fielding inquiries from mostly flakes, making all the arrangements so I’ll have wifi and all the necessary utilities at the new apartment, I just found out the most senior web designer after me is going on medical leave, so I’m busier at work than usual, and on top of that, it’s frickin’ Halloween and I’m stretched too thin to be the fun, spooky auntie this year 🎃
When I said I was moving downtown, more than a few people were concerned about the homeless population in the area. IDK if it’s bc I grew up in the hood (Paradise Hills LOL) or bc I’ve been living alone in LA for the last 13 years, but homeless or erratic people don’t bother me. I was at a bar in Chicago with Donna and Pammie, and this crazy homeless dude was being crazy and the bartender was like, ‘You need to leave’ and Donna and I were just sipping our drinks without a care in the world, but Pammie was on high alert LOL. I guess I could be a little bit more situationally aware. I’ve only been at my new building in the daytime, and I saw one homeless person at the bakery on the same block. He was just asking people for food and wasn’t being aggressive, but he was told to leave, too.
You need a code to get into my new building, a code to use the elevator, even a code to get into my apartment (it’s keyless entry), plus there’s security at night.
I’ll be safe, guys. But if you don’t see me blog for a while, check the local news bc I’ve likely been murdered by a homeless person I befriended 😅
My new apartment has its own washer/dryer – a luxury I’ve never had! I’m so glad I won’t have to deal with this bullshit much longer. Sometimes, when I need to wash bulky items like bedding, I go to the laundromat up the street. Last time I was there, some asshole hit my parked car as I was sitting inside of it waiting for my shit to dry 🤬
I might have to rebrand my coin jar and give it to my sister since I won’t be needing quarters anymore 😂
She recently had a Halloween festival at her work where her group’s table was Harry Potter themed (her idea, of course).
Coworker: Wow, you guys must’ve had a big budget! Pammie: Nah, I just brought some stuff from home 😅
My building manager (Michael Douglas LOL) let me post this flyer in the lobby, but a tracker on the QR code tells me only one person has scanned it 😅 I also listed everything on FB Marketplace, and was able to get rid of one item, despite several flaky people inquiring if multiple listings were still available 😵💫
Random shit I found while packing up my apartment:
My Chargers Merriman jersey – It’s the only football jersey I have! I bought it before Merriman famously choked Tila Tequila and before the Chargers left San Diego, but regrettably not before he got that stupid ‘Lights Out’ tattoo on his forearm.
Relics from Covid – A bag full of masks, gloves, and sanitizer
Joints from my uncle – He has sciatica and grows his own weed
Souvies from The Museum of Broken Relationships in Hollywood (that has since closed down) – A box of matches that say, ‘May the bridges I burn light the way,’ tissues for crying, and a mini notebook titled ‘Regrets’ 😆
Flipbooks from Jessie and Abe’s wedding 10 years ago
Magazines from when Prince and Paul Walker died (2016 and 2013, respectively)
A gift card that my boss gave me for Two Guns Espresso – It’s since closed down bc they’re building a luxury senior village in that plaza LOL. There’s another location, but IDK if the gift card is good there.
File under ‘Things I’m doing instead of packing’: Eating cold pizza and Google street viewing my new apartment to see if you can see my balcony from the street, so I can decide whether or not to Amazon Prime that life-sized skeleton in my cart.
I’m abandoning my clear obsession with Mid-Century furniture (JK, I’m just moving to another apartment and buying new Mid-Century furniture that fits the space better). Anyone interested in buying some of it? Everything comes fully assembled, if that helps sway your decision at all – If you’d rather test your relationship by trying to assemble furniture together, I’ll just pray for you, I guess 🙏🏼
Full disclosure: All items are pick-up only in LA (Redondo Beach). I live on the third floor of my building, but there’s an elevator. You’ll need a second person to help you carry most of this shit to your car, so please bring a friend bc I ain’t the one 😅 Prices are already heavily discounted and firm.
West Elm Mid-Century Adjustable Curtain RodSOLD!
Price: $60 (retails for $149)
Condition: Like new. Put it up once and never touched it again. Smoke-free home.
Dimensions: 44″-108″
Finish: Carbon/Antique Brass
West Elm White Sheer European Flax Linen Curtains, Set of 4
Price: $100 for the set of 4 (retails for $436)
Condition: Like new. Smoke-free, pet-free home. No stains. Freshly laundered.
Dimensions: Each panel – 48″ (W) x 89″ (L) (originally 96″ L, but professionally tailored to 89″ L with tags kept on)
Features: Woven from premium flax and washed for a luxe, lived-in look. Adds lightweight texture to windows. Soft drapery lets in bright, gently diffused light. Crafted in a Fair Trade Certified™ facility.
Nathan James Tamlin Wall Light Fixture (comes with light bulb)
Price: $40 (retails for $75.99)
Condition: Like new. Smoke-free home.
Features: Renters rejoice! Meet Tamlin, our plug-in wall light perfect for reading nooks, living rooms, and bedsides. Extending from a circular wall plate is an elegant vintaged brass finish metal arm with a matte black round bell shade. Its articulating feature allows you to direct the light left or right and is dimmer compatible, for those nights you can’t put your book down. This wall light is a must-have for small spaces, apartments, and townhomes and can be placed in your favorite spot without worry thanks to the included cord cover.
Finish: Antique Brass/Matte Black
Boho Driftwood Macrame Wall Hanging
Price: $40 (retails for $70)
Condition: New. Never been used.
Features: Hanging length is easily adjustable
Dimensions: 32″ (W) x 15″ (H)
Ikea Mongstad Mirror
Price: $80 (retailed for $200 – now discontinued and highly coveted according to the internet)
Condition: Like new. Put it up once and never touched it again. Smoke-free home.
Dimensions: 37″ (H) x 75″ (W) x 2″ (D)
Features: This large versatile mirror can be used in several ways. You can lean it against a wall or hang it both vertically or horizontal. I hung it horizontally with two screws and a prayer, and it has stayed up for 13 years through several California earthquakes.
Walker Edison Xuma Modern Armless Low Back Counter Stool, Set of 2SOLD!
Price: $60 for set (retails for $159)
Condition: Like new. Used mostly for decor only.
Features: Upholstered in high-quality synthetic leather for a stylish and easy-to-clean finish. Sturdy steel legs provide reliable support and enhance the modern design.
Dimensions: 34 1/2″ (H) x 19″ (W) x 22″ (D)
West Elm Curved Terrace NightstandSOLD!
Price: $100 (retailed for $199, now discontinued)
Condition: Like new. Smoke-free home.
Dimensions: 24″ (H) x 19″ (W) x 15″ (D)
Features: The goes-with-anything Antique Brass finish is easy to integrate into modern and traditional decors alike. This airy nightstand’s bottom shelf is mirrored, reflecting up toward the wide, tempered glass top.
Opalhouse Mid-Century Touraco Dresser
Price: $100 (retailed for $260 unassembled – now discontinued)
Condition: Top wood has imperfections on the bottom right where my iPad got stuck to it on a hot summer day 🤪 (shown above), but you can cover the top with a cool Mexican blanket like I have 💃🏻 Otherwise in great condition.
Features: Decorative 3-drawer dresser keeps things stored in style. White and brown colors create an eye-catching look perfect for any space. Neutral colors blend seamlessly with any color scheme.
Condition: Barely used, was mostly for decor only, wood has normal wear and tear
Features: Molded plywood shell crafted from natural real veneer Walnut. The molded shape is designed for comfort, with dense 1″ thick foam pads providing extra comfort with a low profile. Padding is upholstered in genuine Harris Tweed in Sunshine Yellow. The base is made from welded steel fabricated in-house, powder-coated in satin black. The solid wood rocker skids are durable and crafted from solid wood for a smooth rocking motion.
Dimensions: 35″ (H) x 30″ (W) x 30″ (D)
Mid-Century Modern Side Table
Price: $60
Condition: Like new
Features: Made in LA. Brown wood with 12″ hairpin legs made of welded steel.
Dimensions: (Overall) 19″ (H) x 20″ (W) x 14.5″ (D)
Condition: New in opened box, never been used. Smoke-free home.
Features: Large 31″ Round Frame – This spacious round wall shelf lets you display photos, candles, and plants without clutter, helping you keep your room stylish and organized. Natural Bamboo & Wood Build – Crafted with eco-friendly bamboo and wood, this boho wall decor adds warmth and texture while providing durable wood wall storage. Versatile Home & Office Use – Whether mounted in a bedroom, living room, or office, this round wall shelf enhances any space with charm and practical functionality. Two-Tier Storage Design – With two wide shelves, this bamboo shelf solves the problem of small-space storage, giving you plenty of room for daily essentials or decor. Timeless Boho Style – The handcrafted woven look and natural brown finish offer a unique boho wall decor piece that effortlessly uplifts modern, rustic, or eclectic interiors.
Dimensions: 31″ (H) x 31″ (W) x 5″ (D)
LG Smart Dual Inverter Portable Air Conditioner with 10000 BTU Cooling Capacity, 500 sq. ft. Cooling Area, in White with Sliding Door Kit
Price: $300 includes sliding door kit (retails for $649 without sliding door kit)
Condition: Like new
Features: Saved my life during The Great Heat Wave of 2022. Works fast to cool down my 500 sq. ft. studio. The LG DUAL Inverter air conditioners are the best in cooling innovation. This ultra quiet unit operates at 44 dB in sleep mode, almost as quiet as a library. In addition, the DUAL Inverter allows the unit to operate efficiently saving you as much as 40% on energy costs. 3 cooling and fan speeds and a 24 hour timer allow you to create a cooling schedule to suit your needs. The auto-swing air vent helps direct the flow of air where It is needed most whether cooling, dehumidifying or just circulating air. If there is a power outage, the auto restart feature will automatically turn your unit back on when power is restored. Other features include a remote control, easy rolling casters, removable/washable filter and a check filter alert.
Dimensions: 30.43″ (H) x 19.41″ (W) x 18.11″ (D)
Ikea Kivik Sectional Sofa
Price: $300 (retails for $1399 unassembled)
Condition: Used, but still firm. Some light discoloration in the fabric on the bottom right corner of the chaise (pictured)
Features: Very comfortable. Guests say it’s more comfortable to sleep on than most beds! Can be disassembled for easier transport. The chaise can be separated from the two-seat piece, and so can both arm rests on either side. Since chaise can be separated, it can go on the left or right side of the sofa, whichever suits your space best. Fabric covers are removable, machine washable, and can be changed. Pet and smoke-free home.
Dimensions: 32 5/8″ (H) x 110 1/4″ (W) x 64 1/8″ (D)
This is how the sofa arrives if you order it unassembled from Ikea. You’re welcome.
A bed frame was just delivered to my new next door neighbor’s apartment. Any inkling he lived with a woman is now null and void, bc a woman would never sleep on a mattress on the floor for 2 weeks.
(Instead of straight up asking him if he’s single like a normal person, I like to create my own narrative based on assumptions).
My next door neighbor moved out. She was so quiet, I don’t think she even had a TV. I wouldn’t hear her for weeks at a time, and I’d think she was dead if she didn’t have regular Chewy deliveries at her door (she had a cat who was also quiet as fuck). When I was leaving today, I saw her door open and her apartment empty. I hope she just moved out and didn’t die in there 😅
I’ve lived in this building for 13 years, so I’ve seen a lot of people come and go. My neighbor on the other side of me has lived here longer than me (what’s good, Gloria? 😆 she’s also v quiet). My neighbor across the hall is my building manager (his name is Michael Douglas LOL no relation to the actor), and he and his wife have a golden retriever and are pretty quiet.
When they were removing the popcorn from my ceiling and remodeling my bathroom, I stayed in a vacant apartment on another floor on the other side of the building and it was so loud—people would take calls in the hallway, tenants would fuck with their windows open, someone would play an actual piano… I work from home, so I hear everything. Most of the people who have lived in the apartment next door have been quiet… except this one dude who also worked from home so he was there all day, and mounted his TV to our shared wall, and it was so loud, I could hear what he was watching. He was blasting it at 2am on a weeknight and I couldn’t take it anymore, so I rang his doorbell at 2am, woke up his dogs, and woke him up apparently, because he was sleeping with his loud ass TV on!
Hopefully, whoever moves in next door is more mindful of their neighbors (me LOL). It’s a studio identical to mine, if anyone’s looking for a rental in the South Bay and has $2,350 to spare each month 😅 I’m a great neighbor—I don’t own a TV (just a projector with a soundbar that’s far away from any shared walls), I don’t have a piano or any instruments, and I don’t fuck with my windows open (my windows don’t open 😜).
I have a tiny ass kitchen. I’m taller than my fridge, I have a single-bowl sink, my stove/oven’s electric and only 24″ wide, and there’s barely any counter space. I just bought two more dutch ovens to bake sourdough in, and I have no where to store them.
My sister bought the biggest model home in her community, so she has a gourmet kitchen with all Kitchen-Aid appliances, two full size ovens, a convection microwave, a wine fridge, a dishwasher, a double-bowl sink, a huge quartz island counter, a Kangen Water System… You could fit 9 of my kitchens in her kitchen 😅 I do all my baking at her house, and I keep a lot of my appliances there, too—my Vitamix, slow cooker, Japanese knife set, dutch oven (plus the two I just bought), charcuterie boards, cookie sheets…
I’ve lived in this studio for over a decade, and it might be time to move into a place with a bigger kitchen. Maybe even a place with a bedroom 😜 My friends from the east coast are visiting LA in a couple weeks, and they asked to stay at my apartment while they’re here. I don’t mind, of course, but they’ve been to my apartment before so they know it’s gonna be tight. Plus, they’re a couple and I only have one bed. I was like, ‘Someone’s gonna have to sleep on the couch. What side of the bed does your husband sleep on?’ 😜
It’s a bit much, but so is this house. Also, I don’t half-ass anything—I always use my full ass 😜
Pammie gave me full creative control over the Halloween decorations at her house, as long as it was Harry Potter themed.
We started it last weekend, but needed to order more supplies, so we finished it this weekend. When I was leaving to go back to LA last Sunday, I was like, ‘Don’t finish it without me!’ and Pammie was like, ‘You had to twist my arm to help you while you were here, I’m def not gonna do it without you’ 😅
We followed this tutorial and it turned out so great!
Chel has this giant persimmon tree in her backyard that her mom planted when we were kids. Her mom passed away from cancer 20 years ago, and the house is Chel’s now. She doesn’t take care of this tree, but it continuous to flourish year after year. She always offers the fruit to my mom and our family, so we came over to pick some persimmons.
Chel was at Legoland with her kids, but she left the side gate unlocked so we could access the backyard, and some water and ciders in case we got thirsty. Always the hostess with the mostest, even when she’s not home 😆
A few years ago, my new neighbor hung a letter and bag of candy on everyone’s door introducing himself and his dog to the building. I remember throwing away the candy and thinking, ‘This is LA, man. We don’t do that here.’ LOL. I still don’t remember his name, but his frenchie’s name was Stella 😆
When I made the door hanger on my Cricut, I asked Pammie if she could help me weed it (the vinyl stickers). She was like, ‘I’m already disturbed. Please come in.’ I was like, ‘I know what it says… I said, ‘WEED’ it. Not read it.’ LMAO. I know I sound like a baby sometimes after having the stroke, but I haven’t developed an Elmer Fudd speech impediment. I can say ‘read’ 🤣
Anyway, I hope my Halloween decor thrills all my gentlemen callers doordash delivery guys 💀🖤
I was gonna buy a new oven a few years ago, because the one in my apartment is tiny and electric. But since I was in the market for an air fryer, I got this Breville Air Fryer Toaster Oven combo. I have zero counter space, though (the kitchen in my studio is smaller than my bathroom at my sister’s house LOL), so I have to set it on top of my oven 😅
The first thing I made in it was a personal pizza.
The power turned off a few times in the 15 minutes it took to cook the pizza, and I had to flip the switch in the circuit breaker a couple times. It probably couldn’t handle the A/C and oven on at the same time, but I was like, ‘Come on… Don’t make me choose between A/C and pizza.’ 😅
Yes, that’s turkey pepperoni and yes, I know I need to calm down on the olives 😜
My dad isn’t handy at all, so I’ve always built my own furniture and put shit together myself.
One time, I got this Article Caliper Shelf delivered to my apartment in LA. It was huge! I had to piece it out in the lobby, because the box wouldn’t fit in the elevator and I live on the third floor. Several of my neighbors offered to help, but I declined them all. As much as I would’ve loved the assistance, I hate being mansplained even more 😅 Plus, I wanted them to just think of me as ‘the nice, quiet girl in 332’ and I’ve seen putting furniture together test too many relationships!
It was worth it in the end, though. It’s one of my favorite pieces in my studio.
Pammie got a stand-up desk while I was in Spain, so I couldn’t put it together for her. She said it took her five days. When Shi found out, she was like, “Dennis didn’t help you?!” Apparently, it’s Shi’s husband’s job to do that kind of shit. But my sister’s husband is even less handy than she is, if you can believe it. Even though I don’t need a man to build furniture for me, I can’t imagine being married to someone who isn’t good with their hands 😏
All that to say, my sister ordered new mattresses and they’ve been sitting in her living room for weeks. They’re those adjustable ones where each side can sit up or lie down, so she also bought new bed frames that are adjustable. She has to break down her old bed frame and mattress and remove it, so she can put the new bed in her room. They were gonna get rid of their old mattress, but decided to keep it and put it in the guest bedroom where I sleep. I currently sleep on the full bed that came with the house (my sister got the model home). My feet hang over the end of the bed and I can literally feel every spring in the mattress 🥴 My sister’s old bed is memory foam and king-sized, so all my sleep-related problems would be solved 😅
Pammie hired the community handyman to break down her old bed and set up her new one, but he got sick the day he was supposed to come, then she came back from Vegas with Covid when he was rescheduled to come, and now she and her husband are vacationing in Hawaii.
Partly because I wanted to do something nice for my sister, but mostly because I’m tired of sleeping on this god awful bed, I broke down her old bed frame, set it back up in the guest room, and set up her new bed up in her room.
This memory foam cali king is nice, but I miss sleeping in my own bed. I have a nice pillow top dream cloud mattress at home, and a bed frame the delivery guys from CB2 assembled in less than 10 minutes.
I also set up Pammie’s Ring Video Doorbell that’s been collecting dust in her closet for 2 years. I’m only the best sister there ever was 😌
I wanted it to be a surprise when she came back from Hawaii, but I didn’t know where she kept the Ring or where the tools were to disassemble the bed. I was like, ‘Do you know where the 3/16-inch short arm hex key is? Also, what is a short arm hex key?’ 😆
I’m babka tired now, though… The first and only time I made babka, it turned out sooo good. But I didn’t realize how time consuming it was going to be (the dough has to rest and rise twice!), so I didn’t start till 11 at night. I was up at 3 in the morning tired as fuck and near tears (just kidding—I was openly sobbing). So whenever I’m exhausted now, I just say I’m ‘babka’ tired and Pammie knows I’m not fucking around 😴
Anyway, I just doordashed a pizza, so I’m gonna eat it and sleep for a gabillion years ✌🏻
Donna’s son, Elijah, is a champion pole vaulter and is trying to qualify for the olympics in 2028. The Olympic Training Center is near my sister’s house, so he’ll be staying at my sister’s while he trains there for the next few weeks. He’ll be staying in my room at their house while he’s there, so I came over to clean it up a bit. “Isn’t the cleaning lady coming tomorrow?” my dad asked. “Duh. That’s why I’m cleaning.” I’m the kind of person who clips my talons and pumices my feet before getting a pedicure, I’m def gonna tidy up my room and bathroom before the cleaning lady comes. What am I, an animal? 🤪 I mean, I am a little bit, but Leticia doesn’t need to know that…
My sister is the most technologically challenged person I know (right behind my dad), and one time we were up at my apartment in LA for a doctor’s appointment, and my wifi wasn’t working, and she had like a million zoom meetings to attend that day. I’m like, “Just use your phone as a hotspot.” “What’s a hotspot?” she says. I showed her how to use her phone as a hotspot, and I’m like, “Welcome to the 21st century!” LOL
I have a wireless laser color printer in my room at my sister’s, and I’m at my parents’ house right now, so I asked her to print some pictures of my parents’ bathroom for their remodel. I was surprised she was able to figure it out on her own.
Another time, Shi was helping me with this wedding invitation order and she was using a corner punch to round all the corners. She was like, “All done!” I see a sharp, unrounded corner, and I’m like, “What’s this little guy?” We were at the cafe inside Borders, and we couldn’t stop laughing, we were so loud.
I went with my parents to a showroom this morning because they’re remodeling their bathroom and wanted my opinion on materials. My sister’s husband was like, “That’s what you get for being so stylish,” and my sister was like, “Notice they didn’t ask me to come.” 😅 My sister’s the kind of person who buys the model home so it’s already fully furnished and decorated, whereas I’m really particular about what goes in my studio, and it’s just a rental. I tried three mattresses before I settled on one. I once made my family drive me to the West Elm in Solana Beach because I just had to have this mid century nightstand, and they were the only location in SoCal that had it in stock. Every year, I say I’m gonna enter Apartment Therapy’s Small/Cool Contest (my apartment’s only 450 square feet!), but the contest always happens when I’m really busy at work. And every year, when they announce the grand prize winner, I’m always like, “My apartment’s cuter than that.” When I helped my sister paint her last condo, we went to Lowe’s and she picked a color within minutes. I was like, “Wait, don’t you want to look at all these paint chips (for a few more hours)?” She was like, “Game-time decision, Mayan!” And I’m like, “I don’t understand your sports references.” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Anyway, since they made me get up butt crack early, I had them stop by Mcdonald’s for breakfast. I was waiting in the lobby for my food, and this old lady hobbles over to this other old lady with her cane and asks her how she’s doing and I thought she knew her, but she asked her name and told her she had a beautiful smile. Then the other lady asked her how she was doing, and she said, “I’m alive and able to walk on my own two feet. It’s a beautiful day!” And I cried into my vanilla iced coffee and drank my tears 😭
Don’t mind my emo ass, I think I’m getting my period 😅
Update: The red devil is, in fact, in my belly. I’d stay away from this hot mess express for the next 3-5 days.
When we stayed at The Plaza in NYC, I kept commenting on how good it smelled. I found out they sell their signature scent online, and I had to get it. Now it smells like The Plaza up in this bitch.
My parents have these shelves of knick knacks that they keep the phone chargers on, and as we were checking up on their house while they’re away on their cruise (not sure what we were checking for as they have an alarm system and cameras), I was staring at these little cups on the shelves. “B” & “S” for my parents, Ben & Shirley, “P” & “D” for my sister, Pammie and her husband, Dennis, and “M” & “R”… The “M” was for Marion, but what the hell was the “R” for? My sister saw me looking at them and was like, “R for Rocky!” Oh, duh. Of course my mom would get one for our beloved dog who died five years ago LOL.
My sister had a real Christmas tree last year, but didn’t want to deal with vacuuming all the needles and having to trash it afterwards again, so she got this artificial one.
She and her husband love the real tree smell, though, so I got some fraser fir fragrance oil for my scent diffuser, and now it smells like Christmas up in this bitch.
FYI if you didn’t already know, my sister is a Potterhead.
R.I.P. to my fiddle leaf fig bush. It’s in a self-watering pot, but you have to refill it with water once a month, and I haven’t been in my apartment since August 😅
My sister’s elevator has been broken since June. She already reported the elevator company to the Better Business Bureau, because they’ve canceled several appointments to fix it and keep making excuses. I’m like, “Where am I? My apartment in LA???” When I first moved into my building, the elevator was broken, and I live on the top floor. The building owner and landlord at the time assured me that the elevator was in the process of getting fixed. When my new neighbor saw the movers carrying stuff up the stairs to my apartment, he told me that the elevator had been broken for 10 months. Then, when I tried to take a shower after a long day of moving, I had no hot water! I had to shower in a vacant apartment on a different floor on the other side of the building for weeks until they fixed it. My old landlord was such a dick (yeah, I’m talking to you, Leonard!). My building has since been sold to a new owner, so I have a much nicer landlord now, the elevator works, I have hot water, and they even removed my popcorn ceiling and renovated my bathroom.
The only reason my sister bought a 4-story house was because it came with an elevator. She originally wanted a ranch-style, 1-story house with no stairs (she also said she’d never live below the 8), but here we are ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I can see the prison from her private rooftop!
The good thing about the elevator being broken is it forces me to use the stairs. My onion booty has turned to an office ass over the years from working a desk job, and now it’s starting to shape up again 😅
I got this bloody bath mat partly because I almost slipped and broke my neck after my shower, but mostly because I’m morbid as hell. Should I get this shower curtain set to complete the look???
Yeah, I don’t know why I’m single, either ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I just need to find someone I can be myself around 🤣
I’m up in LA for a doctor’s appointment, and I haven’t been home in over a month.
I should really give someone a key to my apartment, because all my plants are dead.
People think it’s silly that I kept my studio in LA (and continue to pay a ridiculous amount for it) since I haven’t lived there since January after the incident, but I like my independence (and walking around in my chonies.). I’d sublet my apartment, but my property manager lives across the hall, so he’d definitely know 😅
– my sister’s husband to me after I brought down my Aroma 360 diffuser and Cashmere Plum fragrance oil from my studio in LA for my room at their house in SD
I woke up to the sound of my fridge struggling this morning, and when I opened my freezer, everything was melted inside! R.I.P. to an embarrassing amount of ice cream, plus that lone pepperoni pizza hot pocket I was saving for later.
Update: It’s now Friday and I’m going on day 3 of not having a fridge. Luckily, Chel sent me this song of the day to cheer me up while I write my landlord another strongly worded email and cry into my room temperature bottled water 😭
Welp, it’s officially been two years since I started working from home for what was supposed to be a two-week stint! Since then, I’ve put in countless hours of overtime and started taking serotonin supplements if that’s any indication of how life is going so far 😅
Kicking off spooky season with some light reading…
Unsolicited fact about me:Beetlejuice is one of my favorite movies. It was one of the only VHS tapes my grandma had when I was a kid, so I’d watch it over and over again. My boss calls me ‘Morbid Marion’ and I think Lydia Deetz would be proud 🖤
Finally an office with a window! I could get used to working from home…
Now if I only had a bidet, a lifetime subscription to Freshly, and a peloton bike, I’d never have to leave my apartment! Just kidding (like I would ever use a peloton bike).
After my ceiling sprung several leaks, my landlord had our roof fixed and offered to remove that god awful popcorn ceiling. I even got him to remodel my bathroom and repaint my entire apartment while he was at it!
S/O to all those LA storms for making this home reno possible…
I’ve been off the grid for a few weeks while my place was getting renovated, but it was def worth the wait! Lots to catch up on (Shi’s wedding, Jessie’s birthday, and all the BBQ I ate in between), but first I gotta shower in my new tub and make my bracket picks…
It rained all weekend, so I stayed in and Marie Kondo’d the shit out of my apartment. 48 hours and 9 trash bags later, I have to admit, I feel a little joy (and a lot of exhaustion). Good thing I still have two mattresses to sleep on…
I bought Marie Kondo’s book three years ago. I never read it, and it just added to my clutter! The irony isn’t lost on me. She’s got that netflix show now, but I’m still going to keep it (The Lover’s Dictionary and Tacopedia can’t be the only two books I have in my apartment, guys).
I always say I’m going to re-gift this one day, but let’s be real.
Does Bed, Bath & Beyond take expired coupons from seven years ago? I’ll check on yahoo answers before tossing these. I’m sure someone has weighed in.
Anyone into small mexican things??? Yeah, me either LOL. Toss!
I found this massage gift certificate the girls gave me for my birthday nine years ago! I’m gonna need it after all this decluttering.
You guys, I have mattresses in every corner of my studio right now.
The memory foam mattress I bought last month is too firm, my old spring mattress is too soft, and the new hybrid mattress that got delivered today is just right!
I’m selling my memory foam mattress and giving away my old spring mattress. If anyone is interested, you should know that I live in a third floor walk-up. If you’re still interested, please hit me up on Let Go, Offer Up, or if you’re local, the Buy Nothing Redondo Beach (North) FB group. Get a mattress and earn a fitbit stair badge while you’re at it!
Me on day 4 after my ceiling sprung a massive leak:
Fortunately, it’s leaking above an area free of furniture, electronics, and my hand-tufted moroccan rug.
Unfortunately, it’s in the shape of a vagina and a literal stain on my apartment.
If anyone without a hole in their ceiling would like me to stay over tonight, you’ll be rewarded with good karma, leftover pizza from Valentino’s, and me without pants on.
Best gift ever! I finally set up this awesome projector Pammie got me for Christmas, and unlike Bird Box, it did not disappoint! Now if only I could get the last two hours of my life back…
After the most stressful day at work, I decided to chalk this day up as a loss and go straight to bed. When I got home, my new memory foam mattress was waiting outside my door! It was in a box so big, I had to bend time and space (and my back!) to get it into my apartment.
Now I’m just waiting for it to rise and get firm, so I can get on top of it and go to sleep with a smile on my face. What else is new…
I’ve been itching to build something new for my place, but I’m not sure what. My sister’s husband thinks I’m making myself too comfortable in this apartment I’ve been wanting to leave for five years, and it’ll be that much harder (for everyone else) when I eventually move out of the sticks. (You ask someone to help you move during one Chargers playoff game ten years ago, and they don’t ever let you forget it!)
Earlier this week, I reupholstered the leather cushions on my Roxy Rocker with this gorgeous Harris Tweed. According to Wikipedia, it was “handwoven by islanders at their homes in the Outer Hebrides of Scotland.” I bought it off eBay from some dude in the UK, so it must be legit.
Also, I did all this with a staple gun, and I didn’t even hurt myself! It only took that first staple barely missing my thigh for me to realize that the staples come out of the other end when you shoot it. Yikes.
I built this coffee table in an ongoing attempt to lower my Ikea to non-Ikea furniture ratio. Yes, this area rug is from Ikea, but The Great Pizza Box Fire of 2014 destroyed my non-Ikea rug, and I needed an affordable replacement! One step forward, two steps back…
This coffee table was built the same way I built my mid-century modern side table, but with a few modifications. I used pre-stain wood conditioner this time to prevent streaking and blotching. On a bigger job like this, you won’t be able to hide the ugly parts with succulents and a strategically placed Beyoncé print.
You can follow the same directions I used to build the side table. Just be sure to use these new measurements.
2 – 1″x12″-6′ common boards – 4 pieces that are cut 36″ long
(the top & bottom boards)
1 – 1″x4″-6′ common board – 2 pieces that are cut 22.5″ long
(the side boards)
Since I already had the gel stain and clear coat left over from building the side table, it only cost me $88 to make this coffee table! That’s cheaper than the Ikea rug it’s sitting on…
…or my neighbors after I almost burned down our apartment building this past weekend.
My lease is up and the only hot neighbor I had moved out this month, so I’m pretty sure the universe is telling me that it’s time to move out of the sticks, fellas.
I’m obsessed with all things Mid-Century modern, and when I saw this Co-Mod side table, I knew that I needed it in my life. But it was $345. And sold out. And $345. I felt like that needed to be mentioned twice.
Because I’ve mastered the art of assembling Ikea furniture (and tested many friendships along the way), I thought that I should try building this side table myself. I went to Home Depot, showed them a photo on my phone and was basically like, “HOW YOU DO DIS?” If you act like you don’t know what you’re doing (or you’re like me and you legitimately do not know what you’re doing), the good people at Home Depot will help you. They will tell you what paint brush you should use to apply clear coat. They will tell you what clear coat is. They will even cut your wood down to the exact size that you need at no extra charge.
1″x8″-10′ common board – 4 pieces that are cut 20″ long
(the top & bottom boards)
1″x6″-6′ common board – 2 pieces that are cut 14.5″ long
(the side boards)
DIRECTIONS:
Sand your boards. I used 150 grit sandpaper and sanded in the direction of the grain until it felt smooth. After your boards are sanded, wipe them down with a damp cloth to remove excess sawdust before staining them. This is probably something you should do outdoors in a well-ventilated area and not inside your 400 square foot studio during the only weekend it rains in Los Angeles. I still have sawdust in places I didn’t know I could get sawdust.
Stain your boards. Use gloves unless you want to have to keep explaining to everyone why your hands are brown for the next three days. You can use an old t-shirt, or if you’re a hoarder like me and can’t bear to part with your ‘I ♥ Haters’ shirt, you can get a pack of paint rags from Home Depot for $4 and use those instead. I used one to apply the stain to the wood and one to wipe off the excess. It dries pretty fast, so I was able to coat all sides without waiting. I only applied one coat, but you can apply more if you want it darker. Let the boards dry completely.
Apply clear coat. I applied it to one side of the boards using a synthetic paint brush. Give it a couple hours to dry, then turn your boards over and apply it to the other side.
Assemble your side table. Use two 20″ boards for the bottom, two 20″ boards for the top, and the remaining 14.5″ boards for the sides. Here’s a helpful diagram:
Nail the two top boards to the long edge of the side boards, and repeat on the bottom. Use two nails on each end of each board as pictured. I had someone hold the boards together for me while I hammered away.
Mount the legs. I set the legs 2″ from the edges and marked where the screws would go. I pre-drilled pilot holes and screwed the legs on with sixteen 3/4″ screws. Depending on what kind of legs you buy, you might have a different method for attaching them.
You can build your own Mid-Century modern inspired side table for roughly $78 (for just the wood and the hairpin legs, if you happen to have the other materials). You really can’t beat that price or the sense of accomplishment you’ll feel after building something with your bare, wood-stained hands.
Other things pictured:
Painted succulent pots designed by me (DIY tutorial here)
Task lamp from Target
Beyoncé print designed by me (sold on Etsy)
Bedding from Anthropologie
Bed from West Elm (discontinued!)
What you’ll need:
Clay pots in various sizes
Acrylic spray paint
Painter’s tape
Succulents
Potting Soil
Clear sealant (optional)
Directions:
Spray the clay pots with acrylic paint. I used Krylon spray paint in Mambo Pink, Flat White and Sea Glass.
Let them dry completely before taping off whatever pattern or shape your heart desires and painting them with an accent color. I used Krylon’s Gold Metallic spray paint for the triangles.
If you plan on keeping your clay pots outdoors, make sure you weatherproof them with clear sealant. Otherwise, you can go ahead and plant your succulents!
This is an easy way to add some color to your home. The hard part (for me anyway) is keeping the plants alive!
Sanding, staining and spray painting on this rainy Sunday. IDK why I thought these were things I could do inside my studio. Pretty sure I’m high right now.
I just need two more things to make this overpriced studio a home. Anyone know where I can get a good deal on a french bulldog and/or a couch in the south bay? I went furniture shopping this past weekend, and nothing seemed worth carrying up three flights of stairs or testing my friendships over.
Say goodbye to ugly white vertical blinds, and hello to wood blinds and linen curtains. And if you’re wondering if the drapes match the carpet, I’ve got hardwood floors. And so does my apartment! Ha.
I know this is just a rental, but I like to fill the void in my life with home decor.
