» chat
The Matrix.
Thursday, September 28, 2023
i can't with you gif

Apparently, Dumbledore died ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Is this like the time we were watching the fourth Matrix, and Pammie was like, “Neo looks so old,” and I was like, “Wait… who’s Neo?” 🤣 In my defense, I’ve only seen the first Matrix movie when it came out it 1999. I still can’t tell you what the matrix is!

This is why people don’t like watching shit with me 😅

piecomic hbo

Wednesday, September 27, 2023


Are you even really friends if you don’t coordinate your brazilians???

P.S. I discovered Linda 13 years ago! She has since left Viva Brazil and does house calls now if you ever need your vag waxed in SD 😅

Monday, September 25, 2023

When someone asks me what my limit is for an *NSYNC concert (it’s $1,000 for Beyoncé):

mean girls - the limit does not exist gif


Saturday, September 23, 2023


justin homage pizza

Justin Gaspar from Hommage Bakehouse (who won Hulu’s Baker’s Dozen) made pizzas during the party and they were so good. He liked my Boo Berry Krispie Treats and his wife was the first person ever to compliment me on my Original Berf shirt, too, so they’re good people 😆

gender reveal

We came for the pizza, but stayed for the gender reveal!


It has been a hard IVF journey for my dear friend after battling breast cancer, and Jessie surprised all of us by telling us that the surrogacy’s pregnancy took and baby boy Cuevas is coming March 2024!

We are simply overjoyed 🥹

Tuesday, September 19, 2023

dtf chat handicap

The DMV approved my application for a Disabled Person (DP LOLOL) placard if you want to hang out and get primo parking 😂 You guys, this placard even lets you park on an on-street metered parking space at no charge or in an area that requires a resident permit! Should I update my Tinder bio to include this??? JK, the placard is more of a third date reveal 🤣 I could also get you a discount at the Skechers Food Spot LOL. IDK why I’m single when I come with all these perks ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I once got 3 parking tickets in one weekend, so this placard is gold 😅 In my defense, parking in LA is a nightmare.

Saturday, September 16, 2023


I was totally this kid. I could never find my bus tickets, even though I took the bus to school every morning and night up until high school LOL. They were just loose in my backpack. I still feel panic and anxiety as an adult whenever I get to the drive through window and I’m not ready with my credit card even though I’ve been sitting in line for twenty minutes 😅


Accurate ✌🏼

Saturday, September 9, 2023

Shi says it’s still too soon for stroke jokes 😅 *laughs awkwardly*

chat stroke

P.S. When I say I can eat anywhere, I mean it. My friend and I once went to lunch with this vegan girl who insisted we choose the restaurant (“I can find vegan food anywhere,” she said), and then she insisted we order and eat in front of her even though the restaurant was “garbage” and she wasn’t gonna order anything. Most awkward lunch ever! I kept stealing glances my friend as I nibbled on my salad, and she was just going to town on her food like, “She said to eat in front of her, so I’m eating!” 🤣

Cult of Personality.
Wednesday, September 6, 2023

Young the Giant is always a good idea (@ CalCoast Credit Union Open Air Theatre)

One of Francis’ friends was working security, and he was like, “Yooo, you like Young the Giant?!” like it was a bad thing 🤣 Is this like when I liked Hoobastank?! 😅

Even though my calves burn with the fury of a thousand suns (our seats were at the very bottom and it’s a looong way to the top where the drinks are), YTG is always worth it.

Here’s Francis and I texting each other during the show because our seats were right in front of the speakers and we couldn’t hear each other LOL:


Tuesday, September 5, 2023


Young the Giant tonight! Christine sent us this video of a guy crying at the Beyoncé concert, and we’ve been laughing for a million years.

Saturday, September 2, 2023
wild gif
good time gif

The last time Jessie and I went to a game together, we ran into my brother-in-law at Las Hadas afterward and he told Pammie, “Tell your sister she was sloppy.”

Jessie and I got roofied once at The Waterfront (Pammie’s like, “Please try not to get roofied tonight,” and Jessie was like, “We didn’t try the first time!” LOL) and she and Christine had to pick my ass up from under a bridge downtown one morning another time after my walk of shame. My twenties were wild 😅

I got into the uber and told Jessie I already pre-gamed with a gummy because it takes a long time for me to digest, and she was like, “Do we need to call Christine already???” but our standby was already tipsy because she and Allyn took the kids to D&B’s and had their own Asian Night 🤣

Friday, September 1, 2023


Do boys not like morbid girls???

Thursday, August 31, 2023


IDK if I was a bad driver before the strokes, but I definitely was bad at Wordle 🤣

Contrary to popular belief, driving in LA made me a more aggressive, better driver. Even though I’m Asian and a woman 🤣

Tuesday, August 29, 2023
i've grown accustomed to a certain lifestyle modern family gif

Bey in LA this weekend, anyone???

JK, I think we settled on the Padres game this Saturday ⚾ Or we can pretend we’re 21 again at El Dorado one last time. We used to go there for drinks, and I’d wake up the next morning with a half eaten burrito next to my face LOL. I used to be fun 😅

I sent this video to Jessie because she has chickens, and I’ve been laughing for 100 years 🤣

Virgo Season.
Friday, August 25, 2023

chat bey

I wasn’t planning on seeing Beyoncé this weekend. I only brought my Original Berf and Michael Myers shirts 😂 (I obviously wasn’t planning on meeting the love of my life, either). Do I need to go shopping???

Wednesday, August 23, 2023


What, your friends don’t send you pics of their husbands? 🤣

Also, you can always count on Christine for the two finger zoom in LOL.

The Worst.
Wednesday, August 9, 2023

dtf chat

My friends are the best 🙃 Most of my responses have been redacted to keep up the illusion that I’m a nice person 😅

Everybody’s like“He’s no item”“Please don’t like ’em”“He don’t wife ’em”“He one nights ’em”

Sunday, August 6, 2023
choadortuan chat
true story gif

Cedrik Lorenzen videos and cackles at dinner with the girls last night ♥️

Thursday, August 3, 2023

francis incubus chat

I gotta stop hanging out with my friends’ husbands LOL.

Tuesday, July 25, 2023

slack a/c chat

Can someone go to my apartment and make sure there’s no mold growing in my portable A/C unit? 😅

Airport Fries.
Thursday, July 6, 2023

the counter

me: Are the fries at The Counter skinny or big?
Dennis: They’re skinny like you.
me: Skinny fries are my favorite! Okay I’m not gonna go to dinner with you guys when we get to Vegas. It’ll be after 9pm and I’ll be sleeping LOL. I’m just gonna grab something at the airport.
Dennis: I lied before. The Counter’s fries are big. Now you have to eat dinner with us!
me: Joke’s on you. I like ALL fries!

I love a good french fry, and Eater came out with The Top 10 French Fries in LA. I’ve been to 3/10 of those places (Majordomo, République, and Father’s Office). Anyone want to eat some french fries with me???

Tuesday, June 27, 2023
voldemort chat
fight gif

#TBT to that time I almost got into a fight at a Padres game (last weekend).

We had good seats in Section 110, but spent most of the time in the lawn area, partly because Shi was there with the kids, but mostly because it was near Hodad’s and the theme giveaway line.

Our tickets were $100+ each and parking was $55! Is this how much it costs to go to a game now??? I sound like my dad LOL. He was just saying he remembers when basketball playoff floor seats were only $500. When??? 40 years ago when the Clippers were a San Diego team? 🤣

They’re building the Clippers a new stadium in Inglewood, down the street from where I paid $60 for parking for Dua Lipa last year (then I paid an extra $10 for a locker because my purse was too big!). It’s less than 20 minutes away from my apartment, but I’m not gambling with rideshare prices.

Sometimes I have to remind myself, “You’re in your forties now. You need to calm the fuck down.” 😅 I think I got my fire from my mom’s side. When I was a little kid, my mom and her sisters got into a fight with these girls at Potomac Park because they wouldn’t let my grandma use the water fountain. I just remember them ripping the braids out of the girls’ heads and taking their watches LOL. They were in their twenties back then, but they’re just as fiesty in their sixties now. Don’t mess with the Cuevas girls!

Booty Shorts and Burritos.
Thursday, June 15, 2023


We paid our respects at Jocelyn’s mom’s viewing tonight. No one wore booty shorts (@ Glen Abbey)

Hopefully the señorita bread we brought made up for us not voting for her for homecoming queen 20-something years ago. It felt like high school all over again (I’m still hanging out with the same girls and I had a carne asada burrito for dinner LOL).

Goodest Boi.
Wednesday, June 14, 2023


My parents are dog sitting the goodest boi ever for the next month and they are so excited. The dog, not so much LOL.

Toodles, Noodles.
Tuesday, June 13, 2023

chat veggie spirals

I rarely eat rice or pasta now, but I still allow myself the occasional cinnamon roll or cookie. I’m not a psychopath 😅

Wednesday, June 7, 2023


I need this gummy bear-scented deodorant in my life.

P.S. If you knew me when I was, I’m sorry LOL.

Lights Out.
Monday, June 5, 2023
shawne merriman lights out
shawne merriman lights out

I use this Merriman gif any chance I get because he’s the only jersey I have (I bought it before he choked Tila Tequila and before the Chargers left San Diego, but regrettably not before he got that stupid “Lights Out” tattoo on his forearm).

BBQ Showdown.
Sunday, June 4, 2023

barbecue showdown

…or me telling everyone I know about Barbecue Showdown.

Tuesday, May 23, 2023
shi chat
shi chat
shi chat
shi chat
Tuesday, May 23, 2023

waco american apocalypse netflix

Me: Waco? Oh, it’s the 30-year anniversary.
Pammie: What happened in Waco?
Me: What do you mean, ‘What happened in Waco?’ Waco’s only known for one thing!
Pammie: I only know Waco for the Magnolia Silos LOL.

Even if I didn’t love true crime, I’d still know what happened in Waco 🤣

P.S. If you weren’t alive for Waco in 1993, you are much too young for me LOL.

Sunday, May 21, 2023
beetlejuice chat
beetlejuice chat

Are you laughing at your own joke???

– Pammie to me as I’m texting Alicia and dying of laughter

Tuesday, May 16, 2023

pammie chat

When you’re staying at your parents’ house because your sister and her husband are going to Vegas for his birthday.

Never mind that I ran out of underwear, bring my electric pepper grinder LOL.

Monday, May 15, 2023

nori chat

This article explains so much 🤣

Sidenote: The only place I’ve ever drank water from the tap is when I stayed at the Ace Hotel in Portland. The water from the kitchen faucet was so cold and refreshing. I would never drink the water from the tap from my apartment in LA! LOL. Not even if that shit was Brita’d (I would sooner get a bottled water from the liquor store next door or the gas station across the street!).

Selenite Charging Plate.
Saturday, May 13, 2023

pammie chat

I ordered some selenite charging plates because I thought I wasn’t spending enough money on crystals.

Friday, May 12, 2023

alicia chat

Because of Nurse Ratched, I’ve lost 35 pounds and gained $25k. She runs a tight ship LOL.

When I Die.
Saturday, May 6, 2023

chel rhea chat

We went to our cousins’ grandma’s viewing yesterday, and a) no one told me there were raisins in the empanadas (FYI I hate raisins in savory things, and I’ll tell anyone who’ll listen) b) Young the Giant will be played at my funeral and c) my browser history needs to be cleared when I die 🤣

Sunday, April 30, 2023

jessie chat

Jessie and I always joke that I’m gonna marry her husband following her untimely death 🤣

Friday, April 28, 2023

nori chat

These memoji are so accurate 🤣

Tuesday, April 25, 2023

shi chat

Well, I don’t work there for the 50% discount 🤣

Cat Mama.
Thursday, April 20, 2023

chel chat

Do you stay up at night googling if cat mamas get sad after you give away their kittens or are you normal???

Blue Salt.
Wednesday, April 19, 2023

nori chat

Doesn’t it, though???

P.S. Blue Salt is amazing, near my apartment, and you should totally take me there.

Rushed Recovery.
Monday, April 17, 2023

shi chat

I filed to extend my leave because I’m not ready to go back to work yet! ❤️‍🩹 I haven’t even driven since the incident, you think I can design for the interwebs?!

P.S. One time, we went to LA for some doc appointments, and we didn’t take my car, so my sister left my car keys in San Diego (along with my apartment keys attached to them) and we had to stay at the Marriott (and we never let her forget it) LOL.

Also, the first time I hiked Torrey Pines with Shi years and years ago, we parked so far and we were walking for so long and I was like, “We haven’t started hiking yet?!” LOLOL.

See’s Alarm.
Wednesday, April 12, 2023

pammie chat

I’m v serious about the half a dark salted caramel I allow myself once a day LOL.

Friday, April 7, 2023

nori chat
nori chat

I’ve dropped 30 pounds ever since my sister canceled my DoorDash membership in January, and I don’t DoorDash breakfast and dinner 5 days a week anymore ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thursday, April 6, 2023

bao chat

Does anybody want a kitten??? 😿

My sister won’t let me have a cat at her house LOL.

My dream is to have two animals (either a dog and another dog, a dog and a cat, a dog and a bunny, etc.) and for them to be best friends.

Wednesday, April 5, 2023

melissa oneil cameo

My sweet friend surprised me with a Melissa O’Neil Cameo  today (our favorite actress from The Rookie!). All of Melissa’s Cameo proceeds go to the Fresno Bully Rescue where she got her dog, Herc, who recently passed, so def get one from her if you can! Thank you, Heather! 💕

Saturday, March 18, 2023

see's scotchmallows

See’s is everywhere in LA, and I never understood how they stayed in business until I had a Dark Scotchmallow in my thirties.

I ordered some limited edition Dark Mint Scotchmallows from their website (they were sold out for St. Patty’s Day at my local See’s), and I allow myself half a piece a day LMAO.

(FYI, I also like Dark Salted Caramels and Toffee-ettes.)

Happy Birthday, BB.
Wednesday, March 8, 2023

dtf chat

I love that even when we’re in the four corners of the world we still find time to check in (yes, LA, SD, Vegas and AZ are the four corners of my very small world.) Happy 40th birthday, bb! Thanks for all the yummy grain-free treats you’ve sent my way (even though I eat them with half a cinnamon-raisin bagel) and for teaching me how to play dominoes (even though I beat you). I will watch Physical: 100 with you (because you like K-Dramas, but I also draw the line at commentary LOL). Callie soon!

Sunday, October 30, 2022

ye chat

SNL stole my skeezy joke and I am deaddd 🤣

Wednesday, September 21, 2022

redacted chat

I don’t know where this line of questioning was going, but it def wasn’t going anywhere good! Ha. Some people aren’t worth the trouble…

(Is he single now though??? JK JK LOL 😬)

The Chi.
Saturday, July 23, 2022

chat chicago

Excited to get some italian beef in me next weekend. Any other Chicago recs besides an underground donut tour? 😂

Friday, July 22, 2022

chat floor burrito

The day I eat a floor burrito is the day I give up on life.

Thursday, June 30, 2022
but i already did something today
but i already did something today
but i already did something today

Our project manager put in his notice yesterday, the other senior web designer has been out sick since last week, and my boss just went on vacation today. Everything’s fine 😅

Wednesday, August 18, 2021

90s brown lip liner

I apologize if you knew me and my brown chola lip liner in the 90s!

Sunday, June 13, 2021

dtf venmo

Contrary to popular belief, DTF is just a dim sum place I ate at with Christine, Pammie and Jessie today.

Also, I didn’t realize that venmo automatically adds my phone contacts to my friend list, which would explain why I know that the guy I sold tickets to on craigslist in 2012 paid for his share of the wifi bill last month.

Thursday, April 8, 2021
chat ray ketchup shortage
chat ray ketchup shortage
chat ray ketchup shortage

You ask for ketchup at a steakhouse once and nobody ever lets you forget it.

Wednesday, January 6, 2021

garage break in text

Luckily, my neighbors drive maseratis and porsches, so my mazda hatchback and glove compartment full of hi-chews went untouched.

Monday, August 10, 2020

coochielations 1:69

What religion is this and how do I convert???

Wednesday, May 20, 2020

90 day fiance

Shi thinks I’m attracted to anyone with a beard, and she ain’t wrong. Also, why is this the second convo I’ve had about 90 Day Fiancé today???

Quarantine Cooking.
Sunday, April 26, 2020

filipino food chat

You guys, this quarantine is really domesticating us.

Also, never have I ever texted / facetimed / zoomed so much in my goddamn life. I can’t promise that this blog won’t devolve into just screenshots of me talking to people. Fair warning.

Plan of Action.
Monday, April 20, 2020

work chat
the office dwight rage gif
work chat

I’m one revision away from breaking some muthafuckin’ knees! Just kidding (please don’t furlough me).

Sunday, April 5, 2020

zoom drinks

I put on my brows for this happy hour, but I did not put on my pants.

MySpace Tracker