He said, “baby, ” that’s what he called me, “I love you”
Every single word you say makes me feel some type of way It’s the thought of you that slightly scares me But it takes my breath away, forget what I was gonna say The day that I met you, I started dreaming Now I write ’em down if I remember in the morning time
I just want a daddy who sends me songs that make him think of me đ I told Jessie to tell Nixon (who’s in middle school), it doesn’t get easier in your 40s đ
I want you in the worst way
Is the gate code still your birthday?
John Mayer will forever be my guiltiest pleasure.
My Shi just got engaged to the love of her life, and I couldnât be happier for her.
She gave me these two rose quartz crystals a few months ago, because âlove comes in pairs,â she said. Iâve never been a believer of crystals, but I did buy this cute ass dish for them (I still believe in good home decor, after all). I keep them on my bar cart in the feng shui-recommended “love corner” of my apartment. The booze around it will likely be of more assistance to my love life than the art of feng shui or crystals, but I appreciate Shiâs effort! Ha.
Congrats, love!
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La La Land was def overhyped, but this dream sequence of what could have been was everything 💔
<3
<3 (@ Poinsettia & Melrose)
Perhaps, somewhere, some day, at a less miserable time, we may see each other again.
![i still love the people i've loved, even if i cross the street to avoid them. - uma thurman, w magazine](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/istilllove.jpg)
She was the third beer. Not the first one, which the throat receives with almost tearful gratitude; nor the second, that confirms and extends the pleasure of the first. But the third, the one you drink because it’s there, because it can’t hurt, and because what difference does it make?
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If people want to let you go, just let them do it. They may not understand who you are. So donât play around with fire; donât give them their cake and let them eat it, too. Here is your rule of thumb: they either commit to you or get none of you.
All I want in life.
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It took me so long to do so many important things. Itâs hard to accept that I spent so many years being less happy than I couldâve been. Jim was five feet from my desk and it took me four years to get to him. Itâd be great if people saw this documentary and learned from my mistakes. Not that Iâm a tragic person, Iâm really happy now. But it would just make my heart soar if someone out there saw this and she said to herself, âBe strong. Trust yourself. Love yourself. Conquer your fears. Just go after what you want and act fast! Because life just isnât that long!â
![jessie email](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/jessiechat.jpg)
These are obviously in order from least to most important.
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All my favorite vampire couples are breaking up. Nothing lasts forever. Not even the love between immortals. Why even bother setting up an OKCupid profile???
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STEFAN: How does anyone ever seem to move on?
CAROLINE: I think that someday, you’ll meet someone new, and you’ll fall madly in love, and you’ll have moved on without even realizing it.
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Girls = new obsession.
You have nothing. You have a pile of secrets and lies, and you’re calling it love. And in the meantime, you’re letting your whole life pass you by while they raise children, and celebrate anniversaries, and grow old together. You’re frozen in time. You’re holding your breath. You’re a statue waiting for something that’s never going to happen. Living for stolen moments… you keep telling yourself they all add up to something real, because in your mind they have to, but they don’t. They won’t. They never will, because stolen moments aren’t a life. So you have nothing. You have no one.
![valentine's day text message](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/valentinesday-textmessage.jpg)
This is pretty much how the rest of my day went.
BRB dying.
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The sound that came out of my mouth was not human.
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OLIVIA: I wait for you. I watch for you. My whole life is you. I can’t breathe because I’m waiting for you. You own me, you control me, I belong to youâŚ
FITZ: You own me! You control me. I belong to you. You think I don’t want to be a better man? You think that I don’t want to dedicate myself to my marriage? You don’t think I want to be honorable? To be the man you voted for? I love you. I’m in love with you. You’re the love of my life. My every feeling is controlled by the look on your face. I can’t breathe without you. I can’t sleep without you. I wait for you, I watch for you. I exist for you. If I could escape all of this and run away with you? There’s no Sally and Thomas here. You’re nobody’s victim, Liv. I belong to you. We’re in this together.
…
I stayed home from work for a couple of days this week… partly because I have the flu, but mostly because I wanted to catch up on Scandal!
I may be a little late to this party, but how awesome is this show???
33 Facts You Learn About Mindy Kaling by Hanging Around Her
15. Right now, Kaling is single âand enjoying-slash-tolerating it,â she says. âIt seems like when I have a serious relationship with someone, despite my schedule and everything else, they find a time to pursue me and date me. So I have this maybe naĂŻve thing of, like, âWell, theyâll just find me.â You know? âThey will figure it out and find me and we will work it out.ââ 16. Itâs a belief that comes from how her parents met: In Nigeria, where her father was the architect designing the wing of the hospital her mother was working in. âShe didnât plan it, it just happened,â says Kaling. âShe moved to Nigeria to be a doctor and was just living there and my dad met her and he pursued her. And as my grandmother always said, the best relationships are the ones where the guy likes the girl a little bit more than the girl likes the guy. So great, Iâm busy. Iâm doing something I love. And if someone really likes me, they will come and find me. I donât mean that like, âOh come find me.â Like Iâm this little daisy and Iâm not a strong woman. I mean that if someone is willing, and they see what my schedule is, and they are really that interested, weâll find a way. I donât have to change that much.â |
Mumford & Sons – I Will Wait
And I will wait
I will wait for you
But I believe good things happen everyday. I believe good things happen even when bad things happen. And I believe on a happy day like today, we can still feel a little sad. That’s life, isn’t it?
You are a souvenir shop, where he goes to remember how much people miss him when he is gone.
heartworm, n.
a relationship or friendship that you canât get out of your head, which you thought had faded long ago but is still somehow alive and unfinished, like an abandoned campsite whose smoldering embers still have the power to start a forest fire.
All or nothing was bullshit. It never worked out that way. Life was all about taking what you could get when you could get it and surviving when it wasn’t enough.
ROBIN: She’s got you on the hook.
TED: What? I’m not on the hook.
ROBIN: Ted, “right now” is the classic on-the-hook catchphrase.
MARSHALL: Yup. “Right now” paints a picture of some sort of magical future time when everything will work out, but the truth is, that will never happen.
ROBIN: You like having Henrietta around for the same reason that Tiffany likes having you aroundâit’s a nice little ego boost. She’s stringing you along. She’s not committing to you, but she’s keeping you around just in case, like an old can of chili in the pantry.
Um, who’s buying canned chili and not eating it immediately???
Barnito Supreme speaks the truth.
You can’t save a damsel if she loves her distress…
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RUSSELL: Look, Jess, I’ve already done the crazy, explosive passion thing. When I was with Ouli, it was like edging closer and closer to a wood chipper… I’m not looking for that anymore.
JESS: I understand. But I am. And I want passion. Even if it’s harder and hurts more.
Is it just me, or does everyone else’s room get a little dusty whenever they watch google chrome commercials?
A man fishes for two reasons: he’s either sport fishing or fishing to eat, which means he’s either going to try to catch the biggest fish he can, take a picture of it, admire it with his buddies and toss it back to sea, or he’s going to take that fish on home, scale it, fillet it, toss it in some cornmeal, fry it up, and put it on his plate. This, I think, is a great analogy for how men seek out women. It’s not the guy who determines whether you’re a sports fish or a keeperâit’s you. Every word you say, every move you make, every signal you give to a man will help him determine whether he should try to play you, be straight with you, or move on to the next woman to do a little more sport fishing.
Mr. Hightower speaks an insane amount of truth.
I have found my new spiritual leader. Teach me your ways, oh wise one.
Unless itâs mad, passionate, extraordinary love, itâs a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldnât be one of them.
Via Slowly, But Shirley:
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Thereâs usually a scene in all my favorite shows that never fails to get me all choked up… like this scene from The Office where they explain how Jimâs feelings about Pam is what caused Pamâs dad to decide to leave her mom. Sometimes getting a taste of how things should be makes you realize youâre in the wrong place⌠|
DAVE: You might not meet not somebody tonight, but you will meet someone.
PENNY: You promise?
DAVE: Yes… as long as you promise to stop slobbering all over the champagne.
PENNY: I can’t promise that.
ROBIN: I am never going to have closure. Okay, closure doesn’t exist. It just… ended. And, no matter how much I try to forget that it happened, it will have never not happened. Don and I will always be a loose end. We will always beâ
TED: Unfinished. GaudĂ, to his credit, never gave up on his dream. But that’s not usually how it goes. Most of the time it’s just too difficult, too expensive, too scary. It’s only once you’ve stopped that you realize how hard it is to start again, so you force yourself not to want it. But it’s always there. And until you finish it, it will always be…
HAL: Well, let’s say that since you were little, you always dreamed of getting a lion. And you wait, and you wait, and you wait, and you wait but the lion doesn’t come. And along comes a giraffe. You can be alone, or you can be with the giraffe.
OLIVER: I’d wait for the lion.
HAL: That’s why I worry about you.
If you have chemistry, you only need one other thing. Timing. But timing’s a bitch.
![mindy kaling - is everyone hanging out without me?](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/mindykalingbook.jpg)
Why You Need A Man, Not A Boy | Mindy Kaling via Glamour
Until I was 30, I dated only boys. Iâll tell you why: Men scared the sh*t out of me. Men know what they want. Men own alarm clocks. Men sleep on a mattress that isnât on the floor. Men buy new shampoo instead of adding water to a nearly empty bottle of shampoo. Men make reservations. Men go in for a kiss without giving you some long preamble about how theyâre thinking of kissing you. Men wear clothes that have never been worn by anyone else before.
OK, maybe men arenât exactly like this. But this is what Iâve cobbled together from the handful of men I know or know of, ranging from Heathcliff Huxtable to Theodore Roosevelt to my dad. The point: Men know what they want, and that is scary. What I was used to was boys. Boys are adorable. Boys trail off their sentences in an appealing way. Boys get haircuts from their roommate, who âtotally knows how to cut hair.â Boys can pack up their whole life and move to Brooklyn for a gig if they need to. Boys have âgigs.â Boys are broke. And when they do have money, they spend it on a trip to Colorado to see a music festival. Boys can talk for hours with you in a diner at three in the morning because they donât have regular work hours. But they suck to date when you turn 30. So Iâm into men now, even though they can be frightening. I want a schedule-keeping, waking-up-early, wallet-carrying man. I donât care if he takes prescription drugs for cholesterol or hair loss. (I donât want that, but I can handle it. Iâm a grown-up too.) |
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When I was 19, my co-worker Mike took one look at my 21-year-old boyfriend and told me that I needed to date a real man (Mike was 30 with tattoo sleeves on both armsâI’m pretty sure he was talking about himself). Fast forward 10 years, and I’m still not dating real men! Maybe I’ll consider upgrading when I turn 30… in 3 months. Yikes. |
![goldspot - let's rewind - how i met your mother - asking you to stay the words are finally here](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/letsrewind-himym.jpg)
Goldspot – Rewind
[audio:http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/GoldSpot – Rewind.mp3]
Quote of the day:
If they will do it with you, they will do it to you.
Dinner with friends turned into an emergency girl boy session at Station Tavern last night. Afterward, I polished off an entire bottle of wine by myself like I was the one hurting! Or… like it was just another Tuesday. Ha.
August was a tough month for love! Hello, September. I hope you’re amazeballs.
The universe is obvi confused about what we want, judging by the excessive amount of emergency girl sessions, tears and vino consumed this past month. So the girls and I wrote our own letters to the universe last night and lit that shit on fire.
We were enjoying some sangria afterward when the man at the neighboring fire pit offered us some brisket. Was the universe answering my letter already? Maybe I should have been more specific when I said I wanted more meat in my life!
Ubiquitous, adj.
When itâs going well, the fact of it is everywhere. Itâs there in the song that shuffles into your ears. Itâs there in the book youâre reading. Itâs there on the shelves of the store as you reach for a towel and forget about the towel. Itâs there as you open the door. As you stare off into the subway, itâs what youâre looking at. You wear it on the inside of your hat. It lines your pockets. Itâs the temperature.
The hitch, of course, is that when itâs going badly, itâs in all the same places.
![nostalgia](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/nostalgia.jpg)
So avoid using the word âveryâ because itâs lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Donât use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boysâto woo womenâand, in that endeavour, laziness will not do.
TOM: Why’d you dance with me?
SUMMER: ‘Cause I wanted to.
TOM: You just do what you want, don’t you?
Clouds part
Just to give us a little sun
There’s a limit to your love
A Fine Frenzy – Ashes & Wine
[audio:http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/A Fine Frenzy – Ashes And Wine.mp3]
Is there a chance
A fragment of light at the end of the tunnel
A reason to fight
I’ve read your entire blog from beginning to end and it made me laugh, cry and everything in between. When I was reading I kept thinking, you’re so honest and you’re not afraid to say what you feel. If I ever bump into you on the streets of SD I would totally give you a big hug and say, Thank you!
Holy balls! Beginning to end??? When I started this blog in 2003, all I talked about was concerts, food and my boyfriend. 8 years later, I’m still blogging about concerts, food and my (now ex) boyfriends! Some things never change…
I feel like I lead a different life on the interwebs, because IRL I’m not this candid. Here, I’m not afraid to admit that I still think about you without feeling like a total idiot… Maybe you’ll read it, but most likely you won’t. It’s easier to say these things when you think that no one is listening.
If you were able to identify with anything I’ve written these past 8 years, then I’m glad you found my blog đ
The Warblers – Somewhere Only We Know (Keane Cover)
[audio:http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/Glee – Somewhere Only We Know.mp3]
And if you have a minute why don’t we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know
This could be the end of everything
So why don’t we go somewhere only we know
dispel, v.
It was the way you said, “I have something to tell you.” I could feel the magic drain from the room.
HENRY: I didn’t want to tell you, because as long as you didn’t know, there was still… I don’t know… some fantasy where you and I could be together.
BETTY: Sometimes we want things to be different. We think maybe if we pretend that they are… fool people… that’s enough. But it never is.
I have a habit of getting addicted to shows after they’ve already been canceled. And I hate when they say, “To be continued…” at the end of an episode, because even when it’s past my bedtime, I have to continue.
This one time I painted a living room with a girl.
This was a handful of years back. It was about eight months before the huge, flame-out of a breakup. That day, though? That day we painted the living room? It was pretty uneventful. We painted my parents living room for $50 between us and a pizza. That was it. I think we watched Anchorman or something after that. But it still holds as one of the most indelible memories I have. Donât get me wrong, Iâm not still in love, it happened, it was good, it ended, and weâve both moved on. But Iâll never forget that day. Because itâs never, in the long run, about the grand gestures. You can fly across the world and show up on her doorstep with a rose in your teeth and a ring in a little velvet box but I can guarantee you that – more often than not – sheâs going to remember the time you built the birdhouse in the back yard, or what have you, a whole lot more. Life wasnât meant to be taken in large movements. The next day will inevitably arrive, youâll sleep, and the moment will have passed. But when you have a hundred thousand small moments, you can step back and appreciate the picture a lot more than metaphorically blowing your load on some grand moment that, in all honesty, look, youâre not Bruce Fucking Springsteen, youâre not going to be able to blow everyoneâs mind every single night. Youâre not Romeo and/or Juliet. Thereâs no reason to drink the poison together in some flame-out gesture. So that leaves us with the small stuff. Itâs all about the detail. Thatâs what love is. Attention to detail. And the moment will end. And then things will get boring. And it might get a little quiet. And it might all end horribly. And you might hate each other at the end. And you might walk away from each other one day and never speak again. But thatâs just how it goes. But sheâll remember the time you held the door open for her on your first date. But everything ends. And Iâll tell you why you have to make the small things, the small moments count so much more: One day, probably a while longer from now, when old age takes a hold of someone, she might just only remember your smile. Everything you ever did together, every second, every moment, every beat, every morning spent in bed, every evening spent together on the sofa, all of that – gone. Everything you ever did will be reduced to the head of a pin. She wonât remember your name. Sheâll just remember your smile, and sheâll smile. She wonât know why. Itâs a base, gut reaction. But sheâll smile, uncontrollably, and it will come from somewhere so deep as to know that you touched her on a primal, honest, and true level that no scientist, scholar, or savant could ever begin to explain. There is no more. There is nothing else. There is just this: Sheâll remember your smile, and sheâll smile. And you know what? Thatâs all that really matters in the end. |
Arlene’s 7-year-old daughter, Gisella, made me a Valentine’s Day card at school because she knew I didn’t have a Valentine this year. Thanks for the reminder, kid! Haha. I love that little munchkin. I would pin her card up in my cube at work, but it’d be overshadowed by Belle’s gaggle of heart-shaped balloons!
Adele – Someone Like You (Live Acoustic)
[audio:http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/Adele – Someone Like You (Live Acoustic).mp3]
I heard that you’re settled down
That you found a girl and you’re married now
I heard that your dreams came true
Guess she gave you things I didn’t give to you
Prince Erik: People in love don’t try to kill each other.
Nikita: Are you serious?
Some people pass through your life and you never think about them again. Some you think about and wonder what ever happened to them. Some you wonder if they ever wonder what happened to you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do.
The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd; the longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the worldâs existence. All these half-tones of the soulâs consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are.
Can’t wait to watch Blue Valentine tonight with the girls!
Nothing in this universe happens just once. Infinity goes in both directions. There is no unique event, no singular moment. It means you will get another chance.
Whatever happened to chivalry? Does it only exist in 80’s movies? I want John Cusack holding a boombox outside my window. I wanna ride off on a lawnmower with Patrick Dempsey. I want Jake from Sixteen Candles waiting outside the church for me. I want Judd Nelson thrusting his fist into the air because he knows he got me. Just once I want my life to be like an 80’s movie, preferably one with a really awesome musical number for no apparent reason. But no, no, John Hughes did not direct my life.
Glee Cast – The Only Exception (Paramore Cover)
[audio:http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/Glee Cast – The Only Exception.mp3]
I’ve got a tight grip on reality
But I can’t let go of what’s in front of me here
I know you’re leaving in the morning when you wake up
Leave me with some kind of proof it’s not a dream
One of my favorite songs covered by one of my favorite TV shows ♥
For everything you have missed, you have gained something else. And for everything you gain, you lose something else.
![the only thing that makes it a part of your life is that you keep thinking about it](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/thinkingaboutit.jpg)
(image via plastic-sfoonss)
Sometimes when you look back on a situation, you realize it wasn’t all you thought it was. Someone walked into your life, you fell in love, or did you? Maybe it was only a childish infatuation, or maybe it was a brief moment of insanity.
The BFF told me about Il Postino’s new girlfriend today, and I felt nothing. Itâs funny how I always used to find myself running back to him, for some reason, thinking it would work out differently the second third fourth fifth time. And now, I can’t think of a single reason why I’d ever want him back.
Prints of this illustration I designed are now available in my Etsy shop for $10! They are 11″ x 17″ and professionally printed by digital press on 100 lb. paper gloss.
Human beings are funny. They long to be with the person they love but refuse to admit openly. Some are afraid to show even the slightest sign of affection because of fear. Fear that their feelings may not be recognized, or even worst, returned. But one thing about human beings puzzles me the most is their conscious effort to be connected with the object of their affection even if it kills them slowly within.
Neon Trees – Sins of My Youth
Call me crazy, I was born to make a mess
Would you love me still if I were to confess
That I had a little too much fun back when I was young
I’ve got these habits that I cannot break
And as I’m older there is more at stake
Go ahead and call me fake, but these are the sins
The sins of my youth
I’ve got wallowing down to a science… I spent the better half of 2006 perfecting it, after all. I’m not gonna lie, my usual method of getting over someone is by getting under someone else. But I’m realizing that happiness is an inside job. I can’t sit here waiting for another guy to come along to stop wallowing about the last one. One day, you just have to decide not to be sad anymore. And that day was today. Well, actually it was Friday, but killing a few bottles of wine with Anthony foiled that plan. And then I decided it was yesterday. But while getting drinks with friends, one of the employees came up to our table and asked if any of us were he who shall not be named, because he who shall not be named had a phone call. Coincidence or cruel joke? As I walked out wondering if it was a sign, I looked up to the sky, dramatically shook my fist at the heavens, and almost got hit by a car. And so I decided that today would be the day (again). It’s barely noon, but I’m feeling optimistic. I mean, I’m going to Phil’s for lunch… If a beefy rib tickler isn’t guaranteed happiness, I don’t know what is.
Letting go doesnât mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be.
It’s a lot easier to be lost than found. It’s the reason we’re always searching and rarely discoveredâso many locks, not enough keys.
Since the first day you reached out to me, I kept searching for hints of the relationship you kept from me. I couldn’t see it in the description of your morning routine or your weekend recaps, but I could feel it in your absent admission to the contrary. I planned to keep quiet and let this fade out, as I do with everything else I feel isn’t worth fighting for. But this was you. And to me, you have always been worth it. So I finally got up the nerve to say,
Are you seeing anyone?
I knew the answer before I even asked the question. I should have asked you this in the beginning, but I convinced myself that you wouldn’t hide something like that from me. Except you did. And while you justified it by not doing anything more than correspond back and forth, the line was already crossed when you first contacted me, and you’ve been on the other side of it ever since.
At least I know that you didn’t just dismiss me as some reckless fling you had when we were younger. I can’t be mad at you for wanting to talk to me, but what was the point of this, other than resurrecting all these memories I haven’t thought about in years? It’s like you just came back to remind me that you still can’t do this. Even if you didn’t know what you were looking to get out of this in the beginning, you made the choice not to tell me about her for months. What did you want from me?
You and I will always have some unfinished business, but eventually, it’ll be as it was. You’ll forget about me. I’ll forget about you.
![absence polaroid](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/absencepolaroid.jpg)
You’ve been out of my life for years, but somehow your absence is more tangible now than it ever was. How can I miss something I never had?
Well, I’d say I’ve successfully fulfilled my nostalgia quota for the week year.
This trip down memory lane ended at my old friend/ex-love’s 30th birthday party last night. It’s strange to see someone you’ve spent so much of your life with and feel nothing… And to think of someone else you didn’t spend nearly enough time with and feel everything.
She wanted something else, something different, something more. Passion and romance, perhaps. Or maybe a quiet, heartfelt conversation into the wee hours of the night. Or perhaps something as simple as not being second.
(image via thewordsalloverme)
We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It’s easy. The first girl I ever loved was someone I knew in sixth grade. Her name was Missy; we talked about horses. The last girl I love will be someone I haven’t even met yet, probably. They all count. But there are certain people you love who do something else; they define how you classify what love is supposed to feel like. These are the most important people in your life, and youâll meet maybe four or five of these people over the span of 80 years. But thereâs still one more tier to all this; there is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these loveable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else, and theyâre often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really, want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else.
(image via the beholder)
Don’t say a word, just come over and lie here with me
‘Cause I’m just about to set fire to everything I see
I want you so bad I’ll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it, I’m scared you’ll forget about me
![it looks like rain tonight](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/raintonight.jpg)
Yesterday, there was an unexpected venti iced sugar-free vanilla soy latte waiting for me at my desk when I got to work in the morning. Christine treated me out to pizza and beer at Pizza Port for dinner. And then I ended the night at an amazing $10 Temper Trap show with my girls.
Today was nothing like yesterday.
(image via thresca)
(image via luftschloss)
![if you want to know where your heart is, look where your mind goes when it wanders](http://www.mayanrocks.com/blog/balloons.jpg)
If a guy is treating you like he doesn’t give a shit, he genuinely doesn’t give a shit. No exceptions.
Oh, oh, I want some more
Oh, oh, what are you waiting for?
Take a bite of my heart tonight
SpongeBob: What do you usually do when I’m gone?
Patrick: Wait for you to come back.
(image via sanahasflickr.)
For some people, love doesnât exist unless you acknowledge it in front of other people.
Another 3am text message from Il Postino this weekend. It’s always back and forth with us. He drunk messages me one weekend. I do it the next. He does it again, but this time he’s just trying to be funnyâ”trying” being the operative word here. I know he’s mocking my drunken text from the weekend before, so I tell him he’s lucky I’m awake at that unholy hour. And then I remember that I purposely ignored his messages on Valentine’s Day, so he thinks things are okay between us now that I’ve broken my silence. Every time I get off this carousel, I just get back on again, spinning around and around knowing this ride always makes me sick.