I make gift bags for my friends every holiday—it’s my love language (yes, BBQ is also my love language… your girl’s hella lingual). I always include stuff for their husbands because I get along swimmingly with all of them 😊 I always pack extra Nerds Gummy Clusters for Jessie’s husband because it’s his favorite candy. She knows that, so I think she ate them on purpose 😜
We always have little earthquakes in LA, but they never feel them in San Diego and vice versa. This morning, as I was in a group text with the girls chatting about one of their employees at UCSD asking to come in late today because they were still recovering from Coachella (like just say you aren’t feeling well and be on your way!), an earthquake hit SD, and it was so strong, I felt it in LA!
I hope everyone’s okay. Also, if this is an indication that the big one is coming, I should probably start wearing pants to bed.
It’s no secret that I love Moo Deng the pygmy hippo, but IDK if I’ll ever make it to Thailand to see her in person.
Also, I always have my Pic Stitch app cued up whenever the opportunity arises to do a side-by-side comparison 😆
Another pygmy hippo, Poppy, was born last December at Metro Richmond Zoo in Virginia. Domestic flights to Richmond from LAX are pretty cheap, plus I have hella Southwest points. Anyone want to go with me on a weekend trip to Richmond? 😆 If pygmy hippos aren’t your thing, CNN Travel also named Richmond #1 on their list of America’s Best Towns to Visit in 2024!
I also got an apple pie churro empanada for dessert. Or shall I say mmm-panada 😋 (I’ll see myself out).
FYI, I hate raisins in empanadas, and I tell anyone who will listen. I don’t mind them in sweet stuff, but I don’t like raisins in savory food. I also don’t like coconut in savory food (coconut shrimp, thai food, etc.), but don’t mind it in dessert. I also don’t like pineapple in savory food. Ordering a Hawaiian pizza is blasphemous and a dealbreaker. You should be writing this down 📝
The girls ask me who I’m fucking on the regular (my married friends like to live vicariously through me and think my single life in LA is way more exciting than it actually is).
You guys, the only thing keeping my bed warm at night is this Beetlejuice squishmallow Christine’s kids gave me for Christmas and this Moo Deng plushie my mom’s baby sister gave me as a thank you for treating them out in Japan.
Sidenote: The first thing I did when I found out about the tragic 7.7 earthquake in Thailand was make sure Moo Deng was ok 😅 (she’s at the Khao Kheow Open Zoo in Si Racha, Chonburi, Thailand).
On an unrelated note, I just completed the company-mandated sexual harassment training in Workday this week, and can confirm that I’m wildly inappropriate 😅
It once took me 4 hours to drive down to San Diego for Christine’s baby shower, and I arrived with less than an hour left to partake in the taco cart. After stuffing myself with 5 tacos (the 5th one was a mistake!), I was told that the taco guy was staying an extra hour, and I didn’t need to eat all those tacos in record time.
Today, it took me 3 hours to drive down to SD for Chel’s twins and Rhea’s daughter’s birthday party in PQ. I forgot people do things differently above the 8 😅 At the last kids’ party I went to in eastside, there was a birria taco bar, a tostilocos bar, and an open bar 😆
When I got to the party, Shi’s daughter was running down the street and this is how I tried to stop her:
Also, this is me when someone asks me to watch their kid:
They started jury selection today, and 80+ jurors and I didn’t get picked. We did have to sit in the gallery for hours while the 18 selected for the jury box answered questions from the judge and attorneys. We have to report again tomorrow, because they haven’t decided on the final jury yet. At least there’s good food spots in Inglewood, and the court bailiff is nice to look at 😅
File under: Shit we shouldn’t talk about in the work chat.
They’re installing Kandji on everyone’s computers at work. Supposedly it’s more secure (God forbid someone releases the new Snoop collabo early LOL), but I think they’re also monitoring us 👀
Most of our employees use Teams (which we still use for department meetings), but the web team uses Slack on a daily basis because it’s easier for us to share screens and collaborate on that platform. Can they read Slack messages that have already been deleted? Asking for a friend (it’s me, I’m the friend). I sent some other unsavory messages during my work conference, so… 😅
Many, many, many moons ago, I sent the girls an email with the subject ‘NSFW’ containing this impressive dick pic some guy sent me that I most definitely did not ask for. A couple of them opened the email at work, because they didn’t know that ‘NSFW’ stood for ‘Not Safe For Work’ LOL! Oh, they learned that day…
Yes, I still have my emails from 2009, and yes, I still have that dick pic 😆 Only because I attached it to that email, though. I didn’t have an iPhone in 2009, and the actual text exists on an LG flip phone (only an outdated phone charger can unlock those secrets).
One of my project managers emailed me that the art was approved for one of my jobs, except he must’ve been in a rush because he said that my fart was approved instead, and now I have cold brew all over my monitor 🤣
My boss, Gaye, has been in in-office meetings all day, so she left me in charge and I’m Gaye today 😆 I haven’t even taken a proper lunch, because people have been asking me questions all day, and I’m trying to get all my presentations done before I go on vacation.
At the last two Harry Potter Padres giveaway days, each house had their own item, so Pammie had to fight trade people to get all four houses 😅
It looks like there’s only one hat this time, but a flag pin for each house. I’ll just be at Hodad’s eating a single bacon cheeseburger while Pammie sorts that out.
Nori and I go to Randy’s Donuts at least once a week (after eating salads at Tender Greens—Get off us). Their donuts are always fresh, so the donuts we got were still warm. I got chocolate on my hands and Nori was like, ‘Chocolate or poop?’ There’s this scene in Baby Mama (that I reference to my sister at every opportunity I can) where Maura Tirney asks her kid if what he has on his hands is chocolate or poop, and she licks it and confirms it’s chocolate 😆 I can’t believe Nori knew that reference. Who needs a man when you have friends who get you???
Christine doordashed me a breakfast burrito this morning. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is…
Update: I had to delete my message in my work slack saying I was going to watch Babygirl tonight, because I knew it was raunchy, but had no idea it was that raunchy, and my team doesn’t know me like that 😅 The whole time I was watching Nicole Kidman loudly having sex, all I could think was, ‘Can Gloria hear this shit?!’ 😳 She’s this old black lady who has lived next door to me since I moved in 13 years ago. Save your money, guys. I have this movie illegally downloaded on my laptop if you really wanna see it. Or you can just watch free porn online 😆
Since we work remotely, and it’s our team’s first year switching to the Digital department from Advertising, most of us haven’t met in person since it was our first time attending this Digital Summit, and none of us use our real photo on Slack 😆
Most of my coworkers stayed at the hotel, because even though they live in LA, they still live over an hour away, and our days started @ 8:30am and last night, we didn’t get back to the hotel till after 10pm! The hotel is only 8 minutes away from my apartment, so I drove each day. Except the first night, I had too much to drink at dinner and took a $10 uber home 😅
Nothing says LA like a Taco Bell Cantina and an injury lawyer billboard on Hollywood Blvd.
We took a ‘City of Lights’ bus tour of LA, even though most of us live here. We went to LACMA, the La Brea Tar Pits, Urban Lights, Hollywood Stars, Sunset Blvd. and the Promenade.
It’s been raining all week. Sucks for everyone who came to town hoping to escape the cold 🥶 LA really needed the rain after those devastating fires, though. During the tour, our guide got an evacuation alert for mudslides near his house 😅
The new Ministry of Magic inside The Wizarding World of Harry Potter opens at Universal Orlando this year, but I hate Trump more than I love Disney or Universal Studios (I barely even go to the ones we have in SoCal), so you won’t find me in Florida or any other red state in the foreseeable future.
I used to use the Swarm app, where you would check in to the places you’d go. I used it partly for posterity’s sake (it would tell you the last time you were there), but mostly because I was the mayor of Crab Hut for years 😆
While I was using the app many years ago, this guy I used to mess with hit me up after he saw I checked into European Wax Center. I no longer use the Swarm app, go to Crab Hut, or fuck with fuckboys from Hollywood, but do I need to put a Brazilian on the books? At my age? 👵🏻😅
It’s getting harder and harder to get together with the girls with 4 kids between us (none of which are my own 😅), work trips (Pammie just came back from SF, Christine is going to Belgium in a couple weeks, and Pammie has to go to Scottsdale and the Philippines next month), vacations (Jessie’s going to Hawaii next week and Pammie and I are going to Japan next month), and California being literally on fire. We’ve had dinner at Fort Oak on the books for a while, but my car has had this thing dragging under it since earlier this week, and I thought I should get it checked out before driving back to LA in the rain last night. So we had pizza at Jessie’s instead, while Abe and his head lamp fixed my car LOL, and we played with Baby Isaac and loved on her pups, Koda and Milo. I left with my tummy full, my car fixed, my heart full, and absolutely covered in dog fur.
We were talking about a friend who drinks to the point that they black out, and I’m like, ‘I’ve never drank so much that I blacked out,’ to which Jessie and Christine listed all the times I got black out drunk in my 20s 😅 Does it count if it happened over 20 years ago??? Apparently it does, and I could never play ‘Never Have I Ever’ with these B’s 😆 Are you even really friends if you don’t call each other out on your shit???
Since we were celebrating Pammie’s December birthday and Christine and my January birthdays, Jessie got us pizookies from BJ’s! 🍪
Jessie: Did you know you can get it raw at BJ’s? Everyone: 😳😳😳
If it wasn’t clear, I’m Team Justin (Baldoni, Timberlake, Bieber LOL).
I first saw him when I came across this post from Jane the Virgin‘s final table read, and I was like, ‘Who is this guy?!’ I binge-watched all five seasons and have watched everything Justin Baldoni has been in or directed since.
I’ve gotten bad vibes from Blake Lively since before Gossip Girl, when she was in TheSisterhood of the Traveling Pants (20 years ago!). Plus, how trustworthy can a person be who chooses Taylor Swift as the godmother to her children??? Like, have you not one closer friend? 😆
Jessie was checking if I meant to follow Trump and Vance. I realized I was still following @potus and @vp from Biden and Kamala’s administration literally 3 days ago. You guys, I’m hardly on social media. So much so, that I tried to do the Top 9 once, and I couldn’t because I didn’t even have 9 posts that year 😅 Who knows how long it would’ve taken me to realize I was following those idiots.
Please check your social media accounts! And if you meant to follow these fools, why are we friends???
Shi couldn’t celebrate my birthday with me this year, so she doordashed me some breakfast from King’s Hawaiian 😋🤙🏼
I like to spend my birthday surrounded by wieners, HBU? (@ Puppies & Yoga)
I live at least an hour south of any of the fires burning in LA right now. You can’t see the smoke from here, but you can smell it in the air, and my car’s covered in ash. We didn’t see any smoke on the way up to West Hollywood for puppy yoga, but we did see this injury lawyer billboard 😆
We ate at Food Network’s Brooke Williamson’s beachside restaurant, Playa Provisions. Proceeds from their fish tacos went to wildfire relief, so of course that’s what I ordered. It was delicious!
Pop-prosecco? Yes, please.
I hardly ever go to the beach, even though I live literally 2 miles from the ocean on Manhattan Beach Boulevard. Donna & David happened to be in town for a wedding this weekend, and as San Diegans who moved to the east coast after high school, they like to go to the beach whenever they’re back in California.
‘Go to the beach,’ they said. ‘It’ll be fun,’ they said.
Pardon my ashy white legs LOL, I had a little accident and slipped on some rocks 😅
Fun Fact: I’ve always wanted to be Miss Argentina from Beetlejuice for Halloween.
I instacarted some non-perishables and necessities for families and pets who have been displaced due to the fires. The YMCA in Koreatown is accepting donation drop-offs.
Pammie collected money from the girls and got me an awesome Moo Deng shirt that I wore to puppy yoga, and had leftover money, so I said to just donate it to one of these major organizations accepting monetary donations for the wildfires: LAFD, American Red Cross, Direct Relief, World Central Kitchen, or the Salvation Army. They need it more than I do. Please give what you can 🥺
Jeffrey’s dad was evacuated from Altadena (north of Pasadena) early in the morning yesterday. Luckily, he’s okay, but I can’t say the same about his neighborhood.
LA is huge and the most populous county in the United States (nearly 10 million people—its population is greater than that of 40 individual U.S. states!). I’m very far from any of the fires ripping through LA right now, so I’m okay. This is like when my mom asks me to bring home a dozen potato balls from Porto’s when I visit SD. She thinks that since I live in LA, I’m close to everything in LA. It takes me an hour to get to the closest Porto’s after work on a Friday night! She’s lucky I love potato balls her.
Baby boy had his first chicken adobo last night, and I wanted to be just like him, so I made some for dinner, except I ate it with hella rice (it’s raining today and I’m carboloading to keep warm—is that how it works?).
I have no debt and no kids, and my job allows me to afford the lifestyle I’ve grown accustomed to 😅 In the end, you can only depend on yourself, and I’ve never wanted to be financially dependent on someone else, especially a man ✌🏻
Also, if these frequent earthquakes are an indication that the big one is coming, I should probably start wearing pants.
Before my department joined the Digital group and had a Teams meeting last month, I hadn’t had a meeting since 2020. I haven’t even met most of my web team because they started after the pandemic. I want to make a good impression at our in-office meeting tomorrow, and my anxiety is through the roof, so I’ll probably take an extra dose of Prozac 😅
I’m really self-conscious about my voice. My speech was altered after the stroke. I worked with a speech therapist for a few months, but it wasn’t covered by my insurance, so it was $100 out-of-pocket per weekly session! I definitely sound better almost two years later, but my speech is still delayed and some people have a hard time understanding me. After the stroke, I sounded like Marge from The Simpsons, but now my voice sounds something more akin to Squirt from Finding Nemo 😅 Other than my voice, you can’t really tell I had a stroke. I have a hard time writing by hand and opening jars LOL, but I can still walk, drive, type, photoshop, etc.
Most people don’t know I had a stroke, and I always feel compelled to explain why my voice is like this when I meet new people or haven’t seen someone since before the stroke.
I have a friend in public health who has been WFH since 2020 (with the occasional in-office executive meeting), who got a new VP who believes face-to-face is better. She’s being required to go in 3x a week now (people managers 5x a week—her old boss quit as soon as the new VP announced the requirement). She’s allowed to pick which 3 days she’s in office (which tells me being in-office is arbitrary, because her team won’t all be in-office on the same days), and people who live too far to come in (whether they moved or got hired after the pandemic) will be out of a job and given a severance package, but must continue working there for the next few months to get that severance until the requirement is in effect. She’s a high performer, but the reason she’s so good is because she WFH—she’s able to attend zoom meetings at 6am with Europe and 6pm with Japan, all while being supermom to her three young kids. Another friend of mine works at UCSD and has a hybrid schedule, so has to go in a couple days a week and had to hire a nanny to watch the baby she had last year. My friend who works in the print department at my work has to come into the office every day, and she lives in OC! So me having to go into the office once a month for this digital summit is no bigs.
Update: I was anxious over nothing. The meeting was only an hour and a half, and the VP took the web team out to lunch at North Italia afterwards. Since some complained that the presentation shown on the TV was too small, the sound wasn’t loud enough, and parking sucked, the VP suggested the next monthly meeting be held in a private event space up the street at Topgolf! Now that’s a meeting I could get behind…
It’s gonna be a shit show in LA tomorrow, and it’s gonna take a week to fix the gate in my parking garage (though when someone broke into our garage the last time, my car and my mango hi-chews went untouched LOL there were BMWs, Teslas and a Maserati in my garage—nobody was trying to fuck with my Mazda hatchback). I’m driving down to SD tonight and spending the week there anyway.
I was gonna drive down tomorrow morning, but there’s been a company re-org and now the web department reports to someone new and we have a teams meeting in the morning. You guys, I haven’t had a meeting since 2020 😅 I don’t even know what half my team looks like because they started after the pandemic. Also, I haven’t spoken to any of these people (off Slack or email) since the stroke. I’m not even sure most of them know I even had a stroke! I was sure my boss told them why I was out for 6 months, but I was chatting on Slack with my project manager, and I made this offhanded joke about having a stroke, and she had no idea. I’m like, ‘What did my boss even tell these people about my 6-month absence???’ The higher ups knew and didn’t even send me flowers while I was in the hospital, so IDK why I expected my coworkers to know. It happened right before the superbowl, and my friends saw the big Snoop commercial and were like, ‘They can afford Snoop for the superbowl, but they can’t afford to send their employee of over 10 years flowers in the hospital?!’ Yes, I’m still bitter, and yes, I dried my tears with the raise and bonus they gave me while I was on medical leave.
Anyway, here’s some actual footage of me driving in LA traffic:
My phone was blowing up with the news of One Direction’s Liam Payne’s untimely death today.
This was like when Prince died and everyone was texting me about it (except Shi, who was sending me corgi videos LOL).
So we play, play, play all the same old games
And we wait, wait, wait for the end to change
And we take, take, take it for granted that we’ll be the same
But we’re making all the same mistakes
IDK if it’s because I’m on my period or because I’m a teenage girl trapped in a 42-year-old’s body, but Jesus, I got emotional listening to this 1D song 😭
Nori and I were sitting outside Starbucks, and I was looking at the bank next door, and I was like, ‘How come nobody’s in there? Are they closed?’ This went on for a few minutes until I saw this big ass sign on the door that they were closed today for Columbus Day.
me: I thought Columbus Day was canceled? Nori: It’s been replaced by another day. In… Indi… Indonesian… me: Indigenous??? Nori: This better not make your blog!
I have trouble pronouncing some words after the stroke (vegetable and adhesive, among others LOL), but I can say ‘indigenous’ 🤣🤣🤣
I have made the decision not to answer your calls ‘Cause I put everything out there and I got nothing at all
Another time, we were talking about both of us having seen Sam Smith live before, and we realized we went to the same show in LA before we knew each other. We were trying to remember who opened for him, and she was like, ‘That guy who sings that one song… Idaho?’ and then I remembered, ‘BUDAPEST! George Ezra.’
IDK how I got ‘Budapest’ from ‘Idaho’ but I got there 😅
Anyway, according to this article, Wal-Mart and Chick-Fil-A are both open today LOL.
At Chel’s sister’s baby shower today, Shi and I played a game where I had to bottle feed her like a baby. She couldn’t stop laughing, so she kept choking on the bottle 😆
I usually kill at baby shower games. I once won a dirty diaper game by identifying 10 out of 10 melted candy bars (some without even having to smell them). Just let me have my weird ass flex 😜
I completed another StepBet challenge, but I still have 87 more miles to do by the end of October in this Nike Run Club challenge 😅 We don’t win any money, but bragging rights are enough motivation for me 😆
If you’ve ever messaged me anything in this lifetime, I don’t ever delete shit (my new phone holds 1TB, and my cloud has been full for two years). Anything you’ve said can and will be used against you if you ever betray me. Consider this your miranda warning 😆
Addendum: If your message incriminates me too, I’ll never use it against you 😅
When your boss’ name is ‘Gaye’ and you have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old boy 😅 I’m the most senior web designer after my director, so she always puts me in charge when she’s out.
Also, is this offensive to the LGBTQIA2S+ community? 😅 I was going to remind the team that I’m Gaye on Monday, but now I’m rethinking my approach…
I get my lashes done once a month by this lady who lives in Arizona. She lives part time in Tucson to help out with her grandkids, but she still has a lot of clients in SD, and she comes to my sister’s or Christine’s house so it’s convenient for us—Yes, Christine and I have the same Brazilian waxer and lash artist. I’ve even gone to her eyebrow lady when I needed a serious threading in a pinch. If you don’t share the same estheticians, are you even friends? 😜
We were trying to schedule our October appointment at our last session, and I wanted my lashes to be refreshed for my Halloween costume, so I was like, ‘Are you available the week of Halloween? Will you be with your grandkids?’ and she was like, ‘Oh, I don’t celebrate Halloween. I’m Christian.’ 😳
I also finally saw my neighbor today. Everyone else around me is still there from when I lived in the building before the stroke, but my next door neighbor moved in while I was gone. I smiled at her and said hello because I was coming when she was going, but she just grimly smiled at me and kept walking. She probably saw my Halloween decorations and was thinking, ‘Oh, so you’re the witch who lives next door.’ She’s lucky she’s quiet, or else I’d put a curse on her 😆
After we went to the Rams game, we took the bus out of traffic because it was impossible to get a rideshare at the stadium. The last stop was in Playa del Rey, down the street from Chef Brooke Williamson‘s resto, Playa Provisions. We were gonna grab dinner there before heading home, but they had a private event that night and weren’t accepting walk-ins, just reservations! I forgot you either have to make a res or wait in a ridiculously long line to eat at a good resto in LA 😅
Anyway, I would never choose to have Indian for dinner, but I’m also easygoing and down to try anything (except baby animals and Highland cows LOL). I avoided all the lamb dishes, of course, but the malai rigatoni was def something to write home about (@ Pijja Palace)
It was like an Indian take on perfectly al dente vodka pasta. Maybe I like Indian fusion, because I really enjoyed the Tandoori Chicken Poutine at Maneet Chauhan’s restaurant in Nashville, too.
This place was also oddly a sports bar, so I got to catch the Padres playoff game during dinner. They won again and swept the Braves to win the wild card series!
People were asking me if I was gonna go to a playoff game at Dodger Stadium, but the last time I went to a Padres/Dodgers game at that stadium (last week LOL), Padres lost big time, so I don’t wanna jinx them 😅
The series is best-of-five in a 2-2-1 format, so game 3 will be in SD. I’ll be in SD next week, but game 3 falls on my dad’s birthday, so I’m hoping the Dodgers don’t sweep, and there’s a game 4 I can possibly go to in SD.
Also, I might have to go to a game if someone’s able to find me this cute ass Padres jacket Alex Morgan (SD Wave soccer player) wore to a game last month 🔥
Because I’m still in love with you
On this harvest moon
After dinner, we went to Larchmont Village for Jeni’s ice cream and cookies from Levain Bakery, and this guy was playing ‘Harvest Moon’ on the sax on the street. It’s a Neil Young song, but I only know it because Lord Huron did a cover 😆
On the way home, we saw the coolest house decorated for Halloween in Highland Park 🖤
I found this Airbnb in Canada that has Highland cows on the property.
Nori’s been to Scotland, but she didn’t get to see any Highland cows (they’re from the Scottish Highlands) while she was there. I found some places in North America you can see these cute hairy cows, and then I went down the google rabbit hole wondering if they slaughter them here.
I love BBQ (smoked beef ribs are my favorite), and now I feel like I have to ask what kind of cow I’m eating at restaurants like in Portlandia 😅
As a rule, I don’t eat baby animals (lamb, veal or suckling anything)—just adult animals who have lived a full life LOL. And now I have to add Highland cows (at any age) to that list 😆
The news of Dave Grohl came out that he had a baby outside his marriage. It’s unfortunate for his wife and kids, but it doesn’t make me like the Foo Fighters’ music any less. I think The Strokes frontman, Julian Casablancas, is a total asshole (I’ve been to a couple of their shows where he proved it by walking off the stage early), but I still love The Strokes’ music and his side project band, The Voidz.
I’m not completely forgiving, though. I don’t listen to R. Kelly or Diddy’s music anymore 😅
Said I know that it’s somebody’s birthday tonight somewhere
And I know somebody’s gonna celebrate tonight somewhere
My birthdays haven’t been the same since R. Kelly was convicted of child sexual abuse in 2022 😅
me: When did we go to that Foo Fighters show in Phoenix? Last year? Pammie: No, two years ago. We didn’t go to Innings Fest last year. me: Why didn’t we go last year? Pammie: Because you had a stroke! me: Oh, yeah 😅
I was woken up today by an earthquake in Malibu. I just went back to sleep, partly because it was 4:22 in the morning, but mostly because the earthquake was only 3.6 (when it comes to earthquakes and boys, I only get up for a 6 or above 😆).
I had to use the stove last night, so I moved my new air fryer toaster oven from on top of the stove to on top of the fridge and pushed the glass canisters of sugar and flour to the edge. ‘They’ll be fine up here as long as there isn’t an earthquake,’ I thought.
This reminds me of the time I moved out of my apartment in La Mesa. Shi and I set my bed frame on its side to see if I could get it out of my bedroom without having to break it down. After finding out it could fit through the door in one piece, we left it propped up against the wall.
This is the conversation that followed:
me: Aren’t you gonna help me put the bed frame back down? Shi: Just leave it. It’ll be easier to move tomorrow. me: What if it falls on me while I’m sleeping? Shi: It’s NOT going to fall on you! me: But what if there’s an earthquake? Shi: There’s not going to be a damn earthquake, crazy!
Can you guess what woke me up the next morning? I survived the earthquake, obvi… no thanks to you, Shirley May!
There’s this sharp ass agave plant under the doorbell in front of my sister’s house. When I was installing the Ring, I dropped one of the screws and couldn’t get it because it fell into the plant, so I had to order spare parts. Before the spares arrived, my dad tried to get the screw in the plant even though I warned him the plant was really sharp and it was impossible. He ended up poking himself on one of the sharp ass plant spikes and asking for Neosporin. It’s a good thing my sister’s my father’s daughter, because there was Neosporin and sanitizer in her bathroom. I can guarantee you there’s no Neosporin in my apartment in LA 😅
I go to baseball games for the food and post-game fireworks. Also, on my walk this afternoon, this guy who always says hi to me asked me if they won. I was wearing my Padres hat, but mostly to protect my face from the sun 😅 Just like I only wear my Dodgers hat when I have bedhead, and I never wear my Padres hat in LA and vice versa. Good thing I looked up their stats for this chat string, because I was able to tell the guy that they have a night game today, so they haven’t played yet, but they won their last three games 😆
I had a shitty day at work today, so I took a walk to Starbucks, got my steps in, and got my new favorite drink: an Iced Mocha Latte with no whip and 2 pumps of Cinnamon Dolce Syrup (it tastes just like a Mexican mocha!). I feel so much better, but I might have a menty b later, IDK.
Whenever I’m having a shitty day at work, I just remind myself that at least I’m doing better than the people my sister had to lay off today because of a company re-org, and remind myself how much I’m getting paid to put up with this shit 😆
Even though I used to think he was an asshole ever since he jumped on the cutting board during an Iron Chef battle against Chef Morimoto in 2000 (I was more offended when he yelled, ‘Raise the roof, yo!’ tbh) and he’s since been thrice-divorced, but I kinda like assholes 🤪
Update: I got the stamp of approval from Pammie, Dennis, and my sister’s brother-in-law, Paul, who dropped by for dinner. They finished the rice! I’m finally redeemed from when Pammie and her husband said my adobo was too salty two years ago. Their hurtful comments still keep me up at night 😅
A good way to insult me is to say I look darker LOL, and I have never once been mistaken for a local in Hawaii. I’m too fair-skinned and much too loud 😅 (my Cali vernacular screams tourist vibes).
Also, I should clarify that I only got drunk in Christine’s pool because she and her husband were there watching the kids. I don’t drink when I’m watching children (mostly because people never leave their kids with me).
Ever since I repotted our coin plant, most of the leaves have fallen out and it has been slowly dying. My sister texted me this photo of this luscious coin plant at her hotel in Hawaii, and it’s a full moon tonight, so I’m charging my crystals on the rooftop and put the coin plant next to it so it can receive its energy LOL.
Today I walked to Mcdonald’s to get my steps in and say hi to all my dog friends, made cookies for my grandma’s party tomorrow, drove by myself (for the first time since the stroke and didn’t kill anybody!) to Christine’s club pool, and went swimming with her, Francis and the kids. They brought beer and seltzers, and I was way too drunk to drive home, so Christine drove my car home while Francis followed, all the while Dylan was screaming in the backseat, ‘Thank you for the cookies, Auntie Mayan!!!’
You have a secret lover for five years and no one ever lets you forget it 😅
My dog friends:
My sister and her husband are vacationing in Hawaii for the week. Partly because I didn’t want to schlep all my work shit to my parents’ house (I have to bring my gigantic work-issued desktop, because IT won’t let us access the server from our personal laptops anymore), but mostly because I’m a grown ass woman who doesn’t need supervision, I’m staying at my sister’s house by myself.
No secret lovers here! But I will be walking around in my chonies 😜
We watched It Ends With Us at the theater, and I didn’t read the book or watch the trailer beforehand, but Justin Baldoni directed and starred in it, and I’ll watch anything he’s in. If you don’t know who Justin Baldoni is, he was Raf in Jane the Virgin and the love of my life.
I’m just gonna leave this here 😍
This movie def made me cry, but Christine was crying throughout the entire movie, even the parts that weren’t sad LOL. She was already crying before the movie started when they showed the trailer for We Live In Time. To be fair, I also cried during that trailer.
Christine loves Justin Baldoni, too, so I asked if she’s seen Five Feet Apart, another movie Justin directed but did not star in, and I sobbed through in 2019. She found it streaming on Prime, watched it alone at home, and has been crying all day 😅
The last time I saw the Foo Fighters was a couple years ago at Innings Fest just a month before their drummer died. Jessie asked me if I wanted her extra tickets, but I’ve been in a mood. If I would’ve known she had a suite, I would’ve snapped out of my mood real quick 😜
Whenever I see someone my age with facial piercings, I’m like, ‘Is that what I look like?’ 😳
When I was younger, I thought I’d love things forever (as evident by the glow-in-the-dark stars still on the ceiling of my old bedroom at my parents’ house that I stuck up there with permanent adhesive). I used to have my tongue pierced, but only took my tongue ring out after I had my lip pierced in my early 20s. I was in the Mcdonald’s drive-thru during covid, and I briefly pulled down my mask, and the guy taking my order made eyes at me and was all, ‘I really like your lip ring.’ I pinned him with a look and was like, ‘This piercing is older than you, kid.’ 👵🏻 In unrelated news, I’m still single. I seem to only get hit on by seedy tow truck drivers and kids who work at Mcdonald’s and were born after I graduated high school 😅
I would take the lip ring out, but I don’t think the hole will close. I got my ears pierced when I was a baby, and I hardly ever wear earrings, yet the holes are still there. I’d like to have a plastic surgeon remove the scar tissue and sew the lip ring hole up. It shouldn’t be too hard to find a good plastic surgeon in LA 😜
Chel sent me this post earlier this morning and then I sent her the same post when I saw it closer to the afternoon. I never got a notification that she sent me the same post because I have my ‘do not disturb’ on at such an unholy hour 😅
Jessie’s looking for a nanny and they must be flat-chested, unattractive, located in San Diego, and good with dogs (in that order) 😆
Also, they filmed You down the street from my apartment in LA. I stopped watching after the second season because it was getting too far-fetched and crazy. I’d rather watch true crime 😆
I was at the post office earlier this week mailing 4th of July goodie packages to a couple of my friends who don’t live in SD, and I mused to myself, ‘What’s the next holiday?’ Pammie’s like, ‘Labor Day. Remember we have that Harry Potter Padres Theme Game that night?’ ‘I meant the next holiday I make gift bags for. Ooh, Halloween!’
Talking to Pammie about current events is like trying to find meaning in a Pauly Shore movie 😅
My sister has been in Solana Beach for work all week, so my parents are taking me to my doctor’s appointment in LA tomorrow. I got my labs back, and it was negative for lymphoma and leukemia, but my white blood cell count was still elevated and they saw some ‘abnormalities’ whatever that means. Hopefully the hematologist will have more insight for me tomorrow. At least it’s not blood cancer! 😅
I’m back at work doing web stuff after weeks of being on vacation, months of being on catalogs, and recovering after a bout with covid. I also have a new profile pic on Slack 😜
Whenever I see a short girl with a tall guy, I’m like, ‘Stay in your lane, girl. He can’t even see you.’ 😅 I’m not super tall (5’7″), but I’m taller than most girls I know. Shi has been trying to get me to expand my dating pool and go back to Asians, but I haven’t been with an Asian guy in 20 years, plus they’re usually on the shorter side. I don’t necessarily love wearing heels, but I like having the option 😜
Welp, I finally got covid. Half our tour bus got sick towards the end of our trip. I took a test as soon as I got home last night, went to bed, and woke up 20 hours later 😅
Spain recap soon. Perhaps when this virus has left my body ✌🏼
Update: Supplemental paid sick leave for covid ended in California in 2022, so I guess I’ll be reporting those sick days in kronos 😅
No BBQ? No alcohol? No dogs? And where do I exit? 😅
I’ve only seen the bestie once since I had the stroke and have been in SD. She moved to Murrieta a few years ago, and it’s about as equally far from my place in LA as it is to SD. She invited me to her city’s birthday bash next month. Not sure what the celebration entails, since there won’t be any BBQ, alcohol or dogs LOL, but there will be fireworks at least. Plus, I would love to see Alicia and her fam, so hopefully I’ll be driving by this time, so I can make it!
My parents were so traumatized after teaching my sister to drive when she was 16, so when it was my turn to learn the next year, they hired a driving instructor 😅 Jessie offered to help me practice driving, though we’ll use my car instead of her new Lexus SUV, and she will probably leave her newborn baby at home (good call LOL). She also said Pammie can ride in the back, but the second she says something, she’s outta there! 🤣
After Chel sent me this photo of this stray cat she took in, I sent her a gabillion IG reels of cute cats. She was like, ‘Ok whyyy do you have so many cat videos at your disposal? 🤣’ I follow a lot of animals on instagram, and bookmark a lot of cat videos, and now I can finally share them with someone! Yes, I’ve already invited her to do kitten yoga.
My favorite cat on instagram is named Francis. He’s 13, but he still looks like a kitten because he has dwarfism 🥹 You’re welcome 😽
Through some excessive light googling, I found the baby registry of a guy who ghosted me once 😳 It’s a blessing and a curse, the shit you can find out on the internet…
You guys, every day I play Wordle, and every day I start with the same word – ‘pious’. Nori always starts with a different word, but I’m like, ‘It’s gonna be ‘pious’ one of these days.’ And guess who got it on the first try today??? Should my lucky ass walk to the liquor store and buy a lottery ticket?
I have 3 days and just under 7 miles left to complete this Nike Run Club 60-mile challenge Shi put us on a couple weeks ago. Home stretch! Also, never in my life has someone called me ‘pure of heart’ 🤣
I weighed myself last Monday and had only lost a pound after a week of exercising more and eating less. It was discouraging to say the least, but I kept at it. The pounds used to melt off when I’d diet and exercise before, but I have to remind myself that I was heavier back then, and I’m in my forties now 👵🏻
I had to do some bloodwork yesterday for my upcoming doctor’s appointment, so I weighed myself and I’ve lost a few more pounds. My blood glucose is down, my good cholesterol is up, my bad cholesterol is down, my other numbers are mostly good and within normal range. Good health is measured a little differently these days. Hopefully my doc has good things to say about my progress. Words of affirmation is my love language LOL.
Jessie’s husband is probably the closest I’ll come to having an actual husband (we have the same birthday, we both hate yellow mustard, and we joke that we’re gonna marry each other after Jessie’s untimely death LOL). He always gets stuff with my name in it, and even got me a 4-pack of sours from his favorite brewery. If he wasn’t already married to one of my dearest friends 😜
Chel’s friend (who’s our age!) passed away from a heart attack last week. Everyday, my family tells me I’m lucky to be alive still after having a stroke at 40, and I’m always like, “Am I, though?” 😅 Every time I hear a story like this though, I feel lucky…
Shi sent us a challenge to do 60 miles by end of April on the Nike Run Club App. I hate exercising, but I’m competitive as fuck. Let’s do this!
Donna’s son has been staying at my sister’s to train at the Olympic Training Center nearby, and he had a meet in LA today, so we went up to watch him compete, have dinner with his friend who lives near me in Manhattan Beach, and stopped by my apartment to pick up my passport before my trip next month. It was raining most of the day, and we had just finished telling him about all the tickets I’ve racked up in LA, when this big ass truck hydroplaned and spun out behind us in the rain. Luckily, he didn’t hit anyone or us. We think Elijah might be our good luck charm 🤗 He placed 2nd at the meet today, just being edged out by this kid from UCSD who PR’d.
I can only eat pad thai now when it’s topped with a whole ass lobster tail (@ Nawa Thai Manhattan Beach)
My passport was exactly where I thought it was (even though I haven’t used it since 2020), and I picked up my mail and got a random ass check for $1600 for some Wells Fargo lawsuit settlement. I haven’t banked with Wells Fargo since I had a private loan there for art school over a decade ago, so the check was very unexpected.
I went to the disability office earlier this week and there were like literally 100 people in the waiting room and spilling out into the hallways. I was like, “I’m not waiting in this fucking line,” and told the dude at the desk that we just needed a form to report the disability income I received last year, and he was like, “Everyday, people ask me for a 1099G form to report their disability income, and I’mma tell you the same thing I told them. It’s FREE money. You don’t have to report it. The money comes from social security taxes you’ve already paid.” So I don’t have to report the disability checks I received and saved last year, and now I could buy all the banana pudding ice cream I want. Or a Tesla. I haven’t decided yet.
On the drive home from LA, I found out Donna’s kid likes the Deftones just like his auntie, and we listened to them on the whole car ride home 🖤
I usually do my taxes as soon as I get my W2 in January. I only have one job, I don’t own a house, I’m not married, and I have no kids, so it’s fairly easy and I always get a refund. I just upload my W2 to hrblock.com, answer a few questions, and my refund usually gets direct deposited a few weeks later.
Since I had the stroke last year and received tax-free disability checks during my medical leave for six months, I waited till the eleventh hour to do my taxes, because I assumed I’d have to pay taxes on that income. It took months for my disability to get approved, so I used up all my sick time and vacation (which I was max’d out on) to get paid in the meantime. When my disability finally got approved, it was retro to when I applied in January, so I got a ton of money and it was all tax-free. I didn’t need the money, because I wasn’t spending $5,000 on doordash every month anymore LOL, so I opened a high-yield savings account and just let the money sit in there and gain interest ever since.
I never got a form with the disability income, and HR thinks I should’ve received a separate W2 for that income. I had my friend who goes into the office near my apartment check my mail, and I didn’t receive anything from the company they use. I also emailed my contact at the company, and she just forwarded my email to someone who could help.
I’m too young to know anyone else who has had a stroke or gotten short-term disability LOL, so if you know someone who has, please send them my way to give me some insight 🙏🏼
If I don’t have to pay taxes on those disability checks, I’m either gonna buy a Tesla with that money, or doordash some banana pudding ice cream from Coldstone, I haven’t decided yet…
Sidenote: You don’t want to mess with my boss ass bitch sister. I can hear her in her work meetings sometimes making her employees cry 😅
Our catalog comps were pushed a few days, so I took a nap this afternoon, and had the weirdest dream. A groomer was calling me to confirm the address to drop my dogs off at. He says my ex-boyfriend’s old address, so I call my ex like WTF? And he tells me we’re married with two dogs.
I woke up, because my sister texted me that she saw Lucille (my favorite dog) on her balcony outside.
Where are you now?
Do you still think of me?
Or does your heart belong to someone else’s?
Love, oh, my love
I wonder sometimes, were you just a dream?
I sit in the dark
Wondering if our paths will ever cross again
I once danced to Janet Jackson’s Miss You Much off her Rhythm Nation album for my Modern Jazz class in 1989. I’m sure there’s a VHS tape of my performance floating around somewhere 😅
Not to be dramatic or anything, but I would die for this handsome boy 😍
I rarely lose my shit over babies or children in general (they just don’t give me the same feels that puppies or food do LOL), but I love this kid so much 😭 I had a full head of hair when I was born, too, so that’s why Pammie said he looks like me 😍
Christine and Pammie met baby Isaac today, and I stayed behind because I’m still sick. I instacarted Jessie her favorite strawberry rhubarb pie from Julian Pie Company and some Tillamook vanilla ice cream, and Pammie gave them my Easter goodie bags and our pasalubong from Nashville (a onesie from the farmers market that said, ‘y’all’, strawberry rhubarb jam from Lucky Ladd Farms, and merch from Justin Timberlake’s resto, The 12/30 Club) so I was there in spirit.
Jessie and I have always joked that I’d marry her husband after her untimely death and it’s good to know we can still joke about it now that they’re with child 😅
We’re all supposed to meet baby Isaac this weekend, but I don’t wanna see Abe with another woman’s baby I’m still sick.
Trying to explain to Shi what ‘split’ sauce is reminded me of this scene from Schitt’s Creek 🤣 If we had a cooking show, I’m sure it’d be exactly like this!
My sister is the most technologically challenged person I know (right behind my dad), and one time we were up at my apartment in LA for a doctor’s appointment, and my wifi wasn’t working, and she had like a million zoom meetings to attend that day. I’m like, “Just use your phone as a hotspot.” “What’s a hotspot?” she says. I showed her how to use her phone as a hotspot, and I’m like, “Welcome to the 21st century!” LOL
I have a wireless laser color printer in my room at my sister’s, and I’m at my parents’ house right now, so I asked her to print some pictures of my parents’ bathroom for their remodel. I was surprised she was able to figure it out on her own.
Another time, Shi was helping me with this wedding invitation order and she was using a corner punch to round all the corners. She was like, “All done!” I see a sharp, unrounded corner, and I’m like, “What’s this little guy?” We were at the cafe inside Borders, and we couldn’t stop laughing, we were so loud.
Nori still goes into the office, so she keeps me updated on the food spots we’d go to for lunch. I miss going to the mall just to get Cinnabon 😅 Or walking by some skanky outfit at Forever 21 and asking Nori if she’d wear it for $3 🤣
I won’t be happy ’till I’m with you
Home for me is where you are
I sent Shi this post on IG that made me think of her, and we were chatting about Us the Duo breaking up. I mean, I’m unwell, but def not as sad as I was when Michael Jackson or Prince died LOL.
Is anyone else set up like a Buffalo Wild Wings??? 🤣
I went to SDSU for a year before I went to art school, so I have a little bit of Aztec pride. Just a little bit, though. Most of my memories of going to state weren’t good ones LOL. SDSU is a party school, and I wasn’t about that Greek life. I could never find parking, so I bought a trolley pass because I worked at AAA at the time, and there was a trolley stop in their parking lot. I remember I parked one morning and was getting out of my car as the trolley was pulling up, so I missed it. I had to wait fifteen minutes for the next trolley. As I was waiting, I realized I forgot something in my car, and as I was walking back from my car, I missed another trolley and had to wait fifteen more minutes. I finally got to school, but the trolley dumps you in front of state, and the art department was all the way across campus in the back of the school. When I finally got to class, there was a note taped to the door that class was canceled. Son of a! 😅
Donna was telling us how she had the famous turtle soup at Commander’s Palace in New Orleans, and she told her friend (who loves turtles), and her husband was like, “Why would you tell her that?” and she was like, “Because the name of the dish is cute. Turtle soup.” And he was like, “You just told your friend who loves turtles that you just ate turtles.” She was like, “No, I didn’t. The description didn’t mention turtles. It said, ‘The authentic Louisiana favorite with veal fond, egg and crushed lemon. Finished tableside with a splash of aged sherry.’ I thought I was eating veal.” #1 I would never eat veal (I don’t eat baby animals LOL) and #2 it says ‘turtle’ in the name! She was like, “A lot of dishes have animals in the name, and doesn’t contain those animals.” I was like, “Name one dish.” And she couldn’t think of any 😂
Whenever my work signs a new athlete, I never know who they are. I only know who Tony Romo is because he used to date Jessica Simpson LOL. And who the Cleveland Browns coach is because he’s fine as hell 🔥 It’s a good thing I don’t play fantasy football, because I’d pick my team based on how cute the players are. Jimmy Garoppalo would be my QB, so I’d def be dead last 😅
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