I’ll allow it 🤪

Does anyone else get unreasonably angry whenever they see a CyberTruck on the road, or are you normal? 😅

Tried to watch the Padres/Dodgers game, but it was blacked out in LA 😒

(via @toastthenarcoleptic)

So I doomscrolled instagram and found this narcoleptic dog named Toast, and now I has a sad 🥺

In unrelated news, I started my period today.

Every month when I’m on my period, I ask Nori to rub my tummy, and every month, she respectfully declines LOL.

I’ll just be in bed with my hot water bottle in case anyone wants to come over and be the big spoon.

When you bring your own crab scissors and vinegar to dip the crab in. Yes, that’s Datu Puti, yes, I’m Filipino as fuck, yes, I remade that logo in Illustrator and cricutted that sticker, and yes, I know I’m extra ✨ Next question 😜

We took my dad to his favorite seafood buffet for Father’s Day. Since my sister’s been on a gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free diet, there’s not much she can eat at the buffet, but she can eat her weight in crab legs (without the butter dip, of course). The legs were hard for me to open last time (that’s what he said LOL they aren’t pre-cut like the ones I used to eat on Sycuan Sundays pre-covid 😅 and the stroke caused weakness in my hands—it doesn’t really affect my day-to-day unless I’m opening a jar, cracking crab legs, or taking a cardio pop dance class where I have to use my hands and arms LOL).

(via @nickkroll)

This is me except with my dad 😅

Every time I get off the phone with him after he calls me (weekly!) with a computer question, I always tell myself, ‘You need to be nice and calm the fuck down.’ He thinks since I’m a graphic designer, I know everything about computers. He has a PC, and I’ve been using a Mac for the past 20 years. Also, how am I supposed to help him from LA??? It’s not like he’s facetiming me with questions. I can’t see what’s going on.

Anyway, happy Father’s Day to all who celebrate! I hope your kids are nice to you today 😆 (Please don’t facetime us).

POV: When 3-year-olds play carnival arcade games 🤡

No clowns were harmed in the making of this video (literally, not a single clown was hit 🤣).

The perfect graduation card doesn’t exi- 🎓✌🏼

Today is the ONLY Friday the 13th in 2025!

(via @trailguidegoose)

Celebrate accordingly 💀🔪🍎

(via @daniellefrankenstein04)

I didn’t even know there was a curfew in place until I checked in with my coworker, Thalia, who lives in DTLA, to make sure she was safe. I’m so disgusted with everything happening right now, and these posts on social media are fueling my rage 🤬

(via @daiifrr)

(via @spencewuah)

(via @montemader)

(via @salinas_chronicle)

(via @sarahkatesilverman)

(via @ezbandofficial)

And as if Instagram knew I needed some reprieve from all these videos, my algorithm showed me this sweet genre crossover cover that I never knew I needed in my life 😆

I used to LOVE Linkin Park in my twenties, and was heartbroken when their frontman, Chester Bennington, committed suicide in 2017. I didn’t want to like them when they got a new lead singer, Emily Armstrong, especially after it came out that she supported Danny Masterson during his rape trial (that he was convicted for), but I do understand that the show must go on. The rest of the bandmates still have to make a living and have families to feed. I loved Mike Shinoda’s solo endeavors, though, and I wish I saw him live at the inaugural Dia De Los Deftones Festival.

Golden hour ✨🌿🔮✌🏼

Love, love, love my new gemstone hanging from Fierce Forward. It came just in time for the Strawberry Moon 🌕

Christine suggested I try making sourdough bread, and I never back down from a challenge.

(via @ournewyorkhomestead)

I just thought sourdough bread was something white girls started making during covid. Am I wrong??? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’m just waiting for the 233-year-old sourdough starter I bought from San Francisco to come in. You guys, I don’t half ass anything—I always use my whole ass 😜🍑

(via @brett_rook)

BRB, buying an XL Tom Wilson Capitals Jersey ✌🏼

My mom called me to make sure I was safe from the protests happening in LA right now. I’m v far from DTLA. ICE isn’t doing any raids in Manhattan Beach! Is this really where Trump wants to focus his resources? 🙄 Deploying the National Guard and Marines to LA? Where the fuck were they during the January 6 Insurrection that Trump incited???

I was eating at a cafe the other week, and they were playing Spanish radio. I almost spit out my turkey and brie croissant when I heard a commercial of the secretary of homeland security threatening illegal immigrants:

Are they buying ads on Spanish radio now??? I get emails from Redondo Beach News Update, and I can’t take them seriously when they allow Kim K. to buy ads in their emails. Everything I know about the Kardashians, I learned against my will.

(via @whiphand2022)

Also, this Trump-Elon Twitter feud is wild. I used to be active on Twitter, but I left after Elon Musk acquired it, changed its name to ‘X’, and reinstated Trump’s account (he was banned while I was using it). I still can’t believe this man-child is our president (again).

God help America 🇺🇸

If this graphic designer thing doesn’t work out, I’ll probably build charcuterie boards, or become a private investigator IDK ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I don’t usually commit to things like exercise on a Saturday morning, but I ended up signing up for the class, partly because everyone else was doing it and I have serious FOMO, but mostly because I’m extra and made the girls self-care gift bags.

All the gift bags contained everything below, but I added some goodies (like Scotchmallows for Shi and fake lashes for Christine LOL):

• Spa Headband
• Face Masks
• Eye Masks
• Stress Relief Hand Cream
• Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies – when we had our wellness weekend in Joshua Tree, we were talking about how good apple cider vinegar is for you, but most of us couldn’t stomach the taste. IDK if these gummies have the same nutritional value as actual apple cider vinegar, but they taste like candy! If I could take all my medication in gummy form, I would 😆

Also, is this a flex??? Because this is how I swallow my meds every day (16 not counting the 3 I take in gummy form LOL). Should I add this skill to my Tinder bio? 😜

(via @waitwhatdelb)

Update: The last time I took a cardio dance class was before covid with this same instructor at Culture Shock in Old Town. I walked 2 miles with Pammie around her neighborhood afterward and my knees were cracking like glow sticks.

Actual footage of me after all that exercise:

(via @cathiehightshoe)

If you thought I was gonna doordash Randy’s Donuts on National Donut Day, you weren’t wrong 🍩

Wait, they don’t love you like I love you

The world’s a roller coaster
And I am not strapped in
Maybe I should hold with care
But my hands are busy in the air saying
I wish you were here

I’m not a perfect person
There’s many things I wish I didn’t do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you

You’ll drive in my car
Just tell me we are going somewhere

Used to know you well, now I’m chasing a ghost
Dancing with your skeleton’s rattling bones

What do you say?
Is this the time
For one more try
At a happy life

My concert lineup’s looking stacked. Is it summer yet???

‘Cause sooner or later, this is bound to stop
Come on, let’s savor what we’re falling for

I have loved Young the Giant since my twenties, and I’ve seen them live several times since then across different cities – LA, SD, OC, SF, Tempe… Their ‘In the Open’ live acoustic sessions fill my heart with so much joy, and they’re taking them on tour this summer. I’m def gonna see them, but where should I go? Hawaii for their first show at the Waikiki Shell? Pappy & Harriet’s in Pioneertown (the only drivable option)? At The National in Richmond, Virginia (Poppy the pygmy hippo lives at a zoo over there LOL)? Their last show at Red Rocks Amphitheatre in Colorado (a beautiful venue I’ve always wanted to go to, but it’s right before my dad’s birthday)? All of them? 😜

Update:
✅ Tickets purchase to Pappy and Harriet’s show
✅ Room booked at Pioneertown Motel

Dealbreakers:

• Trump supporter
• Raiders fan
• Super religious
• Eats Hawaiian pizza
• Vegetarian
• Drives a Cybertruck

IDK though, I’ve said I’d never do stuff before, and I did them 😅

I used to leave lengthy voicemails telling people about my day, but that was 20 years ago when I was young and stupid and forced people to hear about my life. I mean, I still have this blog after 20 years, but looking at it is a choice 😆 Also, if you leave me a voicemail now, I probably won’t check it.

Squash blossom pizza (@ Gjelina)

Def not a gluten-free saint over here (@ Sinners & Saints Desserts)

Office hours (@ Wolf At The Door)

(via @mayaandhunter)

I tend to gravitate toward red or pink sweets.

There’s a Trader Joe’s kitty corner from my apartment, and I was craving something sweet after dinner, so I put my bra on and went over there 15 minutes before closing specifically for Japanese Taiyaki. I didn’t see it in the dessert freezer section I got it from last time, so I picked up some random sweets and went back to the freezer section to check if they restocked it in the minute I was gone LOL. There was this bearded white guy there telling his girl about the taiyaki – ‘I heard they have these Japanese waffles filled with custard that are supposed to be good.’ I was like, ‘OMG, they’re soooo good. I came here for them, but it looks like they’re out of stock.’ He was like, ‘I’ll have to try them then! I asked someone, and they said it’ll be back in stock June 1st.’ Meanwhile, his girl is looking at me like, ‘Dafuq are you???’ 😅 She was not amused by me talking to her man about creamy Japanese fish 😆

Also, I fear this would work on me:

(via @naughtyynate)

Yesterday sucked.

I was off, because they gave the Advertising department the extra day off for Memorial Day, so they had to give it to the web team because we’re part of their department again. So I slept in a little and planned to leave for SD before noon. Noon turned into 1pm, then 1pm turned into 2pm. By the time I got my shoes on, I checked Google Maps, and it said it would take 4 fucking hours to get to SD. I was like, nah, I’ll just wait till later tonight to leave. I was going to take a nap (I’ve been really tired this past week and have had very little appetite, so gonna go to the doctor’s next week if it continues) when I got this alert on my phone from my mom:

I’ve never gotten one of these alerts before, so I called her, and she was fine at her sister’s house. Her phone was sending random SOS alerts all day (I got it four more times), and it never even sent me an alert when she fell and broke her wrist months ago.

I had a nightmare during my nap, woke up again around 7pm, and as I was leaving my building, I had to creep my car forward over the sidewalk so I could see the cross-street traffic and tell when there’s an opening for me to make a right turn. I live on a main street, and there are always cars zooming by. There was this guy jogging with his dog and another dude walking by himself about a block away. I was still waiting for an opening when they got to my car, and the guy jogging with his dog passed behind my car because I had left plenty of room, and the asshole walking by himself banged on the back of my car with his fists. Are you fucking kidding me right now? I almost lost it and drove after him. I had to fill up before heading down, so I bought some strawberry belts at the gas station to make me feel better LOL. I could see the bumper-to-bumper traffic on the 405 as I filled up, and I was like, ‘WTF, Google Maps said no traffic.’ I got on the freeway, and could immediately see police lights. They funneled three lanes into one, and I drove by four mangled cars, one with all the airbags deployed in it. It really put things in perspective. No matter how shitty I thought my day was, these people were having a worse day than I was.

I just put on my julian playlist and ate my strawberry belts.

I saw that Julian Casablancas’ side band, The Voidz, have a show coming up, but I just like The Strokes and Julian’s solo tracks, nothing by The Voidz. Plus, the show is in fucking Riverside. I’ve seen The Strokes a few times, and each time they sucked. IDK if Julian just hates LA or what, but every time I’ve seen him, he has either left early or just so obviously didn’t want to be there. And I feel sorry for the band because he’s the only one being an asshole. It’s like whiskey dick, drugs and alcohol are all fun and games till you actually have to perform 😅 So I just listen to his music on Spotify now where he can’t disappoint me 😆

Please excuse my bitching, I’m on my period 😅

Nori and I play Wordle, Strands and Connections on the daily. In yesterday’s Connections, I was like, ‘All these characters are green: Shrek, Grinch, Hulk… El-PHAY-ba. El-FA-ba. How the fuck do you say her name?’ Nori was like, ‘It’s EL-pha-ba.’ I’ve never seen Wicked so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I remember being at the movies with a guy, and the credits were rolling at the end, and he was like, ‘Who the fuck was Zo?’ I was like, ‘Zo? It’s pronounced ‘Zo-ee.’ The main character?’ He had never seen ‘Zoe’ spelled before so didn’t know how to pronounce it. I remember thinking, ‘You stupid bitch 🤣’ and now look who’s a stupid bitch now 😅

Where’s the lie??? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Other foods I don’t like:

• yellow mustard
• ginger
• strawberry ice cream
• pickles on food (i’ll eat them separately)
• raisins in savory food
• coconut in savory food

You should be writing this down 📝

(via @todayyearsold)

I’m not the kind of Asian who does karaoke, but if a guy started singing Disturbed’s Down with the Sickness, I’d marry him, probably.

I spent the weekend at the bestie’s. She’s been having a rough time dealing with chemo, so I brought her a few gifts – another @wearebewell IV zip hoodie for her weekly treatments and some comfortable head wraps, because she lost her hair from the chemo and doesn’t want her husband and kids to see her like this 🥺 And the best gift of all, my presence, of course 😜

I wore my Capitals shirt, and her husband was like, ‘You like hockey now?’ Mostly just the Capitals’ right winger, Tom Wilson. Also, my eyes are up here 👀 He complimented me on my Let’s Watch Horror Movies shirt when I visited last month, and I said the same thing 😜

The first time I went to Rise was a magical experience. So much has happened since then… The pandemic, all my grandparents passed away, three of my dear friends got breast cancer, our dog died, I had a stroke, I like hockey now LOL.

The musical artist who performed when I went was Vancouver Sleep Clinic, a band I knew and reminded me of Bon Iver, but were relatively unknown. People def weren’t there for the musical artist. They really stepped it up for their 10-year anniversary! John Mayer (my guiltiest pleasure) and Patrick Watson (singer of my favorite sad French song). Vegas in October, anyone?

I want you in the worst way
Is the gate code still your birthday?

Et quand tu es seule pendant un instant
Ramasse-moi quand tu voudras
Embrasse-moi quand tu voudras

After such an unforgettable experience at Rise, we returned the next year, and it was TERRIBLE. It was raining that weekend, and we kept checking to see if the event was canceled, but they kept saying it was still happening, just to arrive earlier, because they were gonna do the initial rise of the lanterns earlier because of the weather. So we arrived early, trudged through mud because it was raining in the desert, hours passed with no update, and while I was waiting in line for a hot dog LOL, an announcement came over the speakers that the event was canceled, and we had to leave immediately and could not take the lanterns with us. Everyone was PISSED. Nobody who goes to this event actually lives in Vegas, so everyone had travelled just for this festival.

I wouldn’t mind so much if the event got rained out again this year, as long as John Mayer and Patrick Watson still performed. The rain would mask my tears (though nothing can hide my ugly crying face 😅).

Partly because the Dodgers had a second Shohei Ohtani bobblehead giveaway night this season, but mostly because my Dodger gear riles you up ✌🏼⚾ (@ Dodger Stadium)

Our tickets had access to the Stadium Club. Listen, it doesn’t matter what team is playing. Your girl loves club seats, exclusive club access, and air conditioning.

It was a blowout. 19-2 Dodgers, and Ohtani scored 2 homeruns. It’s sacrilege being from SD and rooting for the Dodgers, but NGL, it feels nice to root for a winning team (the Padres have lost the last 3 games I attended – 2/3 of those games against the Dodgers 😅).

I’m so sick of lemonade
All the squeeze ain’t worth the juice
Pour some sugar over mе
Still not sweet enough for you
Got a lotta shit to say
Even more you nеver do
Tell me, what’s it gonna take
To make a good thing out of you?

I shared Maren Morris with my cousin’s daughter after she told me she surprisingly likes country music now after watching Ransom Canyon on Netflix LOL. I don’t really like country music (or the conservative values associated with it), but I love Maren and have seen her live at The Greek. To me, she leans more towards pop (she has a song with Zedd, after all), and I thought Jay would appreciate Maren’s songs about female empowerment ✊🏼 She’s a single mom with twin baby girls and such a baddie 😎

Girl, won’t you stop your cryin’?
I know that you’re tryin’
Everything’s gonna be okay
Baby girl, don’t you hang your head low
Don’t you lose your halo
Everyone’s gonna be okay

This is where it’s gonna end
Not gonna try to be your friend
All I want is you to get
Out of my heart, out of my head
This is how a woman leaves
Even though it’s killing me
I’ll make it look so easy
That even I believe me

She DM’d me Maren’s new album, and I am obsessed. Maren has a show at my favorite venue in SD, and I might have to go.

*googles ‘cute country concert outfits’*

The Padres, Capitals and Golden Knights all lost tonight, but at least I can console myself with free french fries tomorrow…

One of my favorite things to eat when it’s hot as balls outside is this chicken salad. It’s cold and refreshing and naturally gluten and dairy-free, so Pammie can eat it, too. I used to eat it when I’d do Whole30, so I always made it with Primal Kitchen Mayo (it’s free of gluten, grains, soy, canola oil, processed seed oils, refined sugar, and dairy). It’s good by itself, but I like to eat it on a big ass Costco croissant. Or crackers. Pretty much any vehicle to get it in my mouth 😜

Make it and thank me later (and invite me over for lunch).

Chicken Salad with Grapes and Walnuts
Adapted from Bowl of Delicious

Ingredients:

• Rotisserie Chicken Breast Meat – Costco sells their rotisserie chicken meat fully cooked and hand-pulled. You could def boil and shred your own chicken breasts, but why??? I’m not trying to use my stove on a hot ass day.
• Primal Kitchen Mayo – it’s pricier than regular mayo, but you can sub regular mayo if you don’t want to spend $12 on a jar of mayo have any dietary restrictions.
• Seedless Red Grapes sliced in halves
• Diced Red Onion
• Diced Celery
• Walnuts
• Salt & Pepper to taste

Directions:

I made a huge batch, so I used an entire package of Rotisserie Chicken Breast Meat (46 oz.), a whole jar of Primal Kitchen Mayo (12 oz.), a bunch of seedless red grapes sliced in half (2 lbs.), half a diced red onion (you can usually find the onions already diced in the refrigerated produce section of the grocery store) a bunch of diced celery (you can also find them already diced), chopped walnuts (16 oz.) and salt & pepper to taste. Combine everything in a large bowl and refrigerate. Enjoy!

(via @dylanstretchbery)

We’re having a heat wave and I am unwell 😅

Happy Mother’s Day to all who celebrate!

I told my sister’s husband that if the Washington Capitals win the Eastern Conference and the Vegas Golden Knights win the Western Conference, then I’ll go to Vegas for a Stanley Cup finals game. He was like, ‘IDK why you’re single. You like hockey. You like baseball.’

Additionally, my stupid tits look excellent in team gear. I’m 3 for 3! 😜

(via @liblibee)

I was today years old when I found out that there’s such a thing as kangaroo leather, and also that Adidas’ iconic shoe is called the ‘Samba‘ 👵🏻 To be fair, I don’t really know the names of any shoes, even though I’ve worked for a footwear company for over a decade 😅

We did a Star Wars collabo once, and my coworker had to tell me what a Death Star was, an X-Wing, a Stormtrooper… I’ve never seen Star Wars, so I couldn’t make the kids’ presentation without that nerd 😅

I’m just a web designer, guys ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Everyone’s been hitting me up today, because my employer for the past 13 years publicly announced to the world (and to their employees) that they were sold to a private investment firm this morning.

Well, everyone except for my dad, who sent me this video of a squirrel eating nuts in my parents’ backyard 😆 Yes, we’re the kind of people who feed wild animals (I also gave my dad a Birdbuddy last Christmas).

They haven’t announced any big changes yet, but I’m ready with my online portfolio in case shit pops off ✌🏼

I did it all for the gluten and dairy free chocolate chip cookie(s) 🤘🏼

I actually did it for my sister, who’s on a gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free diet 😆 These cookies were… eh. The texture was off, and they weren’t very sweet. I guess they could work in a pinch if you’re craving something sweet, but I’d rather eat something sweet that’s naturally gluten and dairy-free, like a piece of fruit 😆

Pammie said she liked them, but she’s been eating clean for the past 2 months. I’ve been eating dirty for 43 years, though, so I could tell 😅

We gave some to my parents without saying they were gluten and dairy-free, and this was the response:

Did you make these?

– my dad 🤢

If I’m at a resto and a dessert says it’s ‘gluten-free’ or ‘dairy-free’ I automatically pass on it. The worst dessert I ever had was this vegan churro abomination from Tocaya (a resto that has since closed down in El Segundo, but still has other locations throughout LA). We didn’t know it was vegan when we ordered it, but we sure found out after that first bite.

Beers + cheers (@ Yakitori Tsuta)

The girls and I try to get together at least once a month to stay updated on each other’s lives. One of them has an upcoming colonoscopy (lovely dinnertime conversation), and she joked that she used to ask for a ride to a boy’s house, then a ride to the club, now a ride to her colonoscopy 👵🏻 She said her doctor suggested rubbing petroleum jelly on her booty hole to prevent it from getting raw and irritated during prep 😳 When we toasted our drinks, Jessie was like, ‘Cheers to anal!’ and I nearly spit out my sake. Some dribbled down my chin, but I swallowed most of it like a good girl 😜 

Jessie’s mom got harassed in Eastlake of all places (a predominantly Filipino/Mexican community) by a Mexican! And Baby Isaac is half Mexican! I never walk around my neighborhood in LA without my box cutter, pepper spray, and stun gun. Come at me, bro!

They just finished building this nice house that I pass by every day in Manhattan Beach. I looked it up on Redfin, and it’s selling for $6.3 million 😅 I’ve never felt unsafe in this bougie ass neighborhood, but you never know when you’ll need to cut a bitch!

…or what happens when I go to Trader Joe’s hungry 🤪

I went there for oatmeal (not pictured).

Update: Just had some of the papas rellenas for breakfast, and they taste just like the potato balls from Porto’s! 😲 I will def be buying more of these!

No more standing in this ridiculous line in the rain (@ Porto’s)

Pretty sure my husband lives in this house I drove by in Hermosa Beach today.

(via @hockeytrolls)

This is accurate AF. Also, I fear that this would work on me 😅

(via @callmeosound)

Since there are four kids between Christine and Jessie, I told them I’d do the fifth harmony when Isaac starts talking 😆

So much on my mind
I think I think too much
Read between these lines
But time comes to rest
When you are by my side
It blurs

Just got tickets to Kevin Garrett @ Gold-Diggers in Hollywood next month. He’s celebrating 10 years of his first EP, Mellow Drama. It was the album that made me a fan of his, and I try to catch him whenever he’s in LA. He was the last show I saw before the pandemic hit, and the first show I went to after the stroke. I’m a bit of a masochist 💔

(via @sweetannieod)

(via @akaiboyce32)

Are all goalies like this? 🥹

(via @espn)

Tom Wilson (my favorite hockey player and general light of my life) got into a brawl on the bench (he was suspended for six games last year for cross-checking another player in the face with his hockey stick, has previously been suspended five different times before that, and currently has the most penalty minutes in the league 😅). All the while, these two softies on opposing teams are holding hands in the back watching the fight unfold 😆

My favorite dessert while vacationing in the Philippines was taho – soft silken tofu with brown sugar syrup and sago (tapioca pearls) or boba. It’s a cheap, refreshing snack that’s available almost anywhere. In populous areas, there’s usually a man walking up and down the street yelling, “Tahoooo!” They have two metal covered buckets balancing on a wooden pole on their shoulders filled with taho accoutrements.

I was craving taho after we came back to the. U.S. so I made some for me and my family following this easy recipe. My parents said it tasted just like home, and my mom volunteered me to make it for an upcoming party at my Uncle’s house.

I bought some metal pails for the tofu and boba, a coffee carafe to keep the brown sugar syrup warm, and clear cups for people to build their own taho. I decorated the table with a festive Mexican blanket, a letterboard with instructions, and these hats made out of palm leaves that a hospitality worker from the resort we stayed at in El Nido made for us on our first trip to the Philippines 5 years ago.

You guys, I don’t half ass anything—I always use my whole ass 🍑😜

I woke up in a bad mood.

It’s been crazy at work this week, since they let go of six designers and expect the rest of us to pick up the slack. I haven’t even lunch’d with Nori once this week! I fell asleep right after work yesterday, and it was way too late to eat dinner by the time I finally woke up, so I just went back to bed.

I had to wake up butt ass early this morning to go to SD, so I double doordashed a breakfast burrito from Caps & Corks Liquor and a cold brew from Coffee Bean. The burrito arrived and was left on my front doormat while I was in the shower. The coffee arrived half an hour later. I was like, ‘I’ll just grab it on my way out and eat/drink it in the car.’ I opened my door to leave and only saw the coffee there. I checked my Doordash app and the dasher took a picture of it on my doormat so I know he delivered it to the right apartment.

This guy is the nastiest skank bitch I’ve ever met. Do NOT trust him. He is a fugly slut!

I emailed Michael Douglas (my building manager, not the actor LOL), to ask him to look at the security footage to see who took my burrito. There’s cameras all over my building and signs everywhere that you’re being recorded. It turns out it was the dasher who delivered my coffee who stole my burrito. Eat a bag of dicks, Germano!

I was already hangry from skipping dinner last night, then this asshole stole my breakfast burrito, then a stupid Rivian truck cut me off on the 405 on the 3-hour drive down to SD where it was pouring rain the whole time.

Why do I have such bad luck with burritos in LA? Both literally and figuratively 😆

(via @nick_tellez)

(via @ben.and.zara)

(via @childishmazbino)

Usually, my instagram algorithm is nothing but dogs and Moo Deng, but these videos popped up on my feed and I’m into it 🤘🏼

…or me watching the Stanley Cup Playoffs and googling how old these hot hockey players are. Born in 2004?! I have piercings that are older than you 👵🏻

‘Cause we were just kids when we fell in love
Not knowing what it was
I will not give you up this time

I’ve been following this guy ever since I heard him sing a cover of Ed Sheeran’s ‘Perfect’ on YouTube. I can’t stand Ed Sheeran, and Leroy Sanchez made this song more palatable and 1000x better 😆

So let’s just say goodbye for now
Who knows one day our time may come around

He finally dropped his first full-length album, and it did not disappoint! This is my favorite track 💔

Actual footage of me listening to this album on the drive back to LA last night 😅

My sister’s mother-in-law always treats my family out to lunch on major holidays at Barona (where she’s a Diamond member), so I made her an Easter-themed charcuterie board. I also made one for my mom, because I know that crazy b will be butt hurt if I give one to my sister’s MIL and not her 😆

Pammie has been having serious thyroid issues, so her doctor suggested she cut out gluten, soy and dairy before it becomes full blown Hashimoto’s disease.

She has been doing so well, and I wanted to make something special she could eat. One of my favorite dishes ever is the Spicy Fusilli Vodka at Jon & Vinny’s in LA. Carbs and alcohol? What’s not to love? Luckily, vodka is naturally gluten-free, so I just found some gluten-free pasta, dairy-free parm, and replaced the heavy cream with coconut milk. Normally, I don’t like coconut in savory food, but you couldn’t even tell I swapped the dairy out. The result was *chef’s kiss* 😙🤌

Usually, I hate meal prepping for myself, but I don’t mind doing it for my sister, or even for our old dog, Rocky. I used to cut up vegetables and cook chicken for him when we started feeding him fresh food during the last years of his life 😭 You make concessions for the ones you love…

(via @hungryinla)

I’ve been meaning to try this breakfast burrito spot since I first saw @hungryinla post about it. It’s nearby and down PCH in Hermosa Beach. They only have breakfast burritos Friday-Sunday, and you have to pre-order them on instagram starting on Wednesdays. Only in fucking LA do you have to pre-order your food on instagram. It seemed like a lot of trouble for a breakfast burrito, so I never thought to do it till earlier this week when I was having lunch across the street from it and remembered they were there.

(@ Baran’s 2239)

I ordered the no-meat breakfast burrito (I love me some bacon or chorizo in my burrito, but I’m still not eating pork 😩). I got home and cut this baby open and it was full of fucking bacon. I tried to pick around it, but it was stuck in there with all that gooey cheese. I’m just gonna give it to my sister’s husband when I head down to SD this weekend. Bah! I DM’d the resto on IG, and they were super apologetic. I’m gonna come back next Friday to take another stab at the no-meat breakfast burrito.

It came with red and green salsas, too. My go-to breakfast burrito spot up here was Phanny’s in Redondo. The burrito was good, but I asked for salsa, and they gave me a dang Tapatio packet. I would have given them five stars on Google for the burrito and the ocean view, but had to knock off one star for not having housemade salsa.

What’s a girl gotta do to get a good burrito in LA? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I make gift bags for my friends every holiday—it’s my love language (yes, BBQ is also my love language… your girl’s hella lingual). I always include stuff for their husbands because I get along swimmingly with all of them 😊 I always pack extra Nerds Gummy Clusters for Jessie’s husband because it’s his favorite candy. She knows that, so I think she ate them on purpose 😜

• Lost Farm Strawberry Pink Jesus Live Resin Fruit Chews – partly because He is risen, but mostly because Easter falls on 420 😜
• Sugarfina Easter Bunny Tails
• Sour Punch Easter Straws
• Nerds Gummy Clusters Easter Variety Mix
• Haribo Easter Spring Mix Egg Hunt
• Sour Patch Kids Easter Bunnies Theater Box
• Starburst Easter Original Fun Size
• See’s Candies Scotchmallow Eggs
• Reese’s Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Eggs
• Reese’s Pieces Peanut Butter Easter Candy Gift Bag
• Twix Easter Minis
• Snickers Minis Milk Chocolate Easter Candy Bars
• Kit Kat Miniatures Milk Chocolate Wafer Easter Candy
• Hershey’s Cookies ‘N’ Crème Polka Dot Eggs Easter Candy

You guys, I’m not mad at this bunny filter. Hoppy Easter, y’all! 🐰

Nori and I always play Wordle, Connections and Strands on our lunch break. We stopped by Starbucks to split a brownie, and they had a bunch of board games, so we played a couple rounds of Connect Four, too.

The last time I remember playing Connect Four was at a dessert cafe in Los Feliz with Deane after a concert one night. I was so drunk, that I dropped the cookie I was eating into the grid instead of a token 😆 Apparently, I’m no better at this game when I’m sober, because I lost every single game to Nori today 😅

My AOL screen name used to be GUMMYI3EAR, and I used to watch the Adventures of the Gummi Bears cartoon every Saturday morning when I was a kid. All to say, my special relationship with gummy bears spans decades 🤪

When I visited the bestie earlier this month, her youngest daughter was telling me about the viral TikTok trend of gummy bears soaked in Sprite and frozen. She said she tried it and it turned out sooo good, and she also tried it with ginger ale and it tasted better than the ones soaked in Sprite.

(via @thefeedfeed)

This reel popped up on my feed yesterday, and knew I had to try it myself. I had leftover gummy bears from the gift bags I made for Easter, and since I don’t drink soda, I picked up a prebiotic Olipop Ginger Ale to soak them in 😆

Were they worth the hype? Ehh, I’m a purist. I’d rather eat plain gummy bears. I also don’t think I like Olipop in any flavor. It contains stevia instead of real sugar, and I’d rather have no sugar than fake sweetener. I’m the kind of girl who can tell the difference between Coke and Pepsi (if the resto only had Pepsi, I’d just get water!). I was so bummed when Costco switched from Coke to Pepsi in all their food courts back in the day, and this year they switched back to Coke, but I don’t drink soda anymore 😭

(via @drfeliciaphd)

I had a routine mammogram last week. They found breast cancer in two of my dear friends during routine mammograms in the past few years, so I already have anxiety going in. I got a message that they have to redo my mammogram because they didn’t get a good image of my left breast. The tech who did my mammo was too distracted figuring out what kind of Asian I was to do her job, and now I have to go back.

To be fair, I never know what kind of Asian people are (Japanese, Korean, Chinese… I can’t tell the difference 😅), but I would never ask someone what kind of Asian they are. I was at Sugarfina last week, and this black dude visiting the cashier asked what kind of Asian I was, and I was like, ‘Filipino’ and he was like, ‘I love Pacquiao!’ 🙄 I haven’t liked Pacquaio since he made some homophobic comments. Please don’t associate him with all Filipinos.

At least my bewbs are very squishy and malleable like stress balls LOL, so mammogram machines flattening the shit out of my tits isn’t painful for me. Plus, the women’s imaging center is next to Torikizoku, so I’ll reward myself with some yakitori afterward 😆

We always have little earthquakes in LA, but they never feel them in San Diego and vice versa. This morning, as I was in a group text with the girls chatting about one of their employees at UCSD asking to come in late today because they were still recovering from Coachella (like just say you aren’t feeling well and be on your way!), an earthquake hit SD, and it was so strong, I felt it in LA!

I hope everyone’s okay. Also, if this is an indication that the big one is coming, I should probably start wearing pants to bed.

*types in chonies*

Prosecco & Pals Booze & Bitches (@ Gravity Heights)

Full Pink Moon tonight ✨

It’s no secret that I love Moo Deng the pygmy hippo, but IDK if I’ll ever make it to Thailand to see her in person.

Also, I always have my Pic Stitch app cued up whenever the opportunity arises to do a side-by-side comparison 😆

Another pygmy hippo, Poppy, was born last December at Metro Richmond Zoo in Virginia. Domestic flights to Richmond from LAX are pretty cheap, plus I have hella Southwest points. Anyone want to go with me on a weekend trip to Richmond? 😆 If pygmy hippos aren’t your thing, CNN Travel also named Richmond #1 on their list of America’s Best Towns to Visit in 2024!

Do I like hockey now? Or just Tom Wilson from the Capitals?

Or just whatever the hell is happening in this video? 😏

According to Google, ‘Average professional hockey players retire between the ages of 25–30, but most players hang up the skates long before this’. Am I too old to be a puck bunny? (Don’t answer that).

I get my nails done off of PCH, so it’s always a nice drive to and from the salon. They had Kitchen Nightmares on as I was getting my nails done, and I was tearing up because Gordon Ramsay was yelling at this dad/owner of a Greek resto that needed help. I couldn’t even wipe the tear rolling down my cheek, because Cindy was doing my nails LOL. I watch a lot of food shows, but they’re all on The Food Network. I’m much too sensitive for these off-network shows! The family on TV was sad, too, that the dad was getting yelled at, and the girl getting her nails done next to me yelled, ‘If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the kitchen!’ I was thinking, ‘Is she yelling at me or the TV?’ 😅

Anyway, here is part of my drive home set to the saddest song ever 😭

If you thought I was gonna doordash food from The Empanada Shop on National Empanada Day, you weren’t wrong.

I also got an apple pie churro empanada for dessert. Or shall I say mmm-panada 😋 (I’ll see myself out).

FYI, I hate raisins in empanadas, and I tell anyone who will listen. I don’t mind them in sweet stuff, but I don’t like raisins in savory food. I also don’t like coconut in savory food (coconut shrimp, thai food, etc.), but don’t mind it in dessert. I also don’t like pineapple in savory food. Ordering a Hawaiian pizza is blasphemous and a dealbreaker. You should be writing this down 📝

Today is the bestie’s birthday 🥳 I spent the weekend with her and gave her some goodies.

(via @wearebewell)

She was recently diagnosed with breast cancer, and has been getting weekly chemo treatments. She was just telling me how she has to keep her arm out of her jacket for the IV, and how cold it gets in the treatment room, so this gift was perfect!

I gave her some souvenirs from my Japan trip, most notably this amulet I picked up from the Meiji Shrine that’s supposed to be for recovery from illness. I got myself the amulet for finding a good partner 😅

I also sent her this stuffie, partly bc I love getting surprises in the mail, but mostly because I know she hates capybaras but this stuffie is so cute! It’s out for delivery, so IDK what her reaction is yet 😆

When Alicia’s husband complimented me on the shirt I was wearing, I was like, ‘My eyes are up here, Ray.’ 😜

I was subscribing to Factor meals for a while, but there are some nights I’d rather doordash a chalupa from Taco Bell than eat a nutritious pre-made meal. After two weeks of giving the meals to Christine (because I didn’t want to waste a week of dinners, plus I knew that they’d make that busy mama’s life easier), I canceled my subscription and she gave me a bunch of girl scout cookies in return 😜

She asked me what flavors I liked, and I was like, ‘I’ll have one… One of everything!’ 😅 Her kid’s connect didn’t have the new french toast cookies (toast-yays), so she reached out to an old friend (who also happens to be my ex’s ex-girlfriend) because her kid is a girl scout and was selling that flavor. If that’s not a ride-or-die, I don’t know what is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My blood-glucose levels spiked after eating a sleeve of Thin Mints, so I need to slow the fuck down on inhhaling these 😅 *checks expiration dates*

(via @kelseydianeblog)

The girls ask me who I’m fucking on the regular (my married friends like to live vicariously through me and think my single life in LA is way more exciting than it actually is).

You guys, the only thing keeping my bed warm at night is this Beetlejuice squishmallow Christine’s kids gave me for Christmas and this Moo Deng plushie my mom’s baby sister gave me as a thank you for treating them out in Japan.

Sidenote: The first thing I did when I found out about the tragic 7.7 earthquake in Thailand was make sure Moo Deng was ok 😅 (she’s at the Khao Kheow Open Zoo in Si Racha, Chonburi, Thailand).

…or how I ask for favors at work.

On an unrelated note, I just completed the company-mandated sexual harassment training in Workday this week, and can confirm that I’m wildly inappropriate 😅

It smells like Doyer dogs and betrayal up in here (@ Dodger Stadium)

I don’t always root for the Dodgers, but when I do, it’s while wearing crude apparel on Shohei Ohtani bobblehead giveaway night ✌🏼⚾

Update: I was born and bred in San Diego, and it’s sacrilege to support the Dodgers there 😅 I never wear my Dodgers hat when I’m in SD or my Padres hat when I’m in LA (except for that one time I went to a playoff game at Dodger Stadium and the Padres got murdered). But my rack really does look fantastic here LOL, so I had to post it, if only for the one person who still reads this thing (Hi, Shirley May 👋🏼).

I know it’s gonna be a good day if I see a dog while stuck in traffic, or if I hear Hoobastank on the radio while driving.

On an unrelated note, my sister loaned me some of her Prozac until mine can get refilled later this week 🤪

Is this an actual commercial? It feels like an SNL skit 🙄

It’s giving Liam Neeson in Taken.

Also, last I checked, most mass shooters and meth heads in the US were white. Stop blaming immigrants for America’s problems.

Partly because Nori observes Lent and can’t eat meat on Fridays, but mostly because I wanted to go to the beach (@ Playa Hermosa Fish & Oyster Co.)

Mumford & Sons – Rushmere

Light me up, I’m wasted in the dark
Rushmere, restless hearts in the end

Lord Huron – Nothing I Need

You’re the one I’ll never get
And you’re the one thing that I need

New music from Mumford & Lord Huron today 💔

Linkin Park, Evanescence and Sum 41 also released new songs today 😳 Is it 2001? Am I late for my shift at Parkway Plaza???

Not sure if I’m sad because I’m watching Adolescence (Netflix’s #1 show right now about a 13yo boy accused of stabbing a girl to death), because they let go of 6 designers from my web team at work this week with zero notice and now the rest of us have to pick up the slack, or because I ran out of anti-depressants 😅 The pharmacy won’t have it for 3-5 business days, so do with that information what you will.

You guys, I ate 10 egg salad sandwiches while I was in Japan. I was only there for 7 days, and I didn’t eat one on the first day. You do the horrifying math. All the convenience stores had it, and there was a 7-Eleven across from our hotel room. There was one on every block, really. I didn’t discriminate, either, I tried a convenience store egg salad sandwich from 7-Eleven, Lawson’s and the 24-hour store inside my sister’s hotel—all were equally delicious. There was even a 7-Eleven at the airport, so I picked up a sandwich for the plane ride 😅 I don’t ever eat egg salad sandwiches in the US, and the last time I remember eating one before my Japan trip was at my Grandpa Robert’s funeral in 1989 😳 I def had to try and recreate it.

I was looking up where I can get authentic Japanese milk bread in LA, and I found Ginza Nikishiwa, this ghost kitchen on Santa Monica Blvd that sells out of loaves daily within minutes of opening. The owner found out that someone was reselling loaves and marking up the price (like the dude who sells Porto’s out of his car in SD!), so she limits how many you can buy per order now. I don’t need all that stress in my life, so I just instacarted some milk bread from Tokyo Central 😅

I followed this recipe and was transported back to Tokyo.

Y’all. When it hits your lips… 美味しい

(via @patrickbarnesvine)

The first dog I ever followed on Instagram has passed away at 16, and I am unwell 🥺

I’m about to relive my youth this summer! I just bought tickets to see Incubus and Hoobastank.

The last time I saw Incubus was at this same venue two decades ago (@ North Island Credit Union Amphitheater when it was formerly known as Coors Amphitheater, and has since been called Cricket Wireless Amphitheater, Sleep Train Amphitheater, and Mattress Firm Amphitheater)

The only difference between then and now is that I’ve got money to buy front row VIP tickets now 😜

The last time I saw Hoobastank was more recently at their 20th Anniversary Show (@ The Echo) But before that, it had been well over a decade!

Is it 2003? Am I 21 again? My first ever blog post in 2003 was about Hoobastank, and here I am, 22 years later, still talking about the same shit 😜

It once took me 4 hours to drive down to San Diego for Christine’s baby shower, and I arrived with less than an hour left to partake in the taco cart. After stuffing myself with 5 tacos (the 5th one was a mistake!), I was told that the taco guy was staying an extra hour, and I didn’t need to eat all those tacos in record time.

Today, it took me 3 hours to drive down to SD for Chel’s twins and Rhea’s daughter’s birthday party in PQ. I forgot people do things differently above the 8 😅 At the last kids’ party I went to in eastside, there was a birria taco bar, a tostilocos bar, and an open bar 😆

When I got to the party, Shi’s daughter was running down the street and this is how I tried to stop her:

Also, this is me when someone asks me to watch their kid:

Jury duty has been officially served (@ Inglewood Courthouse)

After four very long days of jury selection, they called up and dismissed over half of our 100+ group, and my number wasn’t called once. I had to listen to each potential juror answer the same questions from the judge and attorneys day in and day out, though 😵‍💫

They ask if you’ve been the victim of a violent crime, and a lot of people admitted to having been raped, molested or sexually abused 😳 The follow up question was always, ‘Would that incident affect your judgement in this case?’ and people always answered ‘no’ so why put your shit on blast at all?

There was a lady who said she was date raped in her 20s. The judge asked what happened afterward, if the perpetrator was convicted, etc. She said she was too embarrassed to tell anyone, so she never pressed charges. But you’re telling a bunch of strangers right now??? Long after the statute of limitations has passed? Don’t even get me started on the statute of limitations. I don’t understand why you can’t charge someone for rape after 10 years, but murder has no limit? Are both not serious crimes???

Actual footage of me in the gallery:

Anyway, not sure what I regret more: not getting the cute court bailiff’s number (he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring, but I’m finding that lots of married men don’t) or eating four po’boys from Orleans & York this week! I was there so often, the cashier remembered my name and order 😅

Tell me the truth
Was it worth it? Was I worth it for you?
‘Cause we were perfect, we workin’ ’til you
Forgot to tell me
You been seein’ someone else for six years

Carnival across the street from the crib (@ Springfest)

Might have to put my bra back on for a churro.

If you thought I was gonna get a po’boy for the third day in a row while serving jury duty at the Inglewood courthouse, you weren’t wrong (@ Orleans & York)

We started half an hour late because one of the jurors picked yesterday was an attorney who had to prep a witness this morning in DTLA and was late to court. They ended up dismissing him and 8 other jurors, called 9 more people, and I still wasn’t picked. But I had to sit in the gallery for hours listening to the judge and lawyers ask them all the same questions from yesterday 😵‍💫 Then they dismissed 7 more jurors and picked 7 more, and I still wasn’t picked! After afternoon recess, they called out 20 more ID numbers (none of which were mine), and the rest of us thought we were getting dismissed. Turns out those 20 were free to go! Of the 7 new jurors they picked, I could tell some of them will be dismissed from their answers, so there will definitely be another round tomorrow which I have to report to for the fourth day now. I feel like I’m on an endless episode of Law & Order. Not even SVU, just the regular one without Ice-T 😆

Being here is actually more akin to a lesser known procedural drama, For The People (a Shonda Rhimes show whose cancellation in 2019 I’m still salty about), because the sassy court clerk has been keeping us entertained. She told us the story of when she broke her arm in Colombia that involved drug cartels, volcanoes, and a canoe. Worse, it happened during covid, so she had to wait a year to have surgery on her arm that was broken in eight places! Shoutout to the court clerk for Department ‘O’ at the Inglewood courthouse! Thank you for making this whole experience less painful for all of us 😆

My early 2000s heart is bursting 💗

Another day, another donut (@ Randy’s Donuts)

They started jury selection today, and 80+ jurors and I didn’t get picked. We did have to sit in the gallery for hours while the 18 selected for the jury box answered questions from the judge and attorneys. We have to report again tomorrow, because they haven’t decided on the final jury yet. At least there’s good food spots in Inglewood, and the court bailiff is nice to look at 😅

I gave up soda after the stroke. I used to drink my weight in Coke, but my blood glucose levels were through the roof. Everything in moderation, but as long as I don’t have Coke at all, I don’t crave it. I don’t even indulge in a Coke Zero once in a while.

So today, when I craved something sweet, I had an Olipop—a prebiotic soda that’s low in sugar and high in fiber. What has become of my life???

I’ve never had jury duty in LA where I had to show up in person, but today I got summoned to the Inglewood courthouse. They were short-staffed and running behind, so it was a lot of sitting around while they got their shit together. All 100+ of us got assigned to one courtroom where a man with tattoos on his face was being tried for murder 😳 We had to fill out a questionnaire before they dismissed us for the day, and we were told to return tomorrow for jury selection.

The silver lining of having jury duty in Inglewood (besides getting PTO from work) is that the courthouse is down the street from my favorite cajun deli, Orleans & York. I usually only go here when I go to a show nearby at Kia Forum or SoFi Stadium. I got a po’boy (Big Mo’s Favorite with fried shrimp and beef hot links) and banana pudding. I will probably go back here tomorrow after it’s decided whether or not a man’s fate rests in my hands 😅

I haven’t had an online portfolio since I got this job in LA 13 years ago! They pay me v well (I make more than triple what they were paying me in SD at my last job), so I’ve never looked for another job while working here, as stressful as it’s been at times.

With all the changes happening at work, I made a panic portfolio 😅 It’s better to have one and not need it, than to need one and not have it…

Doordashed corned beef hash for St. Paddy’s Day (@ Snax)

Am I doing it right?

(via @mini_robomuppets)

I got my eyebrows microbladed this past weekend, and I couldn’t be happier with the results! I’ve had this procedure done without a hitch a few times before the stroke, but when I made an appointment at a new esthetician in OC last year, they canceled my appointment after learning of my health problems. They had a bad experience before and didn’t wanna be liable. My PCP said it was still ok for me to get microbladed, so I found an esthetician nearby in Redondo who would do it. She was shocked that I didn’t bleed one drop of blood and even more shocked that I was in my 40s. She thought I was in my 20s! 🫠 To be fair, she was Brazilian (and gorgeous!), and it’s only ever non-asians who are shocked by my age. I still get carded at casinos, and you have to be 18 to be there. At my work conference earlier this year, this Mexican dude in his 30s met me and some of my Asian coworkers for the first time and his flabbers were gasted when he found out that we were all in our 40s. We’re Filipino, Chinese and Korean. What can I say, Asian don’t raisin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The porkless diaries continue…

Crispy feta, fried egg and avocado on a Carb Balance tortilla.

Pepperoni-less pizza with mushrooms and black olives for PI day (@ Fat Tomato)

Total lunar eclipse then full ‘worm moon’ tonight 🪱🌕✨

If your love for moon phases don’t run as deep as mine, here’s a cute short from Angry Birds about the love between a bird and its worm 🤪

I feel my lips, they’re turning blue
Are you great or something new?
I’m so love-starved
Are you actually my type or do I just need a bite?

File under: Shit we shouldn’t talk about in the work chat.

They’re installing Kandji on everyone’s computers at work. Supposedly it’s more secure (God forbid someone releases the new Snoop collabo early LOL), but I think they’re also monitoring us 👀 

Most of our employees use Teams (which we still use for department meetings), but the web team uses Slack on a daily basis because it’s easier for us to share screens and collaborate on that platform. Can they read Slack messages that have already been deleted? Asking for a friend (it’s me, I’m the friend). I sent some other unsavory messages during my work conference, so… 😅

Many, many, many moons ago, I sent the girls an email with the subject ‘NSFW’ containing this impressive dick pic some guy sent me that I most definitely did not ask for. A couple of them opened the email at work, because they didn’t know that ‘NSFW’ stood for ‘Not Safe For Work’ LOL! Oh, they learned that day…

Yes, I still have my emails from 2009, and yes, I still have that dick pic 😆 Only because I attached it to that email, though. I didn’t have an iPhone in 2009, and the actual text exists on an LG flip phone (only an outdated phone charger can unlock those secrets).

My porkless life continues (in more ways than one 😅)…

I had plant-based Spam, rice and eggs for breakfast. What has become of my life???

My sweet nephew is being bullied at school. We ride at dawn ✊🏻

Since playing with the micro piglets at the mipig cafe in Tokyo, I can’t bring myself to eat pork 😩 So today, instead of my usual go-to breakfast burrito (made healthier by heating up a Smart Ones Ham & Cheese Scramble, adding hot sauce, and wrapping it inside a Carb Balance Tortilla) I made sweet potato avocado toast with soft boiled eggs and a side of turkey bacon.

Not sure if I’m sad because of my breakfast, or because I’m back at work today catching up on my emails and slack and just found out that my boss is being required to go into the office every day after five years of working from home and wondering if I’m next, or because it’s raining in LA today and I’m listening to Dashboard Confessional 😅

It’s colder than it oughta be in March

In case I forgot I was back in LA this weekend, we had several earthquakes and a notification of a wildfire today, and it’s also Daylight Savings, so I woke up at 5pm instead of 4pm, because my body’s still on Tokyo Time. I’m sick, too, so I’ll recap when I’m feeling better 🤒

✅ Passport renewed
✅ PTO approved
✅ March rent paid
✅ Flights & hotels booked
✅ Private yacht chartered
✅ Micro Pig House Harajuku reservation made
✅ Warner Bros. Tokyo Harry Potter Studio tickets purchased

Airplane Essentials:

• Weekender Bag
• Macbook Pro
• Powerbeats Pro Totally Wireless Earbuds
• Electronics Organizer Travel Case
• Portable Charger
• Snacks: Blueberry Vanilla Cashew KIND Bars, Mexican Street Corn Trail Mix – I threw up once after eating the airplane meal on a red-eye to New York. Not sure if it was because of the plane food, the cocktail I also had on the plane, the late meal, or the fact that I ate dinner at the airport before the plane meal… I just bring my own snacks now 😅
• Pill Organizer – your girl stays medicated 😆
• Laneige Lip Sleeping Mask
• Neutrogena Hydro Boost Face Cleansing Wipes
• Wet Ones Antibacterial Hand Wipes
• Alaska Bear Silk Sleep Mask

I don’t even ‘rawdog‘ a 45-minute flight to Vegas, I def need all of the things on a 15-hour flight to the Philippines & Japan 😵‍💫

The first and last time I went to the Philippines was in 2020, right before the pandemic hit. We were still working in the office during that time, so when I came back, HR told me to work from home and quarantine for 2 weeks. Our lives took a 180 during those 2 weeks, and I’ve been working from home ever since! I told my boss and project managers that I’ll be mostly unreachable while on vacay for the next couple of weeks, but contact me if there’s any work chismé 😆

I leave tomorrow morning, and I still have to do my laundry, pack, and shave my legs 😅

Update: I just picked up my laundry from Suds & Duds and decided to stop by Target on the way home to pick up a box of Cap’n Crunch to top the Pinkberry I got for dinner (I’m officially on vacation,  get off me) when this asshole in a white SUV cut me off on Manhattan Beach Blvd. I threw my hands up and kept honking my horn, and the driver got scared and pulled over so I could get in front of them. When I got to Target, I took a few breaths, willed my blood pressure to go back down to a normal range, looked at myself in the rearview and was like, ‘You need to calm the fuck down.’ 😅

Nori and I went to Chick-Fil-A for lunch, and this child was screaming bloody murder inside. Straight up screaming and his mom was gentle parenting the shit out of him.

We were like… What the???

Anyway, when we got our food, there was a free cookie on our trays. Not sure if they were apology cookies for having to listen to that devil child, or if the server thought we were cute 🤪

One of my project managers emailed me that the art was approved for one of my jobs, except he must’ve been in a rush because he said that my fart was approved instead, and now I have cold brew all over my monitor 🤣

My boss, Gaye, has been in in-office meetings all day, so she left me in charge and I’m Gaye today 😆 I haven’t even taken a proper lunch, because people have been asking me questions all day, and I’m trying to get all my presentations done before I go on vacation.

I got this e-mail that there’s a listeria outbreak amongst donuts after eating an embarrassing amount of donuts last week (it was Valentine’s Day, get off me), a notification that my monthly rent is going up by $125, and a jury duty summons in the mail for fucking Inglewood 😅 What next?!

At the last two Harry Potter Padres giveaway days, each house had their own item, so Pammie had to fight trade people to get all four houses 😅

It looks like there’s only one hat this time, but a flag pin for each house. I’ll just be at Hodad’s eating a single bacon cheeseburger while Pammie sorts that out.

Can’t a girl just get a Brazilian and keep high heels in her trunk for reasons other than she’s fucking someone??? 😅

Watching Babygirl and eating my feelings, HBU?

Nori and I go to Randy’s Donuts at least once a week (after eating salads at Tender Greens—Get off us). Their donuts are always fresh, so the donuts we got were still warm. I got chocolate on my hands and Nori was like, ‘Chocolate or poop?’ There’s this scene in Baby Mama (that I reference to my sister at every opportunity I can) where Maura Tirney asks her kid if what he has on his hands is chocolate or poop, and she licks it and confirms it’s chocolate 😆 I can’t believe Nori knew that reference. Who needs a man when you have friends who get you???

Christine doordashed me a breakfast burrito this morning. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is…

Update: I had to delete my message in my work slack saying I was going to watch Babygirl tonight, because I knew it was raunchy, but had no idea it was that raunchy, and my team doesn’t know me like that 😅 The whole time I was watching Nicole Kidman loudly having sex, all I could think was, ‘Can Gloria hear this shit?!’ 😳 She’s this old black lady who has lived next door to me since I moved in 13 years ago.  Save your money, guys. I have this movie illegally downloaded on my laptop if you really wanna see it. Or you can just watch free porn online 😆

• Valentine’s Day Gift Bags
• The Bruery “Goses are Red” Beer
• Lost Farm Strawberry Chews
• Sugarfina Pucker Up Sugar Lips
• Airheads Valentine’s Mini Bars
• Dove Valentine’s Dark Chocolate Hearts
• Reese’s Valentine’s Day Peanut Butter Hearts
• Dove Valentine’s Milk Chocolate Hearts
• Twix Valentine’s Minis
• Kit Kat Valentine’s Day Milk Chocolate Wafers
• Snickers Valentine’s Minis
• Rolo Valentine’s Day Chocolate Caramels
• M&M’s Valentine’s Milk Chocolate
• Welch’s Valentines Day Exchange Fruit Snacks
• Sour Punch Valentine’s Cupid Straws
• Haribo Valentine’s Goldbears Gummi Candy
• Sour Patch Kids Valentine’s Hearts Theater Box
• Jolly Rancher Valentine’s Day Jelly Hearts
• Starburst FaveReds Conversation Hearts
• Skittles Valentine’s Exchange Kit
• Blow Pops Valentine’s Day Classroom Exchange Bubble Gum Pops
• Bath & Body Works 4EVER SWEET PocketBac Hand Sanitizer

When I went to Sugarfina for some Sugar Lips candy, the cashier remembered me from when I bought a bunch of Mistletoe Kisses for my Christmas gift bags. ‘You’re so sweet and generous!’ she said. Duh 💁🏻‍♀️ Giving is my love language, lady 💕

Three of my dear friends have been diagnosed with breast cancer just in the past five years. Jessie and Christine luckily didn’t have to do chemo (they were able to kick cancer’s ass with surgery and radiation), so this is uncharted territory for us all.

Alicia was recently diagnosed with Stage 2 Breast Cancer after a routine mammogram, and she starts chemotherapy soon. She sent me flowers when I was in the hospital after the stroke, and it totally brightened my day, so I sent her flowers from all the girls we went to Joshua Tree with. She said she felt so loved when she received them 🥰

I want to make her as comfortable as she can be during this difficult time, so I got her a few things:

• UpNature Peppermint Essential Oil Roll On – Nausea is one of the most well-known chemotherapy side effects, and hopefully this peppermint roll on can quell some of it.
• Anti-Nausea Acupressure Wrist Bands – My sister gets seriously sea sick whenever she rides a boat (Caborette Booze Cruise 2015, anyone?), and no amount of ginger pills, essential oils, wrist bands or prayers could keep her from getting sick, but hopefully these work on Alicia 😅
• Simply Mints – Mints are supposed to help with nausea, too. They had ginger mints also, but when Alicia and I worked at AAA (we started the same day and first met on the elevator!), this lady, Betsy, would always offer Alicia ginger candy, and she hated it! We knew we’d be best friends when we realized we hated a lot of the same things 😆
• Cold Therapy Socks & Hand Ice Pack Cold Gloves – Chemo can cause neuropathy in your appendages, and this is supposed to help with that.
• Hydro Flask – it’s important to stay hydrated, and it’s much easier to do when your drinks stay ice cold for hours.
• Lotus and Luna Master Healer Chakra Healing Layered Bracelet – because I’m a believer of this woo-woo bullshit 🤪 plus it’s pretty!
• Pill Organizer – I take medication 4x a day, and sometimes I forget (despite the 4 alarms that go off on my phone every day). It’s just easier to remember when you have a pill organizer.
• Big Blanket Co. Premier Plush Hoodie – A common chemo side effect is feeling cold (and she is already one of those people who’s always cold!). I already got her a sherpa wearable throw and fleece-lined socks last Christmas, but she could use more cozy warmth.
• Cactus Blossom Candle – I’m the ultimate consumer. Half the things I own, I saw an ad for on instagram, and this candle is no exception.

I’ve been at a work conference this whole week (@ westdrift Manhattan Beach, Autograph Collection)

Since we work remotely, and it’s our team’s first year switching to the Digital department from Advertising, most of us haven’t met in person since it was our first time attending this Digital Summit, and none of us use our real photo on Slack 😆

Most of my coworkers stayed at the hotel, because even though they live in LA, they still live over an hour away, and our days started @ 8:30am and last night, we didn’t get back to the hotel till after 10pm! The hotel is only 8 minutes away from my apartment, so I drove each day. Except the first night, I had too much to drink at dinner and took a $10 uber home 😅

Nothing says LA like a Taco Bell Cantina and an injury lawyer billboard on Hollywood Blvd.

We took a ‘City of Lights’ bus tour of LA, even though most of us live here. We went to LACMA, the La Brea Tar Pits, Urban Lights, Hollywood Stars, Sunset Blvd. and the Promenade.

It’s been raining all week. Sucks for everyone who came to town hoping to escape the cold 🥶 LA really needed the rain after those devastating fires, though. During the tour, our guide got an evacuation alert for mudslides near his house 😅

Dinner & drinks (@ 1212 Santa Monica)

The presentations were pretty dry, but the creative team stayed entertained in the back sending inappropriate messages 😆

I love working remotely, but I miss these clowns already 🥲

Wellness weekend in Joshua Tree 🌵✨

It was Shi’s birthday weekend and she wanted to do a sound bath at The Integratron. Chel and I have done it before, but it was Shi, Pammie and Alicia’s first time.

Shi loves Friends, so we got her a bag of crap for her birthday!

It was filled with Friends Bum Bumz! Something I knew Shi would love, but she’d never buy for herself.

This was the perfect place for Shi, because no one loves space like she does (as evident by the picture of her aboard the Starship Enterprise inside her closet in her old bedroom at her parents’ house) 🖖🏼

The Integratron is built on a vortex and is supposed to be a point of concentrated spiritual energy, so of course I had to buy some crystals and palo santo from the gift shop.

While waiting to have dinner at Pappy & Harriet’s, we explored Pioneertown.

We stumbled upon The Rusty Nickel, where you can find ‘Art, Rust, Souvenirs & Dust – Free dust with every purchase!’ It was a weird little shop with oddities. When I was paying for my horror stickers, the lady ringing me up was like, ‘Has anyone ever told you that you sound like Jennifer Tilly?’ The stroke altered my voice, so I’m really self-conscious about speaking aloud. I’ve been told I sound like Marge from The Simpsons, but never Jennifer Tilly! Chel was like, ‘Who’s Jennifer Tilly?’ Uhh, The Bride of Chucky? AKA the highest of compliments LOL.

Without betraying our safe space, I will say lots of tears were shed and we all needed this wellness weekend. It’s easy for me to say what I want to say on this blog, because I know only like one person reads it (Hi, Shi LOL). But I have a hard time talking about my feelings or crying in front of other people. Chel is my cousin, so she’s seen me cry at family funerals at least, Pammie is my sister, so she’s seen me cry and made me cry since I was a baby LOL, Shi is my heart twin and has seen me at my absolute worst, so we’ve both seen each other ugly cry, Alicia thinks I’m perfect and has never seen me cry before this weekend or even heard me fart LOL. If only she knew what a gassy mess I really am.

I think I always thought of crying as a weakness, because my mom is so strong. Whenever she’s been hospitalized, she didn’t even tell her siblings because she didn’t want them to see her like that. She broke her wrist last month, and just casually mentioned it to me and my sister a week after it happened like it was no bigs.

You never know what someone is going through or what they’re struggling with. This weekend taught me that it’s okay to be vulnerable around the people you love…

(via @kelseydianeblog)

It’s hard for me to say, I’m jealous of the way
You’re happy without me

On my way to my nail appointment today, I was listening to my ‘Liked Songs’ playlist on Spotify of just random songs I’ve liked over the years. This cover of Labrinth’s Jealous sung by the Vanderbilt Melodores came up, and I don’t know if it was because it was raining, or because of the dulcet tones of the all-male a cappella group led by a Korean dude, or because I got my 12-year work anniversary certificate in the mail + a voucher for a free pair of shoes today LOL, but Jesus, I got emotional 😭

Sooo a sheer dress like the one Kanye’s wife wore to the Grammy’s is inappropriate? 😅

The new Ministry of Magic inside The Wizarding World of Harry Potter opens at Universal Orlando this year, but I hate Trump more than I love Disney or Universal Studios (I barely even go to the ones we have in SoCal), so you won’t find me in Florida or any other red state in the foreseeable future.

(via @emp.press)

Can’t believe we have four more years of this bullshit 🙄

(via @theinstitutecorona)

(via @themusicverse_)

(via @zeroflexnz)

(via @littlemanyu_)

I saw this news blooper years ago and these anchors are now married 🤗

(via @ebwinter)

Few things bring me more joy than reels of people getting hurt that people add music to, dogs getting pampered, news bloopers, and CVS receipts 😆

I used to use the Swarm app, where you would check in to the places you’d go. I used it partly for posterity’s sake (it would tell you the last time you were there), but mostly because I was the mayor of Crab Hut for years 😆

While I was using the app many years ago, this guy I used to mess with hit me up after he saw I checked into European Wax Center. I no longer use the Swarm app, go to Crab Hut, or fuck with fuckboys from Hollywood, but do I need to put a Brazilian on the books? At my age? 👵🏻😅

Used to know you well, now I’m chasing a ghost
Dancing with your skeleton’s rattling bones

Obsessed.

Heard this song on KROQ and it’s been on repeat ever since. They remind me of Arctic Monkeys, The Strokes and Tame Impala. I really want to see them live, but they have a show in LA when I’ll be on vacation. I’ll only be gone for 2 weeks, but I’m gonna miss Innings Festival, Balu Brigada at The Echo, Phantogram at the Hollywood Palladium, Andy Grammer at The Magnolia, and Deftones at Kia Forum 😭

I’ve just discovered Moo Deng’s live feed, so I’ll just be here the rest of my life.

Chinese food for Lunar New Year (@ Northern Cafe)

Are we doing it right???

Also, my lesbian aunt sent me this memoji video, and it’s the best thing I’ve seen all year 😆

It’s getting harder and harder to get together with the girls with 4 kids between us (none of which are my own 😅), work trips (Pammie just came back from SF, Christine is going to Belgium in a couple weeks, and Pammie has to go to Scottsdale and the Philippines next month), vacations (Jessie’s going to Hawaii next week and Pammie and I are going to Japan next month), and California being literally on fire. We’ve had dinner at Fort Oak on the books for a while, but my car has had this thing dragging under it since earlier this week, and I thought I should get it checked out before driving back to LA in the rain last night. So we had pizza at Jessie’s instead, while Abe and his head lamp fixed my car LOL, and we played with Baby Isaac and loved on her pups, Koda and Milo. I left with my tummy full, my car fixed, my heart full, and absolutely covered in dog fur.

We were talking about a friend who drinks to the point that they black out, and I’m like, ‘I’ve never drank so much that I blacked out,’ to which Jessie and Christine listed all the times I got black out drunk in my 20s 😅 Does it count if it happened over 20 years ago??? Apparently it does, and I could never play ‘Never Have I Ever’ with these B’s 😆 Are you even really friends if you don’t call each other out on your shit???

Since we were celebrating Pammie’s December birthday and Christine and my January birthdays, Jessie got us pizookies from BJ’s! 🍪

Jessie: Did you know you can get it raw at BJ’s?
Everyone: 😳😳😳

If it wasn’t clear, I’m Team Justin (Baldoni, Timberlake, Bieber LOL).

I first saw him when I came across this post from Jane the Virgin‘s final table read, and I was like, ‘Who is this guy?!’ I binge-watched all five seasons and have watched everything Justin Baldoni has been in or directed since.

I’ve gotten bad vibes from Blake Lively since before Gossip Girl, when she was in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (20 years ago!). Plus, how trustworthy can a person be who chooses Taylor Swift as the godmother to her children??? Like, have you not one closer friend? 😆

(via @solomongiorgio)

(via @_miss.serendipitous)

I switched my CVS Pharmacy from SD to LA to get all my prescriptions up here. The CVS closest to me is up the street inside a Target, and the line forms down the aisle that sells condoms and male incontinence diapers. Like, there isn’t a more uncomfortable aisle to wait for my antidepressants in 😅

I’d switch to another CVS, but I had a bad experience at the other one closest to me. Many, many, many years ago (in my wild youth), I was buying some Plan B. You have to get it at the pharmacy, but it’s over-the-counter, so they send you to the front to ring you up. While I’m up there, the guy gets on the intercom and was like, ‘Price check on Plan B? Price check on Plan B?’ I looked at him like, ‘Are you fucking serious right now? Is this a dream?’