I was woken up today by an earthquake in Malibu. I just went back to sleep, partly because it was 4:22 in the morning, but mostly because the earthquake was only 3.6 (when it comes to earthquakes and boys, I only get up for a 6 or above 😆).

I had to use the stove last night, so I moved my new air fryer toaster oven from on top of the stove to on top of the fridge and pushed the glass canisters of sugar and flour to the edge. ‘They’ll be fine up here as long as there isn’t an earthquake,’ I thought.

This reminds me of the time I moved out of my apartment in La Mesa. Shi and I set my bed frame on its side to see if I could get it out of my bedroom without having to break it down. After finding out it could fit through the door in one piece, we left it propped up against the wall.

This is the conversation that followed:

me: Aren’t you gonna help me put the bed frame back down?
Shi: Just leave it. It’ll be easier to move tomorrow.
me: What if it falls on me while I’m sleeping?
Shi: It’s NOT going to fall on you!
me: But what if there’s an earthquake?
Shi: There’s not going to be a damn earthquake, crazy!

Can you guess what woke me up the next morning? I survived the earthquake, obvi… no thanks to you, Shirley May!

I had a hypoglycemic event this morning.

I had just eaten my breakfast sandwich and was going to go on a walk to get my steps in and get some iced coffee. Pammie was gonna come with me, but she kept forgetting shit (her sunglasses, her keys) and the house is 4 floors, so I just waited downstairs while she kept going up and down for whatever she forgot. I wear a continuous glucose monitor, and it alerted me that my glucose levels were low. They’ve never actually been low when it has alerted me before, it usually happens when I put a new device in (every 10 days), and I just have to test my blood and recalibrate it and it’s fine. This time, though, I was sweating (even though the A/C was on in the house) and I felt off, so I tested my blood and my glucose levels were really low. Good thing I start getting ready for Halloween in July, so I had candy on hand 😆 I ate some and felt way better! I walked to Casa de Otay for iced coffee after and didn’t even break a sweat (I hardly ever sweat, so that also tipped me off that something was wrong earlier).

I have a continuous glucose monitor device that alerts me on my phone if my levels are too low or too high, but there are service dogs who are trained to also alert you. I ignore my phone notifs all the time, but I would never ignore a puppy 😆

Just a friendly reminder to listen to your body! 🙃

What better day to watch Beetlejuice Beetlejuice than Friday the 13th???

There were a lot of call backs to the original film, so I loved it. I feel like if you weren’t a fan of the first movie, you wouldn’t like this weird ass sequel.

For those who asked about the shirt I wore to the theater (literally no one), yes, I designed it on my Cricut, and yes, it glows in the dark 🖤💚

(via @michaelslayersofficial)

Also, I need more friends like these who would recognize and appreciate my morbid side 😆

What time did they even film this? It’s impossible to get a picture at LACMA’s Urban Light installment without a gaggle of tourists in the background.

I’m a little obsessed with Beetlejuice.

No one commenting on my shirt reminded me of last Halloween when Jess helped me carve a Beetlejuice pumpkin, and Christine thought we were carving Albert Einstein 🤣

(via @localspookydude)

Where’s the lie? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Just before my stroke, I was gifted an Our Place Perfect Pot. I forgot how nice it was to cook with quality nonstick pans. My sister has a fancy gourmet kitchen, complete with two KitchenAid ovens, a KitchenAid stove, KitchenAid dishwasher, KitchenAid fridge, KitchenAid wine cellar, and a huge quartz waterfall island (she bought the biggest model home), but, like our mother, she doesn’t cook 😆 Her husband cooks sometimes, but he either uses the gas grill on the rooftop, the pans he got for free from the casino LOL, or what’s left of the Calphalon cookware set we won nearly 15 years ago on Ellen DeGeneres’ 12 Days of Giveaways!

I’m like the jambalaya fairy, because I made extra for Nori & Sachi, Pammie & Dennis, Christine & Francis. Many have eaten my food, few have died. Just kidding. (Not that many people have eaten my food.)

I meal prepped so I don’t fall into old habits (doordashing breakfast and dinner everyday and spending a gazillion dollars on food 😅). I still go out to lunch with Nori during the week, though (a bunch of new restos opened in the south bay while I was gone, and I have to try them all).

(@ Lobster-Guys)

(@ Pita Café)

It was Nori’s dog Kona’s birthday over the weekend, so I brought her some toys. She loved them all, especially the piñata stuffie 🥰

Nori’s icon status at Nordstrom, so she invited me to join her for a complimentary dinner at Ruscello. We were treated like celebrities LOL!

We were able to find primo parking at South Coast Plaza with my handicap placard, and her mom and sister were like, ‘You’re invited to go out with us anytime!” 😆

Her mom gave me one of her long ass shoe horns when she saw me struggling to put on my shoes 😅 They make slipping on my Vans a breeze 👵🏻

I was gonna buy a new oven a few years ago, because the one in my apartment is tiny and electric. But since I was in the market for an air fryer, I got this Breville Air Fryer Toaster Oven combo. I have zero counter space, though (the kitchen in my studio is smaller than my bathroom at my sister’s house LOL), so I have to set it on top of my oven 😅

The first thing I made in it was a personal pizza.

The power turned off a few times in the 15 minutes it took to cook the pizza, and I had to flip the switch in the circuit breaker a couple times. It probably couldn’t handle the A/C and oven on at the same time, but I was like, ‘Come on… Don’t make me choose between A/C and pizza.’ 😅

Yes, that’s turkey pepperoni and yes, I know I need to calm down on the olives 😜

Jessie sent us this pic of baby boy at his first Padres game. He wears a little helmet to gently shape his head, and Jess found a place that customizes cranial bands, so she got him a Padres wrap 🤎💛

File under: Reasons I’d want a child (there are very few LOL).

I doordashed breakfast from Urth Caffe this morning—an iced Spanish latte and a Sunrise Pizza. The poached egg that came on top of the breakfast pizza was way overcooked again (the yolk was cooked all the way through!). I went to Urth with Nori for lunch before, and I ordered the same thing. I was like, ‘Get this shot, Nori’ before I cut into my poached egg expecting a runny yolk, but the egg was cooked solid LOL.

I love a good breakfast pizza, and my favorite one is from Big Sur Bakery (I just saw it burned down a few months ago!). I still ate the pizza without the solid ass egg 😜

Another time, I was at brunch with Jessie and we both ordered chilaquiles, but I ordered my eggs ‘over easy’ while she ordered hers ‘over medium’. I was like, ‘WTF is over medium?’ She was like, ‘Where they flip the egg, but the yolk is still runny.’ I was like, ‘Isn’t that over easy?’ She was all, ‘Don’t they not flip it when it’s over easy?’ I was like, ‘Nah, that’s sunny side up.’ She was like, ‘Let’s see how they come out.’ We got our order and our eggs were cooked the same 😂 Apparently, they don’t know the difference between over easy and over medium at La Sabrosita, either!

Here are some helpful charts:

Update: Jessie studied abroad in Spain and is married to a Mexican guy, but she’s the whitest Asian we know 😆

While I was away, they opened a Salt & Straw in Manhattan Beach and a Magnolia Bakery ghost kitchen in Torrance, all within doordashable distance to my apartment. This does not bode well for my blood glucose levels. Or my waistline 😅

Keane – Somewhere Only We Know

And if you have a minute, why don’t we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don’t we go somewhere only we know?

Keane – Everybody’s Changing

Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody’s changing and I don’t feel the same

Keane – A Bad Dream

And when will I meet my end?
In a better time you could be my friend
I wake up, it’s a bad dream
No one on my side
I was fighting
But I just feel too tired to be fighting
Guess I’m not the fighting kind
Wouldn’t mind it
If you were by my side
But you’re long gone
Yeah, you’re long gone now

Keane – We Might as Well Be Strangers

I don’t know your thoughts these days
We’re strangers in an empty space
I don’t understand your heart
It’s easier to be apart
We might as well be strangers in another town
We might as well be living in another town
We might as well
We might as well
We might as well be strangers

Keane at The Greek and street dogs. It doesn’t get more LA than this!

Thank you Nori and Sachi for making my first day back so amazing 🥰

When you move back to LA during a heat wave 😅

I bought this portable A/C unit during the Great Heat Wave of 2022, and it’s probably the best decision I’ve ever made (to be fair, I’ve made a lot of bad decisions).

Last 2-in-1 Burrito from Lolita’s before I go back to LA tonight ✌🏻

Yes, I’ll be back in SD for a lash appointment next week, and yes, I will probably get Lolita’s again 😆

Whose CD is this? Asking for a friend 😆

Harry Potter x Padres (@ Petco Park)

Pammie: There are a lot of Slytherins here.

Me: Look, that guy’s wearing a cape!
Pammie: That’s not a cape, it’s a robe.
Me: Well, that other guy’s wearing an actual robe *points at guy wearing a bath robe* LOL

As Rob Riggle commentated before they started, ‘My heart’s on Kobayashi, but my money’s on Chestnut!’ 🤣 I knew Joey was gonna win, but I felt bad for Kobayashi and the crying Japanese fans in the audience 😅

The last time I had sangria slushies was at Las Hadas downtown after a Padres game, and Christine was also with me and reminded me of some very bad decisions I made that night 😅 We also ran into Pammie’s brother-in-law that same night and he told her his now infamous line, ‘Tell your sister she was sloppy.’ Although some knee-dropping chismé came out during brunch, none of it had to do with me this time 😆 Ask me again in 10 years 😅

This brunch was way overdue. We were supposed to get together when I came back from Spain, but I caught Covid. Then we rescheduled, but Pammie caught Covid in Vegas. We’re all healthy now, but work has been stressing us all out while Shi’s over here starting a book club at her work 🤣

I suggested Flama Llama because I saw it on instagram. I love llamas, so liking these fuckers fucked up my algorithm 😆

Everything was so amazing and flavorful. I’ve had Peruvian food before, but this was exceptional. Just ask Shi (she ordered 4 entrees LOL).

Jambalaya is like everything I love in one dish: Shrimp? ✅ Sausage? ✅ Rice? ✅ Heat? ✅

I followed this recipe and added some Flatiron Pepper Co Four Pepper Blend for extra spice, and it was *chef’s kiss*. Not to be dramatic or anything, but it was only the best thing I’ve ever cooked. Someone make an honest woman out of me already 😆

My sister’s husband requested I make another batch before I go. I have a concert in LA with friends this Thursday, so I’ll be going back to my apartment in LA later this week. It’s been real ✌🏻

Spooky Nugs and tots for dinner. Dennis was like, ‘What are you, five?’ 😆

Um, would a 5-year-old illegally download a PG-13 M. Knight Shyamalan thriller and eat kettle corn out of a Mcdonald’s Boo Bucket??? (Don’t answer that).

Since I started Stepbet last month, I’ve walked a total of 243 miles and won a whopping $25. Sure, the membership fee to join Stepbet was $60, and I spent more than my total winnings alone at Starbucks this week, but at least I walked to Starbucks 😅

I’ll make concessions for a lot of things as long as you don’t force your beliefs on me, but I draw the line at Raiders fans 😆

I feel personally attacked 😅

When I was 12, I was busy watching My So-Called Life, while other kids my age were watching soft shit like Sailor Moon. This show is the reason I love Jared Leto, men who wear flannel, and Violent Femmes 😆

There’s this sharp ass agave plant under the doorbell in front of my sister’s house. When I was installing the Ring, I dropped one of the screws and couldn’t get it because it fell into the plant, so I had to order spare parts. Before the spares arrived, my dad tried to get the screw in the plant even though I warned him the plant was really sharp and it was impossible. He ended up poking himself on one of the sharp ass plant spikes and asking for Neosporin. It’s a good thing my sister’s my father’s daughter, because there was Neosporin and sanitizer in her bathroom. I can guarantee you there’s no Neosporin in my apartment in LA 😅

I go to baseball games for the food and post-game fireworks. Also, on my walk this afternoon, this guy who always says hi to me asked me if they won. I was wearing my Padres hat, but mostly to protect my face from the sun 😅 Just like I only wear my Dodgers hat when I have bedhead, and I never wear my Padres hat in LA and vice versa. Good thing I looked up their stats for this chat string, because I was able to tell the guy that they have a night game today, so they haven’t played yet, but they won their last three games 😆

I had a shitty day at work today, so I took a walk to Starbucks, got my steps in, and got my new favorite drink: an Iced Mocha Latte with no whip and 2 pumps of Cinnamon Dolce Syrup (it tastes just like a Mexican mocha!). I feel so much better, but I might have a menty b later, IDK.

Whenever I’m having a shitty day at work, I just remind myself that at least I’m doing better than the people my sister had to lay off today because of a company re-org, and remind myself how much I’m getting paid to put up with this shit 😆

I love Bobby Flay.

Even though I used to think he was an asshole ever since he jumped on the cutting board during an Iron Chef battle against Chef Morimoto in 2000 (I was more offended when he yelled, ‘Raise the roof, yo!’ tbh) and he’s since been thrice-divorced, but I kinda like assholes 🤪

I used to watch him on Throwdown, and now I watch him on Beat Bobby Flay, Bobby’s Triple Threat and BBQ Brawl. He’s still an asshole, but he’s an asshole who can cook 😜

I made Bobby Flay’s Creamed Green Chili Rice with Crispy Baked Chicken Thighs. It turned out amazing even though I had to consult my friend who cooks all the time 😅

Update: I got the stamp of approval from Pammie, Dennis, and my sister’s brother-in-law, Paul, who dropped by for dinner. They finished the rice! I’m finally redeemed from when Pammie and her husband said my adobo was too salty two years ago. Their hurtful comments still keep me up at night 😅

Pammie is back from Hawaii, and she brought me back my favorite s’mores cookie from The Cookie Corner 🍪

Let it be known that I’m officially on the prowl for a man named ‘Joey’ 😏

Leftover Chinese food? Put an egg on it.

Yes, I ate it with Datu Puti Spiced Vinegar, and yes, I’m Filipino as fuck.

I’m handy as fuck!

My dad isn’t handy at all, so I’ve always built my own furniture and put shit together myself.

One time, I got this Article Caliper Shelf delivered to my apartment in LA. It was huge! I had to piece it out in the lobby, because the box wouldn’t fit in the elevator and I live on the third floor. Several of my neighbors offered to help, but I declined them all. As much as I would’ve loved the assistance, I hate being mansplained even more 😅 Plus, I wanted them to just think of me as ‘the nice, quiet girl in 332’ and I’ve seen putting furniture together test too many relationships!

It was worth it in the end, though. It’s one of my favorite pieces in my studio.

Pammie got a stand-up desk while I was in Spain, so I couldn’t put it together for her. She said it took her five days. When Shi found out, she was like, “Dennis didn’t help you?!” Apparently, it’s Shi’s husband’s job to do that kind of shit. But my sister’s husband is even less handy than she is, if you can believe it. Even though I don’t need a man to build furniture for me, I can’t imagine being married to someone who isn’t good with their hands 😏

All that to say, my sister ordered new mattresses and they’ve been sitting in her living room for weeks. They’re those adjustable ones where each side can sit up or lie down, so she also bought new bed frames that are adjustable. She has to break down her old bed frame and mattress and remove it, so she can put the new bed in her room. They were gonna get rid of their old mattress, but decided to keep it and put it in the guest bedroom where I sleep. I currently sleep on the full bed that came with the house (my sister got the model home). My feet hang over the end of the bed and I can literally feel every spring in the mattress 🥴 My sister’s old bed is memory foam and king-sized, so all my sleep-related problems would be solved 😅

Pammie hired the community handyman to break down her old bed and set up her new one, but he got sick the day he was supposed to come, then she came back from Vegas with Covid when he was rescheduled to come, and now she and her husband are vacationing in Hawaii.

Partly because I wanted to do something nice for my sister, but mostly because I’m tired of sleeping on this god awful bed, I broke down her old bed frame, set it back up in the guest room, and set up her new bed up in her room.

This memory foam cali king is nice, but I miss sleeping in my own bed. I have a nice pillow top dream cloud mattress at home, and a bed frame the delivery guys from CB2 assembled in less than 10 minutes.

I also set up Pammie’s Ring Video Doorbell that’s been collecting dust in her closet for 2 years. I’m only the best sister there ever was 😌

I wanted it to be a surprise when she came back from Hawaii, but I didn’t know where she kept the Ring or where the tools were to disassemble the bed. I was like, ‘Do you know where the 3/16-inch short arm hex key is? Also, what is a short arm hex key?’ 😆

I’m babka tired now, though… The first and only time I made babka, it turned out sooo good. But I didn’t realize how time consuming it was going to be (the dough has to rest and rise twice!), so I didn’t start till 11 at night. I was up at 3 in the morning tired as fuck and near tears (just kidding—I was openly sobbing). So whenever I’m exhausted now, I just say I’m ‘babka’ tired and Pammie knows I’m not fucking around 😴

Anyway, I just doordashed a pizza, so I’m gonna eat it and sleep for a gabillion years ✌🏻

A good way to insult me is to say I look darker LOL, and I have never once been mistaken for a local in Hawaii. I’m too fair-skinned and much too loud 😅 (my Cali vernacular screams tourist vibes).

Also, I should clarify that I only got drunk in Christine’s pool because she and her husband were there watching the kids. I don’t drink when I’m watching children (mostly because people never leave their kids with me).

Actual footage of me babysitting:

I’ve dated and been with guys during this timeline, but no one I’d call my boyfriend and def no one I’d marry, have kids with or divorce 😅

Oh, well. I’m just here for the drama 😜

Ever since I repotted our coin plant, most of the leaves have fallen out and it has been slowly dying. My sister texted me this photo of this luscious coin plant at her hotel in Hawaii, and it’s a full moon tonight, so I’m charging my crystals on the rooftop and put the coin plant next to it so it can receive its energy LOL.

Full moon, do your thing ✨

Update:

Cinnamon rolls, furikake chex mix, and chocolate chip cookies, oh my 💛

It would’ve been my grandma’s 93rd birthday this weekend, so we had a potluck at the cemetery. She would’ve loved these treats I brought. She was diabetic and always sneaking sweets 😆

From the last birthday we celebrated in 2020 with grandma 💛

What, your family doesn’t celebrate dead people’s birthdays with food at the graveyard? 😜

My favorite video ever 🥹

Happy heavenly birthday, Queen! 🥳

Dear Shirley May,

Today I walked to Mcdonald’s to get my steps in and say hi to all my dog friends, made cookies for my grandma’s party tomorrow, drove by myself (for the first time since the stroke and didn’t kill anybody!) to Christine’s club pool, and went swimming with her, Francis and the kids. They brought beer and seltzers, and I was way too drunk to drive home, so Christine drove my car home while Francis followed, all the while Dylan was screaming in the backseat, ‘Thank you for the cookies, Auntie Mayan!!!’

So… a typical pre-stroke Saturday 😜

You have a secret lover for five years and no one ever lets you forget it 😅

My dog friends:

My sister and her husband are vacationing in Hawaii for the week. Partly because I didn’t want to schlep all my work shit to my parents’ house (I have to bring my gigantic work-issued desktop, because IT won’t let us access the server from our personal laptops anymore), but mostly because I’m a grown ass woman who doesn’t need supervision, I’m staying at my sister’s house by myself.

No secret lovers here! But I will be walking around in my chonies 😜

I was looking for stuff for my Halloween costume, and I saw these earrings on Etsy. One of the highlights was ‘Vintage from the 1980s’ 😲

The 1980s are vintage?! Am I old? (Don’t answer that).

People think I’m hilarious, IDK why I’m single ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When I was trying to eat ‘healthy’ before, I’d order a wrap from Chick-Fil-A, but still get a side of waffle fries and wash it down with a large sweet tea 😅 Nowadays, I don’t drink drinks with calories (unless it’s alcohol or iced coffee, so no soda or juice).

Chick-Fil-A sells their Avocado Lime Dressing in stores, so I made the wrap at home in a Carb Balance Tortilla and it was sooo good 👌🏻

Two natural disasters in one day? I’m ready ✌🏻

We watched It Ends With Us at the theater, and I didn’t read the book or watch the trailer beforehand, but Justin Baldoni directed and starred in it, and I’ll watch anything he’s in. If you don’t know who Justin Baldoni is, he was Raf in Jane the Virgin and the love of my life.

I’m just gonna leave this here 😍

This movie def made me cry, but Christine was crying throughout the entire movie, even the parts that weren’t sad LOL. She was already crying before the movie started when they showed the trailer for We Live In Time. To be fair, I also cried during that trailer.

Christine loves Justin Baldoni, too, so I asked if she’s seen Five Feet Apart, another movie Justin directed but did not star in, and I sobbed through in 2019. She found it streaming on Prime, watched it alone at home, and has been crying all day 😅

Brunch with the besties (@ La Sabrosita)

When Jessie suggested this restaurant, we thought it was at the mall across the street. I’ve been practicing driving, so Pammie had me drive to the mall, but it was closer than we thought. We could’ve walked there 😆

I should’ve walked because I ordered a mimosa flight thinking I would share it with the table, but Jessie and Pammie had cafe de olla and Christine drank all day yesterday and is done for the weekend (or possibly forever), so I had to polish off the mimosa flight by myself 😅

This StepBet challenge is finally over. In 6 weeks, I’ve walked 162 miles and won $11.56 😆 The number of steps I had to do increased by 2% every week, which I didn’t think was a lot when I signed up, but man, am I bad at math 😅 2% of thousands of steps is a lot!

When I was walking back from Vons last week, someone kept honking at me as I crossed the intersection. It was my right of way (I always use the crosswalk because people always blow through stop lights here—I’ve almost gotten hit!), so it wasn’t because I was crossing when I wasn’t supposed to. A ton of people I know live in this area (including an ex), but I feel like they would’ve texted me after if it was someone I knew. I wasn’t wearing anything cute (just my Michael Myers shirt, black leggings, and a Padres hat), so it wasn’t a catcall (and if it was, I don’t respond to such advances LOL). I just turned up my Deftones playlist in my earbuds and sipped on my Starbucks iced green tea and went on my way. So if you see me walking around and think I’m ignoring you, I am 😜

Poutine, but make it breakfast ✌🏻

Shi read that I was in a mood on my blog, so she offered to come down and walk around the neighborhood with me this morning! She never fails to lift my spirits 💛

I haven’t seen Shi in a couple months. We were all supposed to go to lunch when I came back from Spain, but I got Covid. We rescheduled to last weekend, but Pammie had Covid 😷 This was long overdue!

Of course she drove down at an ungodly hour while her kids were still sleeping so I was up earlier than I wake up for work 😅

Me: What in the death metal band is this shirt?
Shi: They’re Klingons 🖖🏻

Sometimes I forget how much of a Trekkie this b is 🤣 She got this shirt at a Star Trek pop-up at Comic-Con one year.

I can’t wake up this early on a Saturday and get my steps in without rewarding myself with an iced Mexican mocha (@ Casa de Otay)

Hello
I’ve waited here for you
Everlong

The last time I saw the Foo Fighters was a couple years ago at Innings Fest just a month before their drummer died. Jessie asked me if I wanted her extra tickets, but I’ve been in a mood. If I would’ve known she had a suite, I would’ve snapped out of my mood real quick 😜

Jack Karlson has died, and we’re having a succulent Chinese meal from Mandarin Beijing in his honor 😆

As it turns out, nobody wants holiday cookies in the middle of summer, so I made some regular chocolate chip cookies 😅 I followed this recipe and I can’t stop eating them. The sea salt and chocolate combo is *chef’s kiss* 🍪

Spaghetti squash casserole to counteract all the sugar and carbs I’ve been eating lately. Is that how it works?

It’s not the season for cranberry bliss, but it’s ant season, so Pammie made me clean out the cupboards because those little fuckers were getting into everything. I had all the accoutrements for the cranberry bliss cookies I never made last Christmas, and the craisins expire next month, so I made some holiday cookies in the height of summer 🎄☀️

It’s already August, which means it’s spooky season, but it’s also PSL season. Basic white girls love the pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks, but I’m just a basic Asian girl, so I’m more excited for the return of their pumpkin cream cheese muffins. I found a copycat recipe, and they turned out sooo good.

Next up, Starbucks’ Apple Croissant!

On power days, we eat chili cheese tots ✌🏼

I woke up late this morning and missed the cutoff for McDonald’s breakfast (I still walked over there to get my steps in and get iced coffee since it’s available all day), my sister came back from Vegas and tested positive for covid, my sunflower sprout died while I was away this weekend, and I just found a big ass bug in my room. I think it’s a cricket, but IDK how it got in here since I’m on the third floor, there’s no food in here, no trash, and my windows have been closed for weeks because my sister keeps the A/C at a cool 68°.

Mondays, amirite? 😅

Update:  I tried to do the humane thing and trapped the bug in a jar and let him outside, but he 127 hour‘d himself in the jar and is now hopping around outside with one leg.

I’m scared he’s gonna somehow find his way back into my air-conditioned room and jump on me while I’m sleeping.

I went to a party yesterday, and spent most of my time with this sweet boy. He’s 14-years-old, scared of stairs because he slipped and fell down some last year, and somebody spilled spaghetti on his fur at the party 🤣

Whenever I see someone my age with facial piercings, I’m like, ‘Is that what I look like?’ 😳

When I was younger, I thought I’d love things forever (as evident by the glow-in-the-dark stars still on the ceiling of my old bedroom at my parents’ house that I stuck up there with permanent adhesive). I used to have my tongue pierced, but only took my tongue ring out after I had my lip pierced in my early 20s. I was in the Mcdonald’s drive-thru during covid, and I briefly pulled down my mask, and the guy taking my order made eyes at me and was all, ‘I really like your lip ring.’ I pinned him with a look and was like, ‘This piercing is older than you, kid.’ 👵🏻 In unrelated news, I’m still single. I seem to only get hit on by seedy tow truck drivers and kids who work at Mcdonald’s and were born after I graduated high school 😅

I would take the lip ring out, but I don’t think the hole will close. I got my ears pierced when I was a baby, and I hardly ever wear earrings, yet the holes are still there. I’d like to have a plastic surgeon remove the scar tissue and sew the lip ring hole up. It shouldn’t be too hard to find a good plastic surgeon in LA 😜

(via @francisandmaggie)

My favorite instagram cat died and I am unwell 😿

Chel sent me this post earlier this morning and then I sent her the same post when I saw it closer to the afternoon. I never got a notification that she sent me the same post because I have my ‘do not disturb’ on at such an unholy hour 😅

I waited
And waited
Man, am I the greatest
God, I hate it
All my love and patience
Unappreciated

My sister and her husband are in Vegas right now, and I stayed behind in SD, partly because I wasn’t invited LOL, partly because they’re there celebrating my ex’s ex-girlfriend’s birthday (she’s married to my sister’s husband’s childhood friend now), but mostly because it’s hot enough to melt crayons over there 😅

I walked my ass to Mcdonald’s and got my steps in, got free fries, and the Padres won??? Win-win.

And we could live so happily
If no one knows that you’re with me
I’m just kidding, but really, really, really
Please, please, please don’t prove I’m right

I hate that I like this song.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun is one of my favorite 80s movies (only behind Beetlejuice). No wonder I like this song so much!

Jessie’s looking for a nanny and they must be flat-chested, unattractive, located in San Diego, and good with dogs (in that order) 😆

Also, they filmed You down the street from my apartment in LA. I stopped watching after the second season because it was getting too far-fetched and crazy. I’d rather watch true crime 😆

Sundays are for swimming and seltzers ✌🏻

This sprout be sprouting 🌱

I woke up and broke my glasses (I always fall asleep with my glasses on, and the metal hinge finally snapped this morning), so I ordered another of the same pair, but it takes a couple weeks to make. I walked to Vons in this hot ass weather to get my steps in and decided to reward myself with a venti iced unsweetened green tea, but the Starbucks inside Vons was out of green tea. We were supposed to celebrate Christine’s husband’s birthday tonight downtown at Basic, but Pammie’s been seeing a chiro and doing PT and she threw out her back, so instead I’m in bed watching old Bones reruns, wearing my prescription sunglasses at night like an asshole, and migrating my old work Mac to the new Mac they sent me. Another wild Saturday night in!

It’s also a full moon tonight. Do with that information what you will 😜

Update: Biden has dropped out of the presidential race and Tender Greens filed for bankruptcy 😬

💔

(via @theintrovertedattorney)

I’m Team Apple (I have a work-issued Mac Studio Desktop, a personal Macbook Pro laptop, an iPhone, iPad, and Apple Watch), but I’ve never been more envious of PC users before today 😅

starsailor – Some of Us

My wandering soul
Found solace at last
I wanted to know
How long it would last

Blue Merle – Every Ship Must Sail Away

Oh, change is in the air
And you wear it oh so well
I asked you if you cared
If you care, I couldn’t tell

José González – Heartbeats

One night of magic rush
The start a simple touch
One night to push and scream
And then relief

Novo Amor – Faux

Shown
You swoon in your lace run
Brooding, a quilt tongue
Pining me

When I don’t have Food Network or ID on while I work, I’ve been watching old Bones episodes because they’re always showing it on BBC America and WeTV for some reason. They also have a channel called ‘ALF‘ that only shows old episodes of Alf 24/7 LOL. I used to watch Bones when it was on nearly two decades ago. I forgot how much I loved all the sad music 🖤

My favorite breakfast burrito in SD is from this place by my old apartment in La Mesa called Super Oscar’s. I recently found out they closed down and turned into a Better Buzz Coffee, which I’m not mad about, because I love that place. I’ll take SD Mexican food over LA Mexican food any day. My favorite place by me in Redondo to get a breakfast burrito is Phanny’s. When I asked for hot sauce, though, they gave me a dang Tapatio packet. -1 star for their lack of homemade hot sauce, but 4/5 stars for this view, though 😍

Anyway, I recreated my favorite breakfast burrito from Super Oscar’s with tater tots, eggs, ham, cheddar, and turkey bacon, all wrapped in a carb balance tortilla. What has become of my life?

Welp, there goes my evening plans! LOL JK.

My sister finally picked up the key to their community pool. You would think a sign like this wouldn’t be necessary, but despite all the dog parks, ‘clean up after your dog’ signs, free dog waste stations, and trash bins on every corner, people still let their dogs shit all around this neighborhood.

Pammie used to take a trash grabber and trash bag with us on our walks, and fill it up in one go. I was like, ‘You should bring three bags: one for trash, one for recyclables, and one for compost.’ She was like, ‘I’m not trying to fix all the world’s problems.’ 🤣

More recently, we were on another walk, and I could hear this kid having a tantrum behind us. I turned around to give him a death glare LOL and saw a whole ass family (parents and three kids) in swimwear. We were walking back from the grocery store, so we had to drop off the groceries at the house before continuing our walk. While walking past the community pool, we saw the same family outside the gate, and the dad was trying to reach over the gate and open the door without a key, but he couldn’t do it. The kid who was throwing a tantrum earlier starts crying again because he can’t go swimming. Pammie nods at my lanyard of keys and was like, ‘You have the pool key. Want to let them in?’ I was like, ‘Not on my watch!’ 😅

My sister pays a ridiculous monthly HOA fee (half my rent!), and access to the community pool is an included privilege. I also take pictures of cars illegally parked in red zones and houses with decorations still up well after the holiday. ‘What are you gonna do with those?’ she and her husband asks. ‘Keep them on my phone in case I need a reason to report them to the HOA.’ ‘You don’t even live here!’ 🤣

One of my absolute favorite breakfast sandwiches is the Farmhouse Egg Sandwich from Einstein Bros. Bagels, only second to the Bacon, Eggs -n- Cheese at Eggslut. I’m p serious about breakfast, I even bought a Bacon, Eggs -n- Cheese shirt in Bone Thugs -n- Harmony Old English the last time I ate there:

I only have it when I’m flying out of Terminal 1 at SD Airport, or when I pay the additional expanded range fee to have it doordashed to my sister’s house. I looked up the ingredients, and thought, ‘I could make that.’

Einstein’s sells some of their shmears in tubs, but not the kind that goes on this particular sando (country pepper). I sub’d Whipped Garlic & Herb Philadelphia Cream Cheese. I also used uncured turkey bacon instead of real bacon because that’s what I had on hand. I always get my Farmhouse on a jalapeño cheddar bagel instead of the default cheesy hash brown bagel, because I like a little spice in my life.

It turned out amazing, and I will def be making it again!

There was an assassination attempt on Trump over the weekend, and I thought, ‘How is this only the first time someone tried to kill him?’ I also thought of this quote from The Wire:

How did that kid shoot him and miss? Lee Harvey Oswald was able to assassinate JFK while he was in a moving car.

Also, in unrelated news, I saw this shirt at the mall:

IYKYK 😆

I just completed my first StepBet challenge.

(306 total players – 264 eligible players) x ($10 buy-in) = $420. $420/264 eligible players = $1.59 LOL

I may have won less than $2, but the health benefits are priceless 😆

StepBet allows you to participate in 3 challenges at a time, so I’m doing 2 other challenges that are a bit longer (6 weeks) and the pots are much higher ($94,000 total). Hopefully, I’ll win more than $2 😜

I always get sparklers for my holiday gift bags from TOPS Malibu, and I always buy a ridiculous amount because I refuse to pay extra for shipping LOL. They always send a free surprise gift with their orders, and this last order came with a small pouch of sunflower seeds.

They remind me of the gorgeous sunflower fields I saw in the countryside in Spain:

I planted one of the sunflower seeds and this little sprout grew 🌱 It’s supposed to mature in 3-4 months! 😆🌻

I want you to stay
‘Til I’m in the grave
‘Til I rot away, dead and buried
‘Til I’m in the casket you carry

Obsessed with this song.

I once went to a Billie Eilish show in 2018 when she was only 16 before all the Grammy awards. 16-year-old artists have 16-year-old fans, though, and my ears are still ringing 6 years later from all her young fans screaming. I vowed to never see her live again, but I like to listen to this song while I’m getting my steps in (if I’m not listening to my twerkout playlist).

Mega Simone – Hit Me Where The Heart Is

I’ll be who you want to
Baby please make me feel
Hit me where the heart is, let me know
What the best part is, I should grow

💔

I once ordered ‘carne asada chips’ at the taco shop near my apartment in LA, and the cashier was like, ‘You mean, steak nachos?’ What in the gringo ass taco shop?

Another time at the same taco shop, I had called in my order for pick up. I went there and there was no parking. I waited 5 minutes for a space, and this guy swoops in and takes my spot. I was so hangry, I parked behind him and blocked his ass in and stormed inside. We were stuck in line together, and he apologized for taking my spot. I said I was just picking up an order and leaving, so he’d be able to leave later. I took my food, walked back to my car and released the breath I didn’t know I was holding in. People have been murdered for less in LA! Let alone carne asada chips 😅

Sometimes I have to remind myself, ‘You’re in your forties now. You need to calm the fuck down.’ After that incident, I started doordashing my carne asada chips, and now I’m making them at home! 😆

I’ll just be here from 9-10pm on Mondays for the next 2 months ✌🏼

Update: Logan Sandoval (winner of Barbecue Showdown, owner of ZEF BBQ in LA, and love of my life) is a contestant on this new season of BBQ Brawl, and my ass is wide awake now!

I’ll be at Petco Park at the Harry Potter Padres Theme Game that day, but I’ll be wearing my ‘Let Joey Eat’ shirt seeing how many bacon-wrapped hot dogs I can eat from Randy Jones Grill (is it still a contest if you’re the only one participating?) ✊🏻🌭

Leftover 4th of July sangria in a skeleton cup because Summerween.

Coincidentally, this is also how I prep for a BJ 🤣

I was watching DDD earlier and they featured Mrs. Potato. I had a sudden craving for chili cheese fries, which I used to doordash all the time in LA. ‘Where do they make good chili cheese fries down here?’ I asked Pammie, and she was like, ‘IDK… Wienerschnitzel?’ LOL. I’m not a food snob (JK, I totally am). I just instacarted all the accoutrements, and made it my damn self! (I also had a Power Day and did over 10K steps today. Get off me.)

Patrick Bertoletti won the mustard belt, but only because Joey Chestnut was banned from competing in Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest this year.

I stand behind Joey 😆

Views and ‘cue ✌🏻

You can’t spell ‘sausage’ without ‘USA’ 🇺🇸

FYI I prefer white wine if I’m drinking it by itself, but I’ll drink red or white if it’s in sangria. Also, I’m strictly dickly 😅

Strawberry Lemonade White Sangria (from thegirlinspired)

• 2 – 750 ml bottles of sauvignon blanc
• 1 liter club soda
• 6 ounces frozen pink lemonade concentrate (½ can)
• ½ cup simple syrup (1:1 ratio sugar/water)
• 1 lemon washed and sliced for garnish
• 2 cups fresh strawberries sliced
• 1 pint fresh raspberries gently rinsed

My Spiritual AF card of the day says, ‘Revenge is wack and petty and gives you wrinkles.’  Well, Asian don’t raisin, and my nightly skincare routine keeps me young, so I may be wack and petty, but at least I have no wrinkles 😜

You a bad girl and your friends bad too
We got the swag sauce, she drippin’ swagu

I saw Beyoncé perform this song at Dodger Stadium and lasers came out of her eyes. It was almost as cool as what’s in these swag bags! 😜

• TOPS Malibu Single Wish Sparkler
• Lost Farm Strawberry Chews
• Chuao Chocolatier Firecracker Dark Chocolate Mini Bar
• Dove Promises Dark Chocolate
• Dove Promises Milk Chocolate
• Sugarfina Sugar Lips
• Haribo Goldbears Minis
• Charms Blow Pops
• Ring Pops
• Airheads Xtremes Belts
• Sour Patch Kids
• Mike and Ike
• Pelon Pelo Rico
• Dulces Vero Pica Fresa
• Furikake Chex Mix

Happy 4th! 🇺🇸

I was at the post office earlier this week mailing 4th of July goodie packages to a couple of my friends who don’t live in SD, and I mused to myself, ‘What’s the next holiday?’ Pammie’s like, ‘Labor Day. Remember we have that Harry Potter Padres Theme Game that night?’ ‘I meant the next holiday I make gift bags for. Ooh, Halloween!’

Just 3 more months, y’all 😈💀🎃🕷

My doc appointment with the hematologist last week went well. I don’t have cancer 😮‍💨 He said that the normal range for white blood cells is 4.5K–11K and mine has been consistently 12K the past year, but everything else was normal, so he’s not concerned. He said it looks like there were some abnormalities in my T-cells, but that would only concern him if my other numbers were low and they weren’t, so he just wants to see me in 6 months to make sure my numbers are the same.

He was like, ‘Any questions for me?’ and my mom was like ‘How old are you?’ LOL he looked hella young. He was Asian and maybe in his 20s or 30s. He also said his babyface can be attributed to his skincare routine 😆

He was asking me a bunch of health questions and then he was like, ‘So what do you like to do in your free time?’ and I was like, ‘Uhh go to concerts,’ and my mom was like, ‘She just saw Justin Timberlake. Twice!’ and he was like, ‘Before his DUI or after???’ Don’t judge me 😑

The only bad news I got that day was when I stepped on the scale in the doctor’s office, and found out I gained a few. I’m still skinnier than I was when I had the stroke, but I’m straying further away from my ‘DMV weight‘ LOL, and I’m sure my primary care physician will have words about it when I see her in a few months.

My friend knows how competitive I am, so she suggested I try this StepBet app. I joined this mini 2-week challenge to start out. The buy-in was only $10, and if you complete the challenge, you split the pot. Over 300 people have joined this challenge, so the pot is $3,000+. Nothing motivates me more than winning, so I might as well make some money while reaping the health benefits 😜

In my day (LOL), ‘rawdogging’ meant something completely different and way nastier 😅 Fucking Gen Z and their jargon. I don’t even ‘rawdog’ on a 45-minute flight to Vegas. In fact, we take bets on whether or not we’ll even get refreshments on such a short flight. Sometimes the flight attendants claim ‘turbulence’ and say they need to remain seated for the duration of our flight and can’t do beverage service. I always get an iced coffee and bottled water after TSA, no matter how short the flight is, because this bitch is always thirsty 😅

Pammie had to go to OC for work yesterday, and there was a horrific accident on the 5, so she stopped at a cafe to wait out the traffic and enjoy a matcha green tea latte. She’s just like my dad. They would rather wait out the traffic somewhere, but I prefer to just sit in the traffic and get to my destination faster. As long as I have Spotify and a bluetooth connection, I can sit in traffic for hours. It’s usually a 2-hour drive between LA and SD, but it can take upwards of 4 hours on holiday weekends 😵‍💫 

Today, on the drive back from my doctor’s appointment in LA, we hit traffic coming back, so my dad wanted to wait it out and eat dinner somewhere. We got back on the road around 6:45pm (usually non-traffic time in SD), but it was a parking lot on the 8. An ambo, police cars and two firetrucks zoomed past us on the shoulder. ‘Maybe someone’s dead up there,’ I mused to myself, and my mom was like, ‘Marion! Why are you always so morbid?!’ When we were finally able to creep past the accident, we saw an unconscious man on the ground getting CPR from the EMTs, his mangled motorcycle just ahead of him down the road. Yikes.

Actual footage of me driving in LA traffic:

Anyway, if my sister didn’t stop in that cafe to wait out traffic, she wouldn’t have heard this song they were playing inside and sent it to me because she knew it was my steez:

If I could be by your side
I’ll give you all my life, my seasons
I can’t be your love
‘Cause I’m afraid I’ll ruin your life

I knew they were Korean! They remind me of this other alternative Korean band I stumbled upon while looking for strawberry moon vibes on Spotify – The Poles 😅

The Poles never tour the US, though, and I saw that wave to earth is doing a North American tour and coming to SD, OC and LA. Their whole tour is sold out, though! WTF? Am I a Korean fangirl now? 🫰🏻

I need this shirt, except not in crop top form. Although I hate to deny the world the sight of my muffin top, I believe that people from the 1900s (or people who are old enough to have died of dysentery in Oregon Trail) shouldn’t be wearing crop tops. Fight me.

Also, in unrelated news:

Talking to Pammie about current events is like trying to find meaning in a Pauly Shore movie 😅

My sister has been in Solana Beach for work all week, so my parents are taking me to my doctor’s appointment in LA tomorrow. I got my labs back, and it was negative for lymphoma and leukemia, but my white blood cell count was still elevated and they saw some ‘abnormalities’ whatever that means. Hopefully the hematologist will have more insight for me tomorrow. At least it’s not blood cancer! 😅

These girls remind me of this quote:

I have a growing queue of things I know will make you laugh, and I don’t know where to put them.

Like, I have so much chismé to tell you about Steffi P. and shit 😆

I was eating dinner, and my sister and her husband were watching House of the Dragon. I don’t watch it, so I was like, ‘Who’s that? Why’s everyone sad? What’s happening?’ and I was met with this look 😅

My toxic trait is that I talk and ask questions during TV shows/movies. I watched Game of Thrones when it first came out, but I stopped watching after they killed off Jason Momoa in the first season. I started watching it again from the 2nd season during the 7th season when I found out the 8th season was gonna be the final one. I was like, ‘How come no one talks about Rob Stark? He’s fine as hell!’ and Pammie was like, ‘Uhh…’ 😅 Spoiler alert: Rob Stark dies in season three.

Donna and her husband were vacationing on the coast, and she sent us a picture of the beach and was like, ‘David says this is where Dobby’s grave is!’ and I was like, ‘Dobby dies?!?!’ I’ve only watched the first four Harry Potter movies, so I didn’t know Dobby was murdered in the 7th movie. The last Harry Potter movie came out in 2011, so it’s my own damn fault for getting spoiled.

Me: Anyone else die in the movies?
Pammie: Sirius.
Me: What?! Wait, who’s Sirius again?
Pammie: Sirius Black. Harry Potter’s godfather.
Me: Ohhh. I confused him with Severus Snape.
Pammie: He dies, too.
Me: What?!

I’ve somehow avoided finding out the ending of Lost, even though the finale aired in 2010 😅

When your sister still goes to Barnes & Noble for their extensive Harry Potter collection, and you’re the one who ends up buying all this random shit.

Summertime, and the livin’s easy ✌🏻

When your favorite 8-year-old loves Harry Potter and axolotls 💕

I was in Spain for her birthday, but I’m seeing her mom for dinner tonight. Christine messaged yesterday saying she missed our cackles and wanted to hang. We hang out all the time, but it’s usually for a special occasion (birthdays, holidays, Justin Timberlake concerts, etc. LOL). The last time I remember her asking if we were free out of the blue was when she told us she was pregnant 😳 She has since had three kids and her tubes tied, so I don’t think we’re gonna have any special announcements tonight (at least not of that nature). I would say it’s to discuss JT’s DUI this morning, but she asked to hang out yesterday so 😜

Anyway, can’t wait for chismé and cackles tonight!

My pops and I have exactly 3 things in common: our love for The Beatles, our nose, and our love for a good rooftop (@ Mister A’s)

Unlike my sister, who, when we visited the Philippines, my dad’s sister told her, ‘You look exactly like your dad… from all angles.’ 🤣

Happy Father’s Day to all who celebrate!

I’m back at work doing web stuff after weeks of being on vacation, months of being on catalogs, and recovering after a bout with covid. I also have a new profile pic on Slack 😜

JK I’m in my Michael Myers shirt and chonies right now. I’ll wear something a little nicer on Sunday 😜

FYI, Joey Chestnut is my hero 😭🌭

I’ve never been so happy for a ‘negative’ test result. JK. That’s a lie 😅

I’m free to leave the house now, but I think I’ll just stay my ass at home and recharge my social battery, might have a menty b later, IDK ✌🏼

Whenever I see a short girl with a tall guy, I’m like, ‘Stay in your lane, girl. He can’t even see you.’ 😅 I’m not super tall (5’7″), but I’m taller than most girls I know. Shi has been trying to get me to expand my dating pool and go back to Asians, but I haven’t been with an Asian guy in 20 years, plus they’re usually on the shorter side. I don’t necessarily love wearing heels, but I like having the option 😜

I have never had the desire to go to Florida before today 🙆🏻‍♀️🔪 (@ Cocktails & Screams)

Get you a sister who drops off a bouquet of your favorite flowers (peonies) to brighten your day when you have covid (you should be writing this down).

Our fabulous tour manager (Nelson from Gate 1) surprised us with sparkling wine on our way to our last city. I forgot my Beats on the tour bus on the last day, and he had the bus bring it back the next day (classic Mayan—I’ve left them on a plane before and paid $40 for the airline to ship it back to me 6 miles to my apartment in LA, because I wasn’t gonna endure the hell that is LAX to pick them up for free). He’s from Barcelona, and has spent his entire life in Spain, except for one year he decided to try out London. He came back the next year because, ‘People are just so ugly in the UK. Do they not have dentists???’ I mean, where’s the lie? LOL ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’ve never been to Europe or done a land tour before, I usually like to be on my own time when I’m on vacation—visit the places I wanna go, eat where I wanna eat when I wanna eat—but I liked it more than I thought I would! Our tour guides in each city were funny and super charming (Pedro in Portugal, Elena in Seville, Andrés in Ronda/Málaga, Rocio in Granada, and José in Madrid), I got to see places I never would’ve gone to myself, we had transportation to each city, plus we got free time everyday to do/eat where we wanted to. The only downside was being stuck with these obnoxious people on the tours. It’s like being held hostage in a group text you can’t get out of 😅 IYKYK.

These bus tours tested relationships. You’re stuck with the same group of people for 10 days. This old ass couple was fighting in Italian the entire time. I only understood when the wife told her husband, ‘Worry about yourself. I’m not a baby!’ and ‘Leave me alone!’ because she said it in English LOL. Another couple, the wife was asking the husband ‘Why are you smiling like that, I’ve never seen that smile before’ and this other couple, a gypsy was talking to the husband trying to sell him rosemary branches and read his palm, and when he came back, the wife was like, ‘Do you still have your wallet? Did she put a curse on you?’ LOL same couple when we were in Gibraltar, the husband was like, ‘It’s technically England, but all the waitresses are Spanish and they cross the border to work every day.’ His wife was like, ‘How do you know that? Were you flirting with the waitress while I was in the bathroom?’ He was like, ‘Yeah, we’re friends on TikTok now.’ 😂 I’m over here like 😴 Whenever people are arguing in front of me, I get super uncomfortable and pretend I’m sleeping LOL 😆

This old lady on our tour got her hair braided at the beach in Costa del Sol.

Her husband even went ziplining while we were in Toledo! Retired life is wild 😅

Nobody was my age (they were either in their 20s with their parents or in their 60s or older). This lady asked me what my husband’s name was, and I was like, ‘He’s my dad, not my sugar daddy’ LOL. She was like, ‘Oh okay, I didn’t want to assume.’ 😆 Another lady asked me if I was in school, because she thought I was a teenager! I was like, “I’m 42, ma’am.” She was shocked! She had her daughters with her, and they were in their 20s. I was closer to her age than to her kids 😆 My dad thought her daughters were teenagers, too. I was like, ‘They’re drinking sangria. They’re at least in her 20s’ and he was like, ‘But you were drinking vodka in high school’ and I was like, ‘Not in public!’ 😆

This group of six obnoxious people (three couples) were on the entire trip with us. They were super loud (lots of eye rolls and other people on the tour shushing them), always had something to say/complain about, in their 80s, Italian and from NYC. They had me questioning if I’m ageist, racist, or just don’t like people from New York LOL.

I met three ladies who are married with children, but traveling alone because either their husbands hate traveling or their husbands have bad hips LOL. I would never travel alone. I do a lot of things by myself—go grocery shopping, eat dinner in my apartment, go to John Mayer concerts LOL—but I know I wouldn’t like traveling alone. It’s like watching a movie in a theater alone. I’ve only watched Fever Pitch and Made of Honor by myself in a movie theater, because no one wanted to watch these romcoms with me LOL. I want to be able to look over at another person and be like, “Are you seeing what I’m seeing?!” Like in that movie, Shall We Dance?, Susan Sarandon says, We need a witness to our lives…You’re saying ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness.’

Can I get a witness?

Our trip started in Lisboa, Portugal, and it was gorgeous. The weather was much like San Diego, so it was really nice. Felt like home.

My favorite food of the whole trip was actually in Portugal. We had arroz de marisco (it was a lot like seafood paella, but soupier) and grilled octopus (@ Luzmar, Cascais, Portugal)

I also ate a Portuguese egg tart every day. I’ve never eaten one back home, and now I never can, because they taste so damn good over here. My mom said they’re way better than the ones they have at Paris Baguette 😅

Did you know Portugal is the largest producer of cork in the world? I didn’t. I just picked up this bag in Cascais because I thought it was cute. The “I ❤️ España” keychain was a gift from our tour manager, Nelson 😆

My dad: Slow down, we get more drinks at the flamenco show after dinner.
Me: *washes down my meds with a 4th glass of sangria*

If sangria was on the menu (and it always was), I ordered it.

Spain is on Central European Time instead of its natural time zone, so the sun didn’t set until close to 10pm! The flamenco show started at 9:30pm and I was already so tired and five glasses of sangrias deep 😅 (@ Tablao Flamenco El Patio Sevillano, Sevilla, Spain)

This photo was taken from our hotel at 9:45pm! The days are so long here ☀️

Me: What do you feel like eating for dinner?
My mom: Chinese food.
Me: We’re in Spain.

I found a Chinese restaurant that was near to our hotel and actually pretty good considering China’s on the other side of the world! Plus, I’m easygoing and they had sangria (@ Ming 明, Sevilla, Spain)

My dad: Another sangria? Aren’t you hungover from last night?
Me: *sipping my sangria* Nah, I’ve been training for this my whole life.

Churros con chocolate for breakfast? Sí, por favor (@ Meliã Lebreros, Sevilla, Spain)

Driving from Seville to Costa del Sol, we passed by this beautiful countryside full of sunflowers. They farm the sunflowers for its oil and energy. BRB gonna quit my job and move to the south of Spain to work on a sunflower farm ✌🏼 Or at Google in Málaga (we saw a corporate office there). Plus, Spain has 17 bank holidays a year!

My sister’s old company has a location in Madrid, so I told her she could work there while I work on a sunflower farm 😏 (@ Ernst & Young, Madrid, Spain)

It’s gorgeous here. Our tour guide in Ronda and Málaga, Andrés, said that the south of Spain is so easygoing. People die of heart attacks and diabetes from all the good food, but they don’t die of stress. And he said if we see someone running (exercising), they aren’t from Spain LOL. Sounds like my kind of country!

As I was toasting my second piece of bread during breakfast, I looked out the window and saw this tourist doing zumba outside. As a rule, I don’t exercise while I’m on vacation. I hardly exercise when I’m not on vacation 😅 I damn sure am not gonna exercise when I’m in Spain!

We stopped by this little town in the south of Spain with no traffic lights called Ronda. We visited one of the most famous bullfighting arenas in Spain. I thought bullfighting was bulls fighting other bulls, but it’s a man fighting a bull! And one of them dies at the end (usually the bull). They still do bullfighting once a year in this arena, but it’s banned in other parts of Spain (like Barcelona). I would never 😅

Nelson (who’s from Barcelona) isn’t into bullfighting either, and wanted us to leave that place with a happy memory, so he surprised us by taking us to this nearby horse farm, where the horses are loved and taken care of their whole lives (@ Reservatauro Ronda)

Pablo Picasso was born in Málaga, and his family built a museum there (@ Museo Picasso, Málaga, Spain)

I had to buy some souvenirs from the gift shop. The left is of his famous painting of prostitutes in Barcelona, Les Demoiselles d’Avignon. It’s part of the permanent collection at MOMA in NYC, so I didn’t get to see it in person. The original painting of the one on the right is featured in this museum, though, and it’s of Françoise Gilot. Picasso married twice and she was one his many mistresses. She was the only woman to ever leave him ✌🏼 She said, ‘Pablo was the greatest love of my life, but you had to take steps to protect yourself. I did, I left before I was destroyed.’ She was an artist in her own right, and also my hero. She just died last year at the age of 101.

As I was exiting the museum, this guy mistook me for a local and asked me for directions. I’m wondering if he understood my broken Spanish or if he’s still wandering the streets of Málaga 😅

Fun history fact: Gibraltar was taken from Spain by the British in the early 1700s, so it’s technically in England. We needed our passports to get in and out. From the coast, you can see Spain and Africa, but it was cloudy today, so we couldn’t see Morocco.

When in England (@ Roy’s Fish and Chips, Gibraltar)

I low key wanted to eat here, though (@ Taco Bell, Gibraltar)

The Barbary macaques roam free in Gibraltar, and you can find them living their best lives and stealing ice cream bars from all the tourists.

These caves were wild and reminded me so much of Antelope Canyon in Arizona (@ Saint Michael’s Cave, Gibraltar)

💯 (@ Ramsons Watergardens, Gibraltar)

We toured this palace, and it was so beautiful and smelled so good because of all the rose gardens and jasmine (@ Alhambra, Granada, Spain)

There were these ceramic bowls placed all around the palace, and I thought it was to feed water to the dogs (it was hot as balls this day), but the tour guide told us they were just beautiful trash cans 😆

Waiting for Wyclef Gene to appear (@ Restaurante Arrayanes)

BRB, looking for Cristiano Ronaldo ⚽ (@ Santiago Bernabéu Stadium, Madrid, Spain)

Real Madrid played Dortmund in the final while we were in Madrid. The actual game was at Wembley in London, but 90,000 people gathered at this stadium to watch it on the big screen. Real Madrid won the championship, so it was crazy in the city. The team had a big party at the stadium the next day, but it didn’t start till 10 o’clock. At night! On a Sunday! 👵🏻

No pictures were allowed inside the museum, but we got to see incredible works from Goya, Velázquez, Greco, Picasso, Rembrandt and more (@ Museo Nacional del Prado, Madrid, Spain)

I went to this other museum specifically to see works from Salvador Dalí, but was delighted to see some Picasso and Gris (@ Museo Nacional Centro de Arte Reina Sofía, Madrid, Spain)

My mom: I’m not really into art.
My dad: Who’s Salvador Dalí?

I can’t with these philistines 😅

It was impossible to get a photo of Picasso’s Guernica without a gaggle of tourists in front of it, but I picked up this postcard in the gift shop. I wanted one of Dalí’s most famous painting, The Persistence of Memory, but they didn’t have it because the original painting is also at MOMA in NYC. I will have to go to that museum the next time I’m in New York, so I can see more works from Dalí and Picasso.

I’ve only ever seen jamón ibérico on Food Network, and I finally got to try it at a Starbucks in Spain 😅

These prize pigs are fed acorns and live on free-range grass pastures in the Iberian peninsula. I guess it’s similar to Wagyu cattle in Japan, except jamón ibérico is harder to find in the US (it’s against the law to import jamón ibérico – the hind leg of an Iberian pig, hoof attached, swaddled in fat – because Spain does not have a single slaughterhouse that conforms to the regulations of the US Department of Agriculture).

I still regret not buying a jamón ibérico pillow from the souvenir shop across the street from our last hotel 😆

I kept seeing this Museo del Jamón everywhere. I thought it was a museum of ham, but it was just a bar/resto that specializes in ham 😆

There was also a La Casa de las Carcasas across from our hotel. I was disappointed that it didn’t mean ‘house of carcasses’ like I thought it did and didn’t see any dead bodies. I google translated ‘carcasas’ and it meant ‘casings’ in Spanish. I thought, ‘Oh maybe it’s sausages!’ so I was double disappointed when I saw it was just cell phone cases. I really gotta brush up on my Español. How embarazado. JK. ‘Embarazado’ means ‘pregnant’ in Spanish. I’ll never make that mistake again 😅

A guy I used to date when I was sixteen responded to my Museo del Jamón story on instagram, and this was our convo 😂 I’ve either gotten more morbid in the last 25 years, or I was better at hiding my freak flag when I was a teenager 🏴

It’s so hard to find iced coffee in Spain. One of our tour guides said people here like to buy a tiny cup of espresso and sit in front of it for hours. We were walking by a cafe, and he was like, ‘Remember these faces. They’ll still be sitting here when we walk back this way in a few hours.’ 😂 He said Starbucks hasn’t been super successful here because people don’t take their coffee to go. Luckily, they have these chilled coffees to go at the rest stops for all the tourists, complete with a straw you can pierce the lid with Capri Sun-style 😅

I ate a lot of seafood paella (or arroz de marisco). It takes like half an hour to prepare, because it’s made to order, but it’s so worth the wait.

Same Mayan, different country (@ Mcdonald’s, Granada, Spain)

Sometimes you don’t want anymore paella and just need to UberEats a McDouble to your hotel 😅

Spot the tourists (it’s my parents).

My dad was so worried we’d get pickpocketed, yet he was the one walking around with a big ass selfie stick, carrying multiple bags, and misplaced everything (our luggage locks, his glasses, his whole ass luggage—he left his luggage on the curb in front of the airport and didn’t realize it until we were checking our bags!). Like, should you be the one holding all our passports, my guy? 😅 I’m the one over here getting mistaken for a local LOL.

We spent an afternoon in Toledo before going to Madrid. It’s one of the oldest cities in Spain, but I can’t remember much else of what the tour guide told us. It was a lot of information. One of the ladies on our tour, Denise, was like, ‘Is there gonna be a test at the end???’ 😅

Yes, I took the metro in Spain (@ Plaza de España)

Yes, it was just like the metros in NYC and LA (crowded and smelled like piss).

There were heladarias on every corner. If I passed by an ice cream shop, I had to stop for a scoop (I don’t make the rules).

And I thought my outfit was fire (@ Plaza de la Armería, Madrid, Spain)

The only Filipinos I saw in Spain 😆

JK, we found a Filipino resto in Madrid complete with karaoke (@ Ka-Boodle Bar & Restaurant)

Actual footage of me trying to eat my tapsilog while another customer was singing horribly off-key. Why do tone-deaf people always want to do karaoke???

These orange trees grow all over Andalucía, or the southern coast of Spain. The fruit is bitter, though, and is mostly exported to make marmalade, so no one eats them off the tree.

I had to take video of this as proof that the parrots followed me to Spain 😅

Nori and I would always be sitting outside Starbucks on our lunch break at the beach, and the parrots would be in the palm trees yapping away!

On top of seeing a Skechers store in every major city, I saw so many tourists wearing them (including my parents). I can’t get away from this fucking place 😅

We stayed a few extra days in Madrid, so my dad booked a hotel for those days. It ended up being a hostel in the fucking ghetto. This is just like when he booked us at this shady ass hotel in Queens with a reggaeton night club at the bottom of it. My sister ended up booking us at the Hilton New York Times Square after that first night. We ended up moving to the Hotel Madrid Plaza España. It’s a Meliã hotel, and most of the hotels we stayed at on this tour were Meliã hotels, so I already knew it was nice. My dad is the kind of person who never checks reviews, and only booked this place because of its walkability to the city center.

I woke up with the worst headache that day. I hadn’t had a single headache since the strokes, and I used to get migraines all the time. I thought it was because I drank too much sangria the night before, or because I was on week 2 of vacationing with my parents 😅 but now I know it’s because I had covid. Needless to say, I was already so irritated this day. It was hard to get an uber because a lot of the city streets were blocked off since Real Madrid won the championship the night before and the city was celebrating. So we had already uber’d to the hostel, uber’d to another nice hotel that was booked and had no vacancies, and schlepped our luggage another few blocks to this Meliã hotel.

My sister (and KD, my favorite 8-year-old LOL) would have loved the in-flight movie selection.

I’m more of a New York Homicide girl myself. Spoiler alert: it was the brother.

All things considered, I will def be back here again! I loved everything—the people, the art, the culture. I took the rest of the week off because I need some ‘me’ time to wind down before I go back to work, so I’m just gonna rest and get rid of this virus. Or move to the south of Spain to work on a sunflower farm. I haven’t decided yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Welp, I finally got covid. Half our tour bus got sick towards the end of our trip. I took a test as soon as I got home last night, went to bed, and woke up 20 hours later 😅

Spain recap soon. Perhaps when this virus has left my body ✌🏼

Update: Supplemental paid sick leave for covid ended in California in 2022, so I guess I’ll be reporting those sick days in kronos 😅

Finally back on American soil (@ Portland International Airport)

I haven’t seen this iconic carpet since Deane, Sarah and I vacationed in Portland in 2017!

My parents like breaks while traveling, so we flew from Madrid to Frankfurt, Frankfurt to Portland, and are now waiting for our flight from Portland to SD. We’ve been traveling since 6 in the morning (which is really 9pm PST time the night before), and we don’t arrive till 9pm (PST) tonight. We have to go through customs every time we land, go through TSA again, had to pick up our luggage at baggage claim in Portland and re-check our bags. We flew business class, so we have access to the business lounge during our layovers, but I don’t care about free food and drinks in the lounge, or even the free meals on the plane. I’d rather sleep on a direct flight and not deal with any of that shit. Especially since I keep getting flagged for random security checks 😅

This old man in a wheel chair was wheeled to our waiting area in Madrid. He was yelling and cussing at the staff because there was no airport bar in our terminal where he was departing, and there was one in the terminal he arrived in. But since he has wheelchair assistance, they wheeled him over to our terminal. He kept screaming for them to take him back to the old terminal so he could go to the airport bar. I’m like, ‘Sir, it’s 4 in the fucking morning and too damn early to be yelling this loud and def too damn early to be drinking.’

I got stopped by TSA in Madrid also. They swabbed my bag but found nothing. I also got ‘randomly selected’ for a security check when I was boarding the plane in Frankfurt. I had to go to a private area where they searched my bag again and swabbed my clothes. Like, do I give off terrorist vibes? Or did they not like my Michael Myers shirt? 😅

I’m going, going, back, back to Cali, Cali

I follow Chino Moreno’s wife on IG (partly because Chino’s IG is private, but mostly because I’m a creep) and I saw he was in Hamburg, Germany. I had a layover in Frankfurt, but I google mapped it and Hamburg is 5 hours away 😅 I also have a layover in Portland and he lives in Oregon, but he’s touring in Germany. One day, the stars will align and I’ll meet him 😆

Also, I’m tired as fuck, because the first leg of my flight home from Madrid to Frankfurt was at 6am, so I had to get up at 2am 😴 which is really 7pm the night before pacific time. I just know I’m gonna be all kinds of fucked up when I get home. I was messed up for days after I flew home from Nashville and they’re only 2 hours ahead 😅

Portugal/Spain bound ✌🏼

I just want to eat some Portuguese egg tarts, watch some flamenco, eat paella, see some Picasso paintings in Málaga, eat some churros, see some Salvador Dalí art in Madrid, eat Ibérico ham, and somehow get into the Deftones’ sold-out show in Madrid.

Update 6/4/2024: I was able to do everything I wanted except see the Deftones. Their intimate show in Madrid was sold out, and they also performed at the Primavera Sound music festival in Barcelona, but I was nine hours away in Granada that day. Luckily, lots of people posted videos on instagram, plus Amazon streamed the music festival.

They sang so many of my favorites: Diamond Eyes, Sextape, Cherry Waves, Change (In the House of Flies), and the Smiths cover Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want. If they do a similar set at Dia De Los Deftones in SD this year, I will lose my mind 🖤

Keanu Reeves and his band, Dogstar, were also at Primavera Sound 😩

Full moon tonight ✨

I sent Alicia this Christmas card one year, then accidentally sent her the same card the next year:

I found a box of this same card on eBay, and I’ve been sending her this card every year for the past decade 😆

I was hoping to find out if I have cancer or not after my Spain trip 😅

I have a doctor’s appointment with a hematologist after I come back from vacation, and they called yesterday and said they wanted me to do some bloodwork a couple weeks before my appointment, because some of the test results take that long. So I got my labs done this morning since I leave tomorrow.

My favorite phlebotomist was there, and she complimented my mani 💅🏻 I get my blood drawn every few months, and she always remembers me. She asks who brought me to my appointment because she knows I don’t drive yet LOL, and she tells me about her kids. I hate needles, but she always makes me feel so comfortable.

Wish me luck ✨

The VIP experience (@ Kia Forum)

As Pammie, Christine and I were scarfing down our nachos, chicken tenders, burgers, and garlic fries before the show, I looked around and noticed no one else had food. I forgot people in LA don’t eat 😅

I think we broke Christine 😆

Her husband sent us a picture of her the next day wearing a JT shirt with a huge smile on her face and was like, ‘She’s been like this all morning!’ He told her being VIP at the JT show was like when he and I had floor seats at the Young the Giant show, and Christine was like, ‘IDK what metric system you’re using, but JT≠YTG.’ 🤣

Nail tech: Is this for a special occasion?
Me: I’m going on vacation.
Nail tech: Did you want a bright summer color? 💅🏻
Me: Do you have black gel?

I always get my nails painted black no matter what the season is, be it spring, summer or spooky 🖤

This is how I spend my Friday nights now 👵🏻🤣

I made Christine’s family banana bread, partly because I had some black ass bananas, but mostly to soften the blow of her going up to LA for the JT show with us this weekend while her husband stays at home with the kids 😅

I had enough nanners to make 3 loaves, so I made some for Pammie and my parents, too. It smells so good up in this bitch right now 🤤

No BBQ? No alcohol? No dogs? And where do I exit? 😅

I’ve only seen the bestie once since I had the stroke and have been in SD. She moved to Murrieta a few years ago, and it’s about as equally far from my place in LA as it is to SD. She invited me to her city’s birthday bash next month. Not sure what the celebration entails, since there won’t be any BBQ, alcohol or dogs LOL, but there will be fireworks at least. Plus, I would love to see Alicia and her fam, so hopefully I’ll be driving by this time, so I can make it!

My parents were so traumatized after teaching my sister to drive when she was 16, so when it was my turn to learn the next year, they hired a driving instructor 😅 Jessie offered to help me practice driving, though we’ll use my car instead of her new Lexus SUV, and she will probably leave her newborn baby at home (good call LOL). She also said Pammie can ride in the back, but the second she says something, she’s outta there! 🤣

After Chel sent me this photo of this stray cat she took in, I sent her a gabillion IG reels of cute cats. She was like, ‘Ok whyyy do you have so many cat videos at your disposal? 🤣’ I follow a lot of animals on instagram, and bookmark a lot of cat videos, and now I can finally share them with someone! Yes, I’ve already invited her to do kitten yoga.

My favorite cat on instagram is named Francis. He’s 13, but he still looks like a kitten because he has dwarfism 🥹 You’re welcome 😽

JT only reposts IG stories from verified accounts, so I need to either get verified or get pregnant before we go to his LA show this weekend 😅

I’m also not beneath getting a service dog 😆

Through some excessive light googling, I found the baby registry of a guy who ghosted me once 😳 It’s a blessing and a curse, the shit you can find out on the internet…

My sister and her husband are back in Vegas this week for her husband’s birthday, so I was packing to stay at my parents’ house. She was like, ‘Do you need that makeup on the desk?’ and I was like, ‘Nah, it’s for Halloween.’

I’m making my costume this year, inspired by this girl I saw at the Dia De Los Muertos Festival at Hollywood Forever Cemetery.

Only 170 days till Halloween! 😅 Is it too early to start buying shit for my costume???

Also, if anyone wants to be the James Bond to my catrina, I’m taking applications 😆

Christine’s kids got me the sweetest card and flowers for Mother’s Day 🥰 I may not be their mom, but I’m the fun aunt who makes them pizza cupcakes 😜

When I asked Jessie what she wanted for her first Mother’s Day, she was like, ‘A hotel room. Alone. Just me.’ 😅

Happy Mother’s Day to all who celebrate! Hopefully you got to do everything you wanted today (even if it was nothing at all!).

I watched the movie, Chef, on a train on my laptop with an audio splitter and a boy I don’t talk to anymore. All of my memories of this movie are tied to him, and now I have new memories.

They have a Chef food truck (inspired by Chef Roy Choi and Jon Favreau’s movie) inside Park MGM. We picked up breakfast here before heading to the airport to go home. It was *chef’s kiss*.

Justin Timberlake, we out here ✌🏼 (@ T-Mobile Arena)

We sat in the last row on the floor, so when he moved to the stage in the back, it was like we had front row seats 😍

When Lance Bass shows up at your concert 😏

Growing up, he was tied for my least favorite *NSYNC member (with Chris). Now, he’s one of my favorites! His instagram makes me LOL. My then boyfriend got me the *NSYNC dolls for Christmas one year, except he accidentally got a duplicate of one of the members, and no Lance. My set has been incomplete since we broke up in 2005 😅

JT sang all of the hits. If you’re like me, and like to google the setlist before the show, here you go.

He didn’t sing this song, but the DJ who opened for him played this one and all the *NSYNC jams. I felt like I was 18 again. My sore stems the next day from standing for his nearly 3-hour set reminded me that I’m not, in fact, 18 anymore 😅 I forgot all about this gem. The Legends of Summer show with JT/Jay-Z at the Rose Bowl was one for the books.

I can’t wait to see him again next weekend in LA 🤪

We ate at Roy Choi’s resto, Best Friend, inside Park MGM. It was sooo good. I’ve had Roy Choi’s short rib tacos before (he has a brick and mortar and food trucks in LA, plus he had a Kogi Taqueria inside the Whole Foods in El Segundo near my apartment).

If frosé’s on the menu, I’m ordering it.

The food was amazing, and Roy Choi himself even came out. He dapped my sister’s husband and said wassup to us because we obviously recognized him and I don’t think any of the other patrons did.

I had to get a Best Friends shirt, so I could rep him back in LA.

There’s an Eataly in LA, but this was my first time at this Vegas location. It was also inside the Park MGM. It’s like an Italian food hall. We had Tagliatelle alla Bolognese, Hot Honey Soppressata pizza and gelato. Everything was so good and fresh. Andiamo!